Post by Alexander The So-so on Nov 12, 2009 13:04:56 GMT -5
Yeah, a classic problem, and I was wondering what you guys would suggest I do (in all seriousness, if you don't mind ). Here's the sitch:
I'm in college (my senior year, actually), so, of course, I have roommate. At first, we got along pretty well, with a few shared interests and parties and so forth. Over time, though, we simply drifted apart, which was fine, because it turns out we didn't have that much in common. That wasn't a problem.
No, the problem is that he's been becoming more of an inconsiderate douch within the past month. Here's a review:
Around this past Halloween weekend, he and his girlfriend were having a fight. For the millionth time. Let me just say that they're relationship is absolutely unpredictable; living with it is like living with a person with Bipolar Disorder. They go from being fine and getting along, to having enormous, emotional, dramatic fights, to make-up sex, and over and over again, all the time. This ain't the recommended "a little conflict is necessary for a healthy relationship" thing either; like I said, they're absolutely bipolar.
(oh, and they don't actually call each other their "boyfriend and girlfriend" either; they have sex, they won't date any other people, and see each other all the time, but apparently they've said that they think using those terms is a commitment they're not ready for. Yeeaaaaaaahhh...)
So, anyway, on Halloween weekend, they had they're zillionth fight. In our dorm. I was alone in the room minding my own business when in they burst battling each other. It was, as you may guess, pretty uncomfortable for me. Later that day, after he got done having another fight with her over the phone this time, I happened to enter around the time that the phone call got over, and he snapped at me because of his stupid fight. He never apologized for any of this. I, for my part, bit my tongue.
Monday after that weekend. I get home after classes at about 6 in the evening, as always, when...surprise! They've gotten back together. And they've locked themselves in our bedroom. The same bedroom where my work for a long-term assignment that I had been hoping to work on is. So, I can't get to it. I wouldn't have minded if I had an some advance warning, like a text saying "hey, can I have the room alone?" since, like I said, I can hardly keep up with the state of their circus of a relationship. But, nada. This exact same thing happened the day right after, too.
Then he'd also do other really inconsiderate things. Small things, but they just keep piling up. I get up at 7 AM in the morning every weekday due to early classes, and I told them this toward the beginning around when we met. So because I get up early, that means I have to bed early. That hasn't stopped him from a) playing his bass guitar at 10:30-11 at night, keeping me awake, or b) having his friends over until 11 at night playing music loudly, getting drunk, and having mini-parties with 2 or 3 of his friends. On weeknights.
Then, the final straw came last night. This time, he had about 5 or 6 of his friends over late at night. Again, a weeknight. Let's just say that they smoked a...certain substance (which he's a regular user of). After doing...that, they preceded to play music, talk loudly (about things that you'd stereotypically picture people in that frame of mind talking about), crank up music, play Slapjack (which entailed me hearing the *SMACK* of hands on the table and the loud exclamations of winning and losing). After two failed attempts at telling my roommate to quiet down, when it got to be 11:15 at night and they were still making noise, I finally lost my patience and got them to leave.
Which brings me to today. This morning, while we're in the room, he comes up to me and says, and I quote verbatim:
"Alex, can I give you some advice? You'd probably have more friends if you weren't such a tight ass. Just take that for what it's worth."
I responded with my main issue: it's not an issue of me being anti-fun. It's about him not being considerate to me, and thinking that he's the only one who lives here. He pretty much did a "whatever" response before I could elaborate, and left.
So, what do I do? The point I want to get across is: I don't care what he does with his own life. He can do whatever he wants as long as it doesn't infringe on my right to do what I want. But he's being totally inconsiderate and acting like he's the only one who lives here. I've done nothing to protest or criticize anything he's done until now. His stupid crack that he made didn't faze me personally, but it just shows that he's got nothing to justify how he's been behaving and is just going to resort to petty insults to avoid facing that fact. Besides the issues of him being noisy as all hell late at night on weekdays, and with getting me caught up in the effects of his roller coaster relationship, I've got nothing against anything he does. But apparently, that's enough to make me a "tight ass."
