I hate American Healthcare.....

[J. Hova]

My 74 year old mother took a tumble two weekends ago and broke her upper arm, dislocated her shoulder, and did a lot of soft tissue damage to her left side.  They decided to take a conservative approach and try to rehab it and discharged her back to her house.  I spent most of last week there at her house making sure she was well and she did alright at home, approximately 14-18 hours a day on average.  They prescribed her oxycontin for pain which I wasn't comfortable with and eventually called up her orthopedist to have him prescribe something a little less strong since she was out of it on that stuff.  I'm also her medical proxy, FYI.

Last weekend, she got a little ahead of herself and took another tumble while trying to return from the bathroom unattended.  I got her to the ER where they determined she didn't do any other further damage other than soft tissue.  They discharged her to a nursing home/rehab facility so she can have multiple per day therapy sessions to get her where she can be more independent at home.  I was pretty hesitant to put her in there given COVID, but this is the only place around that has had zero patient cases and the doctor told me if he was in my spot, it is where he'd put his mother.

I've been keeping in touch with her via phone calls and video calls, along with my sister, nieces, and brother.  She's made progress, especially once they got her off all pain meds other than tylenol.  Her only real complaint has been minor bed sores, which started while she was at home and they've been treating.  I was on the phone with her earlier this evening and she was complaining of new pain in her left leg that was creeping up and becoming worse.  I had her call the nurse and the nurse eventually said it would be prudent to send her to the hospital to get tested for blood clots.  She's there now getting tests and I can't go due to COVID restrictions.

Am I wrong thinking she has just gotten the shittiest healthcare imaginable?  Is this normal?  I just keep thinking it shouldn't be this hard with a broken bone and some soft tissue injuries.  It just seems like she has paid into Medicare and various insurance plans her entire life and the one time she actually needs in depth care, she is just screwed over.  Is this just a US thing that it is this bad?

On a side note, I lost it on a poor nurse from the home.  She wasn't even gone two minutes from that facility and the nurse called me and told me they have a bed hold policy of three days.  I almost feel bad, but I am not there yet.

[J. Hova]

Well, she does have a minor clot to be treated with medicine. She is getting discharged back to the rehab facility.

And another thing...apparently they will take you from a rehab facility in an ambulance but you are on your own to get back. For the low, low price of 350.00 they will take you back in an ambulance. I'm having this hilarious thought of my mother hitchhiking back in a hospital gown, but that is because I'm sick and evil. On a serious note, she is being picked up by my sister who lives like 5 minutes away from that hospital as opposed to the 25 minutes I live away.

[Natural Born Farmer]

It's a bad situation and I'm sorry you're dealing with that, but I've read your OP twice and I'm not seeing where the medical professionals came up short here.

[Citizen Snips]

Yeah, I'm not really seeing how the providers have done anything wrong here. When you say it shouldn't be "that hard with a broken bone/soft tissue injuries", it sounds like you expect a 74 year old body to just bounce back from an injury. Elderly people have much slower recoveries and are at much higher risk of complications developing from things like this.

And while you're stressed, leave the nurses alone. Go out in the parking lot and scream if you're stressed. As awful as this year has been for everyone, it has been exponentially worse for nurses.

[J. Hova]

I guess my frustration stems mostly from not being able to get an answer from anybody on anything. I ask a question as her medical proxy and son, and get a two word answer and told to have a nice day. I know they are short staffed and underpaid, but I'm asking these questions because I have legitimate concerns. I have no medical training and want to understand her recovery and plans thereof. It doesn't help this happened now as opposed to a year ago or a year from now. It just seems at times that she is an afterthought.

I understand that she is older now and won't bounce back like a 25 year old, but she is very active and social senior. I think that is part of the problem, she is absolutely stir crazy right now. The good thing is she had a very emotional reunion with my sister and one of my nieces last night when they drove her back to the center.

I only went off on the nurse since the first thing out of her mouth was the bed hold policy. I know they are in an impossible situation right now, but that just sent me over the friggin falls last night. I don't care about your policies, procedures, financial situation, or plumbing problems. I want to know how my mother is, her status, and what the plans are for her.

I know they are all doing their best, but it's my mom. I want better than their best.

[Scott]

It’s not that there are too many hands in the pot, but there are a lot of gears in the machine. First they need to treat her injuries which can be an unpredictable recovery...in this case, she already developed the clots and the sores. Luckily, they don’t sound serious, but it adds time.

Second, one fall happens, but two falls raises safety concerns for healthcare providers. Great that she’s active and will probably be ok once she’s healed, but social work/care coordination will want to evaluate. Toss in PT/OT, and it’s just a process.

Have patience, she’ll be ok. Be thankful that she didn’t hit her head or worse. It’s not even COVID, it’s just typical. It’s hard for one person to give all the answers, especially one nurse...they’re often the last to know the plans unfortunately.