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Post by Throwback on May 17, 2010 17:24:37 GMT -5
I've found that sometimes girls bring up other guys they like in order to test if YOU like them. girls are a tricky creature
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Post by "Playboy" Don Douglas on May 17, 2010 17:48:21 GMT -5
Have that happen to me way too often. What's worse is when they say "Why can't I find a guy just like you?" Oh, I've made girls uncomfortable after that one. It hasn't happened in a while, but I'll pause for a couple seconds and say, "Why one just like me, what's wrong with me?" They'll usually try to laugh it off, but I'll say, "No, it's a serious question, I think it's in my best interest to know. What's wrong with me?" At this point, they don't know what to say, so I say, "Okay, let's break this down. You said, 'just like me,' so obviously the problem isn't my personality, the kind of man I am. Am I too ugly for you?" That always brings about a denial, and some of them go on to tell me that I'm cute or whatever. "Okay, it's not my personality, and it's not my face. Is it my body? Hell, I'm a skinny dude, I know that ain't for everybody." Usually, this gets a denial too, but some actually admit that they like bigger guys. (In that instance, I end with, "Well then you don't want someone just like me, do you?" and go on with the day.) If they deny that's the problem, I'll say, "Okay, it's not my personality, not my face, not my body. Is it the way I dress, the way I wear my hair?" That's actually what usually catches them. I recently got a real haircut for the first time in a couple of years. For the last 2 years or so, and for a short period of time before that, I've had the duck tail haircut. Full-on "go go greased lightning," Johnny Depp in "Crybaby" greaser hair. The clothes was jeans, motorcycle boots (and jacket in proper weather) and either t-shirts, bowling shirts, or western style button up shirts. That has overwhelmingly been what seemed to turn these chicks off. So then I say, "Oh, okay, I get it - you're embarrassed to be seen in public with me. " Not in a confrontational tone, but like I'm actually understanding something for the first time. "So, basically what you're saying is, if I got a more fashionable haircut, and stopped wearing the leather jacket and boots and maybe got some nicer clothes, I'd be more appealing." At this point, they're either still uncomfortable, or actually begin to give me pointers for places I could shop or styles I could try. "Well...yeah, I think I could do that. You know? I'd just have to get used to looking at myself in the mirror every day and thinking, 'Man, I'm a pussy.' Because if I'm going to change that much about myself just so someone else will like me, that's exactly what I'll be." I've yet to hear that line from the same chick a second time.
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Post by "I'm Batman..." on May 17, 2010 17:53:25 GMT -5
yeah, girls are really tricky. i do admit to being foolish most of the time. "idk maybe..." "sure, i'll call you when i want to hang out" etc.... all b.s.
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Post by HMARK Center on May 17, 2010 21:48:17 GMT -5
I don't really get the "you're like a brother!" thing a lot, or whatever. It's either we're interested in each other, or we're not.
That said, listening to a girl talk about guys she likes can be obnoxious, but I'm sure it's obnoxious the other way around, too.
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theryno665
Grimlock
wants a title underneath the stars
Kinda Homeless
Posts: 13,571
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Post by theryno665 on May 17, 2010 22:00:26 GMT -5
Kinda in the same vein but I kinda felt bad this weekend when my friends and I all went out to a bar. One of them was a girl I'm interested in and my best friend is trying to set us up. She might be interested back but she just graduated college and isn't sure if she wants to date anyone right now. Anyway, we're hanging out and having a good time. She's drinking (I'm not) and she's starting to warm up to me, which I take as a good sign as she always seems to have her guard up. But soon, some of her male friends, who are the typical polo shirt (collars surprisingly down) and hat kind of guys come in and she ends up chatting with them and ignoring us. I kinda felt like if they never came in, I might've had a better shot.
But yeah, I always get the "You're so nice!" or "You're a good friend!" or "Why can't I meet a guy like you?" excuses. And I'm sick of them.
