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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 19:49:34 GMT -5
That's two weeks we got those motherf***ers off their game, man! Tonight is where we bring this to a close. Latino Nation gonna run strong like it always do. An' it's gonna come even quicker tonight, 'cuz they handicapped.
I feel like I'm slippin', though. Two weeks and the bitch is back on her feet already?
'ey, don't worry about it. All Christy Hemme's gonna do is slow 'em down. We'd have this locked even if we were stuck with the old model. But the new one...
*The masked female member of LAX enters.*
Way I understand it, she can actually throw down.
That right?
Estan correcto.
Bueno. Right, man?
Yeah, that's right.
Ella no va a caminar afuera.
Now that's some damn music right there.
Then let's go finish this. AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels have had this coming for way too long.
Years, man.
Years. This is some blood feud shit that we need to put down once and for all tonight. So let's get out there and wreck us some gringos, man!
*Homicide exits the locker room, Hernandez attempting to follow him.*
Shawn, esperas.
Eh? 'Sup?
Algo no esta bien con Nelson.
...you think so too, eh?
El acento de ti es mierda.
Si, si...pero, vivia en America por todo su vida. Su acento siempre era mierda.
Aun algo no es bien aqui.
Well, it don't look like it's gonna bite us in the ass anytime soon, chica. If 'Cide's runnin' somethin' behind my back, then I'll deal with it when it comes to it. But for now, we got better things to worry about.
...but for the record, I think you're being paranoid. Plus it don't exactly help your case when you pull that same mask crap he doin', "Salinas."
Ah, callate.
Right. Vamos.
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Post by wwe1993 on Aug 12, 2011 19:50:01 GMT -5
SWERVE!
... I'll admit it got me.
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TMK
Bubba Ho-Tep
The night is dark and full of terrors.
Posts: 627
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Post by TMK on Aug 12, 2011 19:50:56 GMT -5
Wonderful stuff there.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 19:52:01 GMT -5
AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels are preparing backstage when Christy Hemme enters.
Guys, you know I was thinking about this mystery woman that LAX have got.
What about her? She's just someone LAX got to attack you.
Well I was thinking it may be more personal than that. So I made a list of all my enemies.
You have enemies?
Everybody has enemies.
Just...read it.
AJ takes the list from Christy.
Okay, let's see what we've got here. Tara? You mean Lisa?
Yeah, she and I had a little tiff back when we were both up north.
Well that was a while ago. And I think she's too busy with her playhouse to worry about you.
Wait, what's this name that's crossed out. Tri...
Oh she doesn't matter. I considered her before I remembered she was tied down up north.
Well that rules her out.
And this other one. What does that say, Melanie? Milena?
Ditto.
If your talking about who I think you are then she has issues of the personal nature anyway. Like recent motherhood.
How do you know that?
Let's just say we fellow ROH guys keep in touch.
Wait, Awesome Kong is on this list.
Yeah, I forgot to cross her name off too.
Same reason?
Let's just say that karma is a bitch.
And let's not forget the fact that Kong is nearly 6 foot tall and well over 200 pounds while your attacker is, well, not.
Alright, let me see. Ah, Angelina Love and Velvet Sky. At least they actually work here.
So it's possible, right?
I dunno. As far as I know Angelina is out with an injury. She's too tall to be this mystery woman anyway.
What about Velvet?
Too white. What, she is?
I guess.
Besides, she's blond. You're mystery attacker is a brunette.
So that just leave this last name here. Salinas is that?
Yeah, you remember her. She used to hang out with LAX before.
And you didn't think to put her name at the top of the list?
Okay then, she's our prime suspect.
And how exactly does that help us?
Well Christy has wrestled her before, right?
Right.
So she has experience dealing with her.
Yeah. Okay, I gotta go and get ready. I'll see you guys later.
Christy leaves.
AJ, hasn't it occured to you that it could be someone not on that list.
Of course it does.
Then what the hell was that? You're supposed to be talking her out of it, not encouraging her.
I've tried to talk her out of it. She won't listen. At least this way she'll be safe on the apron. Just do me a favor and don't tag her in. Whatever happens.
I hope you know what you're doing, man.
