WCTNA Thread 35: TNA based efed

[OB91]

Angelina trips Lacey who then clotheslines Velvet.

Yeah..

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Lacey locks on the Claw and turns it into a slam. 1-2-3!

Val: Here is your winner, Lacey von Erich!

Tenay: Lacey building momentum for Leather and Lace's tag title shot at the PPV.

Traci comes in and raises Lacey's hand while the BP head up the ramp. Lacey locks eyes with Angelina, who smiles and gives her a thumbs up. Lacey looks even more confused than normal. Lacey and Traci turn around only to get taken down but a double clothesline from Kong who has snuck into the ring behind them.

Tenay: Speaking of which there's Kong!
West: And Sarita too. talk about a moment killer.

Sarita shoves Kong and points to Traci. Kong picks Lacey up and hits the Implant Buster. Sarita throws Lacey to Kong. Kong hits the Awesome Bomb onto Traci. Sarita slaps Kong again and the two of them leave.

Tenay: Thunder and Lightning sending a message to the challengers here.
West: That was more than a message, that was an anniliation. What chance do Lacey and Traci really have against Kong and Sarita?

*Cut to Kevin Nash IN THE BACK~! with his microphone, but no SoCal Val. He grins to the fans, waving at the Impact Zone.*

"How are you doing out there? Prep for the PCS is still underway, and as a matter of fact I have several very interested parties, so it seems. It'll have to wait a few more weeks. Something about getting permits for all the testing I need to do...and management questioning my doctorate. In the meantime, looks like I get to beat up Desmond Wolfe. I gotta ask, who the heck is Desmond Wolfe?"

*Nash grins again, shrugging to himself. He puts on his smart glasses and pulls out his pipe, pondering it with the pipe in. He finally gives up.*

"I dunno. Never heard of the guy. And that's his problem. He hasn't done anything worthwhile here. Not here, not anywhere else. Look, you think you can beat me? So you beat Abyss. Big deal. Abyss, though he's big and strong and scary to some, is no Kevin Nash. He is NOT Big Sexy, not by a long shot. You aren't any six-time World Champion. All you are is some British guy with a grudge to settle with Bobby Lashley. You ain't the only one who wants a piece of Bobby, believe you me."

*Nash grins, swapping out the smart glasses for a pair of his own sunglasses. He flashes the smile that stole a thousand hearts at the crowd, sending the female fans into a frenzy.*

"Look, Des. I'm sure you're good enough to beat most men in the locker room. But you just aren't...BIG enough to hang with guys like me. You wanna prove me wrong, feel free to try. But until then, I'm gonna feel free to doubt you, El Dandy. See you ringside, boys and girls. I got a little work to do."

*Nash walks offscreen, though the audio and video keep rolling.*

"No, no, put the crate down there! No! Don't drop it! Don't drop the damn crate! There are very delicate and sensitive instruments in there, and I need them for the proper execution of this championship seri—"

*CRASH!*

"NO! MY JACK! That's it! I'm gonna kill you, you son of a—"

*A man in an UPS uniform runs across the shot, pursued by an angry Nash. We go back to Tenay and West on this somewhat strange note.*

[OB91]

Nice promo Brainbustah!

[Brainbustaaah!]

Thanks, man.

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Val: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, representing the Nastation and accompanied by Jerry Sags and Okada, at a combined weight of 495 pounds, Tomko and Kiyoshi!

Tenay: The Nastation in action as they look for a tag title match.
West: We undertsand that issue will be resolved next week on iMPACT.



Val: Their opponents, from Great Britain, at a combined weight of 495 pounds, Doug Williams and Rob Terry, GBH!

Tenay: Speaking of title shots, GBH still have that Fast or Fired case but time is running out to use it.
West: Really? I kinda forgot about that.

Tomko and Kiyoshi v GBH
3 votes
10 minutes

[Brainbustaaah!]

Terry with a big boot!

[MikeyMania]

Tomko with a boot to Terry.

[OB91]

Hmmm.....

Tomko with belly to belly suplex on Williams.

