FAWA Promo Thread #15

[Head Detective Aaron Enigma]

Is anyone listening to this lunatic? He thinks he is the General Manger or something doesn't he? He thinks that title gives him some sort of power? You clearly have it all wrong Gus, so let me clear things up for you.

The Hollywood Enigmas...hell none of the tag teams in FAWA have to prove anything to you or you psycho brother. If we want to face you, it's going to happen, and we'll gladly take those tag team titles from you.

Secondly, why would Seth and Mulligan accept such a crazy match that would jeopardize their health heading into their big matches at the next PPV? That just sounds like something completely stupid.

I know what is going on. This is all a campaign to show the world how amazing you are, because you finally realized that nobody believes you. No one except you, Shaelin and psychopath thinks you are worthy to hold that Heavyweight title. You feel the need to constantly prove yourself to the rest of us, but we already know the truth.

If Hayden wants to be in this tag team match, I'll be there to make sure the Hollywood Enigmas win, but I think everyone knows that we don't have to stoop to such a match to earn a title shot.

Understand this Gus. Hayden's gonna take that Heavyweight title from you. The Hollywood Enigmas will take the Tag Team titles from you. And as you say...there's nothing anybody can do about it.

[Gus Richlen: Ruffian]

In other words, you don't want to earn your shot.

Then you're out of the match. And that match is the only way anyone is getting a shot.

You and your little buddy should enjoy your delusions while you still can.

[Head Detective Aaron Enigma]

Feb 28, 2013 20:45:03 GMT -5 Gus Richlen: Ruffian said:

In other words, you don't want to earn your shot.

Then you're out of the match. And that match is the only way anyone is getting a shot.

You and your little buddy should enjoy your delusions while you still can.

Oh I'm sorry, did I hurt the psycho's feelings?

Listen buddy, what have you done to earn anything around here? Where are your long title reigns? Where are your signature wins? You think you are in the same league as me? How about instead on Niteraw I teach you a lesson about just how far above you I really am?

I'll teach you a valuable lesson about opening your mouth when you have nothing intelligent to say.

[Gus Richlen: Ruffian]

Feb 28, 2013 20:49:58 GMT -5 Head Detective Aaron Enigma said:

Feb 28, 2013 20:45:03 GMT -5 Gus Richlen: Ruffian said:

In other words, you don't want to earn your shot.

Then you're out of the match. And that match is the only way anyone is getting a shot.

You and your little buddy should enjoy your delusions while you still can.

Oh I'm sorry, did I hurt the psycho's feelings?

Listen buddy, what have you done to earn anything around here? Where are your long title reigns? Where are your signature wins? You think you are in the same league as me? How about instead on Niteraw I teach you a lesson about just how far above you I really am?

I'll teach you a valuable lesson about opening your mouth when you have nothing intelligent to say.

So saying that if you don't want to earn your shot, you don't get a shot is considered unintelligent. Yet you want everything handed to you on a silver platter. That's just not going to happen. And the more arrogant you are about it, the less likely any of us are going to be to bend to your demands.

[Mr. Socko's Brother]

*Ryan Blood is backstage, his face covered in dried blood, his forehead bandaged. He sticks his face right up against the camera*

You said you would break me, you little s*** stain.
You failed.

I said I'd be orgasmically happy after I finished with you in that ring.

[screaming]I WAS RIGHT!

*Ryan lets out a long, satisfied sigh and grins ear to ear*

Oh, all the pain, it was worth it, Richlen, it still is worth it, because I hurt you just as bad and exposed you to the world! All of your loser fans see that you aren't as invincible as you think you are!

And you have to live with it, Richlen; you have to live with knowing that you got your chance to back up your big talk and you couldn't, because Ryan Blood is better than you, Richlen.

The Blood Knight is tougher than the Predator Knight.

But Marshall Wesley Coventry, you kept me from making the night really special, because after what Richlen did to me all those months ago the very least owed him was to take that blowtorch and start burning him alive, inch by inch, with him helpless to stop me!

Oh god, that would have been so sweet....AND YOU RUINED IT!!! YOU STOPPED ME!

Now I owe you, Marshall, just like I owe your brother! I owe you the kind of pain that would make the ninth level of Hell seem like a relaxing goddamn bath!

I deserve to get you in that ring. The General deserves to get you in that ring. I deserve to get Richlen in that ring again. The General deserves a piece of him too.