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Post by elmstreetkid on May 17, 2010 22:19:58 GMT -5
Oh, I've made girls uncomfortable after that one. It hasn't happened in a while, but I'll pause for a couple seconds and say, "Why one just like me, what's wrong with me?" They'll usually try to laugh it off, but I'll say, "No, it's a serious question, I think it's in my best interest to know. What's wrong with me?" At this point, they don't know what to say, so I say, "Okay, let's break this down. You said, 'just like me,' so obviously the problem isn't my personality, the kind of man I am. Am I too ugly for you?" That always brings about a denial, and some of them go on to tell me that I'm cute or whatever. "Okay, it's not my personality, and it's not my face. Is it my body? Hell, I'm a skinny dude, I know that ain't for everybody." Usually, this gets a denial too, but some actually admit that they like bigger guys. (In that instance, I end with, "Well then you don't want someone just like me, do you?" and go on with the day.) If they deny that's the problem, I'll say, "Okay, it's not my personality, not my face, not my body. Is it the way I dress, the way I wear my hair?" That's actually what usually catches them. I recently got a real haircut for the first time in a couple of years. For the last 2 years or so, and for a short period of time before that, I've had the duck tail haircut. Full-on "go go greased lightning," Johnny Depp in "Crybaby" greaser hair. The clothes was jeans, motorcycle boots (and jacket in proper weather) and either t-shirts, bowling shirts, or western style button up shirts. That has overwhelmingly been what seemed to turn these chicks off. So then I say, "Oh, okay, I get it - you're embarrassed to be seen in public with me. " Not in a confrontational tone, but like I'm actually understanding something for the first time. "So, basically what you're saying is, if I got a more fashionable haircut, and stopped wearing the leather jacket and boots and maybe got some nicer clothes, I'd be more appealing." At this point, they're either still uncomfortable, or actually begin to give me pointers for places I could shop or styles I could try. "Well...yeah, I think I could do that. You know? I'd just have to get used to looking at myself in the mirror every day and thinking, 'Man, I'm a pussy.' Because if I'm going to change that much about myself just so someone else will like me, that's exactly what I'll be." I've yet to hear that line from the same chick a second time. Fantastic, seriously - this is how you need to roll, guys. Straightforward and direct. Deal with issues, ask honest questions. Stop with this whiny "Oh, I don't understand them" martyrdom. Here's the thing: I don't really think women are all that different from men, and I don't think it's impossible to understand what other people are thinking, or the games people play sometimes. But you need a lot of experience to get that level of insight. And letting yourself get played while sitting back and wondering what's really happening isn't going to get anyone that level of experience.
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theryno665
Grimlock
wants a title underneath the stars
Kinda Homeless
Posts: 13,571
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Post by theryno665 on May 17, 2010 22:26:47 GMT -5
Oh, I've made girls uncomfortable after that one. It hasn't happened in a while, but I'll pause for a couple seconds and say, "Why one just like me, what's wrong with me?" They'll usually try to laugh it off, but I'll say, "No, it's a serious question, I think it's in my best interest to know. What's wrong with me?" At this point, they don't know what to say, so I say, "Okay, let's break this down. You said, 'just like me,' so obviously the problem isn't my personality, the kind of man I am. Am I too ugly for you?" That always brings about a denial, and some of them go on to tell me that I'm cute or whatever. "Okay, it's not my personality, and it's not my face. Is it my body? Hell, I'm a skinny dude, I know that ain't for everybody." Usually, this gets a denial too, but some actually admit that they like bigger guys. (In that instance, I end with, "Well then you don't want someone just like me, do you?" and go on with the day.) If they deny that's the problem, I'll say, "Okay, it's not my personality, not my face, not my body. Is it the way I dress, the way I wear my hair?" That's actually what usually catches them. I recently got a real haircut for the first time in a couple of years. For the last 2 years or so, and for a short period of time before that, I've had the duck tail haircut. Full-on "go go greased lightning," Johnny Depp in "Crybaby" greaser hair. The clothes was jeans, motorcycle boots (and jacket in proper weather) and either t-shirts, bowling shirts, or western style button up shirts. That has overwhelmingly been what seemed to turn these chicks off. So then I say, "Oh, okay, I get it - you're embarrassed to be seen in public with me. " Not in a confrontational tone, but like I'm actually understanding something for the first time. "So, basically what you're saying is, if I got a more fashionable haircut, and stopped wearing the leather jacket and boots and maybe got some nicer clothes, I'd be more appealing." At this point, they're either still uncomfortable, or actually begin to give me pointers for places I could shop or styles I could try. "Well...yeah, I think I could do that. You know? I'd just have to get used to looking at myself in the mirror every day and thinking, 'Man, I'm a pussy.' Because if I'm going to change that much about myself just so someone else will like me, that's exactly what I'll be." I've yet to hear that line from the same chick a second time. Fantastic, seriously - this is how you need to roll, guys. Straightforward and direct. Deal with issues, ask honest questions. Stop with this whiny "Oh, I don't understand them" martyrdom. Here's the thing: I don't really think women are all that different from men, and I don't think it's impossible to understand what other people are thinking, or the games people play sometimes. But you need a lot of experience to get that level of insight. And letting yourself get played while sitting back and wondering what's really happening isn't going to get anyone that level of experience. See, the thing is I would try the direct method...but then the girl would just stop talking to me.
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H-Fist
Hank Scorpio
Posts: 6,485
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Post by H-Fist on May 17, 2010 22:28:56 GMT -5
I think the worst thing a girl can say to a guy is, "you're like a brother to me." I am pretty sure that's the one that hurts the most. Unless she's from the American South.
