My upstairs neighbours are having very loud sex

[Welfare Willis]

Feb 6, 2017 17:41:20 GMT -5 Sephiroth said:

Broomstick on the ceiling time

Whoa, TMI there buddy.

[Hit Girl]

Feb 6, 2017 17:17:13 GMT -5 SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman said:

Pretty sure she's faking it.

You mean she's not really your neighbour?

[El Cokehead del Knife Fight]

Call for the hot tag

[Demented]

Feb 7, 2017 5:06:36 GMT -5 El Cokehead del Knife Fight said:

Call for the hot tag

Better yet, find a cute neighbor to join in. You got 4 people going at it...

[Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!!]

I'll do you one better. keep in mind I live in a house, not an apartment. one night a few years back I went to the toilet at like 2 in the morning and heard my friend who lives in the house next door loudly having sex. it was the most awkward bowel movement in history.

[SmashTV]

My girlfriend and I were sitting in our garden last summer at about 11pm. We needed to cool off (not that it was us having sex, we were just warm due to the heat) and heard a couple somewhere having noisy sex.

The thing is, it was about three streets away but still loud. If we could hear it then their neighbours must have had the full audio experience.

[badkarma]

Record the audio, upload it to youtube, and leave a note on their front door with the link.

[Stone Coke Miami Watson 🥃]

Yell to her in your best Mortal Kombat voice: "FINISH HIM!!!"

If they go back to it, then yell (in your best Mortal Kombat voice...): "ROUND TWO....FIGHT!!!"

[Deleted]

Wife's friend was a roommate and got loud with her boyfriend one night.
So, the Mrs. & I paid her back. Not just being loud, but damn near doing play-by-play.

She got the hint. And started looking for another place.

[bibboid]

While at a hotel in San Diego, the couple next door got really loud one night. Fortunately, our kids were fast asleep and didn't hear the moaning and groaning and screaming and yelling and headboard banging. And they did it all three separate times, each time louder than the last. The next morning, the wife and I were joking about how loud they were (and referring to them by name since they yelled them enough times the night before).

So, the wife sends me down to the lobby to get some coffee and breakfast. I take the chattier of the boys (who were three or four at the time). We step out our door and push the elevator button when the door next to ours opens and the couple walks out. Hunter points and happily says, "Look daddy! It's Kathy and John!" The two of them freeze. Hunter continues, "Mommy and daddy said that you guys were noisy last night! We're not allowed to make noise in hotel rooms!" The girl turns bright red , lets out a strangled squawk, and runs back into her room. The guy falls back against the wall like someone pushed him. The elevator doors open and I pull Hunter in with me. As the doors start to close, Hunter calls out," See you guys later!!" (For the record, we never saw them again)

[Perd]

I had a upstairs neighbor that would band his gf, then sing songs from Grease on his karaoke machine. It's why I always make sure to only ever watch Grease when I'm alone.

[Hit Girl]

I'd go upstairs and knock on the door.

I'd say "excuse me, you are being very inconsiderate to be having such loud passionate sex and not even have the decency to invite me"

[Deleted]

Feb 8, 2017 1:19:54 GMT -5 Perd said:

I had a upstairs neighbor that would band his gf, then sing songs from Grease on his karaoke machine. It's why I always make sure to only ever watch Grease when I'm alone.

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew You watch Greece!? You know its all fake! They were following a script, they didn't write any of those songs!

Anyway, from the other side. I was with my gf and she is a screamer. And in the middle we hear "AH HEM" from the lounge room. My brother had come home early and heard everything.

[Deleted]

I had a friend who lived upstairs from me for a couple years, who I know for a fact was faking it often with her bf. Not because of him, but because she apparently.......didn't like sex? Which stinks because, on top of being really cool and quirky and into me at one point or 2, she had a fantastic body.

Then a few years later, after she moved out, the guy who moved in there used to bop his gf on occasion.


To be fair, when my gf lived with me, we were destroying each other sexually on a very regular basis so if I was complaining I'm not really one to get away with it.



............nowadays, that I'm single and moved elsewhere, everyone around me nowadays is in their 60's-80's, so I'm glad I don't hear these things anymore.

[Hit Girl]

I had neighbours once who used to howl loudly, but it turns out they were just werewolves.

[MrElijah]

Feb 7, 2017 20:06:33 GMT -5 @sandman said:

Wife's friend was a roommate and got loud with her boyfriend one night.
So, the Mrs. & I paid her back. Not just being loud, but damn near doing play-by-play.

She got the hint. And started looking for another place.

So. How did you call the action: Tony-style, JR, The Brain, Ventura or Gorilla?

[Deleted]

Feb 8, 2017 21:08:58 GMT -5 MrElijah said:

Feb 7, 2017 20:06:33 GMT -5 @sandman said:

Wife's friend was a roommate and got loud with her boyfriend one night.
So, the Mrs. & I paid her back. Not just being loud, but damn near doing play-by-play.

She got the hint. And started looking for another place.

So. How did you call the action: Tony-style, JR, The Brain, Ventura or Gorilla?

Lots of referring to body parts, so Gorilla wins out.
However, the Mrs. was calling her end like Joey Styles.

[xCompackx]

Feb 8, 2017 21:20:21 GMT -5 @sandman said:

Feb 8, 2017 21:08:58 GMT -5 MrElijah said:

So. How did you call the action: Tony-style, JR, The Brain, Ventura or Gorilla?

Lots of referring to body parts, so Gorilla wins out.
However, the Mrs. was calling her end like Joey Styles.

Should've been a Vince "WHATTAMANEUVER" in there.