Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,412
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Dec 21, 2012 17:14:27 GMT -5
Austin Aries, the MV3, will take a match.
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 21, 2012 17:52:03 GMT -5
How does this card sit with everybody?
Alex Shelley vs Zema Ion (With Joey Ryan on Commentary) Mickie James vs Hamada vs ODB vs Taylor Wilde (#1 Contendership for the TNA Women's Title.) Austin Aries, Kenny King, and Robbie E vs Brian Kendrick, Rob Van Dam, and Jeff Hardy (X Division Xmas Xtravaganza!) Devon and Matt Morgan vs Kid Kash and Sam Shaw (#1 Contendership for the TNA Tag Titles) Abyss vs Godderz Samoa Joe vs Mark Haskins
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 21, 2012 17:53:53 GMT -5
Whoever's writing the show, just make sure you PM me when you're writing the Ion/Shelley match so I'll remember about the commentary.
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 22, 2012 15:12:06 GMT -5
I may have to do some shopping tomorrow night so Impact may be earlier than usual so I can get it done. I should know more by tomorrow in regards to exactly what time it will be.
I'll be working on the show today though.
I also have nothing promo-wise right now. If people would like I guess we can postpone the show though that might set us off our planned schedule.
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Post by MikeyMania on Dec 23, 2012 7:52:10 GMT -5
When is the next show meant to be? Tonight?
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2012 11:14:24 GMT -5
Sent in a promo, Mr B.
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 11:48:50 GMT -5
When is the next show meant to be? Tonight? Indeed, that was the plan. I won't be running it until seven though. (or six for me) So anybody who wants to submit some promos has plenty of time.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2012 12:16:35 GMT -5
What timezone are you, B?
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 13:05:51 GMT -5
What timezone are you, B? I'm Central.
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 16:44:14 GMT -5
Okay, just a little under two and half hours and we kick things off.
And it looks like we'll be pushing the next pay per view back from the 30th. I'm still not sure on an exact date though since Jono and I haven't discussed it. So that gives everybody more time to plan stuff for that.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2012 16:48:34 GMT -5
12GMT, I suppose I can stick around for most of it.
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 18:58:44 GMT -5
Okay folks, it's SHOW TIME... in two minutes.
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 19:03:15 GMT -5
Tenay: Welcome everyone once again to Impact! Mike Tenay here alongside my broadcast colleagues, Hermie Sadler and Simon Diamond!
Sadler: It's great to be back here again, Mike. Looking forward to the holidays?
Tenay: As a matter of fact I am! In fact once this show goes off the air I'll be heading back home to spend some time with my family.
Diamond: Eh, don't talk to me about the holidays. I don't like em. Too much commercialism and stuff.
Sadler: Well Simon, I'm sorry to hear that. Then I guess you don't want this gift that I bought for you!
Diamond: ...A gift?! Oh, what am I saying? Christmas is just fine with me! Commercialism is awesome! So let's have it.
Sadler: Nope, not until later on in the show.
Diamond: Bah, fine. But this better not be a tease!
Tenay: Moving on, let's focus on the night that lies ahead. We've got six matches for you here tonight. Abyss and Samoa Joe are in action for starters.
Sadler: Samoa Joe has been quiet as of late, but judging from his past reputation that's doesn't mean he's slacking.
Diamond: And that big oaf Abyss is in action too, taking on KCW's "attache" Godderz. This is Godderz first official match in awhile. We'll see how bad he can clobber that masked freak.
Tenay: Then we've got a match with pay per view implications! Two teams get a chance to compete for the tag team titles as Eric Young's goon squad, Matt Morgan and Devon, go one on one with the unorthodox team of Kid Kash and Sam Shaw.
Sadler: We've also got the women's title match number one contender match tonight. Unfortunately due to a sustained injury, Tara was pulled from the match. However in her place is another woman more than worthy of a shot in Taylor Wilde! She joins ODB, Hamada, and Mickie James to see who earns a shot at Brooke Adams!
