Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 10, 2021 17:25:02 GMT -5
Hey everyone.
So part inspired by the recent Eddie Kingston stuff and part by own experiences, I thought I'd create this thread.
My idea is for a thread where people can't post about how they're doing, with no judgement and only get advice if they specifically ask for it.
So for me, I'm struggling at the moment. I've mentioned my alcoholism, but this is the only place I've been brave enough to say it. Its been getting worse recently and I can feel it impacting on my life again. At the same time my partner's anxiety and depression is spiking, as it has for the last 2 years. She's repeatedly asked for help and has repeatedly been passed around and never found a long term help plan which has made things worse. She's occasionally suicidal and it's rough.
So yeah things aren't great at the moment. But I want this thread, if becomes anything, to be a place where people can share how they're feeling, but also share resources that have helped them. Maybe it could point someone in the right direction. Or maybe just vented without judgement could help to. Let's see what happens.
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Post by Clash, Never a Meter Maid on Nov 10, 2021 18:00:47 GMT -5
Speaking as someone who goes through periodic anxiety bouts, I totally understand dude.
My advice is to stay close to all the people treating you kindly and get all the support you can. You’re not alone in that struggle, and frankly I’m glad society as a whole is making being open about it less taboo.
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J is Justice
Wade Wilson
Will now be grateful.
Hi.
Posts: 28,609
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Post by J is Justice on Nov 10, 2021 18:28:07 GMT -5
I've been struggling with anxiety for years. The way I deal with it is mindful meditation and exercise. Mindful meditation has taught me how to deal with anxious thoughts, though they still win sometimes. And can't concentrate on anxious thoughts when your arms and legs are screaming from exercise.
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Post by Mighty Attack Tribble on Nov 10, 2021 18:50:12 GMT -5
I've really struggled with motivation this year. On a good day I'll get home from work around 7:30am, go straight to bed, wake up around 4pm, lay in bed doing nothing until 9pm, get up, shower, and go to work for 11pm.
On a bad day I'll do all of the above except get up, shower, and go to work.
Needless to say, even my good days are pretty bad. I've gained 40lb in the last twelve months and find doing basic physical activities both painful and mechanically difficult. I've tried therapy but it became clear after a while that wasn't helping.
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Post by Limity (BLM) on Nov 10, 2021 18:55:28 GMT -5
I'm not sure if this fits the parameters of the thread, but a few months ago I read The Body Keeps The Score, by Bessel Van Der Kolk. It's a comprehensive book about trauma, and all the ways it changes a person, from mentally to emotionally to physically. It also goes into various treatments and therapies that can help.
I can't recommend it enough to everyone, as it has helped me understand why and what others are going through and feeling, and even helped me with some issues I've been grappling with.
But to the OP, *hugs!* It's not much, but it is freely given and well meant.
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Post by "Gizzark" Mike Wronglevenay on Nov 10, 2021 18:57:30 GMT -5
I am seeing my therapist for the first time in a while on Tuesday. I wish I could afford to see her all the time.
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Post by edgestar on Nov 10, 2021 18:59:12 GMT -5
Sometimes I have anxiety, but for the most part, I'm happy. I've been given wonderful experiences in life, despite having seizures and having a shunt. My husband and I went to Rhode Island Comic Con, this past weekend, and one of the people we met, was JBL. He asked how the day was, and I said I make the best of everyday, even when I am upset. His response: you have a great outlook. I still have my moments, but, it's okay. We lift each other up.
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Post by zrowsdower on Nov 17, 2021 22:03:48 GMT -5
If I can be honest, I really don't like life very much. I have struggled with depression and have really had a hard time finding closure from many painful things that have happened. But, I continue to stay sober (if nothing happens November 20th will mark three years and nine months, my longest sobriety time so far) and earlier this year, I overcame my fear of driving enough to get my license. I'm trying to see these things as accomplishments, but sometimes I am not really sure. Also, not looking forward to next week or next month. Anyway, sorry for rambling.
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Post by Cyno on Nov 17, 2021 22:09:38 GMT -5
Daylight Savings Time ending and its associated shift in weather and day/night cycle always f***s with me. SAD on top of the usual depression/anxiety problems is a special kind of suckiness.
