smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on Jan 8, 2012 21:58:23 GMT -5
We cut to Smokin Vokoun in the training ring with an unnamed trainer. Vokoun executes a perfect arm drag takedown. Vokoun notices the camera and starts to laugh. Hey Aaron Enigma....did you see that? DID. YOU. SEE. THAT!!! It's my skills getting better and better. Now, I haven't heard from you in a while. I know your afraid of me, I know that your shaking in your boots with the thought that you getting back into the ring with. AND WE WILL GET IN THE RING ONE MORE TIME!!!! Because, I want that belt, that you have around your waist, so damn badly. AND I WANT TO DESTROY YOU ONE MORE TIME!!!!!
But first things first, because before I get my hands that belt....I have to become the King of the WWCF. And win the King of Wrestlecrap Tournament...the best tournament of all time. Because once I win that....I can have any belt I want. Because right after I take YOUR BELT...I'M COMING AFTER JONATHAN MICHAELS!!!! I WILL BE THE ULTIMATE CHAMPION IN THE WWCF!!!!!!! I dare to dream big...no matter how crazy people think I am.
So my next victim in this tournament, will be Conner Mackenzie....The Canadian Dragon...or is it the "Digital Dragon" I don't know and I don't care. Because all you are to me is just another piece meat for me to feed on. Oh yeah, your a great Technical wrestler. You're a Canadian hero..you're a credit to your society...blah blah blah..I don't give a s***. Because all you are too me, is just another rung on my ladder of success. But don't think that I'm gonna take you lightly...because I'm not. BUT I'M BETTER THAN YOU!!!! You have only two choices in this match in two weeks....I could either TEAR YOUR ARMS OUT OF IT'S SOCKET!!!! OR I CAN MAKE YOU BLEED TO DEATH!!!!! You have two weeks to decide the fate of your loser career. SEE YA IN TWO WEEKS!!!!!!!![/color]
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Post by Connor Mackenzie on Jan 9, 2012 8:16:32 GMT -5
We cut to Smokin Vokoun in the training ring with an unnamed trainer. Vokoun executes a perfect arm drag takedown. Vokoun notices the camera and starts to laugh. Hey Aaron Enigma....did you see that? DID. YOU. SEE. THAT!!! It's my skills getting better and better. Now, I haven't heard from you in a while. I know your afraid of me, I know that your shaking in your boots with the thought that you getting back into the ring with. AND WE WILL GET IN THE RING ONE MORE TIME!!!! Because, I want that belt, that you have around your waist, so damn badly. AND I WANT TO DESTROY YOU ONE MORE TIME!!!!!
But first things first, because before I get my hands that belt....I have to become the King of the WWCF. And win the King of Wrestlecrap Tournament...the best tournament of all time. Because once I win that....I can have any belt I want. Because right after I take YOUR BELT...I'M COMING AFTER JONATHAN MICHAELS!!!! I WILL BE THE ULTIMATE CHAMPION IN THE WWCF!!!!!!! I dare to dream big...no matter how crazy people think I am.
So my next victim in this tournament, will be Conner Mackenzie....The Canadian Dragon...or is it the "Digital Dragon" I don't know and I don't care. Because all you are to me is just another piece meat for me to feed on. Oh yeah, your a great Technical wrestler. You're a Canadian hero..you're a credit to your society...blah blah blah..I don't give a s***. Because all you are too me, is just another rung on my ladder of success. But don't think that I'm gonna take you lightly...because I'm not. BUT I'M BETTER THAN YOU!!!! You have only two choices in this match in two weeks....I could either TEAR YOUR ARMS OUT OF IT'S SOCKET!!!! OR I CAN MAKE YOU BLEED TO DEATH!!!!! You have two weeks to decide the fate of your loser career. SEE YA IN TWO WEEKS!!!!!!!![/color][/quote] A camera comes into view showing Connor Mackenzie removing the bandages from his ribs after his match with Doctor Demento. As he removes the tape and gauze he tosses it into the garbage then addresses the camera, his face paint smudged and removed in spots. Good fight Demento. You certainly put me through my paces tonight but like I said, the BSOD ended things. Still, you certainly knew what to do to try and get me down. Again, good show Doc. [/color] Connor removes another strip of tape and gauze before tossing it into the garbage. He sits on a bench behind him and shakes his head lightly. Smokin' Vokoun...you claim you are going to beat me to death. Going to tear my arms off and beat me with them. Let's get one thing straight here Vok. I'm not your ken doll that you've had since you were a kid. I'm not some inanimate object you can just tear the limbs off of because you caught him trying to run off with barbie here. I don't know what other types of sick s&*^ you're into but leave it out of the ring. You know it's bad when you've got the red-headed grandchild of Lou Thesz trying to calm you down.
