Dealing with anniversaries of bad things happening.

[Shai]

So first a little backstory on me. When I graduated high school I went to Johnson and Wales University in Rhode Island and graduated with a bachelors in Culinary Arts and Restaurant Management. The plan was to eventually open my own soul food diner. I worked at shitty places like Applebees for a while then I finally got a really good job at a Italian place. I paid off my student loans and finally got my credit standing in a place where a bank giving me a business loan wasn't out of the question.

Then it was all ruined by a idiot.

11 years ago today I was walking across the parking lot of the mall when a guy came speeding around a corner not looking where he was going and hit me.

I ended up with a skull fracture, broken collarbone, broken arm , broken hip, broken leg, basically the entire left side of my body got trashed. I'm pretty much held together on that side with rods and pins.

11 years later I'm still suffering the after affects. I ended up with a traumatic brain injury so I have short term memory loss and a few other brain related problems that put me at a high risk for things like dementia. I can't stand on my feet or walk for long periods and even carrying my kids around is a struggle.

I wouldn't say my life is ruined because I probably wouldn't have moved from NY to Kansas, met my husband and had my kids.

It's just really sucks sometimes to look at my diploma and think about all the hard work I put in to get it only to not be able to really use it.

Not to metion all the extra health problems that I have to deal with. Like even now I'm about to have to have a hip replacement at 35 because being preggers three times messed up my hip even more.

It's just hard sometimes to deal with all this that happened because of an idiot with a cup of coffee.

[Spiderf 4]

F*** that sucks.

So you can't really cook anymore? At least not in a busy restaurant setting?

[Shai]

Mar 11, 2017 8:44:19 GMT -5 Spiderf 4 said:

F*** that sucks.

So you can't really cook anymore? At least not in a busy restaurant setting?

Nope. Not only will my leg not stand up to me being on my feet like that. I don't have the ability to retain recipes or orders like I used to.

[The Unconquered Sun]

I'm sorry. All I can say bless you to you and your family. Wishing you peace and good health.

[mattperiolat]

'Im sorry' is too small for what you have endured. You have my undying respect for simply getting out of bed every morning and for perseverance for eleven years. It's an amazing accomplishment and I sincerely hope every day, when you look in the mirror, you celebrate how far you have come and continue to carry forward. I salute you.

[SmashTV]

When I read the title, I had an idea of what my response was going to be as I have a method of dealing with a bad anniversary (relationship trouble, all my own fault).

Then I read your post and felt pathetic - my issue was and is absolutely nothing compared to what you've gone through. Mega kudos to you, take comfort in your husband and kids and my good wishes to you for the future.

[WoodStoner1]

The day of my dad's death 2 years ago is coming up.

[DiBiase is Good]

I found out on my first wedding anniversary that my mum had terminal cancer, so I'm always a bit paranoid on that day.

[lucas_lee]

I don't know how to deal with it either. I'm still a mess on my dad's death anniversary and my all 3 of my grandad a death anniversary. I try to make it another day, but any reminders I see I become a mess again. I've already forgotten my best friends death anniversary so at least that's one painful memory I don't have to relive

[The Unconquered Sun]

Some of you know this, my dad died on my 30th birthday. The next year obviously was really hard on me. Made harder by my then girlfriend forgetting both my the birthday and the anniversary of my dad.
Anyways 15 years later it's still an ugly day for me.

[Glitch]

I thought this was gonna about the anniversary of the earthquake/tsunami that hit Japan in 2011. Lot's of my friends live or know people who live in Japan, and facebook is filled with how this hits close to them.
The op story just makes this worse. F this day. -__-

[edgestar]

The 5 years anniversary of one of my dogs passing, was March 9th. I was having a hard time knowing it was coming up, then one of my other dogs had to be put down, due to old age, having a heart murmur and dementia.

I'm truly sorry for what you went through. Brain injuries are no joke. Any bump my mom hears, she worries that I'm having a seizure. I hope that you can enjoy life.

[jagilki]

Thanksgiving is kind of different for me now as that time of the year was when I got my leg amputated.

[Vincent Whiney]

The 9 year anniversary of my Aunt's death was March 10, it's still not an easy day for anyone. My sister died right after Thanksgiving 2011, she had a lot of mental and drug issues but there's still a lot of guilt and grief over how that all played out. It's especially hard on my mom, which is understood obviously but it does make for some hard holidays. We agreed, her included that it helps if she spends that time across the country with my brother. So Thanksgiving for me is this kind of awkward lonely time.

[J. Hova]

Wow, that freaking sucks. As mentioned above, brain injuries are just flat out scary. With all of the new information coming out and research, I'm moderately concerned with the concussions I've had in my life (I've had 3 diagnosed from bike accident, football, and a car accident).

There are 3 anniversaries that I think I'll remember for the rest of my life: My dad's death in 2011, a close friend was killed in a snowmobile accident in 2014, and my dog dying in 2016.

My dad's anniversary I tend to talk to my mom, siblings, etc. I'll have a drink or 2 in his honor (he was fond of vodka and 7s). My friend I'll spend time with friends, go to dinner, etc. My dog was pretty tough and I had him for almost 13 years. He was my shadow and it was just recently 1 year, and I still can't believe that he left me here to fend for myself.

I know some people advocate therapy and stuff like that for dealing with traumatic events, but I'm just not wired that way and deal with stuff like that in my own way. It might not be the healthiest way in the world but it works for me.

[Dr. T is an alien]

My mom committed suicide on July 4th, so I seriously do not look forward to a holiday that everyone else does. I don't even like fireworks all that much anymore.