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Post by Poker Joker on Feb 21, 2006 12:10:22 GMT -5
(We return from the Gasoline segment to see Mr. Big and Curly Long still in the ring celebrating their victory, much to the dismay of the fans. A couple of empty soda containers have been tossed into the ring, making a mess. Suddenly, Curly and Big's music stops playing. Curly grabs a microphone and starts to address the guys in the back.)
*CURLY*: Um.... Excuse me! Monkeys in the sound booth! Me and Mr. Big are still havin' a little fun out here. Unless you want me to come back there and shove those fancy soundboards you run up your collective asses, you'd better put our music back on.
(Nothing happens. Fans start chanting "V.L.B.," which gets Curly visibly upset. After a couple seconds of making obscene gestures to fans, Curly addresses the sound guys, again.)
*CURLY*: Yo! High school drop-outs! I'm not f***ing around out here! If I gotta come back there and put my own music back on MYSELF, I swear I'll bust your skulls like a carton of eggs!
(Nothing happens, again. Mr. Big nudges Curly and starts to say something, but Curly holds a hand up to him. Mr. Big shuts up and Curly starts talking again.)
*CURLY*: Last chance, you f***sticks! Now are you gonna turn my music back on or....
(Suddenly, music starts blasting over the loudspeaker... but its not Curly's. Its "Like A Virgin" by Madonna. Down the asile, wearing his leather coat over yellow-and-green tights is Billy "The Virgin" Ubermark. Billy steps into the ring, and motions for another microphone, which he gets. He then starts walks to the center of the ring where Curly and Mr. Big are standing.)
*CURLY* (addressing the crowd with a smile on his face): Well, well, well! If it isn't "Mr. Virgin Discrimination," himself. (Curly looks at Billy) So, Billy... How ya been, lately? That love-life of your's still flatline?
(The crowd gives a loud "Oooh!" for Curly's pointed comment. Billy gets a slight smirk on his face from the insult. He takes a second or two and then starts talking, himself.)
*BU*: I'm doin' good, Curly. Except, its time for my next match in the tournament, and I've got a LITTLE problem.... you!
(The crowd gives a big "Ooooh!" after Billy's comments. Curly clinches a fist for a second before putting on a forced smile and talking again.)
*CURLY*: Well, you'd better watch out, Virgin-Boy, because sometimes those LITTLE problems can jump up and bite you in the ass. Don't let that get you too excited, though. I'd hate to see you make a mess in yer tights.
(The crowd, again, gives an "Oooh!)
*CURLY*: So you're my next opponent in this number one contenders tourney. Well, ain't that funny. You know, Billy, if I'm not mistaken, I've got a score to settle with you, anyways.
*BU* (smiling): You do, huh? Well, its a SMALL world, ain't it, Curly?....
(Another "Oooh!" from the fans.)
*BU* (continuing): ... And don't worry, Curly. My LITTLE problem ain't gonna get to me, because I plan on making SHORT work of you.
(Again, the crowd gives a loud "Oooh!" Curly nods his head, and clinches a fist, again. Behind him, Mr. Big cracks his knuckles and gives Billy a firm stare.)
*CURLY* (chuckling): "SHORT work of me." I like that. You know, I like you, Billy. You've got SPUNK! I can see it. Its all over your hands from beating off to whatever cheesey skin-flick you were watching on Cinimax.....
(Another "Oooh!" from the fans. Billy's smirk fades away from his face.)
*BU*: Well, then... it looks like this is going to be the second time, today, that I PUNCH THE MUNCHKIN.
(Another "Oooh!" from the fans. Curly let his fake smile fade away, too.)
*CURLY*: Well, you right ahead and try to do that, then, Billy. But if you look around, right now, I think you'll notice that the odds are in my favor.
(Curly motions to Mr. Big who steps up from behind him and comes face to face with Billy. Billy looks at Mr. Big and gives him another smile.)
*BU*: You're right, Curly. The odds ARE in your favor, right now. (Billy slowly reaches into his jacket pocket) So, let's even things out a bit, eh?
(Billy quickly pulls a stun gun out of his jacket pocket and shoves it up to Mr. Big's stomach. He pulls the trigger and zaps Mr. Big, who immediately doubles over in pain. Billy grabs Big by the head and throws him out of the ring between the ropes. He then turns back to Curly, who's standing in the middle of the ring with a dumfounded look on his face. Billy takes off his leather jacket and hangs it on one of the ring posts. The ref from the last match slides back into the ring and calls for the bell.)
*BELL RINGS*
(Immediately, Billy Ubermark charges at Curly Long, who takes off running. Curly slides under the ring ropes and starts booking ass around the ring. Billy slides under the ring ropes, as well, and starts giving chase. The crowd laughs as the two do a lap around the outside of the ring. Finally, Curly manages to slide back into the ring and get to his feet. Billy follows him into the ring with a slide, too, but Curly catches him with a couple of quick boots to the face that stun Billy while he's still on the canvas. Curly quickly drops down on top of Billy, grabs him around the neck and tries to execute a modified Crippler Crossface on him. Billy quickly gets his feet on the bottom rope, and the ref forces Curly to get off of Billy.)
(Curly gets up, and Billy starts getting to his feet but Curly reaches up while he's still hunched over and gives Ubermark a rake to the eyes. Billy turns around holding his face, and Curly runs up behind him and connects with a modified Bulldog. Curly gets on top of Billy and tries to get him into the Curly Clutch. Billy struggles, however, and eventually stands up with Curly still hanging onto Billy's back. Curly adjusts his move and tries for a Sleeper Hold. Billy staggers around for a couple seconds to get his balance, and then counters Curly by falling straight backwards on top of him. Curly is stunned by the move and releases his hold. Billy rolls around for a second, trying to get his breath. Eventually, he gets on his feet, followed quickly by a dazed Curly. Billy grabs Curly a connects with a snap suplex. Billy quickly sits Curly up. He sizes Curly up, and then nails him with a dropkick to the back of the head. Curly snaps forwards, and then falls onto his back. Billy goes for a cover.)
1....2... Curly kicks out.
(Billy mutters something under his breath about Curly as he gets to his feet. He grabs Curly by one ear and pulls him to a standing position. Billy whips Curly into one of the turnbuckles, then tries following up with a Monkey Flip. At the last moment, Curly ducks and Billy leaps onto the turnbuckle. Curly then turns around and bites Billy on the ass while Billy's hanging onto the ropes. Billy screams and curses as the crowd gets another good laugh. Eventually, Billy kicks back with one of his legs and shoves Curly back. Billy turns and shoots for a dropkick from the middle rope on Curly. He connects and Curly goes stumbling backwards into the ref. Curly's head colides with the ref's groin and the ref, who obviously forgot his cup, doubles over in pain and falls to the ground.)
(Billy pays no attention to the fallen ref. He grabs Curly off the canvas, sets him up, and connects with a modified pump-handle slam. Billy quickly gets off Curly and climbs to the top of one of the ringposts. He signals for a Frog Splash, but suddenly Mike Hodgson of the Nyrds jumps out of the crowd and slides into the ring. He stands in front of Curly and starts taunting Billy Ubermark. Billy points at Mike and shouts for him to get out of the way. While Billy is arguing, he doesn't see Joel Nelson run in from behind him. Joel sneaks up and knocks Billy's legs out from under him. Billy straddles the top rope and lands on his crotch. The crowd laughs and cheers as Billy's face turns to a mask of extreme pain as he grabs at his groin, while sitting on the top rope. The Nyrds slide out of the ring and laugh and point as they run back up the asile to watch the rest of the match from a safe distance.)
(As Billy is perched upon the top rope. Curly Long has now recovered. He climbs up to the top rope and sets Billy up for the Curly Creamer! Curly Connects with the move and Billy is layed out in the ring. Curly goes for a cover.)
1.....2.....3!
*BELL RINGS*
*ANNOUNCER*: Here is your winner of this match.... CURLY LONG!