Tenay: Plus we've got a special treat tonight. Since we're not the only show celebrating the holidays with special matches, we've decided to have the first ever X-Division Xmas Xtravaganaza! Two teams of prime athletes all competing. And the winners will be granted a special Christmas bonus courtesy of Bischoff and Flair!
Diamond: But folks, let's not forget the main event. The All-Star Zema Ion takes on the King of Reject TV, Alex Shelley! It's a battle of number one contenders! Only one of em can build his momentum. Question is whose it gonna be?
Tenay: All that and more tonight on Impact! ------------------------------
*A bar is shown*
Patrons are shown mingling around, as Samoa Joe sits by the bar, drink and cigar in hand.
Tonight marks my return to Impact..It's not something I'm happy about. I was perfectly content to sit at home and..I dunno, watch porn or something. TNA was paying me to do that. But now they want me to come back for a match, I have to work for my money now. Bullshit. With all I've done for this company since 2005, I should be told "Joe, Joe. Please go home and do f*** all. We love you." But no, they don't. They never have. It's a disgrace, it is. So yeah, TNA. I'll come as much as my contact says. No more. And don't try and pull any of that "Don't win you're fired" crap. That's unfair firing. f***ing *****, hope you're f****** happy.
(First match in five minutes.)
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 19:07:53 GMT -5
JB: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!
Current in the ring, from Faringdon, Oxon, weighing in at 180 pounds, Mark Haskins!
Diamond: Dead man walking.
Sadler: Can't you come up with any original lines of your own!
Diamond: Long as they pay me I don't have to!
JB: And his opponent, from the Isle of Samoa, weighing in at 280 pounds, Samoa Joe!
Tenay: Samoa Joe has been sitting back these past few weeks, biding his time. But tonight he's ready to return and make his mark!
Diamond: Oh, he's gonna make a mark alright. And poor Haskins is the one he's gonna make it on!
Samoa Joe vs Mark Haskins 10 Minutes
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 19:08:27 GMT -5
Mark Haskins with a hint, hint, hint!
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 19:18:28 GMT -5
Samoa Joe just stares Haskins down, not even budging. Haskins walks right up to him and slaps him across the face!
Joe doesn't budge, staring him down as he smacks him once more. Haskins bounces off the ropes, charging back in right into a blatent low blow kick! Haskin's eyes begin to water as he drops to the mat, clutching his crotch, Joe just looking down at him.
This of course leads to referee Brian Stiffler calling for the bell.
JB: Here is your winner, by disqualification, Mark Haskins!
Sadler: What in the world was Joe thinking?! He just threw his redebut match away just like that!
Diamond: I guess Joe didn't feel like fighting tonight. Hey, if you don't feel like fighting someone then why waste the time?
Sadler: I don't know what to make of this. Samoa Joe is back... but this is not the same guy we've seen before. What in the world is going through his head?
Tenay: It's a mystery for sure. And speaking of mysteries we have a video we recieved earlier to show you. Sooooo... to the back! -------------------------------------
Abyss stands behind a chain-link fence in the back, shadowed as usual. His forearms rest against the fence, and his eyes stare coldly out from behind the chains, voice echoing menacingly.
Hernandez was the first to fall in my path of destruction...next, it will be you, Godderz...and soon, very soon, your overlord, your MASTER KCW will be crushed under my hands, the Television Title my prize for turning him to dust.
He chuckles, lightly tapping his fists on the chain-link fence as ne glares out into the camera lens.
You're just like I was, Godderz. You're muscle. Dumb muscle. That's the difference...you're dumb muscle. I know I have more intellect than I was ever given credit for. I may have been the...crazy one in the family, but that doesn't mean I was dumb. I just let people tell me that...I let them dictate WHO I WAS. No more.
Abyss seethes through his teeth as his fingers curl around the links in the fence. He pulls back again, shaking his head in dismay.
