"No!No!No!No!No!No!No!No!No!" screamed former FAN Idol Square as the Host tried to convince him to pose for the cameras.
Senor Tyger: Look, I don't give a damn how many angles you have, how many equal sides, or what you think your area is! You can be a convex quadrilateral for all I care but you are going to pose for that picture! Get onto that circular stage!
It had been a long day for both the Host and the remaining 16 would-be FAN Idols.
The Freakin' Awesome Network's marketing department insisted that the contestants pose for their annual FAN Idol photobook. This year's edition was cunningly titled:
Songs "Songs?", J shook his head. "Really? What goofus came up with that theme?"
Among a panel of FAN representatives fielding questions from various media people, former FAN Idol Z-A Sandbaggin Son of a b!%
h let out a sad "Aww", and then returned his attention to a question about the Wyatt Family's new swamp music album.
"At least I have this puppy," J smirked and held up his new bronze medallion:
(I have no idea what this means)
J laughed, "Solve for J. Heh, J= The Next Fan Idol!"
Orange, wearing a bright Orange suit entreated Square to join J and himself on stage. "It's not so bad Square! Come on stage and get it over with. We've been waiting for you for an hour!" In his glaring Orange suit, Orange stuck out among the rest of the "Circle" set for the FAN Idol magazine suit. An aerial view appeared thus:
"Oh, c'mon you big baby!" Alex Hayden yelled from the "Costume" set, his arms crossed as he cosplayed the X-Men's Wolverine, adamantium claws bared to the world. Gus "The Predator" Richlen crouched amidst the branches of a genuine
Magnolia Amazonia, his laser site set upon the Tigeroid Host.
"Sigh. I'm sorry, Mr. Martel, they may be professional musicians but they are amateur models," the Host explained to his handsome guest.
"Why yes! Modeling, it is the hardest of efforts, yes?"
"Hardest of efforts... um, yeah, sure... oh bravo, Mr. Square, welcome to the Round world!"
Square finally made his way to the "Circle" set, took a deep breath, and smiled his 360 degree smile for the camera.
Anyway, with Ric Martel, fancy atomizer on hand, the Host announced the results for
Round 11: The Loneliest Number:
In 13th place, earning 22 points, is a contestant who continues to keep on ticking as this competition marches forward:
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Jazzman!!! who is counting down the minutes to the next Round, choosing Kyle Landry's Time!!!
With 24 points and landing in 12th place, is a contestant who always seems to have a fighting chance in whatever Season he plays in:
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Square!!! who brought us some sad, sad notes with Milky Chance's Sadnecessary!!!
Gathering 26 points from out judges and finding himself in 11th Place, is a contestant who is a veritable musical genius and definitely not one to sleep on this Season...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
J!!! who really showed off his mental acumen with Girl in a Coma's Smart!!!
Breaking into the top 10 with 35 points, is a contestant that delivered us a sound argument for why he is a force to be reckoned with this Season...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Alex Hayden: Weapon X!!! who conjured up the very elemental forces of r&b with Earth, Wind, and Fire's Reasons!!!
In 9th place, with a total score of 41... a piece are two contestants!!! Two for the price of one for the one word Round...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Roxie Daggers!!! who singled herself from the rest of the field with the hard-rocking ZO2's Isolate!!!
and
Sloth Spartan!!! who doesn't need a crystal ball to know he's moving forward by using Sublime w/Rome's Santeria (Live SWU Music and Arts Festival, Brazil 2010)!!!
8th place is reserved for a contestant who busted out a classic rock staple for this wide-open Round. With 42 points, all the ladies love...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Majin Brad!!! who wasn't Monkeeing around this Round when he chose Davy Jones' Girl!!!
Scoring 44 big time points and wrapping up 7th place is a contestant who knows what it's like to let his inner animal take over...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}Lodi "Wyatt" Rulz!!! who let the voices lead him to victory with Guided by Voices' Pantherz!!!
6th place is the site of our second tie!!! Earning 45 points a piece, just one point from a three way tie with 7th, are a pair of contestants who never play it safe musically...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Pegasus Warrior!!! who cackled maniacally as he sent us Interpol's Evil!!1
and
radradsley!!! who let his hair down and kicked off his heels with Yodelice's Free!!!
