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Post by Jay Carroll on Mar 24, 2010 11:13:06 GMT -5
*Jay Carroll is seen walking around Bayside High. Once he sees a cameraman, he points and demands that the cameraman walks over.* Yeah, I see you walking around looking for something to shoot. It's your lucky day, sunshine. Here's an exclusive.
Two days ago, I was wrestling for a chance at a prestigious championship, for te right to face off against a former world champion. I was literally one second away from getting to kick Jazzman's ass again, but as fate would have it, I lost. And now? I get to square off with the other semi-final loser, who was too busy fighting with some other guy who's name I can't pronounce to, you know, WIN A FRIGGIN MATCH, a Kurt Kobain sound a like, some inspector guy who's been stealing my stique of abusing interviewers, a fat rapper I've beaten 3 times already, and that guy who's name I can't pronounce.
As far as I'm concerned, it's myself and 5 losers this Sunday. You can either bet on The Champagne Standard, or the field. I'd take The Champagne Standard if I were you. Think about it, I've beaten a former world champ, and I've heald a title here. That's more than everyone else in this match can say.
Now get out of my face.
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Post by delurked on Mar 24, 2010 15:44:24 GMT -5
A WWCF.com exclusive:
Jerry Fish: I’m talking to Titanothere, the Monster of the Mesozoic Age, about his participation in the Six Pack Challenge at the upcoming Saved by the Bell pay per view. Titan, the WWCF will be using the results of this match to help determine the wrestlers’ official rankings. What are your thoughts?
Titanothere (in his ring gear and helmet): It’s a great way to do it. No politics, no quid pro quo: just half a dozen men fighting it out to determine their place in the pecking order.
Fish: Who do you think is the odds on favorite to win the Challenge?
Titanothere: Well, the obvious choices are “Champagne” Jay Carroll and Smokin Vokoun. Both men made it to the quarterfinals in the Tournament of Honor and, while losing, still looked strong in defeat.
Fish: You must be happy to have played a role in Vokoun’s loss by count out to Jazzman.
Titanothere: Jerry, I’ll be happy when Smokin’ Vokoun gets his comeuppance for the rampage he’s committed to the WWCF roster since joining the federation, hopefully by my hands. But my primary concern at Saved by the Bell is beating the all the competition. Besides “Champagne” Jay Carroll and Vokoun I’m going to have to face a determined Inspector Shetty, a seemingly unbalanced and dangerous Cage King, and a skilled high flyer in Kris Kobain.
Fish: You hold a victory over Kobain, though there are some who think the win was tainted, that referee Lloyd McFloyd called the match too early.
Titanothere: I can see that side of it. But even if they’re right Kobain was going to lose. It was just a matter of when. The great thing about the World Wrestlecrap Federation though is there’s always a chance for a rematch. The Six Pack Challenge will be the perfect opportunity for Kris Kobain, myself, and every other wrestler in it, to prove their worth.
Fish: Titanothere, thank you for taking time to talk with us.
Titanothere: No problem, Jerry. You’re still coming out to Dave and Buster’s after work, right? My sister really wants to meet you.
Fish (pauses uncomfortably): Can I see her picture again?
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smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on Mar 24, 2010 16:34:16 GMT -5
I'm not gonna yell, and I'm not gonna scream. But, I have something else....sheer determination. Titanothere, you had no business in my match with Jazzman. Hell, you had no business in my match with Evil M either, but you just keep coming and coming. And that's fine Titan, that's perfectlly fine. But, heed this warning my fat friend, the time is coming where you will have to face your ultimate punishment. And believe me Titanothere, those chair shots your head, and the ONE CHAIR SHOT TO MYY HEAD!!!...*Vokoun takes a deep breath* Are meer love taps compared to what I have in store for you. You see Titan, back in the school yards of my youth, the punishment rarely fit the crime. Some one would steal a Bologna sandwhich from a kid, and that kid WOULD THAT OTHER KID IN THE HOSPITAL!!! *He's lost control* And let me tell you something Titanothere...YOU WILL BE SENT TO THE HOSPITAL ONCE AGAIN...or worse....IN A BODYBAG!!!! Oh....did I offend you Titanothere? Did I scare wittle Titan? DEAL WITH IT!!! After this little six pack thingy, I'm issueing you a challenge.....A CHALLENGE TO FACE ME ONE ON ONE!!! I don't know what kind of match it's gonna be...but I WILL THINK ABOUT IT!!! So I want you to think about it too. *He starts to giggle* Just....think about it.HAHAHAHAHA[/color]
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 24, 2010 16:49:02 GMT -5
As far as I'm concerned...you AND your little posse are going to slowly crumble at my feet. You know who you are...partner.