So you, Godderz, are going to be an EXAMPLE. You'll be how I show KCW what is coming. Make your peace with whatever you pray to. I'm a Monster, Godderz. I'm a freak. And I have NO mercy. Your blood will stain my hands...this is my Christmas present to myself. Your misery, KCW's fear...and my sweet satisfaction. Ho...ho...ho...
He chuckles darkly, turning and walking away as his hand rakes along the fence, rattling the links with his passing. ---------------------
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm here with Godderz whose getting set to take on Abyss tonight. Godderz, it's no secret that you have a vested interest in this match. Do you think you can handle the monstrous Abyss?
Godderz glances to the left, then the right, then simply flexes his muscles. He then walks off screen.
Ummmm... well that was the shortest interview ever. Back to you, Mi...
Now, now, my dear tralop. Didn't you notice me standing right over here? Honestly, such disrespect towards YOUR TNA Television Champion. Then again I hardly expect proper manners from a lush like you.
KCW walks into view, shaking his head in disappoint.
Christine, you shouldn't worry about asking my attache about anything. His opinions are irrelevant as long as I employ him. Godderz is paid, and paid well I might add, to do whatever it is I desire. Whether that be mixing drinks, driving me around the golf course, providing a sympathetic ear, or showing frankenstein projects gone awry their imminent futures.
Abyss... what a bizarre name. Sounds like something more befitting one of those detestable goths. Do you think that I'm scared of you? Do you think I'm afraid that you walk around in a halloween costume all year round growling and snarling and saying you're going to hurt everyone you see? Well, dear boy, that's not how it's going to work.
I don't see a fearsome monster when I look at you. No, instead I see a deeply disturbed man in serious need of psychiatric attention; I see a demented, unclean mental patient who obviously has no idea just how much of a raving lunatic he comes off of. I see... my next victim in my trek to becoming the greatest TNA Television Champion in the history of the belt!
You see, tonight I will be taking a front row seat in my lavish locker room as I watch Godderz beat you from pillar to post, I will look on and admire the view as he crushes your skull between his powerful fingers, and I will laugh as you writhe there on the mat, struggling to rise to your feet as you endure the crippling pain sweeping throughout your body!
Abyss, tonight Godderz and I will ensure that you don't make it to Final Resolution! When we get done you'll be wishing you crawl right back to that hospital bed you emerged from! Of that you can be most certain!
KCW smirks and strokes under his chin before exiting the scene as we cut to commercial.
(Next match in 5 minutes also.)
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 19:24:17 GMT -5
JB: The following contest is scheduled for one fall!
JB: Introducing first, from Tampa, Florida, weighing in at 220 pounds, Godderz!
Tenay: We haven't really seen Godderz in the ring as of late, but I have a feeling he's more than capable of giving Abyss a fight here tonight.
Diamond: KCW apparently pays Godderz a pretty hefty sum. Obviously the musclebound freak is gonna earn his keep here tonight!
JB: And his opponent, from Parts Unknown, weighing in at 350 pounds, Abyss!
Sadler: Last week Abyss really made an impression as he qualified for a Television title shot by unseating Roode's own henchman, Hernandez.
Diamond: I still say it was a total fluke.
Sadler: Well then, why don't you go tell Abyss that to his face?
Diamond: ...No thanks. I like having all of my limbs.
Tenay: Tonight KCW is obviously looking to soften Abyss up before his next title defense. The question is will it be enough?
Abyss vs Godderz 10 Minutes
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 19:25:15 GMT -5
Abyss with yet another hint.
That's the last one for tonight though.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 23, 2012 19:31:54 GMT -5
Natural! Mickie promo incoming! Look out!
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Dec 23, 2012 19:36:10 GMT -5
Godderz clobbers Abyss over the back with clubbing blows, hunching the hulking beast of a man over. He bounces off the ropes and takes him down with a Polish Hammer, dropping him onto his back!
1!
Abyss powers out, sending Godderz sailing! He stumbles back to his feet, Abyss grabbing him as he approaches and hefting him onto his shoudersl, dropping him with some Shock Treatment!