(Curly rolls out of the ring where he is met by Mr. Big who is still holding his stomach. The two of them make their way to the back area with Curly raising his hand in victory. Back in the ring, Billy Ubermark rolls on the ground, half-dazed and still holding his groin. Back on the ring ramp, the two Nyrds celebrate as the crowd starts a chant of "Nyrds! Nyrds! Nyrds!" and the screen fades to black.)
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Post by #Classic Hi-Definition X on Feb 21, 2006 14:40:58 GMT -5
*We come back from commercial and are ringside. The fans are all riled up when the "Sexy Guy" theme plays*
Oh oh Bret He's very cute, and super sexy...
Ring Announcer: The following contest is a #1 Contenders Tournament Match to determine the #1 contender for the EWT Heavyweight Championship. Introducing first, being accompanied by "Sensational" Cherry, weighing in at 232 lbs., the Heartbreak Hitman Bret Michaels!
*HBH walks out with Cherry by his side. They're greeted with a chorus of boos. HBH gets in the ring and does his usual posing. Then "Gas Power" plays*
RA: And his opponent, weighing in at 323 lbs., "Big Daddy" Gasoline!
*Gasoline walks out to thunderous cheers. He hi-fives fans on the way to the ring. Then he gets in the ring and raises a fist in the air. HBH is outside the ring shaking his head*
The bell rings to start the match. HBH gets back in the ring and starts trash talking to Gasoline. He shoves him. Gas shoves HBH back. HBH slaps Gas across the face. This gets an "OHHHH!" from fans and draws loud boos. Gas retaliates with a hard right hand, knocking HBH down to the mat. This gets a loud pop. Gas knocks HBH down with another hard right, and then another. Then he takes him down with a hard clothesline. Gas picks him up and gives him a gorilla press slam. Gas picks up HBH again and does a running slam. He goes for the cover.
1... 2...
HBH kicks out. Gas gets him to his feet and takes him to the corner. He bangs his head on the turnbuckle 10 times. The fans count along. HBH stumbles backward and into a reverse vertical suplex. Gas goes for the cover again.
1... 2...
HBH again kicks out. Gas again takes HBH to the corner. He connects with a bunch of kicks, punches, and elbows. Next he runs at him for a splash, but HBH moves out of the way at the last second, leaving Gas to hit the turnbuckle. HBH capitalizes with a belly to back suplex pin.
1.. 2..
Gas kicks out. HBH gets up and applies a camel clutch on Gas. He breaks the hold after a few moments. He picks him, hits a few knees to the head, and performs a swinging neckbreaker. He runs to the ropes and hits a quick leg drop. Then he picks up Gas and does a slingshot suplex. Next he hits a T-Bone suplex. He goes for the pin.
1... 2...
Gas gets the shoulder up. HBH picks him up and takes him to the corner, where he stomps a mudhole in him. He then runs at Gas with a knee to the head. He mocks Gas's raising fist, which draws very loud boos. On the outside, Cherry is jumping up and down and acting all giddy. HBH picks up Gas and throws a punch. Gas throws one right back. They continue to exchange punches until Gas gets the upper hand. But HBH puts a stop to it with an eye poke. Next he hits a dropkick on Gas's right knee. Then he takes him down with a Russian leg sweep.
After a wishbone legsplitter, HBH stomps away on Gas's right leg. He continues by dragging Gas to the corner and ramming that leg into the ringpost. Next he applies a figure four leg lock around the ringpost. The ref starts counting to 5. HBH breaks it after 4. He gets back in the ring and poses to the fans, who boo and heckle him. He hits a knee drop to Gas's head and covers him.
1... 2...
Gas gets the shoulder up. HBH picks him up and performs a body slam. He climbs to the second rope. He jumps off for a diving elbow, but Gas moves out of the way. The ref starts the 10 count.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
Both men are now up. Gas blocks HBH's attempted punch and throws one of his own. Gas blocks another punch and lands one. He unleashes a flurry of punches and kicks. He whips HBH to the ropes and hits a back body drop. HBH runs at him and walks right into a sidewalk slam. Gas catapults HBH into the turnbuckle and hits him with a fallaway slam. He pins him.
1... 2...
HBH kicks out. Gas picks him up and gets him with an inverted atomic drop and then hits him with a flying lariat. He whips HBH to the ropes, looking for another back body drop, but HBH blocks it with a kick to the head. HBH takes advantage with a Rocker Dropper. Next he takes Gas to the corner and climbs the turnbuckle. He connects with a rolling powerbomb. He turns it into a pin and puts his feet on the ropes.
1... 2...
Gas kicks out. HBH kicks Gas's right leg a few times and sets up for the Sharpshooter, but Gas kicks his way out of it. HBH picks him up and kicks him in the stomach. He runs to the ropes. Gas is about to hit him with the big boot, but HBH catches it. Gas then hits HBH with an enziguri! He uses the ropes to climb to his feet. He picks up HBH and hits the Snake Eyes followed by a spinebuster. He raises a fist to signal the end of the match. The crowd pops. But suddenly, Cherry gets on the apron, distracting the ref. Gas starts walking toward her. HBH gets up and hits Gas with a low blow, but Gas isn't fazed! He hits HBH with a big boot. Next he picks him up and whips him into Cherry, who falls off the apron. Gas then sets up for the Jackknife Powerbomb and hits it. He goes for the cover.
1... 2...
3! *Bell rings*
RA: Here is your winner, "Big Daddy" Gasoline!
*The ref raises Gasoline's arm in victory and the crowd cheers on. Meanwhile HBH rolls out of the ring to check on Cherry. He gets her to her feet and walks her to the back. Gas gets out of the ring and hi-fives fans on his way to the back*
*Cut to commercial*
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Post by chanceconfidence on Feb 21, 2006 20:45:58 GMT -5
Chance Confidence is walking around the park... pretty bored.
Chance: Man... I don't know why so many people enjoy this place... it's pretty damn boring if you ask me.
He yawns and goes voer to sit down next to a bench. Next to him is, well it's Terri. She looks over at Chance who smirks to himself... leanign close and eying Terri... who backs away a bit.
Chance: Well well well... if it isn't Terri, aren't you the one that hangs around with that guy.... whatisname...
Terri: You mean Ultimo?
Chance: No... not that stupid guy who tripped over his own cape.
Terri: No I meant... Chocula.
Chance: Erm... I'm pretty sure that cartoon vampire isn't real... and if you think so, maybe you better check yourself into the funny farm or something...
Terri: ULTIMO CHOCULA!!!
Chance looks a bit wide eyed, backing up.
Chance: OHHHHHHH... that guy.
Terri lets out a loud aggravated sigh.
Chance: So... don't you want to interview me or something... I mean, it's not everyday Chance... Confidence... asks someone to do something... that's not demeaning I guess. You wouldn't believe how much people would pay just to sniff my body... whcih now that I think about it... is pretty distrubing...
Terri scoots over on the bench. Chance scoots closer. Terri scoots again... Chance scoots again... this goes on until Terri falls off the bench.
Terri: Ow! Will you leave me alone you already?!
Chance smiles
Chance: Don't be like that baby... after all, I'm not just confident in the ring... if you catch my drift.
He winks. Terri reaches into her bag and pulls out a can of pepper spray and uses it. Chance acks and covers his eyes.
Chance: YOU HARLOT!!! Why in the bloody hell did you have to do that?!
Terri walks off... as somebody else sits on the bench. Chance can't really see all too well, so he turns around.
Chance: Well... if this isn't my lucky day. Tell me... think you'd like to come back to my place... so we can... you know?
The person looks at Chance
Person: What... for milk and cookies? I LOVE milk and cookies... except the chcocolate chips ones... too squishy.
Chance hears the familiar voice of Sum Guy and practically jumps backwards, falling off the bench and on his ass. Chance: What the hell are you doing so close to me you freak?!
Sum Guy: I thought you were a cushion.
Chance: A... a CUSHION!!! You're brain is a damn cushion you mental patient!!!
Chance storms off to get ready for his match with A Bomb... tripping over various stuff since he's kinda blind still as Sum Guy watches him leave.
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Post by paulpodanski on Feb 21, 2006 21:43:07 GMT -5
Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and it is a Second Round match in the EWT #1 Contendors Tournament.