Hauling in 49 points... a piece, are two contestants landing in 5th place!!! The competition gets harder and harder and there is less room at the top because of competitors like...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Gus "The Predator" Richlen!!! who keeps on trucking with C.W. McCall's Route 66 anthem Convoy!!!
and
Orange!!! who keeps on hanging around the competition with Mark Ronson and Amy Winehouse's cover of the Zuton's indie rock hit Valerie!!!
Knocking on the top three at 4th place is a contestant who has been up and down but has held on tight thus far this Season. Securing 51 points is...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
suavegentleman!!! who's flying high and gliding into the next Round with the Lumineers' folksy Falling!!!
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Knalsic Loves to Boogie.
Moonie.
Mr. B Natural: Law/Disorder.
Please Step Forward.
You three contestants have performed marvelously in the face of a rather difficult Round. Though it allowed for a wide variety of potential musical choices, Round 11: The Loneliest Number also set up innumerable pitfalls for contestants to trip themselves on. Only two points separated 1st from 3rd place. Going into the next Round, which contestant found themselves all alone at the top of the mountain?
With 57 points, the winner is...
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
Knalsic Loves to Boogie!!! who told the judged to gimme gimme gimme first place, with Me First & the Gimmes Gimmes Elenore!!! Congratulations!!!
Not to be out done, Moonie soared oh so close to the top, finding success and 56 points with Jefferson Airplane's Today!!!
In third place, only one point away from a tie with second at 55 points is Mr. B Natural: Law/Disorder!!! who chose to put on the black hat and choose Disorder, selecting the legendary Eagles' Desperado, much to Terry Funk's delight!!!
Judge's Scores:
{Spoiler}{Spoiler}
1. Knalsic Loves to Boogie
Elenore- Me First & The Gimme Gimmes
CF-14, D-15, FW-14, NC-5, SC-9= 57
2. Moonie
Today- Jefferson Airplane
CF-9, D-13, FW-8, NC-13, SC-13= 56
3. Mr. B Natural: Law/Disorder
Desperado- The Eagles
CF-15, D-3, FW-9, NC-12, SC-16= 55
4. suavegentleman
Falling- The Lumineers
CF-11, D-12, FW-3, NC-10, SC-15= 51
T-5. Orange
Valerie- Mark Ronson ft. Amy Winehouse
CF-3, D-14, FW-5, NC-15, SC-12= 49
T-5. Gus “The Predator” Richlen
Convoy- C. W. McCall
CF-16, D-16, FW-1, NC-2, SC-14 = 49
T-6. Pegasuswarrior
Evil- Interpol
CF-12, D-9, FW-10, NC-9, SC-5= 45
T-6. Radradsley
Free- Yodelice
CF-5, D-11, FW-4, NC-14, SC-11= 45
7. Lodi “Wyatt” Rulz
Pantherz- Guided by Voices
CF-10, D-4, FW-15, NC-11, SC-4= 44
8. Majin Brad
Girl- Davy Jones
CF-6, D-6, FW-16, NC-6, SC-8= 42
T-9. Roxie Daggers
Isolate- ZO2
CF-13, D-10, FW-13, NC-4, SC-1= 41
T-9. Sloth Spartan
Santeria - Sublime With Rome (Live SWU Music and Arts Festival, Brazil 2010)
CF-7, D-7, FW-12, NC-8, SC-7= 41
10. Hayden Moss
Reasons- Earth, Wind, and Fire
CF-1, D-2, FW-6, NC-16, SC-10= 35
11. J
Smart- Girl in a Coma
CF-2, D-1, FW-11, NC-6, SC-6= 26
12. Square
Sadnecessary- Milky Chance
CF-7, D-5, FW-7, NC-3, SC-2= 24
13. Jazzman
Time- Kyle Landry
CF-8, D-8, FW-2, NC-1, SC-3 = 22
, that mean clown's gonna put paper bags over my feet and tie a can to my tail. 