So do I.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2011 19:52:13 GMT -5
That was amazing, Lodi. I actually expected you to cash in tonight.
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Aug 12, 2011 19:55:03 GMT -5
I wanted to cash in so bad. But I had the feeling that it was too early to do so.
But I figure if I keep writing up stuff like this, it'll be worth the wait for me.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 19:56:19 GMT -5
JB: The following six person tag match is set for one fall. Introducing first, Homicide, Hernadez and Salinas, LAX!
JB: And their opponents, Christy Hemme and AJ Styles and Christopher Daniels, The Phenomenal Angels!
Tenay: So apparently LAX’s mystery woman in the returning Salinas. West: Who? Tenay: You know, Salinas. West: I don’t remember her. Tenay: Well she’s back and apparently she’s after Christy Hemme.
Phenomenal Angels & Christy Hemme v LAX 4 votes 15 minutes
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Post by The Tank on Aug 12, 2011 19:58:09 GMT -5
I don't know if I actually wanna win this one.
Eh, screw it. Homicide hits Daniels with the Angel's Wings.
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TMK
Bubba Ho-Tep
The night is dark and full of terrors.
Posts: 627
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Post by TMK on Aug 12, 2011 19:58:18 GMT -5
Styles with the springboard punch to Salinas.
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,183
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Aug 12, 2011 19:58:28 GMT -5
Christy dropkicks Salinas as a voice shouts from the distance.
YOU'RE STILL A SLUT!
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Post by wwe1993 on Aug 12, 2011 20:00:57 GMT -5
Christy slaps Salinas
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 20:11:31 GMT -5
Hernandez beats down AJ for a while, then he throws AJ to the outside but AJ lands on the apron. AJ comes back in with the springboard forearm. Homicide tries to intervene with AJ hits the PELE! AJ makes the tag to Daniels. Daniels then hits a crossbody to Hernandez!
1…
2…
Homicide breaks it up. Homicide catches Daniels with the Gringo Cutter!
1…
2…
AJ makes the save. Daniels hits the Angel’s Wings to Homicide. AJ hits an enziguri to Hernandez. Daniel goes for the BME but gets crotched by Hernandez. Homicide makes the tag to Salinas. Referee Brian Hebner orders Daniels out and he reluctantly makes the tag to Christy. Salina tells Christy to bring it and Christy slaps her across the face. Salinas fires back with a right hand. Christy hits a right of her own but Slinas cuts her off with a knee to the gut. Salinas whips Christy into the ropes but Christy comes back with a spear. Christy goes up, looking for the FFG, but Salinas moves out of the way. Salinas then gets Christy in a headlock and signals for a bulldog but Christy reaches up and pulls the mask off Salinas.
Tenay: That’s not Salinas, that’s Venus! West: Who?
Christy as able to take advantage and roll Venus up as Daniels and Styles cut off Homicide and Hernandez.
1…
2…
3!
JB: Here are your winners, The Phenomenal Angels and Christy Hemme!
AJ, Daniels and Christy celebrate up the aisle as LAX fumes in the ring.
Tenay: Well the deception didn’t work as Christy, AJ and Dnaiels get the win here. West: Who the hell would hide under a mask to impersonate a member of LAX? Tenay: Who indeed.
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,183
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Aug 12, 2011 20:15:11 GMT -5
*cricks neck*
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 20:17:22 GMT -5
Mr. Anderson sits in his locker room, staring at the camera.
I think it's time for me to explain something to you people.
For the last few weeks, you haven't heard much from ol' Kenny boy.
And that's because it seems to me that everybody thinks the only thing I'm good for is coming out with a microphone and being snarky.
And don't get me wrong, I'm pretty good at that.
But for some reason, everyone has forgotten about the fact that I'm wrestling for the TNA Championship tonight.
And that includes Samoa Joe and Brutus Magnus.
Boys, you two have been going at each other like you're the only two people in this company that matter, Magnus, you have your little henchmen kissing your ass day after day telling you that everything you do is wonderful and magical and you're just the bestest and most special little boy in the world.
And Joe, you pretend to be all about taking down Magnus and proving that your no nonsense wrestling will beat Magnus's showmanship and distractions, but you're still the guy who had Jeff Jarrett practically making sweet verbal love to you in order to convince you to put on your tights and grace us with your massive presence.