Stricken bv Disturbed hits the Toomitron and Koda Kazar heads down to the ring to a pretty nice pop.
Announcer: From Oklahoma City Oklahoma, weighing in at 200 pounds, Koda Kazar!!!
Koda gets a pretty nice pop from the crowd despite having only been in the EWT for a short time. He does his usual ring entrance and gets into the ring.
The crowd pop gets even louder as Let the Bodies Hit the Floor starts up and Koda's opponents steps out onto the stage.
Announcer: And the opponent... from Birmingham Alabama, wieghing in at 312 pounds... he is the Self Proclaimed Drunken Demon... Paul Podanski!!!
Paul quickly heads down to the ring, climbing inside and looking at Koda... Koda looking back at him. The two walk to the center of the ring, staring at each other, of couse... Koda having to look up... and in a show of pure sportsmanship... they shake hands. The crowd pops as they back up from each other... and the bell rings. They lock up... Paul quickly overpowering Kazar... pushing him back... he gives him a kick to the gut, causing Koda to hunch over... then lifts him up and slams him to the mat with a scoop slam. Kazar groans, slwoly rising to his feet... Paul charging forward and clocking him in the jaw with a boot to the face. He goes for the first cover of the match. 1....2
Koda kicks out. Paul looks down at him and leaps up, for a leg drop to the throat, but Kazar rolls out the way quickly. Paul groans a bit as he lands... struggling quickly to his feet as Koda beats him there. He leaps up and nails Paul with a dropkick to the face... sending him staggering backwards... then follows it up with a quick sweep kick taking him down to the mat. Paul goes down as Koda leaps up and nails a moonsault splash... into a cover of his own. 1....2...
Paul powers out... sending Koda flying across the mat, but he still manages to land on his feet. Podanski gets to his own, charging at Koda for a stiff clothesline, but Koda ducks underneath... quickly rolling Paul up in a school boy for another pin attempt! 1....2...
But again Paul escapes. He looks at Koda... who looks right back. Koda starts to assault Paul with some stiff kicks to his legs... his chest... his sides, Paul groaning in pain and stumbling backwards as he does so... he finishes things up with a wheel kick, but Paul catches him and turns it into a powerbomb!!! Koda hits the mat hard as Paul goes for the pin. 1....2....
But Koda manages to get the shoulder up. Paul looks down at him, pretty impressed by this kid. He lifts him to his feet, than starts to lay into him with some stiff fists, Koda too dazed to do anything, as each connects... he staggers back a bit until he's backed into the corner of a turnbuckle. Paul looks at the crowd... then winds up... and pitches out a punch, nailing Koda and sending him down into the bottom corner of the turnbuckle. He then proceeds to take a page out of Austin's book and stomps a mudhole into him... Koda groaning in pain as Paul continues laying into him with his feet.
Eventually Paul finishes up... lifting Koda up and setting him into a tree of woe. He then backs up... charging forward and going for a powerful knee to the gut perhaps, but Koda again manages to resist, flipping him self out of the tree of woe and facing backwards on the turnbuckle, then leaping off... flipping behind him and nailing him with an A.J. Styles style Reverse DDT to the mat! The crowd pops massively as Koda immediately drops down for the cover on Paul. 1.....2.....
NO!!! Paul manages to get the shoulder up. Koda looks a bit surprised... as well as weakened. He slowly rises to his feet... waiting for Paul to do so. As he does... he immediately goes for the PELE!!! But Paul out of instinct catches him while he's upside down by his waist and nails a nasty looking piledriver counter!!! Podanski groans and goes for another cover of his own. 1.....2.....
Again NO!!! This time Koda manages to get the shoulder up. Paul grabs his head in a bit of frustration... slowly rising once again... then backing up and leaping up, going for the senton... but again... Koda rolling out of the way... then leaping up with a dropkick, this time to the side of his skull. Podanski groans going back down once again. Koda once again gets to his feet... shaking off the cobwebs He gets to his feet... climbing up onto the top turnbuckle... and leaping off... going for Rib Surgery!!!
But Paul gets his knees up... smashing them against Koda's own ribs. Kazar yelps out loudly in pain, gripping them and rolling off of Paul. Paul drapes an arm over him for yet another cover. 1.....2....
Once again... Koda resists... getting the shoulder up once again. Paul groans... rolling off to the side... as both men try to rise to their feet, the referee countign them both.
1......
2......
3.....
4.....
5.....
6....
7....
The two both get to their feet... Paul getting there first. They stare each other down... then immediately lock up. Koda goes behind Podanski... trying to go for some kind of roll up bridge... but Paul's just too heavy. Paul grabs him from behind, flipping him off his back and hard into the mat. But as he does... Koda grabs Paul's neck and takes him down with him... with a DDT! Paul's head bounces up off the mat... then goes back down. Koda out of desperation... nips up to his feet, to another nice pop. As Koda tries to recover some stamina... Paul manages to sit up... Kazar notcing him do so and charging forward, going for the shining wizard. However... Paul rolls off to the side... Kazar instead hitting nothing but air. He lands on his feet, a bit out of breath.
Paul meanwhile rises back up. Koda charges forward... big mistake. Paul grabs him and nails a Manhattan Drop... Koda gasping as he feels quite a bit of pain in his " lower area " He holds his parts as Paul backs up and takes him down to the mat with a stiff lariat... sending him for a loop... literally! Podanski begins to signal for the end... crossing his throat. He stalks Koda... waiting for him to rise up once again... and he eventually does so. Paul then hoists him up high... and starts spinning... 1...2...3...4...5....6...7...8...9..10!!! Paul takes Koda out... slamming him down hard with the Paulerbomb and into the cover. 1.....2....
3!!! This one's over and done with.
Announcer: Here is your winner... who will advance to the next round... Paul Podanski!!!
Paul groans... getting back to his feet, slowly exitting the ring and heading backstage... after this pretty hard fought match.
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Post by Ultimo Chocula on Feb 21, 2006 21:59:27 GMT -5
Lillian: "The following contest is a second round, number one qualifier for the EWT World Title!"
("Look At This Face" comes on and the crowd is in full boo mode. Ultimo comes out in his special solid gold tights with Moniqua at his side. He struts down the ramp like he doesn't hear the negative reaction from the fans. He opens the ropes for Moniqua then follows her in. He goes to grab the microphone for his typical pre-match diatribe but is cut off by "Heaven's A Lie". Virus comes out from the back and doesn't look to be in any mood to messing around. He gets into the ring and growls at UC. UC is already pointing at Virus and talking trash even as Lillian is making his introduction. The music dies down and the bell rings, we're underway.
UC and Virus get right up in each other's mug, UC babbling the whole time. Virus isn't having it and pie faces UC down to his caboose. UC springs up and gets right up in Virus's business. Virus's short temper just got shorter and he shoves UC over to the ropes. UC charges back and shoves Virus. Virus uncorks a huge fist right into UC's face. UC hits the deck and Virus is right on top of him with a series of punches to UC's face. Virus gets up and UC rolls out of the ring. Moniqua rushes up to him to survey the damage to his precious face. UC lets Moniqua examine his face as Virus, in the ring, gets tired of waiting and reaches over, grabbing UC by the hair and yanking him up to the ring apron. Virus suplexes UC back in the ring then hits a running elbow drop. Virus sends UC in the ropes and hits him with a big boot, intent on screwing up UC's profile. Virus points to the turnbuckles and the crowd cheers. Virus scoops UC up by the back of the head and pounds his face in the turnbuckles for the customary ten times. UC falls onto his back and rolls out of the ring again. A very concerned Moniqua goes to check on UC's face again, then turns to Virus to shout at him. Virus rolls out of the ring and blasts UC with a big forearm shot to the chest as Moniqua runs for cover. Virus whips UC into the guardrail the follows up with a Samoan Drop right onto the concrete. Virus gets back into the ring and raises his arm, sensing that he's about to advance in the tournament. UC staggers up to his feet slowly makes it up to the ring apron. Virus sees this and charges at UC, hoping to knock him off the apron. UC suddenly drops down, grabbing the top rope, and it sends Virus flying over the top and down to the concrete. UC gets into the ring, hits the ropes, and flies over the top himself, taking Virus out with a Cannonball Run.