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Post by delurked on Mar 24, 2010 16:53:31 GMT -5
I'm not gonna yell, and I'm not gonna scream. But, I have something else....sheer determination. Titanothere, you had no business in my match with Jazzman. Hell, you had no business in my match with Evil M either, but you just keep coming and coming. And that's fine Titan, that's perfectlly fine. But, heed this warning my fat friend, the time is coming where you will have to face your ultimate punishment. And believe me Titanothere, those chair shots your head, and the ONE CHAIR SHOT TO MYY HEAD!!!...*Vokoun takes a deep breath* Are meer love taps compared to what I have in store for you. You see Titan, back in the school yards of my youth, the punishment rarely fit the crime. Some one would steal a Bologna sandwhich from a kid, and that kid WOULD THAT OTHER KID IN THE HOSPITAL!!! *He's lost control* And let me tell you something Titanothere...YOU WILL BE SENT TO THE HOSPITAL ONCE AGAIN...or worse....IN A BODYBAG!!!! Oh....did I offend you Titanothere? Did I scare wittle Titan? DEAL WITH IT!!! After this little six pack thingy, I'm issueing you a challenge.....A CHALLENGE TO FACE ME ONE ON ONE!!! I don't know what kind of match it's gonna be...but I WILL THINK ABOUT IT!!! So I want you to think about it too. *He starts to giggle* Just....think about it.HAHAHAHAHA [/color][/quote] How about a Bologna Sandwich on a Pole Match?
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,522
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Mar 24, 2010 17:57:53 GMT -5
I need to get something to eat, I hate airplane food.
This looks like a good place.
There's a booth over there by the fourth wall.
Jonathan and Sara sit down.
Like, hi, I'll totally be your server today, what would you like, like?
We'll have two cheeseburgers and fries.
Okay, like, I'll be right back.
I don't sound like that, do I?
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smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on Mar 24, 2010 18:16:13 GMT -5
I'm not gonna yell, and I'm not gonna scream. But, I have something else....sheer determination. Titanothere, you had no business in my match with Jazzman. Hell, you had no business in my match with Evil M either, but you just keep coming and coming. And that's fine Titan, that's perfectlly fine. But, heed this warning my fat friend, the time is coming where you will have to face your ultimate punishment. And believe me Titanothere, those chair shots your head, and the ONE CHAIR SHOT TO MYY HEAD!!!...*Vokoun takes a deep breath* Are meer love taps compared to what I have in store for you. You see Titan, back in the school yards of my youth, the punishment rarely fit the crime. Some one would steal a Bologna sandwhich from a kid, and that kid WOULD THAT OTHER KID IN THE HOSPITAL!!! *He's lost control* And let me tell you something Titanothere...YOU WILL BE SENT TO THE HOSPITAL ONCE AGAIN...or worse....IN A BODYBAG!!!! Oh....did I offend you Titanothere? Did I scare wittle Titan? DEAL WITH IT!!! After this little six pack thingy, I'm issueing you a challenge.....A CHALLENGE TO FACE ME ONE ON ONE!!! I don't know what kind of match it's gonna be...but I WILL THINK ABOUT IT!!! So I want you to think about it too. *He starts to giggle* Just....think about it.HAHAHAHAHA [/color][/quote] How about a Bologna Sandwich on a Pole Match?[/quote] I seriously doubt, that you could climb a pole...WITH YOUR MASSIVE GIRTH....NO MATTER HOW HUNGRY YOU ARE FOR THAT BOLOGNA SANDWHICH!!![/color]
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Post by Jay Carroll on Mar 24, 2010 18:28:36 GMT -5
*Jay Carroll is out jogging around the track at Bayside High. A large group of fans has gathered to watch, cheer, and ask for autographs.*
You idiots, it is NOT 1993 and I am NOT Mark-Paul Gosselaar. Now back up, I'm not friendly.
