thegigolo
ALF
Leaving the women of the world satisfied one night at a time.
Posts: 1,043
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Post by thegigolo on Apr 13, 2011 11:06:06 GMT -5
I can't believe anybody is defending this. The adult in the situation has to act like an adult. Nothing productive can come from returning in kind the same kind of behavor they were using. Honestly other than "winning" a verbal battle can anyone tell me one positive that this behavor would net? I'm not going to say he wasn't wrong, because he was, but really there comes a point where you have to question what the hell you're supposed to do? He could have reported it (and should have), but that doesn't mean anything would be done. In many ways, adults and teachers are completely handcuffed and, like it or not, some kids aren't going to care if you're calm. They want to to be twats to people and want to do so by picking on people they don't think can respond. Adults have to act like they're adults, but does that necessarily mean they have to condone (whether explicitly or implicitly by inaction) being verbally assaulted by someone just because their voice hasn't dropped? There were much better ways than making racist comments, but I can at least understand the frustration when kids can get away with anything and you're supposed to sit back and take it. In the position he's in, there's in no way a correct way of doing the same thing back to the kids.
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Post by OblivionSorceress on Apr 13, 2011 11:12:40 GMT -5
Honestly, kids/young adults can get away with so much s*** nowadays it's ridiculous. It probably wasn't the best decision to act that way but I'm not going to condemn you for it either like so many others here are ready to do. I know it would of pissed me off too if that were me and I honestly couldn't sit here and say I'd keep my cool cause I don't know if I would. Everyone makes mistakes, the human race isn't perfect and it never will be. For the future just try and go to superiors or parents about the problem first.
Honestly the topic about treatment/discipline of kids really can drive me over the edge. It's one of the topics I am very opinionated and emotional about. It wasn't too long ago that I was in high school (doesn't feel like it to me anyway) so I know what kids are really like. There are good ones but there are some very bad ones who act and think like adults. They don't care about the small stuff, in school suspension, out school suspension, etc. I went to in school suspension for a few days honestly and it was the best thing ever! Hell it was like a freaking party to me. I really wonder sometimes that if they want to act and think like adults then we should discipline them like ones. Show them that in the real world they really can't get away with the s*** their pulling. It's a very rude awakening for kids when they become adults nowadays because they don't realize how things really work. Some people would probably get physical with that kid for the remarks he was making if he were an adult. I'm not saying we should beat the crap out of kids and crazy s*** like that. I'm just saying, we have to do something different about the way we discipline them because our future generations are seriously going down the drain. I'm seriously worried about the future.
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Post by Milkman Norm on Apr 13, 2011 11:54:23 GMT -5
By it's very nature discipline is not the answer. Discipline is punitive and it occurs after the fact. Education and modeling appropriate language, behavior, social skills , etc. is. Only when one is calm and in control can one teach those skills. I don't want anything to think I'm talking about being a push over. As an authority figure you can and should raise and change the tone of your voice when necessary , and you should use any other non-abusive tool you have to show your authority. But remember, if you're an authority figure you have nothing to gain from going to the kids level.
Secondly kids can not behave like adults because their brains have literally not developed the skills necessary to show the all of the consequences of their actions. They act from behaviors they've seen modeled. Again responding in kind has no redeeming value.
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4TheGlory
Vegeta
The Fun One At Parties
Posts: 9,752
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Post by 4TheGlory on Apr 13, 2011 12:27:22 GMT -5
You reacted better then I would have, I probably would've slapped the piss out of the kid.
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Post by Red Impact on Apr 13, 2011 18:08:06 GMT -5
By it's very nature discipline is not the answer. Discipline is punitive and it occurs after the fact. Education and modeling appropriate language, behavior, social skills , etc. is. Only when one is calm and in control can one teach those skills. I don't want anything to think I'm talking about being a push over. As an authority figure you can and should raise and change the tone of your voice when necessary , and you should use any other non-abusive tool you have to show your authority. But remember, if you're an authority figure you have nothing to gain from going to the kids level. Secondly kids can not behave like adults because their brains have literally not developed the skills necessary to show the all of the consequences of their actions. They act from behaviors they've seen modeled. Again responding in kind has no redeeming value. Adolescence is, by nature, the time when kids rebel against authority figures and there's no recourse or options anyone really has to address them, because they're kids. That education, then, mostly falls on deaf ears unless there's a concerted effort from more than the schools, and even then it's an uphill battle. Not to mention the fact that schools have been teaching kids how to act since kindergarten. If kids are rude and vulgar, it's not because they've never heard the message. I agree that there's nothing to be gained by stooping down to their level, I just sympathize with the frustration for having to deal with kids like that. I mean, I'm not calling anyone out here, but I'm beginning to wonder when the last time many people on this forum were in a public school. The system is far from perfect, but at least at my school(a school, mind you, that was incredibly under-funded and short-staffed and also lived in a somewhat intolerant area), any reported case of discrimination(Sexual, Racial, Gender, etc) was taken VERY seriously. And most of the problems with the PSS are, in some way or another, largely our own doing. My school had more of a laizze faire attitude towards stuff. If you didn't have physical complete proof, they wouldn't do anything. So when I had stuff stolen from my locker and some else saw who did it, the school refused to do anything about it. And I'm not that far removed from high school, I don't think. While that's not a discrimination case, if they wouldn't do anything about theft I have a hard time believing they'd do anything if someone was heard using a racial slur.
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Mac
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
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Posts: 16,502
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Post by Mac on Apr 13, 2011 18:16:50 GMT -5
Kids get too much rope these days. If I called a teacher a racial slur id expect to be suspended and when i got home i'd expected to be in solitary confinement for a few months. Everytime an issue comes up on the news these days it seems like the parents blame the school and the teacher and their precious snowflakes cant possibly be at fault. The fact kids think they can get away with that crap is disturbing really.
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