Official "Elijah Burke Responded To Me!" Thread

[EoE: Well There's Your Problem]

Any of his responses and original messages come here. I personally haven't sent him one yet, but if I do, I'll tell you.

[MGH]

Ah, glad this got made.

Hopefully I'll get a response to mine.

[koldbluddedkilla]

i couldn't think of a question to ask him, so i asked him if he liked orange juice.....and if he liked pulp in his juice.

[EJS]

Here's mine. I sent a follow up as well:

Hey, love the blog. I've got a question about the New Breed. How come you never tried to get Snitsky to join up? Is it the bacne? The stench? The foot-fetish? The fact that without any body hair he looks oddly like a walking wang? (and I don't mean Yang.) I think he would have worked out far better than CM Punk. I mean, grotesque appearance or no, the dude is undefeated in ECW! Also, whats up with WWE not making merchandise for the New Breed or any of it's members? All of the Originals have shirts, and even Balls Mahoney!

P.S. Do you have to pay royalties to Chris Jericho every time you say "YOUR Paragon of Virtue"?

-Eric

Lol. Snitsky isn't in his right mind...Therefore, it'll just be a big head to try and control the monster. They did make New Breed shirts as you may have seen me try to offer to Punk, but I stopped them from selling them because I was unhappy with the design! Paragon of Virtue is something that was used by Jericho very rarely and not one of his trademark catch phrases. Therefore, no royalties!

Wow, thanks for the response. Yeah I could see what you mean by a guy like Snitsky being hard to control! But I figure if you could wrangle together an "Alpha Male", a vampire (for a while at least), and a school teacher, you could probably handle ...whatever the hell Snitsky is.

And yeah, I remember that New Breed shirt on TV. It looked a bit plain and the logo seemed kind of small. They need to get a new version out already. And stuff for the individual New Breed members too. So much of what you say could easily be turned into t-shirts and then into money! It's not right when CM Punk, Tommy Dreamer, Sandman, and so on all have two or three different shirts for fans to choose from (and settle for once they realize they can't get any New Breed stuff).

Lol. Your Guiding Light will look into this matter!

[Joe Laracuente WAS WRONG]

Subject: Re: Elijah Burke IS ECW
From:E Experience <[e-mail]>
Date:Tue, May 08, 2007 11:56 pm
To:"Dr. Laracuente" <[e-mail]>

Sup Doc. Preciate the props. Obviously your smart enough to know talent when you see it!

"Dr. Laracuente" <[e-mail]> wrote:
Dear The Elijah Experience,

I think everyone in the world knows that your the future of this business!
Also I think everyone in the world knows that your going to become the next ECW champion! You can mop the floor with the others "superstars" in ECW. There not Superstars compared to you. Look who your facing. Kevin Thorn? Kevin Thorn will be begging for mercy when he steps in the ring with you! Snitsky? Give him the Elijah Express he'll be calling his mom! Win the title in front of your home crowd at One night Stand! Next ECW champion is...... Elijah Burke!!!!! EC DUB! EC DUB! EC DUB!

Sincerely,

Dr. Joseph Laracuente
P.h.D. University California Berkeley
____________________________________________________________
The Doorstop Nation
Rural Route 1 Box 714
Mifflintown, PA 17059
doorstopnation.com

[What?]

He responded to me, I made a thread yesterday.

officialfan.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=WWE&action=display&thread=1178613084

[Ozymandias]

Got a response from him too....I took a cue from an earlier poster about asking about pancakes!



Lol. There's so many places I could go with that! But I won't!



Ozy wrote:

Paragon of Virtue:

My girl makes worst pancakes, and she keeps saying she needs the ELIJAH EXPERIENCE to add that plentiful flavor. What ingredients would our holy Paragon use to make pancakes worthy of the EXPERIENCE? This is truly a virtuous undertaking.

Sincerely,

Elijah-less Pancake Chef





"Paragon of Virtue"

[acressl]

ozymandias said:

Got a response from him too....I took a cue from an earlier poster about asking about pancakes!



Lol. There's so many places I could go with that! But I won't!



Ozy wrote:

Paragon of Virtue:

My girl makes worst pancakes, and she keeps saying she needs the ELIJAH EXPERIENCE to add that plentiful flavor. What ingredients would our holy Paragon use to make pancakes worthy of the EXPERIENCE? This is truly a virtuous undertaking.

Sincerely,

Elijah-less Pancake Chef





"Paragon of Virtue"

Sick! Never in my wildest dreams did I think anyone could get a pancake response out of Elijah!

[voiceboxisback]

My Question to him for Face 2 Face:

Dear Mr. Burke,
Well this question has really bugged me for a long time, and it needs to be answered!