[The Tank]

Kiyoshi and Tomko with stereo big boots.

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Tonko and Terry hit boots at the smae time, taking eachother down. Tonko tags Kiyoshi as Terry tags Williams. Williams hits rights on Kiyoshi followed by a European Uppercut. Williams goes for the Chaos Theory but Kiyoshi hits a mule kick to get out of it. Tomko then comes in and hits a boot to Williams, then takes out Terry. Kiyoshi gets the pin on Williams. 1-2-3!

Val: Here are your winners, the Nastation!

West: They gotta get a tag title shot after that.
Tenay: I'm being informed that there will be an announcement about that after the show so stay tuned folks.

I'm here with WCTNA's newest tag team, The FBI!!!

EY!, EY!, EY! Who told'yu we need YOU here for this? WE got this YOU go away NOW!

*Guido snatches the mic from Val and points screen*

Scram!

Y'heard the man. Beat it, or we'll stop being so gentlemanly.

But...

Did that sound like a question? I THINK NOT! GO!!!

*So Cal Val quickly leaves.*

Sheesh, women. Speakin' of women, where's, uh...where's whatever her name is?

*Becky Bayless enters the frame, wearing nothing but caution tape.*

Right here. Do you guys need something, or...

'Ey, we shouldn't have to go over this more than once. You don't get paid to flap your lips. You get paid to stand around in that incredibly scant attire, got it?

Alright, alright!

Good. Now then...floor's yours, G.

Thanks T. Y'see we are the Fully Blooded Italian Americans. And we're here tonight to make a damn impact in the WCTNA Tag Division it's me Little Guido my brudda from anudda mudda Tony Luke and.............Boob Chick. What's her name again Tone?

Hm. You know, I do not recall. What exactly is your name again?

How many times do we have to go over this, I'm...

Not paid to speak. You're right, how many times DO we have to over this?

*sigh*

That's better.

Now then, it is exactly as my associate just made clear. We're back to make an impact because tag team wrestling has stagnated while we've been out of the wrestling scene. You've got two stoners running around with the belts, and not a one decent set of competitors in sight. We're here to change that.

And don't forget the number ONE most important thing about us being heya. The one thing that put us head and shoulders above all the others.

Machine Guns pssssh.
Neo Nasty's whatta you kiddin'?
Beeya Money? those mooks?

Tell these fine folks what that might be, my friend.

We're f***ing union of course.

Bingo. So, uh, we got anything else to add?

Oh yeah those tag titles?
Bada bing.

You know, that doesn't even mean anything. But point's still made. Tag belts, they're ours already. Jeff Hardy, do yourself a favor and hand over the belts right now. RVD'll tell ya what you're up against.

Bada boom.

...yeah. That. Alright, let's get the hell outta here. We got a couple of mooks to put in the ground tonight. Let's go.

*Tony Luke and Guido Maritato exit. So Cal Val returns from the other side and turns to Becky Bayless.*

How do you put up with those two?

Three words: six-figure contract.

*Becky walks off after the FBI.*

Ladies and gentlemen, the F......wait, six-figure contract?!?

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Val: The followingt contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, at a combined weight of 442 pounds, Shannon Moore and Jesse Neal, Ink Inc!

Tenay: Well it looks like Ink Inc. get the privilige of initiating WCTNA's newest team.
West: How does whats-her-name get a six figure contract?



Val: And their opponents, accompanied by Becky Bayless, from Little Italy, New York, at a combined weight of 350 pounds, Tony Luke and Guido Maritato, the FBI!

West: Well the FBI, or Full Blooded Italians, have had success in ECW back in the day but this is WCTNA.
Tenay: You can't say those three letters.
West: What, FBI?
Tenay: Nevermind.

FBI v Ink Inc
3 votes
10 minutes

[The Tank]

Aug 29, 2010 16:42:09 GMT -5 Perpetual Nirvana said:

West: How does whats-her-name get a six figure contract?

TNA has no understanding of the concept of proper allocation of funds, that's how!

SEE! IT'S DEEP!! IT'S SATIRE!!! IT'S NOT JUST A STUPID JOKE!!!!!




