Online Job Surveys Are Evil

[KAMALARAMBO: BOOMSHAKALAKA!!!]

You know like when you apply online and it asks you questions like, “I get along with people from all ethnicities?” Then you choose strongly agree, agree, disagree, or strongly disagree.

I was surprised I had to fill one out today. I thought that was only entry level or retail stuff, but this is for a fairly well paying job in health care. The job involves helping immigrant populations with mental health afflictions. What the hell did they think I was going to answer to that one?

It’s a little nerve racking too. Because I’ve heard the results are calculated into a score that could disqualify you from the position or at least show you as scoring less than another candidate. As such it’s best to always choose strongly agree or strongly disagree to questions since they get the most points.

I don’t understand how these things are still being used and effective. Like I’ve heard for questions like, “People sometimes steal,” you’re supposed to put yourself in the question and answer strongly disagree. But of course people sometimes steal! If they didn’t then it would not be a concept.

[OldDirtyBernie]

I never understood them. When looking for a job, NO ONE is going to paint themselves in a bad light by choosing something that would suggest they're a bigot or would steal, so 99% of the application is bullshit anyway.

[KAMALARAMBO: BOOMSHAKALAKA!!!]

May 23, 2018 12:01:56 GMT -5 OldDirtyBernie said:

I never understood them. When looking for a job, NO ONE is going to paint themselves in a bad light by choosing something that would suggest they're a bigot or would steal, so 99% of the application is bullshit anyway.

Haha exactly. At least I didn’t have to do one today like this guy: www.askamanager.org/2018/02/a-job-application-asked-me-to-rank-if-torturing-a-person-was-worse-than-prostitution.html

I’m sure someone out there may think “receiving a medal for bravery” is worse than “torturing a person.” His answer is irrelevant though. He may be a terrible human being, but he’s a damn fine administrative assistant.

[Cyno]

But you don't find it MADDENING when the courts let guilty people go free?!?!?

Anyway, yeah, your answers for those things don't matter whatsoever as long as you answer "strongly agree" or "strongly disagree." It's supposed to be that they want someone decisive and not wishy-washy about making decisions but then no human actually looks at the answers given and it's all calculated by computer.

[Fade]

One of my biggest pet peeves. That theyre even a thing is infuriating.

[KAMALARAMBO: BOOMSHAKALAKA!!!]

May 23, 2018 14:51:06 GMT -5 Fade said:

One of my biggest pet peeves. That theyre even a thing is infuriating.

Yeah, there is a special place in Hell for whoever invented these things.

[Clash, Never a Meter Maid]

They’re incredibly annoying, but they put them there because they’re looking for someone who can be both loyal to the company line and also assertive when necessary. Some of the statements do often steer into Goofus and Gallant territory though, like “it is okay for employees to steal some of the time “. You’re like, come on.

[Deleted]

I always thought they were bullshit, but way back when I was a teenager, I was actually grilled over my answers when I was hired on at Wal-mart. They wanted to know the reasons behind every single one.

Then they made me watch anti-union propaganda videos for an hour.

[Malcolm]

The thing I hate most about these are that these are mostly question that should be asked in an interview, so you're basically doing an interview just to get an interview.

[Shy Guy]

I was filling out a questionnaire like the ones you guys are talking about, and one of the questions was like "if I feel tired, I'll take something to wake me up".
Strongly disagree, disagree, etc.

I'm looking at it like....do they want to know if I drink coffee, or do I do cocaine?

[Mighty Attack Tribble]

They're nothing to a new trend I've encountered recently in my search to find a better job: audition videos. In four jobs I've applied for the very last step before completing the application has been to record and submit a 30-second video explaining why I should be considered for interview. Because clearly reading all the information I've just spent the previous 20 minutes supplying is obviously too much hassle.

[Sparkybob]

It's just to weed out bad applicants.

[Push R Truth]

I know our online survey is purposefully annoying just to weed people out. We are a public office, if a short survey annoys you ... you ain't going to survive when Grandma calls complaining that her road is icy and you should be fired for not bowing down and sending an army of trucks to her location immediately in the middle of a blizzard.

[pegasuswarrior]

May 24, 2018 11:47:23 GMT -5 Sparkybob said:

It's just to weed out bad applicants.

This.

“I want the job.”

-Ok, fill this out.-

“But I don’t *really* want the job that bad.”

-Next.-

[Reflecto]

May 23, 2018 14:48:59 GMT -5 Cyno said:

But you don't find it MADDENING when the courts let guilty people go free?!?!?

Anyway, yeah, your answers for those things don't matter whatsoever as long as you answer "strongly agree" or "strongly disagree." It's supposed to be that they want someone decisive and not wishy-washy about making decisions but then no human actually looks at the answers given and it's all calculated by computer.

Well, also keep in mind a lot of the "stupid" questions on this have to also be changed to something different as well.

Like for instance in this example, the "Don't you find it MADDENING when the courts let guilty people go free?" sounds like something that would piss off a lot of people, even normally, but it's really the company saying "Don't you just HATE authority and ignore what an authority tells you in favor of doing what you want to do?"- which is a whole different story.

Same with things like "People sometimes steal", where "I know people who have once stolen something in their life" needs to be read as "I hang out with thieves."