Because there is one thing you cannot deny, either of you: you may have dismissed the General of the Monkey Army as a joke before, Marshall, and you may have been CERTAIN you were going to decimate me, Gussy, but in the ring both of you lost to both of us! Ryan Blood pinned Gus Richlen 1-2-3! The General of the Monkey Army took everything Marshall Wesley Coventry could hit him with, and still knocked Coventry the F*** out with the Monkey's Paw and tossed him out of the ring like so much garbage before scoring the pinfall, never mind that he had to share the victory with Flynn!

As the winners we are, we deserve our title match against Transgression & Redemption! Do you get to dictate terms? NO! Do you get to book matches? NO! Do you get to decide who your challengers are? NO!

If the powers that be in the FAWA have any intelligence, the team that faces you two will be the team that you want no part of if you're smart: US.

We will beat the two of you again as a team, we will take your gold, and at the end of the night you'll go from being a double champion to a single champion, Richlen! And after Michael Hayden takes your last remaining championship away from you, the fans will see you for what you are, and they'll turn on you! Just like I predicted on my first night back! And shortly after that, there will be NO MORE Gus Richlen!
Whether you quit because things aren't going you way like the...oh, what's the expression you love?....whiny little bitch you are, or whether I force you to quit, you will be GONE! FOREVER!

[Head Detective Aaron Enigma]

I guess what I am saying just goes right over your head. I am saying that your brother didn't earn his Inter-Forum title shot against me. Why should I have to earn one against him?

Let me explain something, Marshall. I've never had anything handed to me in this company. I have had to claw my way to the top and scavenge just to remain. Every title that I have held, I held because I earned it. I don't get things handed to me on a silver platter as you said. Yet when I look around here, I see people getting handed things left and right.

Don't you think that's a little unfair? I mean sure we hate each other, but why is it that Aaron Enigma, one of the top men in the company, never gets any breaks, when your brother has gotten several. Tell me what Gus did to earn his title shot against me, Marshall? He told me that he essentially begged the board of directors to give him the title shot.

I sure hope that I helped to clear things up in your head. If I didn't...well you are a tad crazy, and I'm pretty damn smart.

I don't need to pander to the champions to get what I want, Marshall. I'll get the title shot one way or another, and I don't have to do anything you or Gus say to earn it.

[Gus Richlen: Ruffian]

Congratulations. You just cost yourself and The General your chance. You're out of the match. No title shot for you.

And if you think you're going to destroy us that easily, you are in for the biggest losing battle you have ever suffered through.

And there won't be a single person who'll cry when you fall.

[Mr. Socko's Brother]

Feb 28, 2013 21:12:45 GMT -5 Gus Richlen: Ruffian said:

Congratulations. You just cost yourself and The General your chance. You're out of the match. No title shot for you.

And if you think you're going to destroy us that easily, you are in for the biggest losing battle you have ever suffered through.

And there won't be a single person who'll cry when you fall.

OOC: I'm not going to waste time writing an IC response, because what you just said IC'ly was complete bullshit. You don't get the final say in who you defend against. It's not a difficult concept to grasp for most people. Apparently you can't wrap your head around it because during the time I've been away from FAWA you changed from a reasonable person into something I can't call you if I don't want to risk a ban.

"No title shot for you"...just...you know what? Do what you said and quit. If you're gonna continue to be like this, yes, quit. The fed will be a hell of a lot more fun without your particular brand of bullshit.

[Waffel113]

Feb 28, 2013 21:12:45 GMT -5 Gus Richlen: Ruffian said:

Congratulations. You just cost yourself and The General your chance. You're out of the match. No title shot for you.

And if you think you're going to destroy us that easily, you are in for the biggest losing battle you have ever suffered through.

And there won't be a single person who'll cry when you fall.

... And with that statement, I promptly retract what I said about the video on the last page. Wow... just wow. Echoing what MSB said in the main thread, you aren't the booker. You don't decide who gets to fight you for your title. That's just over the line.

[Gus Richlen: Ruffian]

OOC: It's obvious that there is absolutely nothing I can say or do short of leaving to make everyone happy....

Especially considering that after the heat I took last week I was trying to weaken my gimmick. I'm not trying to offend people. That's not what i'm trying to do. And there's no way I'm going to quit.

But I really don't see what is so wrong with wanting a match o determine who I'm defending the tag belts against.

[Seth Drakin of Monster Crap]

I'll let Dr. Evil make my response



AlthoughI might have said yes if you had not just lost to Ryan Blood.