Why haven't they (the world) given the Paragon of Virtue, The Savior of ECW/WWE/WRESTLING/UNIVERSE, The Man with the Golden Plan, Elijah Burke all three world title belts, an honorary golden statue built in front of WWE Headquarters in Stamford, your own toothpaste brand, high ranking government position, Nobel Peace Prize, a Get-Out-Of-Jail Free Card, a key to every city in the United States, 45 disc Best of Elijah Burke DVD (which only would cover 20% of your accolades so far), the ability to rename ECW to Elijah Championship Wrestling, the quickest HOF induction in the history of mankind (NO, not you Mick Foley), and ownership of the entire continent of Europe? You are clearly qualified to have all of these, and you have obviously earned it! I wouldn't be surprised if you already have 95%, if not 100%, of these things accomplished yet choose to withhold them from the adoring public because of your unparalleled humbleness!
Please let me know!

A man coming from a unbiased standpoint and Parts Unknown,
The Voicebox

Eljiah Burke's Reply via E-mail:

Lol. Wow, its funny, a person such as myself is cetainly due all of the things that you've mentioned, but its the little things that matter...Like being courteous enough to leave your freakin name! What have I taught you and the rest of the world?

I got a even funnier responce when I formally introduced myself lol

I was the first, so technically I started the trend on this board. I also sent him another message in all seriousness yesterday asking:

Also, when did you get into wrestling business I am really interested in knowing at what age you did and how you did so? Are there any good schools you could suggest? The reason is I'm asking is because I was thinking about entering a Wrestling School in a few years, after I start and finish college.

To which he replied

3 letters...OVW...Period!!!!!!!!!!!

[Lenny: Smooth like Keith Stone]

Alright, I guess I'm now on the bandwagon as well. I just emailed Elijah.... I'll let you guys know if he replies to me.

[Tea & Crumpets]

You asked Elijah about pancake recipes, and he RESPONDED? OK, now he really is awesome.

Somebody has to mention this place in an email. Elijah on WrestleCrap would be fantastic.

[rrm15]

What the poster above me said. GET ELIJAH ON WC.

We would have actual proof that someone from WWE reads this...

People, this may be our best shot at getting Masters in a sombrero.

[Spyke the Pacers Fan]

rrm15 said:

What the poster above me said. GET ELIJAH ON WC.

We would have actual proof that someone from WWE reads this...

People, this may be our best shot at getting Masters in a sombrero.

If Elijah Burke can convince Vince McMahon to put Masters in a sombrero, there is no limit to what the man can do.

[Crappler El 0 M]

Here's my message, which has not been answered:

Dear Mr. Burke,

First off, I love your online column. Anyway, I have a question that I have been pondering ever since the debut of your New Breed stable. I have often tried to imagine what a conversation would be like between Matt Striker and former member Kevin the vampire. As the leader of this most eclectic stable of wrestlers, were you privy to any backstage conversations between the teacher and the vampire? If so, what would they talk about? I personally would like to think that the vampire and the teacher would sit down and discuss wrestling strategy. This would have made a great vignette. On a more serious note, you've really shown a lot of promise ever since you were relieved of the unenviable task of trying to make Sylvester Terkay look interesting. I don't care what he did in amateur wrestling and MMA, he had no personality and he was only holding you back. Anyway, you are the most entertaining performer in WWE. Keep up the good work.

[EJS]

I asked him one more:

Hey, sorry to keep bugging you, but I forgot to ask this earlier. What are your opinions on Bobby Lashley? It always seemed like he was ducking the competition when he was ECW champ to me. He spent far more time on Raw giving high-pitched promos about old-guy hair than he did defending the ECW Title...

No knock against guys like Test or Hardcore Holly, but he never really defended it against the top names in ECW, other than RVD, who probably got more chances than he deserved.

Bobby is on my hit list as well!

[disposablegreg]

where can I send him a message? It would be an awesome if I got a reply

[EJS]

His email is [e-mail]

He takes questions and answers some in his "Face 2 Face" blog on ECW.com.

[Lenny: Smooth like Keith Stone]

Alright guys, I just got my Elijah reply meaning I'm now officially in the club I guess!

Here is what I sent him:
I gotta ask you Elijah, do you like Layla better with curly hair or straight? That debate has caused quite a rift among the internet fans. Clearly we know what the important issues are.......

Also I think you should kick CM Punk out of the New Breed and replace him with Snitsky. CM Punk may be addicted to competition, but Snitsky is addicted to high heel shoes. I think high heel shoes are way better. I would like to know your thoughts on Snitsky.


And here is his answer:

C.M.Punk is addicted to more than just pain.....

[voiceboxisback]

I think he knows about the crap now, who told him about it?

Here is the latest email I sent him:

Cool, I like OVW, I've watched it since the days of when Eugene was "Mr. Wrestling" Nick Dinsmore, and Benjamin and Lesnar were teaming as The Minnesota Stretching Crew. Wait don't you have to be signed to a developmental contract to be trained at OVW, or just to be featured on OVW TV? Also, I wish you could use Crosstown Traffic as your entrance music again, Hendrix f'n rules.

here is his reply:

Lol!!!!!!! Now YOU in general are really entertaining me dawg. Good stuff! But if I could be serious for a min (no, I do not owe royalties to Lance Storm b4 one of the Crap Pac emails me that), you should contact OVWrestling.com for all the info on that. OVW helps you get signed if you have the potential and is under contract!

[Shy Guy]

the crap pac? does he know about us?