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Spider2024
Patti Mayonnaise
Dedicated 6,666th post to Irontyger
I believe in Joe Hendry.
Posts: 39,275
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Post by Spider2024 on Nov 17, 2021 22:23:40 GMT -5
If I can be honest, I really don't like life very much. I have struggled with depression and have really had a hard time finding closure from many painful things that have happened. But, I continue to stay sober (if nothing happens November 20th will mark three years and nine months, my longest sobriety time so far) and earlier this year, I overcame my fear of driving enough to get my license. I'm trying to see these things as accomplishments, but sometimes I am not really sure. Also, not looking forward to next week or next month. Anyway, sorry for rambling. I feel like I can echo a lot of this. I don't think I've ever been "happy" in my entire life. It's like something's always been 'bothering me' and things are always weighing me down. I guess what I'm wondering is, how do people feel when they're not "happy" or "down"? My depressed mood always seems to be there when I'm not directly happy.
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Post by xCompackx on Nov 17, 2021 23:02:25 GMT -5
I'm on day 3 of my second SSRI after the one didn't help and it's... okay? I honestly don't even know how long I've had anxiety and it's like, how does it feel not being anxious? But I mean, I feel content so I guess something's happening.
Hopefully anyone struggling can get the help they need. It's been a f***ing tough couple years, for sure.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 18, 2021 0:02:16 GMT -5
Schizoaffective (which is Bipolar and Schizophrenic at the same time)
Major Depressive Disorder
Social Anxiety
Insomnia
Anger issues (mostly because I'm bipolar)
And of course like a lot of mentally ill people, I have a substance abuse problem. Fortunately my top drug of choice is weed and now its both legal here and helpful for some of my problems. Where it becomes an issue is that I have to smoke weed constantly. If I'm awake and not at work I'm either smoking weed or thinking about smoking it.
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Post by Jaws the Shark on Nov 18, 2021 10:15:56 GMT -5
I am seeing my therapist for the first time in a while on Tuesday. I wish I could afford to see her all the time. This hits home. I've experienced pretty bad depressive episodes since I was a teenager (which I've wondered for about eighteen months if it wasn't just unipolar depression), and anxiety for longer, and I've gone through various courses treatment but via the NHS. The waiting lists are awful, most recently I waited six months for treatments that were frankly not fit for purpose. The courses of therapy also always have a set number of appointments that often feel quite inflexible to me, there are things that you cover at particular times, and if you're still struggling at the end you're just punted out the door with the suggestion that you go and see someone you have to pay, which I can't really afford to do.
What really worries me is that I know exactly why I'm depressed and could write a list of things that make me depressed and make me anxious, and a lot of them can't be fixed by the therapies that are on offer. No amount of mindfulness or antidepressants is going to alter them, they might make me tolerate them, but they aren't a fix. That's a pretty grim thought for me.
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Push R Truth
Patti Mayonnaise
Unique and Special Snowflake, and a pants-less heathen.
Perpetually Constipated
Posts: 39,296
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Post by Push R Truth on Nov 18, 2021 10:39:06 GMT -5
Daylight Savings Time ending and its associated shift in weather and day/night cycle always f***s with me. SAD on top of the usual depression/anxiety problems is a special kind of suckiness. Same here. One of the main things I do to decompress after work is random outside things likes gardening/fishing/hiking/walking/sitting on deck talking to friends-neighbors and having a tea/beer/soda. Then Daylight Savings Time ends. Instead of 2 hours of light after work to enjoy that stuff, I suddenly only have one. And every day after that it's a little shorter. Suddenly all it takes is one important call/email at the end of the work day or one errand to run and suddenly I drive into the garage at home and it's already dark outside. It's very hard on me. And every year it's a little bit worse.
