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Post by Citizen Snips on Jan 9, 2011 19:36:52 GMT -5
The irony was while there I met pro wrestler [WITHHELD] and he hooked me up with some s***. Tell us about the impact that Sgt. Craig "Pitbull" Pittman had on the 'CrapIt...it's still really hard to talk about that, man. So many scams, that fake rehab, the crooked nursing home. I think he was a couple of the fake "girl" posters, too. He...if he's watching...he's...you're a monster, Sgt Craig Pittman.
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,412
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Jan 9, 2011 19:58:39 GMT -5
Tell us about the weekly Jenga tournaments.
Those? Or they're still going man. I mean, it's just me and Akane, and sometimes Ash stops by for a chat, but they're still totally going on man, despite any rumors you've heard.
And the Monopoly tournaments?
Not since the great Monopoly riot of '09. That damn Hasbro....
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spec
Hank Scorpio
Bum Wiping Aficionado
Posts: 5,676
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Post by spec on Jan 9, 2011 20:00:12 GMT -5
We tracked down the elusive "dark lord of the pith" who was difficult to find due to frequent name changes and rumoured to have become an eccentric recluse prone to bouts of spontaneous interpretive dance.
*rocking on rocking chair* *cackles like a loon*
Go away!
*facial twitch*
There ain't no Wrestle Crap and there never was!
*does The Charleston*
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Lupin the Third
Patti Mayonnaise
I'm sorry.....I love you. *boot to the head*--3rd most culpable in the jixing of NXT, D'oh!
Join the Dark Order....
Posts: 36,337
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Post by Lupin the Third on Jan 9, 2011 21:20:30 GMT -5
And then, one of the bigger events unfolded over a course of 20 minutes.
"Yeah it was tough watching Zarkon die against Voltron. I kinda thought we won that battle. But of course, it didn't help that all Lotor wanted to do was get in the princess' pants. Which is kinda odd to say, as she really didn't wear pants all that often."
I see. And what did this event have effect on the divorce between Wrestle and 'The Crap?
"Well, Madison was all pissed, because he put major money down on Zarkon finally beating Voltron. They gave him really good odds, too, 5-1. Which was odd, because I don't think Voltron's ever lost a fight. I told him, I was like, 'Madison, you might wanna reconsider.' But Cornfed was all like, 'Oh this is gonna be easy. Zarkon will wipe the floor with him.' I tried consulting Woody on this as well, but apparently, he was too busy disposing of dead hookers. I don't think I've ever seen Madison trash a room that badly after something."
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Ben Wyatt
Crow T. Robot
Are You Gonna Go My Way?
I don't get it. At all. It's kind of a small horse, I mean what am I missing? Am I crazy?
Posts: 41,552
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Post by Ben Wyatt on Jan 9, 2011 21:59:59 GMT -5
I think it's time to talk openly about our weekly 'Daria' themed parties. They usually ended in police chases and tears. Why, I remember this one time Gorja and Woody both came dressed as Trent Lane. There were fists and chairs flying......but dont believe the rumors I knocked up a girl who was dressed as Quinn Morgandorffer that girl is lying.........
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Lupin the Third
Patti Mayonnaise
I'm sorry.....I love you. *boot to the head*--3rd most culpable in the jixing of NXT, D'oh!
Join the Dark Order....
Posts: 36,337
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Post by Lupin the Third on Jan 9, 2011 22:03:39 GMT -5
"I recall the time of the Great Troll War back in 2008. Many a Crapper died that day. And what's worse is I can't seem to recall that War. Ever. It's like I got hit with one of those Neuralyzer like the Men in Black carry around."
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Post by Bang Bang Bart on Jan 9, 2011 22:27:01 GMT -5
Mr. Pilgrim, tell us about your days as "Radiation Dude", then as "Jaime Reyes"...
The what now?
Your tenure as the aforementioned two, Mr. Pilgrim. Enlighten the viewing audience.
The what? I'm Scott Pilgrim, damn it! I refuse to be a part of this slander theatre any longer.
What slander, you video game-obsessed slacker bass playing loser!
Exactly, fella.
*walks out*
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Lupin the Third
Patti Mayonnaise
I'm sorry.....I love you. *boot to the head*--3rd most culpable in the jixing of NXT, D'oh!
Join the Dark Order....
Posts: 36,337
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Post by Lupin the Third on Jan 10, 2011 20:01:01 GMT -5
We asked the 'Crap's local championship driver, Speed Racer, on his prior identities of Deadpool Racer and Yukon Cornelius.
"Well, Deadpool Racer was a weird little experiment. Since everyone was talking about how there were numerous Deadpools, I was like, 'S*** let's do it like so on the Forums!' And I also noticed that there were no racer versions of Deadpool. So I enrolled in Weapon X, thinking, 'Okay, doesn't seem so bad.' But the stuff they used on me wore off pretty quickly."
"As for Yukon, I thought that it would be kinda neat to honor the best character in that special."
What about Hermes?
"What, that elf that wanted to be a dentist? He was f***in' lame! He probably doesn't even own a TV, that nerd!"
"Sorry, got a little Michael Cole there for a moment."
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Post by Bang Bang Bart on Jan 10, 2011 20:19:25 GMT -5
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Demented
Grimlock
Puddin'
Quinn in a box.