So, advice?
I'm in college (my senior year, actually), so, of course, I have roommate. At first, we got along pretty well, with a few shared interests and parties and so forth. Over time, though, we simply drifted apart, which was fine, because it turns out we didn't have that much in common. That wasn't a problem.
No, the problem is that he's been becoming more of an inconsiderate douch within the past month. Here's a review:
Around this past Halloween weekend, he and his girlfriend were having a fight. For the millionth time. Let me just say that they're relationship is absolutely unpredictable; living with it is like living with a person with Bipolar Disorder. They go from being fine and getting along, to having enormous, emotional, dramatic fights, to make-up sex, and over and over again, all the time. This ain't the recommended "a little conflict is necessary for a healthy relationship" thing either; like I said, they're absolutely bipolar.
(oh, and they don't actually call each other their "boyfriend and girlfriend" either; they have sex, they won't date any other people, and see each other all the time, but apparently they've said that they think using those terms is a commitment they're not ready for. Yeeaaaaaaahhh...)
So, anyway, on Halloween weekend, they had they're zillionth fight. In our dorm. I was alone in the room minding my own business when in they burst battling each other. It was, as you may guess, pretty uncomfortable for me. Later that day, after he got done having another fight with her over the phone this time, I happened to enter around the time that the phone call got over, and he snapped at me because of his stupid fight. He never apologized for any of this. I, for my part, bit my tongue.
Monday after that weekend. I get home after classes at about 6 in the evening, as always, when...surprise! They've gotten back together. And they've locked themselves in our bedroom. The same bedroom where my work for a long-term assignment that I had been hoping to work on is. So, I can't get to it. I wouldn't have minded if I had an some advance warning, like a text saying "hey, can I have the room alone?" since, like I said, I can hardly keep up with the state of their circus of a relationship. But, nada. This exact same thing happened the day right after, too.
Then he'd also do other really inconsiderate things. Small things, but they just keep piling up. I get up at 7 AM in the morning every weekday due to early classes, and I told them this toward the beginning around when we met. So because I get up early, that means I have to bed early. That hasn't stopped him from a) playing his bass guitar at 10:30-11 at night, keeping me awake, or b) having his friends over until 11 at night playing music loudly, getting drunk, and having mini-parties with 2 or 3 of his friends. On weeknights.
Then, the final straw came last night. This time, he had about 5 or 6 of his friends over late at night. Again, a weeknight. Let's just say that they smoked a...certain substance (which he's a regular user of). After doing...that, they preceded to play music, talk loudly (about things that you'd stereotypically picture people in that frame of mind talking about), crank up music, play Slapjack (which entailed me hearing the *SMACK* of hands on the table and the loud exclamations of winning and losing). After two failed attempts at telling my roommate to quiet down, when it got to be 11:15 at night and they were still making noise, I finally lost my patience and got them to leave.
Which brings me to today. This morning, while we're in the room, he comes up to me and says, and I quote verbatim:
"Alex, can I give you some advice? You'd probably have more friends if you weren't such a tight ass. Just take that for what it's worth."
I responded with my main issue: it's not an issue of me being anti-fun. It's about him not being considerate to me, and thinking that he's the only one who lives here. He pretty much did a "whatever" response before I could elaborate, and left.
So, what do I do? The point I want to get across is: I don't care what he does with his own life. He can do whatever he wants as long as it doesn't infringe on my right to do what I want. But he's being totally inconsiderate and acting like he's the only one who lives here. I've done nothing to protest or criticize anything he's done until now. His stupid crack that he made didn't faze me personally, but it just shows that he's got nothing to justify how he's been behaving and is just going to resort to petty insults to avoid facing that fact. Besides the issues of him being noisy as all hell late at night on weekdays, and with getting me caught up in the effects of his roller coaster relationship, I've got nothing against anything he does. But apparently, that's enough to make me a "tight ass."
So, advice?