And then there's ol' Ken, the forgotten man, the one everyone's already written off as the filler, the sawdust in the hot dog, the white stuff in the Twinkie, the Texas Toast in the Chicken Finger basket.
The reason I haven't been getting on the stick is that I've been busy studying tape and learning all about Joe and Magnus's strengths and weaknesses.
For example, Magnus is deathly afraid of toothpaste and Joe isn't paying attention right now because he's still thinking about the Chicken Fingers I mentioned a minute ago.
But the fact is, I could sit here and make jokes at their expense all night, and I mean it, because it's really easy with those two, but the time for joking is over.
I hope I have everyone's attention, but even if I don't, after tonight, Joe and Magnus will know who I am.
I'll be the one standing over their battered and beaten bodies, holding MY TNA Championship, and then they'll always remember the name of . . .
MISSSSSSSSSTAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
ANNNNNNNNDERRRRRRRRRRRSONNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!
Anderson.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 20:18:40 GMT -5
*The 'Tron cuts to a locker room, the cameraman entering to find Samoa Joe tying up his boots.*
So now Magnus isn't even content to let me win matches he's not even in. If anyone anywhere needed any more proof that Brutus Magnus is afraid of Samoa Joe, highlights are on the site. Watch in amazement as our esteemed World Champion screws over the rightful champion two weeks in a row.
But goin' on like this, I sound like I'm trying to make myself the victim here. I don't care one way or another who's sympathizing with me. He clubbed me with the belt and he jumped me from behind. Big damn deal. The fact is, it doesn't matter how he did it, but the last two weeks he's been the man standing tall. Just like at Slammiversary.
No more.
No.
More.
You're not getting a Samoa Joe who's too pissed off to think straight like you did last week. You're not getting a Samoa Joe stupid enough to put his trust in someone who's after the same one title. You're getting the champion you stole the title from. You're getting the beast that makes the toughest men in wrestling quiver with fear.
Magnus...you are not walking out of here tonight. You are gonna bleed. You are gonna suffer. You are gonna wish you had never been stupid enough to bring down my wrath. Because tonight, you don't just get beat. You don't even get destroyed. Tonight, you get the kind of beating you spend the rest of your life regretting that you accepted this match. If I'm feeling generous, you get to leave on a stretcher. But don't count on that, son. You don't even deserve hospital treatment.
And Mr. Anderson. You actually made it here. I'll give you props for that, Kenny. But you didn't have the title stolen from you, so I'll say it again: you want a real title shot, you'll get it from me down the road when Magnus is finished. It's that simple. If you keep trying to get involved, you're going to get hurt. And if you get lucky enough to leave here in one piece, you damn sure are not leaving here with my title.
That's not bragging, that's not boasting, that's just cold, hard facts. That title is coming back where it belongs tonight. And for Magnus, Anderson...by now, I shouldn't even have to say it.
Joe's Gonna Kill You.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 20:20:13 GMT -5
Rated ShaRKO is backstage. Shark Boy is holding a mic, while JKO…
Is just there.
Ladies and gentlemen, my guest at this time is the TNA World Heavyweight Champion, Brutus Magnus!
Magnus enters, a big smile on his face.
Hello there, chaps. Good to see you both.
And likewise to you, sir. Or is that Champ?
Haha! Champ will do nicely. It’s a title I intend to keep for a long time, you know…
Which brings us to the point of this interview. Tonight, you have been forced, under the most dubious of circumstances, to defend your Championship against Mr. Anderson, who you beat last month, and Samoa Joe, who you won the title from in the first place. What are your thoughts, Champ?
Well, as I’ve noted numerous times, neither man deserves to be facing me tonight. Mr. Anderson, my thoughts on you are well documented as well. I personally find you to be garbage in the ring, though I will admit you can cut one hell of a promo. But how you held the TNA Legends Championship for four months is a mystery to me.
As for Samoa Joe, it has nothing to do with your ability. I have nothing but respect for you. In the ring. Out of the ring, that’s another story. I believe the words, slob, fat, rude, bully, and prima donna all apply.