Godderz arches off the mat, sitting up in pain. Not done yet, Abyss yanks him back to his feet and sends him off the ropes, taking him up for the Black Hole Slam! He plants Godderz into the canvas, hooking the leg!
1!
2!
3!
JB: Here is your winner... Aby...
But before he can celebrate, KCW slides into the ring and bashes Abyss across the back with a nine-iron! The monster drops down to his knees, KCW hitting him a few more times before sitting on his back and applying a modified camel clutch as he chokes the monster with the weapon!
Tenay: KCW with the sneak attack! This whole match was nothing more than a smoke screen!
Sadler: Godderz was nothing more than a lamb to the slaughter! And now KCW is taking advantage of the weakened Abyss!
Abyss however arches back to his feet, lifting KCW high onto his shoulders and falling back, driving him into the canvas! KCW immediately scrambles out of the ring, grabbing his title and making his way back up the ramp, fury in his eyes.
Diamond: How the hell did he get up from that?! This freak isn't human!
Tenay: Abyss showing KCW that it'll take more than a sneak attack to get a leg up on him! KCW has got his work cut out for him in the near future. But up next two tag teams have a shot to earn a chance to face the champions, Magnus and Doug Williams. Who will it be? --------------------
We head backstage where Devon, Morgan, Sting, and Eric Young are sitting. Eric Young holds Sting's baseball bat and has a sick smile on his face.
Sting starts off.
See. Doesn't that feel right? Don't you want to just take that bat and swing away at Joey Ryan.
Young smirks.
I like it. But it isn't enough. Joey Ryan is too much of a challenge. He took me to the limit at Bound for Glory and I'm just not ready...
You don't have to be ready. Not yet. This is only the first basic steps. When I'm through with you, you'll be ready for Magnum. Don't you worry about that.
Sting turns to Morgan and Devon.
Now you two. You are what I need. I need partners that will heed my advice and not stab me in the back. I need people focused on success not swerves. I need beasts worried about championships, not love.
Now tell me, how are you two preparing for Shaw and Kash?
Power.
Yup, overpower them.
That's it? Not using your experience edge? Devon, you've held more tag team titles than Shaw and Kash have even had matches together.
Morgan, you've been in TNA longer than Shaw and Kash combined.
No need to complicate things, Sting. Power is the key to victory. Just break them in half, and we win. Simple as that.
That's your entire plan? Just overpower them?
Hey, its what works for us.
Alright. Well, I'll be in your corner tonight. And if you want my advice, just drop off the apron and I'll give it to you.
*Morgan shrugs* Works for me.
Morgan, Devon, and Sting exit. ------------------------
We cut backstage to Kid Kash and Sam Shaw.
I still think this is going too fast. The PPV was one thing but now we're in a number one contender's match? Kash, we don't have the experience Devon and Matt Morgan do. How are we supposed to beat them?
Same way we beat Daniels and Kaz. Just because our opponents aren't push overs, doesn't mean we are. Yeah, Devon and Morgan have more experience than us. Devon was apart of one of the greatest tag teams of all time and Morgan's no stranger to alliances. So what? Are they hungry than us though? Are they more determined than us? Hell no. Shaw, you got more heart than these two combined and it's too late in my career for me to watch another championship opportunity past me by. I'm going into this battle with every intention of walking out as the number one contenders to Magnus and Williams. Now are we on the same page or not?
We're... we're not. I wanted success, of course I did but I can't handle all of this at once. I need to build up to it.
Are you shitting me? Do you know how many guys on that roster want a title shot? Hell, do you know how many guys there are on the indies who wish they were here instead of you right now? You've been wrestling for over five years now. That's your damn build up! Shaw, right now this is the biggest chance life has ever given you and you're honestly telling me that you're not interested? MAN UP DAMN IT!
Alright, sorry. I'll do the best I can.
You'll do better than that! We are going to be the tag team champions and you're not going to stop me. Now let's go kick some ass and win us a title shot!
(Five minutes, blah blah blah.)
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