I can't help but find your threats rather...entertaining though. You're going to try to kill me. One of the big, big thugs of Viva Inc. trying to throw his weight around. What a shocker. What am I going to do? Here's the thing Vok. You can take all your threats and put them up Thesz's rotting ass for all I care. I am the Digital Dragon. The Highlight Maker, The Innovator but most importantly. The "DD" doesn't just stand for Digital Dragon. It stands for Death Defying. So when you say to look into your eye, to stare death in the face expect to get some spit because you sir are not death. You aren't even it's second cousin.
You are more like the guy that walks into a bar looking to get piss loaded and pick on some poor guy just trying to enjoy a beer and some music. You think that there's nothing to him so you poke, and you poke and you poke. And you poke some more. Hell, you probably carry one of your ken dolls arms in your pocket just so you can have it scratch your balls when you feel lonely and try to poke the guy with that, but then you see that the guy isn't so little, the guy isn't so meek and the guy isn't going to put up with you or your posse's crap and the next thing you know you are are getting dragged out by the bouncers after having your lights put out by the guy you were poking.
So enjoy your two week bender Vokoun, because you're going to have one hell of a hangover when I'm done with you.[/color]
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Post by "Handsome" Whitey Fats on Jan 9, 2012 10:28:55 GMT -5
This tournament is a farce. How can a man I beat be in it, and a former world champion suck as myself not be? Idiocy. Freudian slip, Fats?*smirks* OOC: Typing while sleepy
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,480
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Jan 9, 2012 14:02:48 GMT -5
Freudian slip, Fats?*smirks* OOC: Typing while sleepy OOC: I've done that before too.
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Post by Connor Mackenzie on Jan 9, 2012 14:10:17 GMT -5
OOC: I've done that before too. OOC: Same here. Though thankfully never the full on headbutt to the keyboard yet.
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,480
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Jan 9, 2012 14:13:39 GMT -5
OOC: I've done that before too. OOC: Same here. Though thankfully never the full on headbutt to the keyboard yet. OOC: Yeah, I just fall asleep an end up with a screen full of Hs and/or Us.
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The Punisher
Unicron
"They don't fear the law. They fear me..."
Posts: 3,082
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Post by The Punisher on Jan 9, 2012 16:01:49 GMT -5
*A WWCF.com exclusive*
Fred G. Neric: Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce to you at this time, the current Number One Contender for the WWCF Championship, Frank Castle.
*Frank Castle appears on camera, looming over the interviewer*
Fred: Frank, you decided to cash in your Money in the Bank briefcase at King of WrestleCrap, can you tell us why that is?
Frank: Why don't you take a wild guess Fred?
Fred: Well, I thought you were trying to do the honourable thing Frank..
Frank: The honourable thing gets you dead Fred. The honourable thing would be to give this title shot to someone more deserving. The honourable thing to do, would be to accept that Jonathan Michaels is a better man, that he is more deserving than me, that he has achieved what I suppose most people would call normality - celebrity even.
Fred: So what are you doing?
Frank: I'm taking him on because this way, there will be no excuses, there will be no one saying "you didn't deserve it", no one feeling sorry for him because he was cheated. I'm going to beat him with no weapons, no outside help, no excuses. I'm going to wipe that smug grin off his face with these two bare hands, and I'm going to enjoy doing it.
Fred: So this is about you having to prove yourself?
Frank: You haven't been listening have you? This isn't about me proving myself. I have to do this for one reason, and one reason only, because seeing people cheering, celebrating, being happy - that eats away at my soul.
Fred: What? You hate people being happy?