The fact is Joe, you LEFT THE COMPANY. And when you did that, YOU FORFEITED YOUR REMATCH CLAUSE! Is it really that difficult of a concept to understand? Simply put, you bullied your way back into this company and you know it. You forced Jeff Jarrett to grant you an immediate title match before you would sign that contract. Don’t bother to dispute it, the evidence is all there on tape.
So what it all boils down to is I’m being forced to defend my title against a piece of garbage and a big fat ugly bully!
Hey Bruti! Question for ya, man!
Sorry J, we’re not taking questions from the audience tonight. It’s a one man interview show here, buddy.
Brutus, you claim Joe left the company, but some, including Joe and Jeff Jarrett, claim he was fired by Eric Bischoff. Would you care to comment?
Well, I can neither verify or deny those claims. If he was fired, it serves him right. All the talent in the world can’t help you when you piss off management. I’m sure if Eric did fire him, it was for a damn good reason.
And regarding Mr. Anderson, what do think it is that causes promoters to grant him title shot after title shot?
It’s what I said before. The man’s a great talker. He has the uncanny ability to sell himself, and make people THINK that he’s great. That’s the reason he’s always found himself near the top of the card everywhere he goes.
On iMPACT Tuesday night, the final shot was you standing over Samoa Joe and Mr. Anderson, after having brutally laid them out by way of a belt shot to the face. Should we expect similar tonight?
Well, yes and no. You can certainly plan on seeing me stand over the fallen carcasses of Joe and Anderson, but knocking them senseless with the Championship again? I’d like to think I can do better…
Oh of course. But what if by chance, the match were to turn ugly? How would you respond?
Make no mistake, Shark Boy. I value, I treasure this title. I will do anything to keep it. If “anything” means resorting to underhanded techniques, then so be it. It’s not like they can disqualify in a three way match anyhow.
Quite true! Quite true!
Shut up.
OK Brutus, we need to wrap this up. Any last comments?
I am without a doubt, the face of this company right now. Hell, for the last two years, I've carried this company on my damn back! More TNA Championships than anybody else, I dominated most of 2009 and the first half of 2010.
Anyone I've been put in the ring with, I beat them. AJ Styles, Petey Williams, Samoa Joe, Mr. Anderson, Abyss, Sting, the list goes on. Nobody else in this company is even in my league, yet still people doubt me.
Anyone who still thinks my title win was a fluke, that I don’t deserve this title, I want you to watch this match very closely. When I pin Joe’s shoulders to the mat, one. Two. Three. Will it still be a fluke then?
I would think not. Brutus, thank you for your time.
You are very welcome, Sharky.
Mike, Don? Back to you.
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,183
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Aug 12, 2011 20:21:27 GMT -5
*cracks knuckles*
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2011 20:22:13 GMT -5
Damn, everyone brought their a-game tonight.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Aug 12, 2011 20:23:19 GMT -5
JB: The following contest is a triple threat match and it is for the TNA World Heavyweight Championship!
Tenay: Is was at Slammiversary that Samoa Joe lost the World Championship to Brutus Magnus. It’s taken him two long months but he gets his rematch tonight. West: Well Joe is certainly intense but will that be enough?
Tenay: Last month at Victory Road Mr Anderson arguably had the world title won until the interference of Rated SharKO. West: Well there’s no Shrak Boy and JKO tonight, Anderson can have no excuses.
Tenay: Our reigning champion faces his toughest challenge yet. West: Well if anyone can survive this, Brutus Magnus can. Tenay: Let’s throw it to JB for the official introductions.
JB: Introducing the challengers first, from the Isle of Samoa, weighing 280 pounds, “The Samoan Submission Machine” Samoa Joe!
JB: Next, from Green Bay, Wisconsin, weighing 243 pounds, Mr Anderson!
JB: And finally, from the United Kingdom, weighing 240 pounds, he is the reigning and defending TNA World Heavyweight Champion, Brutus Magnus!
TNA World Heavyweight Championship Brutus Magnus v Mr Anderson v Samoa Joe 5 votes 20 minutes
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,183
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Aug 12, 2011 20:23:22 GMT -5
Thank you.
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