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Post by Blade Braxton on May 18, 2007 3:03:24 GMT -5
If you listened to the radio show this week, you heard my sad tale of the Ghetto Amusement Park Skeletor & He-Man. I went to the park expecting a giant Mattel Toys sponsored event, with neato, bright, and flashy officially licensed costumed characters. What I got, was the nightmare fuel you see below. For your further amusement, behold the horrors...  There's the Lord Of Destruction himself, Ghetto Amusement Park Skeletor, looking a little more flesh colored than usual, looking like he lost a few teeth due to not being able to put down the crack pipe, and he's dressed kind of like Dracula. This was a few seconds before the smurfer started chasing me around the merry-go-round in an obvious cocaine-fueled rage. Who could save me?  Not this assclown, Ghetto Amusement Park He-Man, who looks like he pawned the Power Sword for an ounce of weed. By the Power Of Potheads!!!!!!!!!!! Oh yeah, nice orange tank top underneath the armor there, "He-Man." And believe it or not, even more frightening than Skeletor, was Ghetto Amusement Park Man-At-Arms. In a sane world, you could count on Man-At-Arms to save the day.  In this bizarro world I experienced that day, Ghetto Man-At-Arms has shaved his head, put on some mascara around his eyes and on top of his chrome dome, and striked a muscular pose like he was trying to woo a potential customer while he was man-whoring himself out on the point. I don't even want to know about the handcuffs he's wearing. Sigh, what a fraud-filled 1980's afternoon at Joyland, the Ghetto Amusement Park!!!!!!!! |
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Post by Tyfo on May 18, 2007 3:08:21 GMT -5
Even better then I visualized in my head while listening!!!
I would have had to KO the imposter douches. At least then you could say you took out He-Man and Skeletor at a Ghetto Amusement park!!
Maybe you'd get a freakin medal or something
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Post by THE Dinobot on May 18, 2007 3:32:15 GMT -5
And now starring Dana Carvey in Clash of the Titans! Also, for some strange reason, the eyes on Skeletor really freaked me out when first opened this. This is even more frightening than Keldor and/or Skeletor. Blade, that's the stuff of nightmares, yo. |
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Goldenbane
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Post by Goldenbane on May 18, 2007 11:57:58 GMT -5
I can't believe this Blade! You mean to say they had the gall and nerve to NOT have a Ghetto Amusement Park Clawful there to counter the Ghetto Amusement Park Man-At-Arms?
If I were you, I'd grab my deadliest construction tool, march over there...grab the park owner by the collar, show him those pictures and DEMAND your money/time/life back!!! Then tell him if you almost cut off your OWN fingers/hands/feet with this tool, imagine what you could do to him/her!
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Post by lildude8218 on May 18, 2007 13:37:14 GMT -5
La Parka has REALLY let himself go.... Joel and The Bots: JUDGE REINHOLD?!?!?!? Kojak on Acid: Who loves ya baby? |
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Erik Majorwitz
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
I don't have a PS3.
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Post by Erik Majorwitz on May 18, 2007 13:41:04 GMT -5
Wow, that is terrible, I'm surprised they didn't sour you on He-Man just as Michael Bay has tarnished the Transformer name forever.
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Post by Paul Servo on May 18, 2007 15:32:41 GMT -5
They should have tried to get Unemployed Skelletor. Not only does he at least look more like the character, it would give the poor guy a job
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Post by Blade Braxton on May 19, 2007 12:02:52 GMT -5
If I were you, I'd grab my deadliest construction tool, march over there...grab the park owner by the collar, show him those pictures and DEMAND your money/time/life back!!! I would, if only the park hadn't closed in the 80's. If I showed up complaining, they'd probably give me a used washer or dryer, or a dented can of soon to expire Del Monte vegetables, as the family has now turned it into a ghetto flea market. |
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Erik Majorwitz
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I don't have a PS3.