[Oak: Certified Jade Hater]

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the only time you're going to get a look behind the curtain. At tge man behind the gimmick. Right now, this isn't "Hollywood's Own", this is Michael Hayden, the man from California who f***ing loves professional wrestling. Who has bled for professional wrestling.

If you think I'm going to jeapordize my health, my well-being just a few weeks before my title shot, then you are sorely mistaken. I know Gus Richlen desperately wants to hold onto the titles he never really won in the first place, and hey, good for him. But what he is demanding, and that's the right word, is insane. And I will not partake in it.

A few days ago, I spoke out against Richlen, and I brought up a code amongst the men in the locker room. Simply put, we can beat the hell out of each other, but never do we try and permanently injure one another. We never try and take away someone's career. This business has had too many horror stories of wrestlers retiring due to injuries, and we do our best to protect our own. To make sure that we have a long career in this business.

Double tables matches? They hurt like hell. One wrong move, and we're out with injury. And as for Gus's suggestion about a three way match, why would Seth and MPM agree? MPM fights women nowadays, and Seth won't fight him until Gus loses the title. Last time I checked, being FAWA Champ doesn't make you the CEO or GM around here. The kid can't make matches when he pleases.

So, it is with what little respect I have for you that I say no, the Hollywood Enigmas will not participate in this double tables match. If there's a team that wants to play his games, go right ahead. But I'm a wrestler goddammit, and that means my talking is in the ring. No weapons, no cheating, just the desire to be better.

Aaron and I will get our shot at the belts soon enough, whether Gus Richlen and MWC like it or not. We've earned our place in FAWA, we've earned our shot, and soon enough, we'll get our match.

I guarantee it.

[Mr. Socko's Brother]

Before we take the tag titles--which are no longer the property of Richlen and his loser brother--the two most psychotic men in the FAWA are going to set their sights on the Television Title!

The General of the Monkey Army goes mano-a-mano with Connor Mackenzie for that very belt! It'll be monkey vs. dragon, a fight for the ages!

And I know what you might be thinking: a dragon could just open its mouth and eat a monkey in one bite. But the biggest mistake you could ever make would be to underestimate a monkey! Because from inside the dragon, that monkey will construct tools from the dragon's guts! That monkey will use those tools to take the dragon apart from the inside out, and the dragon won't be able to do anything about it except die! And then, after the digital dragon has been disassembled, the monkey will take a big shit and throw some feces at the corpse, because he's a monkey and that's what he does!

Um, I may have gotten off-track...

Okay, yeah! MEANWHILE, I will be going up against "The Head Detective" Aaron Enigma and Sammy Twister for my own shot at the TV Title!

Now Aaron, there was a time not long ago when I thought the same about everybody. Namely, I thought everybody was scum, even if they pretended otherwise. But it's not easy to hate everybody equally when some of them have the same goals as you do. Both you and Hayden want to make Richlen's life worse, want to see him lose his very last championship, and because of that I can't help but like you guys a little.

Hayden may not like me because he believes in a "wrestlers' code" that I'm pretty sure includes a rule against taking a blowtorch and burning Gus Richlen's eyes right out of their sockets with it!!!

Ahem...let's just agree to disagree on what it's acceptable to do to a turd like Richlen.

Unlike Gus Richlen, I know exactly what kind of man I'll be facing in that ring. Unlike Richlen, I'm not going to call you a "whiny little bitch" and act like you're beneath me. You've won the world title twice. You've won the IF strap three times. And, if me and the General don't bring our A-game, you might beat us to the tag titles.

If I don't bring my solo A-game, you might win that shot at Connor's title.

But you know my accomplishments too, Enigma. You know the titles I've won, the names of the people I've beaten. You know that when you step into the ring with the Blood Knight, you are in for a hell of a fight.

And sorry about your damn luck, my friend, but it's a fight you'll lose.

As for you, Sammy Twister: you just show up. I don't have anything to say to you. You win this match--hell, you win any match--then maybe I'll have something to say to you.

[Mr. Socko's Brother]

*Right after Blood walks off-camera at the end of the last promo, he suddenly walks back into the shot*

Oh, hey! I almost forgot! After I win that Television Championship, apparently I'll be able to make all kinds of decrees and stuff!

So let me get that out of the way early, okay?

As Television Champion, I hereby decree that the people who will compete in a #1 contender's match for a shot at my prestigious title will be...