Posts: 14,366
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Post by Demented on Jan 11, 2011 1:55:03 GMT -5
Tell us about the divorce.
That damn witch took every damn penny I had! I had to fight tooth and nail just to keep my asylum.
We're talking about the forum, Demented.
Oh. Uh... cigar?
No thanks.
Me neither. *Tosses cigar book*
Moving on.
Right... So Wrestle and Crap got divorced. The end.
That's it?
What more do you want from me.
You are horrible at interviews.
I know that, Harley.
Can we stop this and go do something else?
Jewelry or toy store?
Toy store!
Figures...
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,412
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Jan 11, 2011 2:14:03 GMT -5
Tell us about the Harley Army
I don't know if I'm the right guy to talk about that. Demented would be the best guy.
We would interview him, but he's.... you know...
Demented?
Well, yeah.
As long as you learn to deal with the crazy, he's a good dude. Hell, he and I usually shoot the shit every now and then, while Harley and my latest crush do things.
And your latest crush would be?
*Knives Chau appears, complete with cat ears and a tail.*
Neko-Knives?
Neko-Knives. So, what was your original question?
..... I forget.
Exactly.
*Neko-Knives rubs against Crash's leg as Crash smiles at the interviewer.*
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Lupin the Third
Patti Mayonnaise
I'm sorry.....I love you. *boot to the head*--3rd most culpable in the jixing of NXT, D'oh!
Join the Dark Order....
Posts: 36,337
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Post by Lupin the Third on Jan 11, 2011 23:25:38 GMT -5
"I remember being a roadie on the Beets Killer Tofu Tour back in 95. We stopped at all the major stops. Ogdenville, North Haberbrook, you name it. But when we came to the one town called Bluffington, it was a little ugly. "Chap", the drummer, sprained his wrist the night before doing only God Knows What."
Continue on.
But instead of canceling the show, they tried to get a backup drummer for the band that night. It happened to be the same night as "Free Beet Night," where everyone got a beet when they came in. It was ugly. I never saw so many beets being thrown on stage. And this was 8 minutes into the show. I think Monroe had a concussion after being pelted by numerous beets."
Did the Beets ever play in Bluffington again?
"Oh yeah, they came back the next year. Unfortunately, soon afterwards, the band broke up. Monroe started hanging out with this gal named Oko Yono. It wasn't pretty after that."
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Ken Ivory
Hank Scorpio
This sorta thing IS my bag, baby.
Posts: 5,282
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Post by Ken Ivory on Jan 12, 2011 4:21:35 GMT -5
Ken Ivory: By the time I got to the Off Topic Board, I was completely wasted, all the time. They had to cut the crap out of my hair between posts. But, would I do it all again.....?
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Post by aka Cthulhu on Jan 12, 2011 11:07:23 GMT -5
Tell us about Cthulhu, and the Madness Wars.
*bite*
OH DEAR GOD N--
*burps happily*
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Classy Lady
Don Corleone
Kingston's Part Time Lover
Posts: 1,595
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Post by Classy Lady on Jan 12, 2011 11:22:50 GMT -5
Tell us when you knew you had a problem.
"I think I realized I had a problem when I woke up in a ditch, covered in chocolate sauce, wrapped in a Swiss Flag, wearing an Ultramantis Mask. I couldn't remember how I got there, but oh boy, did my butt hurt.
.. wait, can you edit that last part out?"
No.
"DAMMIT!"
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Post by whitecrxsses on Jan 12, 2011 12:54:08 GMT -5
*Meanwhile, one of the less well-known WrestleCrap members spoke out about his debatable status within the group*
JS2: "Man, nobody even knew who I was. It was all, 'Who's JS2? He the one with the lisp?' And I was like 'No...', so they went, 'Well, who is he then?'..."
Cameraman: "Well, who *was* JS2?"
JS2: "**** this."
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Post by Kash Flagg on Jan 12, 2011 15:55:04 GMT -5
Who left the TV on?!
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,412
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Jan 12, 2011 16:17:41 GMT -5
What about "The Incident" can you tell us?
*Eyes go big.*
WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT THE INCIDENT?!
It's a known fact to the wor-
THAT'S A LIE MAN, A LIE! THERE WAS NO INCIDENT! THERE NEVER WAS AN INCIDENT!
Oh man..... The Incident. So much blood....
The Great Pizza War of 2010 caused bloodshed?
Well it started when Cornfed was all like "Man, Pizza Hut's Stuffed Crust is the best!" Next thing you know, Deadpool's claiming that the new garlic crust at Domino's is waaaay better, Cornfed calls him a liar liar pants on fire, and Cthulhu is busy eating Little Caeser's across the nation.
And don't even get me started on when Speed Racer joined in by merely suggesting that we try Papa John's....
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Yami Daimao
Patti Mayonnaise
Really, really wants to zigazig ah!
Posts: 31,784
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Post by Yami Daimao on Jan 12, 2011 16:24:27 GMT -5
...so do I get to tentarape someone, or not?
...no...
*proceeds to eat his face*
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Post by Sir Woodrow on Jan 12, 2011 16:27:13 GMT -5
I think the darkest day was when Mickie James sued the board for sexual harassment.
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