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Post by Orange on May 17, 2010 22:30:16 GMT -5
Ouch, I haven't hardly been in any relationships but they sound like a bitch to be in
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,126
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Post by Mozenrath on May 17, 2010 22:34:13 GMT -5
Ouch, I haven't hardly been in any relationships but they sound like a bitch to be in Can be, but if it's a good one, that is not what most of the time is spent on.
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Post by mcclanahan on May 17, 2010 22:35:08 GMT -5
I can think of one thing that can't be topped..."Awwww...it's like a penis...but smaller"...anytime a woman says that no matter how big you are it makes you wish she were talking about other guys
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Post by "Playboy" Don Douglas on May 17, 2010 22:59:33 GMT -5
See, the thing is I would try the direct method...but then the girl would just stop talking to me. Then I would go so far as to say you probably wouldn't be missing out on much.
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dabossftw
Unicron
wants Yappapi in the proper position.
Posts: 2,581
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Post by dabossftw on May 17, 2010 23:58:45 GMT -5
I think the worst thing a girl can say to a guy is, "you're like a brother to me." I am pretty sure that's the one that hurts the most. Unless she's from the American South. YUK YUK YUK YUK!
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Renslayer
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
every time i come around your city...
Posts: 16,625
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Post by Renslayer on May 18, 2010 0:29:39 GMT -5
Being in the friend zone is the worst possible place to be.
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Post by "Playboy" Don Douglas on May 18, 2010 0:34:42 GMT -5
Unless she's from the American South. Ah, yet another sign of how southerners are the one group it's still okay for everybody to make fun of. I'm wondering when we're going to get a group standing up for us to fight the discrimination. But, we won't. Because we're nothing but inbred rednecks who probably can't read. Think I'm overreacting if you wish, but put up with it every day with no one even saying, "It's wrong to talk about people like that," and pretty soon you'll be pissy about it too.
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Post by i.Sarita.com on May 18, 2010 2:08:10 GMT -5
Unless she's from the American South. Ah, yet another sign of how southerners are the one group it's still okay for everybody to make fun of. I'm wondering when we're going to get a group standing up for us to fight the discrimination. But, we won't. Because we're nothing but inbred rednecks who probably can't read. Think I'm overreacting if you wish, but put up with it every day with no one even saying, "It's wrong to talk about people like that," and pretty soon you'll be pissy about it too. Problem is, it's like every other stereotype...it may not apply to everyone, BUT there is a reason why it's a stereotype in the first place...and after living in Georgia/Alabama for a few years, I too agree with the statements making fun of southerners.
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Post by elmstreetkid on May 18, 2010 10:30:06 GMT -5
Unless she's from the American South. Ah, yet another sign of how southerners are the one group it's still okay for everybody to make fun of. I'm wondering when we're going to get a group standing up for us to fight the discrimination. But, we won't. Because we're nothing but inbred rednecks who probably can't read. Think I'm overreacting if you wish, but put up with it every day with no one even saying, "It's wrong to talk about people like that," and pretty soon you'll be pissy about it too. I don't think you're being pissy. Hell, I've lived in NY state all the time and it bothers the hell out of me. And it's only gotten worse the past decade as the Red State/Blue State divide grows. Reminds me, weirdly enough, of one of the best pieces of writing on an album that I've ever seen: www.factualopinion.com/the_factual_opinion/2008/12/the-top-30-albums-of-2008-16.html
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Post by Kris Kobain on May 18, 2010 11:07:57 GMT -5
"I love you but I can't do this anymore. You need f****** help."
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smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on May 18, 2010 11:18:31 GMT -5
I've had a girl who didn't know why she didn't like me like me. It's kinda odd because she has said the following. "You sweet, your nice, your funny, your not ugly but really cute etc etc." I realize that there could be a reason why she doesn't like me that way, but it's REALLy frustrating when you don't know what the problem is. To me, "I don't know why, I just see you as a friend" doesn't always fly.
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Post by "Playboy" Don Douglas on May 18, 2010 12:13:39 GMT -5
Problem is, it's like every other stereotype...it may not apply to everyone, BUT there is a reason why it's a stereotype in the first place...and after living in Georgia/Alabama for a few years, I too agree with the statements making fun of southerners. Okay, there are rednecks. Believe me, living in Tennessee all my life, I know this. I've never seen the always-implied incest, but I guess people think that's too good of a joke to drop it. But look at it like this: if someone says, "That black dude must be on his way to get some fried chicken and watermelon. Hope he doesn't steal someone's car to do it," someone will call him out on it, and rightfully so. But if someone says, "That redneck must be on his way to f*** his sister. I hope his pig doesn't get too jealous," well, that's just funny and no one says anything about it. It doesn't bother me so much that people make jokes. There are jokes told every day about every group you can think of. What bothers me is that with every other group, people stand up and say that it's wrong. With us, we "need to relax and learn how to take a joke," or "we bring it on ourselves." It's a double standard that no one gives a damn about. I've finally gotten tired of it.
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