...Bull Ant, Scott Martin, and my tag partner the General of the Monkey Army! I was going to also put Mad Pirate Mulligan in the match, but then I heard that he bet against the Ravens before the last Superbowl, so f*** him, I decree that he has no right to challenge for my title because I say he doesn't!

But wait! There's more! As champion, I also get to say what kind of match they'll wrestle!

So by the power invested in me by the nice shiny gold belt I won, I hereby decree that these three men will compete in a hardcore match, but not just any hardcore match, no! The ring will be surrounded by a moat, and in the moat will be scores of poisonous jellyfish and ravenous piranhas! And the only way to win will be to shove an opponent's head into the moat so that they get bitten and/or stung!

*Somebody whispers to Blood from off-camera*

What's that? You say that champions don't get to pick and choose their opponents like that? You say that champions don't get to decide the stipulations of #1 contender matches either? You say that only a jackass with an ego the size of at least a dozen universes would think he could do that?

You know what? You're absolutely right. Forget everything I just said. After all, unlike certain other parties I recently dropped on their head and pinned 1-2-3 in the middle of a FAWA ring, I am not like that.

*Blood winks and walks off-camera again*

[Gus Richlen: Ruffian]

All I did was make a proposal and you and others had to blow it far out of proportion. That's why the Board vacated the titles because they were upset over your little overreaction, not because of anything I did. Hell, they thought it was great that I was suggesting three PPVlevel matches like that and risking more than anyone else to be in them!

You KNOW I wasn't having the match set in stone. If I wanted the GM job I'd have taken it a long time ago. Although somehow that'd result in a Lethal Lottery which would somehow end with AJ Lee winning the WWEChampionship.

Once I'm finished with Hayden, I'm going to do what I should have done two years ago and that is end you. Then perhaps you will realize that you should have stayed away....

[Connor Mackenzie]

Oh Ryan, I see you've gone ahead and latched onto someone else to try and ride your way back to the top it would seem. I'll get back to you in a moment...

Onto the more pressing matters at hand. This coming Niteraw I'm competing in not one, but two matches again. Not that I necessarilly mind. Here's my way of thinking. For all of you who would go and say "This is unfair! How can I compete more then once in one night so many times?!" I say to you, suck it up. You know what I take it as. Training. Simple. Hard. Work. I look at it as a means to push myself to my limits and to surpass them. And since Lord of the Ring how many other men have competed more then once in one night then me? So for all of you out there thinking that I'm going to hold back or focus on one match more then another know simply that I do not work like that. Never have. Never will.

Jason, you and I get an oppurtunity to compete against one another for I believe the first time. I'm looking forward to it. You seem like an honourable wrestler and one who's wanting to make a name for himself. I know what that's like. But I also know that the Inter-Forums title is something that has never really presented itself to me as oppurtunity before and I'd be kicking myself if I didn't give it my all to get another shot at Seth and prove to him that the win I had over him at Lord of the Ring was not a fluke. Know that come win or lose, I intend to shake your hand when all is said and done.

And then there was the General. The man who would lead an army of poo-flinging simians. You know, something you might not realize General. At my very first King of Wrestlecrap I was eliminated by your very own wind-up monkey. Now, since then I understand he's gone on to greener pastures but then fact of the matter is you think you can just waltz back in and take this...

*Connor holds up the FAWA TV Title belt.*

You and your new pal Ryan Blood will get it when you pry it from my cold, dead hands. And don't think I won't be expecting your partner to try and interfere. But let me give you some food for thought General. Because I alluded to this at the start.

Ryan Blood is a parasite. Do you know how many groups he has used as a stepping stone to attain the "greatness" he has achieved. The Pantheon, The Equalizers, The Fallen...now the two of you. The future might look nice and bright for you now General but mark my words. Ryan Blood has a dagger always at the ready and he'll stick it your back just as quickly as he will mine if it means him getting what he wants.

So come at me General. You are considered one of the best hardcore champions in this company. Well, I am THE best damn wrestler in this company today. And when all is said and done you and your friend Ryan Blood will see it first hand.

[Head Detective Aaron Enigma]

Connor I must say that you are the embodiment of a star in this company. I just want you to know that our last match won't be the last you see of me around that TV title of yours.