UC collects himself before stomping on Virus a couple of times then sending him back into the ring. UC gets back in himself and begins yelling at Virus, something about "keep yer dirty mitts off the merchandise!" UC sends Virus into the ropes and goes for a dropkick, but Virus knocks it away and when UC gets up to his feet is greeted with a big clothesline. Virus elbows UC in the back of the head and whips him into the turnbuckles. Virus charges in with a knee lift but UC dodges it, sending Virus crashing his knee right into the turnbuckle. Virus staggers out of the corner as UC hits the ropes and clips Virus's knee out from under him. Virus grabs his injured knee and UC capitalizes. UC stomps away on the injured limb, then takes the leg and slams it down to the mat. Virus rolls around the ring in pain as UC flicks his sweat on Virus's face. UC takes Virus's leg and does the Mr. Perfect Knee Snapper causing Virus to scream out in pain. UC locks Virus in a half crab, hoping to wear out Virus's bad knee. Virus is paying but he has no intention of tapping out. Two minutes in the move Virus starts to fight his way out of it. Virus manages to flip UC up and over breaking the hold. Virus has to use the ropes to get himself up to a vertical base but UC was just waiting for him and dropkicks Virus in the bad knee. Virus hits the deck again and UC positions him where he wants him. UC climbs up to the top rope and executes a Knee-Sault right onto Virus' injured leg. UC signals for the end as Moniqua claps on her protege. UC waits for Virus to stand up to execute the Sugar Fix when suddenly....
"I'm Too Sexy" comes over the PA to everyone's shock. Everyone's wondering what's going on but it turns into a huge pop when out comes Mike Hodgson decked out in a black turtle neck, beret, and a mustache drawn on with a Sharpie. He's carrying a camera with the biggest lens ever seen. Following behind him is Joel Nelson, decked out in the pinstriped suit that he stole from UC's locker. Joel begins to strike poses as Mike takes his picture. The two Nyrds are really getting into it as they make their way down the ramp, Joel making exaggerated poses all the way as Mike clicks the camera. Joel then starts posing with various audience members, Mike right there to capture the moment. Everyone is having a blast with the Nyrds...........except....
UC, who was watching the whole thing, is super pissed off and muttering to himself. The Nyrds are by the ring, still doing the camera bit, when UC hits the ropes and flies over the top with the Cannonball Run. But the Nyrds move out of the way sending UC crashing on the concrete. UC staggers up to his feet when Mike walks up to take UC's picture. Suddenly the brightest flashbulb goes off right in UC's face, blinding him and sending him wandering around the ring. Mike and Joel grab UC by his gold britches and throw him into the ring. Still blinded UC tries to get his bearings. He turns around and Virus is right there kick him in the stomach and then blasts UC with the Infection. Virus makes the cover.)
1......... 2........ 3!
Lillian: "Here is your winner, Virus!"
(The Nyrds jump and down celebrating and take off towards the back. Virus stands up but is still nursing a bum knee. The referee raises his arm and Virus makes the belt motion with his hands. Moniqua gets into the ring and checks on UC, who's down and out.)
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Doomrider
Hank Scorpio
I wanna bang Marla.
Posts: 6,058
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Post by Doomrider on Feb 21, 2006 22:50:29 GMT -5
-=Scene=- We open the scene with Julio Gagcia adjusting her sombrero and putting down her taco at ringside. She picks the microphone off of the mat as the camera closes up on her.
-=Julio Gagcia=- Ladies and gentleman, this next match is your main event, and a Round 2 match for the EWT Heavyweight title tournament!
-=Scene=- “Broken Wings” begins as a large flapping creature makes his way onto the ramp.
-=Julio Gagcia=- Making his way to the ring…weighing in at 272 pounds…CRAUSWELL!!!!
-=Scene=- Crauswell flaps his way to the ring and gets in. He climbs a turnbuckle and signals to the crowd. He jumps down and the lights go out. The pearly gates of heaven are on the Toomitron aflame. The opening roar of Mastodon’s “Crusher Destroyer” begins and the lights return as the song continues with Deron standing in the ring with his arms folded. A black towel covers his face.
-=Julio Gagcia=- Ladies and gentlemen….Deron Miller!
-=Scene=- Deron throws down the towel and eyes up Crauswell. Gagcia gets out of the ring as the referee signals for the bell. The two circle each around the ring, then lock up. Crauswell rams his knee into Deron’s stomach, then irish whips him into the ropes. He connects with a large leg lariat onto Deron. Deron’s back smacks the apron and he rolls to the side. Crauswell walks over to Miller and picks him up. Deron pops Crauswell in the side of the head with a few elbows which causes him to stagger back. Crauswell falls to one knee. Deron charges at him and connects with a variation of the shining wizard. He goes for the pin.
-=Ref=- 1...
-=Scene=- Crauswell quickly kicks out. Deron angrily sits up. Crauswell is already on his feet and connects with low dropkick to the back. Deron leans forward in pain. Crauswell grabs his head and lifts him to his feet. He annihilates Deron with a serious of punches and finishes him off with a tiger suplex. Deron, out of fury and pain, rolls outside of the ring. Deron tries to walk it off, but Crauswell is behind in pursuit. He grabs Deron and irish whips him into the ringpost. Deron stumbles back from hitting the post and throws an elbow at Crauswell. Meanwhile the referee is counting.
-=Ref=- 4...5...6...
-=Scene=- Deron grabs Crauswell by his mask and rolls him into the ring. Deron climbs the apron, then the turnbuckle. He flies at Crauswell, but Crauswell catches him, lifts him up into the air, and gives him the gorilla press slam. Deron is laid out on the mat. Crauswell goes for the quick cover.
-=Ref=- 1...2...
-=Scene=- Deron kicks out last minute. An annoyed Crauswell stands up and starts arguing with the referee about how that should have been a three count. Meanwhile Deron rises to his feet and readies himself behind Crauswell. After arguing, Crauswell turns around and Deron connects with a wicked crescent kick to his beak. He charges at Crauswell who hip tosses Deron, but Deron lands on his feet in an awkward position, puts his weight towards the ground, and brings Crauswell down with a somewhat of a reverse hip toss. Deron rises to his feet and picks up Crauswell. He kicks him in his gut, hops behind him, and connects with the rear lungblower, which lays out Crauswell. Deron goes for the pin.
-=Ref=- 1...2...
-=Scene=- Crauswell kicks out. Deron sits up with a disgusted look on his face, but Crauswell, playing possum, Applies a ground variation of the cross face chicken wing on Miller! Miller is struggling to get out of the hold but he just can’t. He begins to slow down as the referee is right next to Deron’s face.
-=Ref=- Do you give up Miller? What do you say Miller?
-=Deron Miller=- No….no….f**k no!
-=Scene=- Deron uses all of his strength to break his one leg free. He rolls onto his stomach and rises to his feet. Deron leaps back into the turnbuckle with Crauswell on his back. Crauswell releases the hold and leans into the turnbuckle. Deron, now fueled up and pissed off, points at Crauswell as if he’s trying to stare into his soul. Crauswell charges at him, but Deron kicks him in the stomach and sets him up. Deron slices his throat with his thumb as the crowd booes. He picks up Crauswell and slams him down with the Crusher. Deron manages to hop back to his feet, still holding Crauswell. He sets him up and connects with the Destroyer. Crauswell is out. Deron falls on top of Crauswell and the referee counts.
-=Ref=- 1...2...3...
-=Scene=- The bell rings as Deron rolls over onto the mat. Both men are weary and near out. The ref raises Deron’s hand, but it just falls back on the mat. The camera closes in as Gagcia announces Deron the winner, but it looks like there was no real winner in this. The camera fades on Deron’s sweaty, weary face to a Dinsey Land commercial.
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Post by Trik Turner on Feb 21, 2006 22:57:23 GMT -5
(Trik Turner is backstage sporting a second new HitmanMark shirt. Todd Girsham rushes up to him.)