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Mar 24, 2010 18:40:20 GMT -5
OK, times are tough and stuff but why the hell are we doing show from a highschool. We are not a small indie company
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smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on Mar 24, 2010 19:00:12 GMT -5
AHHHHH *Holds his head* This ppv IS AT A HIGH SCHOOL!!!!? AHHHH....this just reopens bad...bad..BAD MEMORIES!!![/color]
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 24, 2010 19:01:41 GMT -5
Didn't go to High School
If I win the tag titles does that count as a Diploma?
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Mar 24, 2010 19:03:15 GMT -5
Didn't go to High School
If I win the tag titles does that count as a Diploma? You're a lawyer, how can you not have a Diploma?
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 24, 2010 19:06:30 GMT -5
Didn't go to High School
If I win the tag titles does that count as a Diploma? You're a lawyer, how can you not have a Diploma? I won my certification online cause I was the 10,000th visitor
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Mar 24, 2010 19:08:13 GMT -5
You're a lawyer, how can you not have a Diploma? I won my certification online cause I was the 10,000th visitor Is that how you got your job here to, because it's damn sure not due to your wrestling skills Tag
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 24, 2010 19:11:54 GMT -5
I won my certification online cause I was the 10,000th visitor Is that how you got your job here to, because it's damn sure not due to your wrestling skills Tag What's that say about those I beat then?
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Mar 24, 2010 19:14:00 GMT -5
Is that how you got your job here to, because it's damn sure not due to your wrestling skills Tag What's that say about those I beat then? Who you beaten, retired hacks like Starshine and your little "friend" Jay Carrol
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,522
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Mar 24, 2010 19:14:24 GMT -5
The Manager walks up to Jonathan and Sara's booth.
Excuse me, are you Jonathan Michaels and Sara Nakatomi?
Yes, we are.
I hate to impose, but our usual entertainment, one of our waiters who does magic, couldn't make it tonight, we were wondering if perhaps you guys could do an interview segment right here in the restaurant?
Whoa, timeout.
The entire restaurant freezes, except for Jonathan, who addresses the camera.
This guy wants us to do Nakatomi Plaza here in the restaurant?
We just got into town, we're jetlagged, and I don't even know who she'd interview?
Then again, Who are we to refuse a fan's request?
Plus maybe free food.
Can I move now, I wanna finish my fries.
Time in.
Everything unfreezes.
We'd love to.
Yeah, sure.
Great, I'll find someone for you to interview.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 24, 2010 19:18:25 GMT -5
What's that say about those I beat then? Who you beaten, retired hacks like Starshine and your little "friend" Jay Carrol There was this one mouthy little fella who tagged with Starshine Circle?,Triangle?..............Box?
Bah doesn't matter he's probably not important
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Johnny B. Decent
Patti Mayonnaise
Had one once
Everybody's Favorite Arizonian.
Posts: 31,175
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Post by Johnny B. Decent on Mar 24, 2010 19:19:41 GMT -5
As far as I'm concerned...you AND your little posse are going to slowly crumble at my feet. You know who you are...partner. Yeah, TheSam and his Family are in fear of you, I bet.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 24, 2010 22:04:41 GMT -5
Ah, finally this wretched highschool get's some REAL teachers, rather than those hacks, like Mr. Dewey.
Isn't that right, YJ?
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