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Posts: 18,051
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Post by Erik Majorwitz on May 19, 2007 12:08:29 GMT -5
If I were you, I'd grab my deadliest construction tool, march over there...grab the park owner by the collar, show him those pictures and DEMAND your money/time/life back!!! I would, if only the park hadn't closed in the 80's. If I showed up complaining, they'd probably give me a used washer or dryer, or a dented can of soon to expire Del Monte vegetables, as the family has now turned it into a ghetto flea market. If that is the case, why aren't the MOTU mutants still working there? |
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Post by Blade Braxton on May 19, 2007 12:08:38 GMT -5
![]() Kojak on Acid: Who loves ya baby? Brilliant! Does anyone have any ideas if this "Man At Arms" mask is just a generic dollar store mask, or if it's based off a licensed character of some kind? If I had a gun pointed to my head, I would say it's a Kojak mask.  |
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Erik Majorwitz
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
I don't have a PS3.
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Post by Erik Majorwitz on May 19, 2007 12:10:33 GMT -5
![]() Kojak on Acid: Who loves ya baby? Brilliant! Does anyone have any ideas if this "Man At Arms" mask is just a generic dollar store mask, or if it's based off a licensed character of some kind? If I had a gun pointed to my head, I would say it's a Kojak mask. Methinks maybe it could be an Arnold mask with someone going crazy with a sharpie. Either that, or Abobo from Double Dragon. |
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Post by Blade Braxton on May 19, 2007 12:13:58 GMT -5
I would, if only the park hadn't closed in the 80's. If I showed up complaining, they'd probably give me a used washer or dryer, or a dented can of soon to expire Del Monte vegetables, as the family has now turned it into a ghetto flea market. If that is the case, why aren't the MOTU mutants still working there? All three probably died from botulism, due to eating some of the canned goods that I saw for sale there once. Seriously, who the hell buys USED soup, fruits, and vegetables at a flea market?!?!?! |
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Post by Blade Braxton on May 19, 2007 12:17:15 GMT -5
Brilliant! Does anyone have any ideas if this "Man At Arms" mask is just a generic dollar store mask, or if it's based off a licensed character of some kind? If I had a gun pointed to my head, I would say it's a Kojak mask. Methinks maybe it could be an Arnold mask with someone going crazy with a sharpie. Either that, or Abobo from Double Dragon. Well, these were taken in 1984 or 85, so it was before the Double Dragon era. Although I would like to see Abobo make a video game comeback dressed in Man-At-Arms clothing. |
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Post by THE Dinobot on May 19, 2007 12:29:46 GMT -5
Really more revolted at Man-At-Arms lack of mustache.
Come on, bro, could have at least took a marker and scribbled one in, Duncan was nothing without that killer 'stache.
And a helmet...which is really shocking that he isn't wearing, 'cause wearing thaaat mask to represent Man-At-Arms(?), the dude may have worn a helmet in his everyday life. 8)
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Matt Rogers
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Post by Matt Rogers on May 19, 2007 12:31:05 GMT -5
Skeletor looks like a gangrene Chipmunk.
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Post by Celtic Heat on May 19, 2007 12:51:39 GMT -5
People who aren't classy enough for the Food Bank.
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Post by robnoxious on May 24, 2007 21:54:19 GMT -5
This is much f***ing funnier than the Ghetto Robocop who made an appearence once at my local mall.
His outfit was blue,made of plastic and styrofoam and he had f***ing bumperstickers on his costume,Oh and he also had stubble and reeked of booze
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CMWaters
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Post by CMWaters on May 24, 2007 23:31:50 GMT -5
This is much smurfing funnier than the Ghetto Robocop who made an appearence once at my local mall. His outfit was blue,made of plastic and styrofoam and he had smurfing bumperstickers on his costume,Oh and he also had stubble and reeked of booze Well, if this is post Robocop 3 Robocop, then he has good reason...considering how THAT movie turned out. Either that or it was Robocop cosplaying as Captain Amazing (Or whatever that character's name was from the movie "Mystery Men") |
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Post by robnoxious on May 27, 2007 20:30:21 GMT -5
No it was pre Robocop 3 and he was also handing out posters for movies that were totally irrelevant to Robocop like New York Stories and Driving Miss Daisy  |
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Post by Blade Braxton on Apr 25, 2008 15:37:17 GMT -5
Bumping this due to me telling the story of these three assclowns on WC radio again this week.
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