Grisham: Trik, Trik!! A word with you!!
(Trik just stops & looks at Todd Grisham with a nasty look.)
Grisham: Tell me Trik, now that you're eliminated from the tournament, & HitmanMark is eliminated...what does the future hold for you? You've not only cost him the title once, but twice. And now, we don't even know if you're going to be booked at the next pay per view because of the elimination. What do you have to say to this?
(Trik just looks at Todd with a nasty look, then grabs him by the throat. Suddenly, Trik jerks Todd Grisham to the ground with a Crappler Crossface. As Todd screams, security rushes in, trying to pry Trik off of him. Finally, they achieve it as Trik gets to his feet. Trik starts to walk away as security helps Todd Grisham up. Just then, Trik turns & nails a clothesline on Todd Grisham. He then grabs Grisham's leg & sets him up for the Sharpshooter as security tries to get him off. After a minute, Trik releases the hold, looks into the camera, & walks off.)
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B.A.
Grimlock
Posts: 13,335
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Post by B.A. on Feb 21, 2006 23:15:48 GMT -5
*bell rings*
Lillian: The following contest, is a 2nd round of the EWT Heavywieght Tournament match
*Remedy plays*
Lillian: Coming down the aisle, from Washington D.C.... Eddie Omega!!
Eddie Omega walks down the aisle with his purple sunglasses on and frat shirt. He does a body building pose to the crowd and taunts them.
Eddie walks around before a horror theme of pomp and circumstance plays.
Lillian: And from ..I give you Principal Pain!!
Pain gets in the ring, and the two shake hands before the bell rings
*bell rings*
The two lock up in a collar-elbow tie up but both cant get leverage. Eddie is shaking off his arm, and they go for another tie-up but Pain pushes Omega off surprisingly. A tie-up again, and Eddie drives Pain into the turnbuckle. The ref tries for a smooth break
Ref:1...2...3...4...
Omega lets go, and hes circling around the ring. He runs into the ropes and tries to shoulderblock Pain, but no man moves. Eddie runs again, and tries another shoulderblock and no one moves again. He runs into the ropes and third time, and he ducks a the prinicipal's clothesline, and leap frogs over Pain but Pain does a flying elbow into Omega. Pain picks Omega up, irish whips him and delivers a knee to the gut. Pain begins to stomp Eddie as the action starts to pick up. Omega, punches Pain and irish whips him and catches him for a belly to belly but Pain reverses it into an arm drag and does another one win Omega gets up. Pain goes for a suplex, but Omega reverses it and does a suplex of his own. Both men are trying to get leverage while Omega tries to pick him up, but Pain uses his legs to push Omega off, then Omega does the same. Both men get to their feet with clenched fists.
*Crowd cheers for a good job*
Eddie is smiling while acknowledging his skill. A test of strenght but eddie gets the under hand with a cheap kick and chops Pain down with a knife edge. He picks Pain up and does another kinfe edge. Throwing pain into the ropes, he catches him and does a belly to belly. Omega looks around, and sits Pain up. The crowd hasnt seen this in a while. He kicks his back, slaps his chest and finishes the Frat Step Attack while delivering a back splash. Quick pin...
Ref: 1...2..
Pain kicks out and Eddie picks him up, but gets a firemans carry down to him. Pain then realized the achilles heel of Omega. He stops his arm, and Eddie yells in Pain.
*Crowd cheers* Pain then works on the arm more getting eddie in an Armbar, as Eddie is looking for a way out. He crawls to the rope but Pain wont let go...
Ref:1...2...3..
Pain lets go as eddie is clutching his arm. Pain picks Eddie up and throws him into the ropes and locks in a sleeper. Eddie is fading, slowly as Pain adds leverage by leaning over Eddie. But wait... Eddie picks pain up and drives him into the ropes, and throws his arms over the ropes. He begins the Pledges but Pain catches Omegas leg and clotheslines his head off. Omega is in pain, and Principal Pain is is getting up. He picks Eddie up and knees him. Pain does a suplex to Omega, and gets up quickly. He picks Omega up again and does another suplex. But Pain picks him up again..but this time, unbelieveably suplexs Omega outside the ring. Omega is hurt badly
Ref: 1....2...3...4..5...6...7...8..
Omega crawls in the ring, and Pain signals for the end. He picks him up, does The Suspender to Eddie, but he doesnt pin him.
*Crowd is individually saying pin him!!* Eddie is out of it, and Pain wants to do more damage. He goes for another Suspender but Omega does a small package...
Ref:1...2..
Pain kicks out and Omega gets a resurge of energy, as he picks Pain up and begins punching him. He gets up and does a back body suplex to Pain. Omega does his own suplex, but Pain holds onto the ropes and punches Eddie in the kidneys and begins to work on that arm. Both men go into the corner, and Pain sets Omega on the ropes and begins to punch him. What is Pain doing??!?
Pain lifts Eddie up, and looks to be going for a Super Tiger Suplex but Eddie is fighting it off. However, Pain locks the arms but Eddie breaks it. Eddie lifts Pain by the legs on the top rope, and twists in the mid air to deliver the Omega Psi Slamma to Pain!!
*Crowd: holy s*** holy s*** *
Both men are in a heap. But Omega has his injured arm on top of Pains shoulder, and the ref after 15 seconds, realizes this and counts..
Ref:1....2....3..
The crowd erupts as both men, are completely oblivious.
Lillian: And heres your winner....Eddie Omega!
Eddie picks his head up and the ref is seen as trying to wake him up. Eddie sits up and is clutching his arm. He goes over to check on Pain and see if he's ok, and Pain wakes up. Both men get to their feet and shake hands.
The replay shows both men what happened as Eddie hooks Pain into a belly to belly and twists in mid air landing awkwardly. Both men acknowledge the crowds cheers and head backstage as Omega helps to carry him.
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Post by *"@-BoMb" R.I.P Deus/Dinobot on Feb 22, 2006 1:37:40 GMT -5
*The camera goes backstage to Chance getting ready for his match in the locker room.*
*Cuts to A-Bomb outside of the locker room. A-Bomb jams a broom in the door handles and pushes a box in front of the door.*
*Chance goes to open the door.*
Chance:Hey!? What the hell!? Somebody let me out of here!! The door is stuck! *bangs on the door and continues screaming*
*A-Bomb smirks and walks towards the stage entrance*
*The fans boo as he walks down the ramp and steps in the ring. He climbs in the ring looking cocky and awaits the arrival of his opponent.*
*Chance's music plays for about a minute and nobody comes out.*
*The ring announcer grabs the mic*
*If Chance doesn't make it down to the ring. A-Bomb will be winner by count out.*
*The ref counts as the fans count along 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10*
Announcer:The winner of the match by count out...A-BOMB. *Ref raises his arm as the fans boo and his music plays*
*He walks back to the backstage area and is met by Stevie Richards.*
Stevie:What the hell is your problem?
A-Bomb:Problem what problem?
Stevie:You grabbed the ropes last week and screwed me out of my match and then you just trapped a guy in his locker room.
A-Bomb:I didn't do that. Why would I do such a thing?
Stevie:Nobody else was facing Chance tonight...so why would anyone else lock him in there?
A-Bomb:I don't know you know how the boys like to rib one another....maybe he had it coming to him.
Stevie:How dare you cheat me out of a match and then lie to me!? I've had enough of your s***!
A-Bomb:What!?
Stevie:I'll show you...you'll see! *walks away*
A-Bomb:Come on....baby! *sighs and frowns for a sec and then looks up and grin*
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Ragnal
Game Genie
Yanno what they say: All toasters toast El Dandy
Posts: 8,677,836
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Post by Ragnal on Feb 22, 2006 2:45:28 GMT -5
*Joe Ragnal is in the Disneyland infirmary, with an ice pack to his head.*
MIKE: I told you.
JOE: Shaddup. Just because I was hitting on Cinderella...
TANYA: You could have at least made sure I wasn't watching!
JOE: Okay, yeah, and then I wouldn't have been hit into that tree...