Ryan, you and I...we've had kind of a rocky relationship haven't we? I mean I didn't tell you when I faked my death, and in a match between the both of us you beat me fair and square. However I need that TV title to get back to that Heavyweight title. I think both of us can agree that no matter what happens, the titles that Gus currently has need to be taken so we can show the world his true colors.

I'm looking forward to a good match between two of the best...and some Sam guy.

*Aaron looks to the side at the cameraman.*

What's his name again? Sam Winchester? Isn't that the guy from that "Supernatural" show? Huh well thankfully it wasn't his brother. He's much cooler. Anyhways, can't wait for our match!

[Gus Richlen: Ruffian]

The fans already know my true colors, Enigma. They have for over two years now. They know that I'm not sugar-coated or fake like some people in the business in general, and like all good predators, I've been successful in my career and in my life because I adapt with the changing landscape.

You, on the other hand? I've already exposed you for what you truly are, and that is an insecure, jealous person who feels that he has to have every title and every accolade in the world in order to feel like you're somebody. And quite frankly, that is sad.

Hayden will not take the World Championship from me. Neither will Ryan Blood. Neither will you. The Predator Knight has no natural enemies, and I've already proven that against you THREE STRAIGHT TIMES. There's only room for one on top of the food chain, and that one is and will continue to be ME.

[Seth Drakin of Monster Crap]

Greed............Envy. It's always a problem that I have had to deal with in my opponents.

Just like with the situation of one Gus Richlen, both of the men in the finals may be going for my Interforums Title while being TV Champion at the same time. Greed is a huge problem for me as I have always been one who has not been of the desiring nature towards having more belts. I never really cared for being a double champion or a triple champion.

That lack of greed is why in the end, I am better than everyone else and why in the end, I will always be better than anyone else. Conner and Jason, you can feel safe that your time is not coming yet so I will not get involved in your match. Instead, I will scout like the person that I am.

[General Adam]

Mar 3, 2013 15:55:47 GMT -5 Connor Mackenzie said:

Oh Ryan, I see you've gone ahead and latched onto someone else to try and ride your way back to the top it would seem. I'll get back to you in a moment...

Onto the more pressing matters at hand. This coming Niteraw I'm competing in not one, but two matches again. Not that I necessarilly mind. Here's my way of thinking. For all of you who would go and say "This is unfair! How can I compete more then once in one night so many times?!" I say to you, suck it up. You know what I take it as. Training. Simple. Hard. Work. I look at it as a means to push myself to my limits and to surpass them. And since Lord of the Ring how many other men have competed more then once in one night then me? So for all of you out there thinking that I'm going to hold back or focus on one match more then another know simply that I do not work like that. Never have. Never will.

Jason, you and I get an oppurtunity to compete against one another for I believe the first time. I'm looking forward to it. You seem like an honourable wrestler and one who's wanting to make a name for himself. I know what that's like. But I also know that the Inter-Forums title is something that has never really presented itself to me as oppurtunity before and I'd be kicking myself if I didn't give it my all to get another shot at Seth and prove to him that the win I had over him at Lord of the Ring was not a fluke. Know that come win or lose, I intend to shake your hand when all is said and done.

And then there was the General. The man who would lead an army of poo-flinging simians. You know, something you might not realize General. At my very first King of Wrestlecrap I was eliminated by your very own wind-up monkey. Now, since then I understand he's gone on to greener pastures but then fact of the matter is you think you can just waltz back in and take this...

*Connor holds up the FAWA TV Title belt.*

You and your new pal Ryan Blood will get it when you pry it from my cold, dead hands. And don't think I won't be expecting your partner to try and interfere. But let me give you some food for thought General. Because I alluded to this at the start.

Ryan Blood is a parasite. Do you know how many groups he has used as a stepping stone to attain the "greatness" he has achieved. The Pantheon, The Equalizers, The Fallen...now the two of you. The future might look nice and bright for you now General but mark my words. Ryan Blood has a dagger always at the ready and he'll stick it your back just as quickly as he will mine if it means him getting what he wants.

So come at me General. You are considered one of the best hardcore champions in this company. Well, I am THE best damn wrestler in this company today. And when all is said and done you and your friend Ryan Blood will see it first hand.

I will give you credit where credit is due. I remember when you first started here and now to see you climb the ranks in the FAWA is amazing.
You are a damn good wrestler Connor, but don't sell me short. In the art of war a solider must adapt to his surroundings to survive. A monkey can't change the color of its fur but I can change the camouflage on my clothes.
Get ready for war Connor.