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Post by zrowsdower on Nov 18, 2021 17:08:39 GMT -5
If I can be honest, I really don't like life very much. I have struggled with depression and have really had a hard time finding closure from many painful things that have happened. But, I continue to stay sober (if nothing happens November 20th will mark three years and nine months, my longest sobriety time so far) and earlier this year, I overcame my fear of driving enough to get my license. I'm trying to see these things as accomplishments, but sometimes I am not really sure. Also, not looking forward to next week or next month. Anyway, sorry for rambling. I feel like I can echo a lot of this. I don't think I've ever been "happy" in my entire life. It's like something's always been 'bothering me' and things are always weighing me down. I guess what I'm wondering is, how do people feel when they're not "happy" or "down"? My depressed mood always seems to be there when I'm not directly happy. I'm sorry that you can relate. I'm not really sure how to answer that except to say that I am constantly reminded that I am not worth a damn in this world. And you know.....it really hurts to not matter or be worth love and acceptance like I see others are. Yeah, feel free to call me a cuck or whatever the bloody hell weak people like me are called who talk like this. But I'm just tired of life and all the effort to better myself being in vain. I'm sorry.
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Spider2024
Patti Mayonnaise
Dedicated 6,666th post to Irontyger
I believe in Joe Hendry.
Posts: 39,275
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Post by Spider2024 on Nov 18, 2021 17:15:49 GMT -5
I feel like I can echo a lot of this. I don't think I've ever been "happy" in my entire life. It's like something's always been 'bothering me' and things are always weighing me down. I guess what I'm wondering is, how do people feel when they're not "happy" or "down"? My depressed mood always seems to be there when I'm not directly happy. I'm sorry that you can relate. I'm not really sure how to answer that except to say that I am constantly reminded that I am not worth a damn in this world. And you know.....it really hurts to not matter or be worth love and acceptance like I see others are. Yeah, feel free to call me a cuck or whatever the bloody hell weak people like me are called who talk like this. But I'm just tired of life and all the effort to better myself being in vain. I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you're feeling those things. My gripe is, while some people care, many other people literally couldn't care less. So many assholes in the world are ok with being mean and shitty to other people randomly because what does it matter to them? What does it matter to anyone? We could use far less asshole in this world, that's basically my point.
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Zone Was Wrong
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Currently living off the high that AEW brings every Wednesday and Friday
Posts: 16,201
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Post by Zone Was Wrong on Nov 18, 2021 17:15:57 GMT -5
Big time struggling with my depression lately. Been a year since I graduated with my Bachelor's degree and I still haven't found a job I went to school for. Pretty much doing contracting gigs atm. Just feeling lethargic and honestly disinterested in so many things that used to give me joy. Constantly tired. I'm happy I have a decent paying job and moved in with my future wife and her son, but I just really want to write for a living so much it hurts to even talk about it. Trying to stay on my meds and trying to stay positive, but most days I just don't want to leave my bed. I have to block so much from my thoughts to prevent having panic attacks because of my anxiety to top it off.
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Post by zrowsdower on Nov 18, 2021 18:20:04 GMT -5
Big time struggling with my depression lately. Been a year since I graduated with my Bachelor's degree and I still haven't found a job I went to school for. Pretty much doing contracting gigs atm. Just feeling lethargic and honestly disinterested in so many things that used to give me joy. Constantly tired. I'm happy I have a decent paying job and moved in with my future wife and her son, but I just really want to write for a living so much it hurts to even talk about it. Trying to stay on my meds and trying to stay positive, but most days I just don't want to leave my bed. I have to block so much from my thoughts to prevent having panic attacks because of my anxiety to top it off. I'm sorry about what you're going through. I hope you are able to find something soon.
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Sam Punk
Hank Scorpio
Own Nothing, Be Happy
Posts: 6,311
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Post by Sam Punk on Dec 2, 2021 2:41:01 GMT -5
I am seeing my therapist for the first time in a while on Tuesday. I wish I could afford to see her all the time. Good to see, brother!
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Square
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Official Ambassador
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Post by Square on Dec 2, 2021 11:24:19 GMT -5
Right now I should be on a plane, over to America for a holiday I've been looking forward to since the first lockdown. Instead today is my final day of self-isolation due to catching Covid and even though its been nearly 2 weeks since I first showed signs I still feel terrible and have barely any energy. I am so f***ing low right now and I don't really have anyone I can talk to because its either ruining other people's holiday or seeming ungrateful to the people who have helped look after me when I've been sick. I'm just left to internally scream which is super fun!
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