MIKE: Anyway, we need to do some planning. I heard talk Curly and Big want after our titles.
JOE: Oh, come on! What's to worry about?
MIKE: Let's see...big giant black guy and a midget who's short enough to LOW BLOW?!
JOE: Right, got it, I'll shut up now.
MIKE: I think Big's our biggest worry, though. We can't hit a Ragnalrok or THunder Cracker on someone that big, so...
*The three huddle as the screen fades out*
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Post by Joel, Mike, Currently...? on Feb 22, 2006 10:17:48 GMT -5
Dr. Insaneo waits in the middle of the ring, as it’s time for his tournament match with Mike Hodgson.
It’s all about the pentiums, baby…
Mike spins out, stops, throws up his hands, and begins to do the Worm down the ramp. About mid-way, he stops, gets back on his feet, and regularly walks down the ring. Suddenly, Billy Ubermark and Ultimo Chocula run down, and they knock him down from behind. They first stomp down on him on the ramp, and then pull him up. They both drag him to the guard rails at ring side, and they pick him up and drop him across the rails. Joel runs down to save his buddy, but Billy drop toe holds him right into the rails. Chocula picks Joel up, and Russian Leg Sweeps him into the rails. They turn their attention back to Mike, who by this time is fighting back, but they quickly silence that with a double clothesline. They drag him back up, and they both push him straight into the ring post. Mike’s forehead begins to dribble with blood, and they toss him into the ring.
The crowd is booing madly, but the Handsome Boys don’t care. Chocula and Billy roll in after Mike, and Billy gets down on one knee, jutting his other knee up. Chocula picks up Mike for what would appear to be a suplex, but Chocula falls into a gordbuster, landing Mike’s chest right across Billy’s extended knee. When they leave, Dr. Insaneo finally makes his move, and hooks Mike’s leg. Three seconds later, the match is over.
Jeremy Borash: The winner, and moving onto the next round of the tournament, Dr. Insaneo!
The crowd boos, but more for what the Handsome Boy Modeling School have done. Joel slides into the ring, and sees to Mike. He looks at Chocula and Billy, walking up the ramp, bowing to the crowd with each boo, and we go to commercial.
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Maelstrom
AC Slater
The Tide Will Turn!
Posts: 236
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Post by Maelstrom on Feb 22, 2006 12:01:55 GMT -5
Maelstrom is slowly wandering back to the Aquarium when Sum Guy turns catches up with him for an interview
SUM GUY: Hi I'm Sum Guy and I like to eat Oysters in bed.
MAELSTROM: .. Right, you do know that Oysters are meant to help you in bed .. not to be eaten in bed?
SUM GUY (sheepishly): Oh ..
Maelstrom palms Sum Guy away and takes the microphone .. his back and ribs are heavily bandaged
MAELSTROM: Spaz you fought well and I hope you can go on and win the tournament ... however one day when I am at 100% I'd like to see who really is the better in the ring ...
A cheer can be heard from the audience
MAELSTROM: .. Now sure I may not be 100% Healthy at the moment in fact I can tell you all I'm not ... but if that walking wall of ego thinks that I'll stop to recover then he needs to get his head examined and while he's there he can be tested for drugs too ...
The Crowd cheers whilst some smarter marks begin to chant 'Flex has Roid-Rage' ..
MAELSTROM: .. Flex, your time is coming ... like the Ocean you think you have me mastered, you think it will be a trip down the stream ... you think you'll just waltz in and out of our next match adding another notch to your victory list ... Think again! ... the ocean has a nasty way of showing a side you didn't expect! ...
The 'Maelstrom' chants are getting louder
MAELSTROM: .. at the Freek Show it won't matter if I'm 100% healthy or 50% Flex ... because I don't need to beat you ... but I do intend to break you! .....
while the crowd cheers loudly, Maelstrom pauses and some blue smoke begins to rise around him and the lights dim
MAELSTROM: because .... The Tide Will Turn!!
The lights go out as we cut to a video promo for the all new: Harlot Hunt 2006 Uncut DVD!!
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,411
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Feb 22, 2006 16:40:56 GMT -5
Cut to EN Bunk getting of Thunder Mountain when he's met by....
Shawn Michaels: Chris? Is that you? Man, I didn't know you were a wrestler!
EN: Yeah, I go into it after you won your first WWE Championship win. You know, at Wrestlemania XII.
HBK: But what's with your ring name? EN Bunk?! What's up with that?
EN: Hey, hey. I was young when I started. I didn't know what to pick, so I picked EN Bunk.
HBK: Chris, man, you gotta change your ring name. I mean, how many times has your name been messed up.
EN: Now that you mention it.... a lot! Man, I should change my name. But to what?
HBK: What about your real name?
EN: Chris Michaels?
HBK: Yeah, it might work.
EN: I don't know man. I'll think about it.
HBK: Alright, I gotta get Jannetty out of jail. Somebody said that he keyed his car! Can you believe it?
EN (looking nervous): No, I can't. Look, I gotta go. Matches, all that.
HBK: Alright man. Later.
EN: See ya.
*Jannetty suddenly comes running out*
Jannetty: That's the guy that put me in jail!
HBK: What?! Hold on.
*HBK runs up to a random man and knocks him down, waiting for him to get up. SUM GUY makes it to his feet and gets blasted with the Sweet Chin Music. HBK and Jannetty leave Sum for 4 minutes before...
Sum: Disney Land is the happiest place on Earth? Yeah Right.
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Post by dorf on Feb 22, 2006 22:32:41 GMT -5
Finkel: This match is one of the Tournament for the Champions, whoever wins this, goes on to the Quarterfinals! It is scheduled for one-fall, COMING down the aisle, *“Halls of Illusion” plays by Insanse Clown Posse* weighing in at 187 pounds, from Hell Michigan, I give to you, DEAMON COHLN!
*Deamon Cohln enters the ring.*
Finkel: COMING down the aisle….*arena suddenly goes black for twenty seconds*
*After twenty seconds of darkness, a lightning bolt strikes the CrapTron, apparently. The lighting somehow comes back on and Dorf is already in the ring, with Finkel disappearing from the scene. Deamon Cohln stands there not scared of Dorf, but he is at a weight disadvantage. The timekeeper rings the bell and the match starts!*
*The two lock-up, but Dorf is too much powerful for Deamon Cohln as he uses his power to push Cohln to a corner. The referee tells to the two break-up, but none do so. The referee yells, “1! 2! 3! 4! 5!” Just as the referee is about to break up the two, but Dorf attempts to do a cheap shot. Deamon ducks under and kicks Dorf on his left knee. Dorf goes halfway down, clinching to his left knee, meanwhile Deamon is flying to the ropes for leverage at a great speed. Once Dorf looked up a speeding Deamon Cohln flinged from the ropes immediately did a Flying Clothesline at Dorf and Dorf goes down to cheers! Deamon attempts to pin Dorf in the process*
Referee: 1…………………………………………….2……………..*Dorf kicks out greatly that Deamon is sent flying across the ring.*
*Dorf gets up right away as Cohln is staggering up. The two stare at each other vehemothly as the crowd cheers with the intensity, the INTENSITY, damnit you aren’t reading the match…know what? Read this match and you’ll feel intense after reading it, with Dorfstrucity. Anyway, back to the match. The two opponents stare at each other, until the crowd died down. This is so much better than an emo spotfest. Once the crowd died down, the two ran at each other and lock-up once more. Dorf uses his strength, but stops halfway to the corner and applies a Side Headlock to Deamon Cohln. Cohln uses his strength to push Dorf to the ropes and release the Side Headlock. Cohln attempts to do an Irish Whip and is countered by Dorf into an Irish Whip of his own; once Cohln bounced back from the ropes, Dorf performed a Hip-Toss to take Cohln down. Dorf held onto Cohln by applying an Armbar to his left arm. Cohln screams in pain.*
*Dorf holds on the Armbar for another minute and somehow turns the Armbar into a Hammerlock. Cohln uses his right elbow to hit Dorf as hard as he could, so that he could escape the Hammerlock. Cohln escaped, sorta. He got Dorf dazed and tried to free himself by using speed, but caught by Dorf with a takedown with his left arm and turned it into a Shoulder hold. Cohln screams in pain somemore as he tries to think of a plot to escape. He gets up right away and tries to use his strength to escape, but once Dorf thought he was going to use strength as his escape, Cohln uses the heel of his left foot to kick into Dorf’s left knee.*
*COHLN ESCAPES!! He sprints wildly to get any offense to Dorf as he uses the ropes again to help his velocity at Dorf and performs a Five-Star Missile Drop Kick to Dorf. Cohln gets the crowd heated up when he points to the top rope. Cohln manages his way to the top rope and performs a perfected Shooting Star Press to Dorf, Cohln covers.*
Referee: 1……………………………………..2……………………………*Dorf barely kicks out!*
*Cohln signals the end as he climbs to the top rope once again. He stands on the top rope getting the crowd all hyped up for his finisher, The Crush…signaling to the crowd waiting almost impatiently for Dorf to get up. It took half a minute before got up as he stumbles to the corner where Cohln is ready for The Crush. Cohln nose-dives in the air so much to get more leverage into The Crush, that it was his finest to date….EXCEPT THAT DORF COUNTERS INTO THE AURORA BOUREALIS!! Both competitors are down as the crowd is getting riled up of what just happened. The referee starts his 10 count.*
Referee: 1…2…3…4 *Dorf is crawling to Deamon Cohln*..5 *Dorf covers!*
Referee: 1…………………………………..2……………………………..*Cohln barely kicks out*
*Dorf starts to get up slowly, knowing he wasted so much time to easily win this match. Dorf knew he has the match in hand now, as he signals to the crowd that now is the end for good. Dorf drags Cohln’s body to a corner and climbs to the second turnbuckle. Dorf looks to finish Cohln off with a Dorf Driver as David Adams suddenly has a microphone to try to get Dorf’s attention*
Adams: What’s up, Dorf? Me, not much. I’ve come to watch your match…I also brought my buddy, Webster. *Webster sets up a lawn chair for Adams to sit to the side, underneath the CrapTron and a little table* You see Dorf? You’re not even close of finishing the match, because I expect to be entertained, by gawd…I’m not entertained *sits on lawn chair* until I get my iced tea.