And uh...FBI with a double double underhook powerbomb to Shannon Moore. (No, I don't know how that would work.)

[OB91]

Guido with a top rope leg drop facebuster (Sicilian Slice).

[MikeyMania]

Guido with a Gibson Driver to Neal.

[Deleted]

FBI with a double flapjack or something!

[Perpetual Nirvana]

FBI hits the Kiss of Death of Neal. 1-2-3!

Val: Here are your winners, the FBI!

Tenay: The FBI makes their WCTNA debut with a win here.
West: And they'll be in the hunt for those tag title too.

Joining me at this time, the WCTNA World Tag Team Champions, Jeff Hardy and Rob Van Dam, High Flight.

Glad to be here.

Given your recent issues with the Motor City Machine Guns, why would you challenge them to a six man tag tonight?

As much as me and Rob would love to say we are the best tag team in the world, Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin pushed us to our limits at the last PPV and heck, even the Impacts before that. We might be standing here tag team champions but we're still not quite statisifed with everything that's gone down between the two sides so we figured that tonight could help us get one step closer to proving we are indeed better than the Guns. And besides, I doubt they mind being in the ring with us either.

We're not saying we can give The Guns a rematch, that's up for management to decide but there's no harm in giving them the chance to do so. Of course, we'll try our best to pick up a victory tonight but if we don't and the Guns do get another shot, we'll glady face them one more time. We've had some of our best work with them since coming to WCTNA.

And thats also another factor in regards to tonight's match. For years, people have said it would be a dream match to see The Hardys vs. The Guns. Now, I couldn't quite do that but I got the next best thing in my man, Rob, here and we've been tearing the house down ever since. However, we wanted to show our thanks to the fans so we thought how can we top ourselves? How can we make this series even more memorable?

And that's when we found out about the new talent coming into the company. Apparently, it wasn't just Dreamer and the FBI. So we looked down that list, we looked at each other and agreed, one name stood out to us more than any other. One man who lives up to the High Flight name and one man who makes this a dream team. That's when we got our partner.

And that is?

You'll find out soon enough. After all, it's not like The Guns are going to reveal their partner before the match, why should we? The only thing we can tell you is that he's back and more dedicated than ever.

Shelley, Sabin, you think the past month has been tough. Wait til you see what we've got planned tonight. You boys are going down, courtesy of the Whole F'N Show.

The Charismatic Enigma.

And the only man we know who can get higher than us.

In the ring, of course.

Come on Jeff, we still got time for a game of Hungry Hungry Hippos.

Thanks for your time. Back to ringside.

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Val: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Detroit, Michigan, at a combined weight of 420 pounds, Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin, the Motor City Machine Guns!

Tenay: The Guns came so close to winning the tag titles at Victory Road they'll want another shot.
West: We'll thay'll have to wait and see.

Val: And their partner...



Val: From Windsor, Ontario, Canada, weighing 179 pounds, Petey Williams!

Tenay: Petey Williams is back!
West: I dunno about this. It hasn't even been two months since he broke his leg, he may be rushing back too soon here.



Val: Their opponents, at a combined weight of 452 pounds, the are the WCTNA World Tag Team Champions, Jeff Hardy and Rob Van Dam, High Flight!

Tenay: High Flight challenged the Guns to this match so they clearly had a partner in mind already.
West: But who is it?

Val: And their partner...

*The lights go out. The crowd pop as they realise what this means and sure enough when the lights come back on, Sabu is standing in the middle of the ring!*

Tenay: It's Sabu! Sabu has returned to WCTNA!
West: Two returns for the price of one!

*the six men start brawling as the bell rings to start the match*

High Flight & Sabu v Motor City Machine Guns & Petey Williams
3 votes
10 minutes

[MikeyMania]

Sabu with a triple jump moonsault to Sabin.

[OB91]

Sabin with a Cradleshock to Hardy.

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Oh by the way:

Aug 29, 2010 16:52:45 GMT -5 Perpetual Nirvana said:

And the only man we know who can get higher than us.

THIS is a subtle joke, Tank.