*Dorf ignores Adams and starts the Dorf Driver, but Cohln holds onto Dorf and counters the Dorf Driver into a Hurricanrana of his own! Both competitors are down as the referee starts his 10 count. Adams sips his iced tea and starts talking again.*
Adams: *Smiling* Now, I’m entertained Dorf. Great iced tea ya got there Webby. *Webster just smiles and nods at Mr. Adams; the referee just yelled four as nobody is really moving* You’re not championship material, Dorf…oh god no. You as World Heavyweight Champion *coughs, then sips Iced Tea*….sucked.
*By the count of six, Dorf staggers his way up and sees that his enemy is making Dorf lose focus in this match, because Cohln is already up on the top rope of the corner and grabs Dorf to execute a Top Rope Bulldog to Dorf. Adams just laughs at this, as he is easily entertained. Webster just agrees with Adams and laughs along. The crowd is also having some kicks at this as well. Cohln shows that he has enough of this as he goes to the top rope, to signal the end again to Dorf. Dorf gets up slowly, as Adams is quiet for Cohln’s offensive advantage.*
*Dorf staggers and turned around to the corner where Cohln is already flying at Dorf to perform The Crush and completed it, into a pin, BUT IT IS COUNTERED BY DORF INTO A PIN OF HIS OWN!!*
Referee: 1………………………………………….2………………………………..*COHLN KICKS OUT!*
Adams: DAMN, Dorf…your not making this match fun. I thought the little guy had you there…oh well, guess I have to make ‘it’ worth my while then. *Sips iced tea and places microphone on his temporary table. Adams gets up off of his lawn chair takes his good ‘ole time down the aisle.
*Meanwhile, Cohln gets up right away as Dorf is still down from The Crush’s affects to him. Dorf gets up part-way as Cohln sprints at Dorf to give a Running Enzigiri to Dorf and covers him*
Referee: 1……………………………………….2……………………………*Dorf somehow kicks out!*
*Adams finally made it to the apron of the ring and the referee saw him, as Adams climbed to the Apron and argued with the referee and he told him, “I need to watch the match ‘closer.’” The referee warned him of interference. Deamon Cohln goes up to the top rope and performs a Frog Splash to Dorf and executes it nicely. Cohln signals the end is for good when he points to the closest 2nd Turnbuckle. Cohln drags Dorf to the corner as Adams has a greedy smile on with him, supporting Cohln on finishing Dorf.*
*Cohln climbs to the second turnbuckle and made Dorf as Cohln is about to perform the Quad-DT to Dorf. Cohln executes the half-spin perfectly, but DORF COUNTERS INTO A SPINEBUSTER! Dorf gets up right away showing that the end is near as Dorf looks he will be trying the Dorf Buster; in the process of Irish Whipping Cohln, Cohln inadvertently knocks out the referee in the process. Dorf Irish Whips Cohln again, and this he CONNECTS WITH THE DORF BUSTER!! Dorf covers, but sees the referee is down, so he is upset at everything.*
*Dorf gets up to walk toward the referee to ‘wake’ him up, but Adams silently came in out of nowhere and performed an Inverted DDT. Adams then drug Dorf to the corner and picked him up to the top rope. Adams goes up to the top rope and performs The Crowning Achievement! Adams wasn’t done yet, oh no…he made Dorf get up and Irish Whipped him to the ropes and once Dorf flinged back around, Adams did a scary Back Body Drop to what it looks like to knock Dorf out for good. Adams walks over to Cohln, who is still down and told him to ‘finish him.’ Cohln gets right up and drags Dorf to the corner, as Adams leaves the ring.*
*Cohln goes up the second turnbuckle and perfectly executes the Quad-DT. It was one of his best rotations to date as he covers Dorf. The referee starts to move slowly and turns around to see Deamon Cohln covering Dorf. The referee starts to count.…slowly. Adams leaves the ring, because he doesn’t like to be spoiled.*
1
2
3!
Winner: by pinfall, DEAMON COHLN!
*Deamon Cohln slowly gets up as Jacola and Sever Cohln runs to the ring to celebrate. Deamon stands up exhausted and his brothers carry him out of the ring. Dorf lays in the ring knocked out mainly by Adams’ offense. The Cohlns make it up the ramp where the mystery women is standing. She tries to move towards Deamon but Sever puts his arm out to block her. The women slaps Sever and the crowd cheers. Jacola moves her and the Cohlns make there way out leaving the women there as the camera fades out for commerical.*
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Spyke the Pacers Fan
El Dandy
Still hates himself for missing the last episode of Murder She Wrote
Go Indiana!
Posts: 8,061
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Post by Spyke the Pacers Fan on Feb 22, 2006 22:44:49 GMT -5
(A local Anaheim hospital is shown, with Spyke Johannson and Minnie Mouse walking into the parking lot.
*Dok Hendrix runs up to Spyke and Minnie.*
Dok: Spyke, how are you feeling after that hellacious beating Dr. Insaneo put on you a few days ago?
Spyke: I feel great! *does backflip* Dr. Insaneo is gonna have to do a whole hell of a lot more to keep me down!
Dok: Well, we've been having difficulty reaching Dr. Insaneo for comment as to why he attacked you. Do you have any idea why?
Spyke: No idea, Dok. No idea. I'm not sure why he would have any problems with-- excuse me...
*Spyke answers his phone*
Spyke: Hello? Yeah. Yeah, I feel fine. OK. I'll be there as soon as I can. *Hangs up* I have to get back to the park, I have a match with Disco Inferno.
Dok: Wait! Spyke! One more question!
Spyke: Yeah?
Dok: What's with you and Minnie Mouse?
Spyke: *looks at Minnie* Noth-ing... nothing at... all. Excuse me we have to go.
*Spyke grabs Minnie by the hand and get into a car and drive off. Dok Hendrix looks confused.*
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Post by paulpodanski on Feb 22, 2006 23:38:40 GMT -5
Paul Podanski is standing by... celebrating his recent win by chugging down multiple bottles of beer. He starting to get drunk... no surprise there. Suddenly... Mean Gene walks up.
M.G.: Paul Podanski... you have been pretty dominant in this tournament... destroying the Dynamite Kid and ending Koda Kazar's undefeated streak! I've gotta ask you... do you think you have a chance to get a shot at the EWT Championship?
Podanski belches in Gene's face... then looks at him.
Paul: Mean Gene... I've been in the EWt for nearly a year now... I came in about the same time as Limey did... and Maelstrom too, but he's already out, so that doesn't really matter. I'm pumped and ready. I've been waiting for an opportunity to get into the main title hunt... and now I think I'm almost there. All I have to do is keep my streak going... and I gurantee that I will do just that. Paraslice... you can keep that Toolshed title... because Paul Friggin Podanski is going for the biggest prize of em all... the EWT Heavyweight Championship.
Gene: But Paul... do you think you're really worthy of it? I mean... your wrestling skills aren't that great... you're also fat and out of shape.
Paul: Hey... you got a thing against fat people?! Well lemme tell you somethin... you better shut your damn mouth or I'll do it for ya! I am on the path to greatness and there ain't nothing that's gonna stand in my way... not Parasliuce... not the Psychadeli... not Dr. Insaneo... not Daemon Colhn... not Mini Me... not Spaz... NOBODY!!! Now get outta here... before I puke all over that suit of yours.
Mean Gene eeks and runs off quickly. Paul belches again and crashes down onto the floor... passed out and still drunk.
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Post by Chrysta on Feb 23, 2006 3:24:59 GMT -5
*Ms. White and Chrysta are in the Disney backstage area, Ms. White's arms wrapped around Chrysta's body, her head nuzzled on her shoulder, while Chrysta is looking down a list.*
White: You know, Chrysta, I wish you'd finally go for that Girl Next Door title. You've been here long enough to earn it. Heck, you've even beaten Oceanic.
Chrysta: While that may stand, Ms. White, that was only due to a disqualification on Dear Linda's part. Otherwise, I have already defeated the Cow. Our Protege. Ms. Saucy. Dear Linda. And on technical terms, Oceanic. Out of all these established women, however, there is only one name left on my list before I go for the title.
White: Who's that, baby?
*Chrysta circles a name on her list.*
Chrysta: The one they call Rosa.
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Post by kokobware3 on Feb 23, 2006 14:17:13 GMT -5
*Dr. Insaneo is shown getting into his car in the parking lot of Disney Land*
Mean Gene- Dr Insaneo...why have did you attack Spyke?
Dr. Insaneo- Why? Because he comes into EWT and think he is all that. With all thoose damn dance moves and such. He is a disgrace to EWT and should not be allowed.
MG- But the fans love him...
DI (cutting him off)- Exactly! When I get no respect from anyone in this busines Not even one soul knows who I am. And now I can show the fans, the EWt superstars, and the Whole World that I am no man to mess with...when i face "Dancing Queen" Spyke at Freak Show.
MG- Dont forget Doc that it is a no dq match.
DI- I know, I know i can showcase how Insane i am to the whole dam world!
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Post by craigkendo on Feb 23, 2006 14:38:44 GMT -5
*Ivory's bizarre music plays as the bell calls for a match. Ivory makes her way out, and appeals to the fans.*
Chimel: The following contest is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, from Torrence, California...IVORY!!!!!
*Ivory appeals to the fans, and slides into the ring, throwing her arms up in her special taunt.*
*The lights dim...and "Ich Will" hits. Spotlights pan to the entranceway, where Holly Vaughn appears. She is clad in her torn trenchcoat, and is accompanied by Tony Chang. Holly drops to one knee, and holds her hands out in prayer, before suddenly rising. Tony Chang applauds her as she suddenly rushes to the ring.*
Chimel: Aaaand her opponent, from Winn...
*Holly is already in the ring, and she charges Ivory, catching her with a crossbody! Holly lands on her knees, and applies a front armbar to Ivory, before leaping to the air and hitting a devastating knee to the face of Ivory! Holly then rises to her feet, and looks over at Tony Chang, who develops a smirk. Chang then reaches under the ring, and pulls out a chair. He tosses it into the ring, and Holly catches it. Holly smacks the chair against the mat as Ivory rises...before prodding it fiercely into Ivory's gut!! Holly then drops the chair, and catches Ivory with a snap suplex onto the chair!!!*
*The ref goes over to Holly to berate her, but Holly simply knees the referee in the gut!! Holly then grabs the ref by the throat, and tosses him to the turnbuckle! Holly then rushes up the corner, and hits the ref with an enziguri!!! The ref falls to the ground as Tony Chang takes a microphone from the announce table.*
Chang: If the HEATHENS out here in the stands don't already know yet, this is but a TASTE of what the Connection, and the FROZEN CODE can do!!! It is also clear that our efforts to catch the attention of both the GND Champion...Miss OCEANIC...
*The crowd give out a pop, but Chang quickly continues to speak.*
Chang: ...and one who has avoided her TRUE CALLING, Miss Woe! As the Connection's protege, our representative Miss Woe shall enlighten those two HARLOTS in what the frozen code can do!
*At this, Holly goes over to the body of Ivory, and picks her up by the hair! Holly performs an Irish Whip to Ivory, and catches her on the rebound, planting her with the FINAL CONNECTION onto the steel chair!! Holly remains seated as the referee crawls over to her and pleads "FOR GOD'S SAKE, JUST PIN HER!!!" Holly calmly crawls over to Ivory, and goes for a casual cover.*
1, 2, 3.
Winner: Holly Vaughn.
*Post match, Holly adjusts her coat, and throws her arms out in prayer. Tony Chang enters the ring, and applauds her, before both Chang and Vaughn look down at Ivory. Chang smiles, and picks up Ivory, holding her by the hair. Holly then springs to the top rope...and leaps off onto Ivory with the DEADLY DDT...onto the STEEL CHAIR!! Ivory has been busted open as Holly casually gets to her feet! Chang and Holly then leave the ring as EMTs rush down to see to Ivory.*
*Fade out...*
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Post by #Classic Hi-Definition X on Feb 23, 2006 17:48:55 GMT -5
*We're back and at Splash Mountain. Mean Gene is with HBH and Cherry*
Mean Gene: I'm Mean Gene Okerlund here now with the Heartbreak Hitman Bret Michaels. Bret, we've just learned that you will be part of the Chamber of Horrors match at Freek Show. You will be teaming with HitmanMark and The Nyrds to take on Trik Turner, The Outlaw, and the Handsome Boy Modeling School. Your thoughts?
HBH: First off, I appreciate being chosen to take part in this match. But, I think I'm on the wrong team. I mean, HitmanMark? The Nyrds? I can't stand either of those guys, and now I'm supposed to team with them? Where's the justice in that? But if I must team with these guys, fine. Let me just make one thing clear: STAY THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY. If you don't, you'll be feeling some Sweet Chin Muzak!
MG: One of these men in the match that you'll be facing later on is the current Tri-State Champion The Outlaw in a non-title match. Your thoughts on that?
HBH: To be honest I don't have anything against The Outlaw. He's a hell of an athlete and I'm sure he'll make a great Tri-State Champion. But Outlaw, as great as you are, I'm that much better, and I'll prove it in our match.
MG: And there you have it, folks--- what the devil? Who pinched my ass?
*Cherry giggles*
MG: Cherry, did you do that?
*Cherry keeps giggling*
HBH: Ain't she a beaut, Gene?
MG: I can't argue with that. Look Cherry, the offer is intriguing and everything, but I already have a wife.
HBH: *laughs* As if someone as fine as her would hit on an old fart like yourself. Come on Cherry, let's go.
*HBH and Cherry walk off while Mean Gene has a confused look on his face*
MG: Old fart? *yells at HBH* Nothing about me is old. I'll have you know that I can go for hours on end!
*Some women pass by him, swooning*
MG: Aw, f*** it.
*Mean Gene walks off as we cut to the next segment*
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