Frank: Exactly. I hate it. I hate the very notion of happiness. People scream and shout and cheer for their favourites, and they boo and scream at guys like me. It's all some stupid fairytale. No one is innocent. No once is whiter than white. We all have dark sides, and we all exploit someone else to get what we want. Some people have happiness. They have families, prospects, a career. They have lovers, children, wonderful holidays, epic weddings, joyous hours and days spent together.
Fred: Are you serious?
Frank: I'm deadly serious. You know what those people have too? They have support. They have people to help them pull through. I've never had that. I never will have that. No one supports me. No one will ever go out of their way to help me. I came to that conclusion a long time ago. So I have nothing left. I have nothing other than to show people that that ridiculous facade of happiness is nothing more than that - a facade. So I have to destroy the illusion.
Fred: What has this got to do with Jonathan Michaels then?
Frank: Haven't you listened to anything I've said? Jonathan Michaels is the embodiment of these people's hope. As long as he has that belt, these people will believe that there are fairytales, that there are happy endings, that the good guys always win. It doesn't happen this way. I'm going to prove that the good guys don't win.
Fred: Frank, what are you going to do about the King of WrestleCrap winner - they're entitled to a title shot just as much as you are.
Frank: And are they going to do what I am? Are they going to show people that this pretense of good vs evil has any other conclusion that reality biting - and the man who will do what is necessary winning? Of course they won't. Whoever wins that torunament will have to answer to me. Michaels is mine, and this supposed Kign can wait - then he can get destroyed as well.
Fred: Frank, this has been both disturbing and revealing, thanks for your time.
Frank: Thanks for not asking any stupid questions Fred. If you had, I'd have taken your head off.
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smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on Jan 9, 2012 16:51:12 GMT -5
We cut to Smokin Vokoun in the training ring with an unnamed trainer. Vokoun executes a perfect arm drag takedown. Vokoun notices the camera and starts to laugh. Hey Aaron Enigma....did you see that? DID. YOU. SEE. THAT!!! It's my skills getting better and better. Now, I haven't heard from you in a while. I know your afraid of me, I know that your shaking in your boots with the thought that you getting back into the ring with. AND WE WILL GET IN THE RING ONE MORE TIME!!!! Because, I want that belt, that you have around your waist, so damn badly. AND I WANT TO DESTROY YOU ONE MORE TIME!!!!!
But first things first, because before I get my hands that belt....I have to become the King of the WWCF. And win the King of Wrestlecrap Tournament...the best tournament of all time. Because once I win that....I can have any belt I want. Because right after I take YOUR BELT...I'M COMING AFTER JONATHAN MICHAELS!!!! I WILL BE THE ULTIMATE CHAMPION IN THE WWCF!!!!!!! I dare to dream big...no matter how crazy people think I am.
So my next victim in this tournament, will be Conner Mackenzie....The Canadian Dragon...or is it the "Digital Dragon" I don't know and I don't care. Because all you are to me is just another piece meat for me to feed on. Oh yeah, your a great Technical wrestler. You're a Canadian hero..you're a credit to your society...blah blah blah..I don't give a s***. Because all you are too me, is just another rung on my ladder of success. But don't think that I'm gonna take you lightly...because I'm not. BUT I'M BETTER THAN YOU!!!! You have only two choices in this match in two weeks....I could either TEAR YOUR ARMS OUT OF IT'S SOCKET!!!! OR I CAN MAKE YOU BLEED TO DEATH!!!!! You have two weeks to decide the fate of your loser career. SEE YA IN TWO WEEKS!!!!!!!![/color][/quote] A camera comes into view showing Connor Mackenzie removing the bandages from his ribs after his match with Doctor Demento. As he removes the tape and gauze he tosses it into the garbage then addresses the camera, his face paint smudged and removed in spots. Good fight Demento. You certainly put me through my paces tonight but like I said, the BSOD ended things. Still, you certainly knew what to do to try and get me down. Again, good show Doc. [/color] Connor removes another strip of tape and gauze before tossing it into the garbage. He sits on a bench behind him and shakes his head lightly. Smokin' Vokoun...you claim you are going to beat me to death. Going to tear my arms off and beat me with them. Let's get one thing straight here Vok. I'm not your ken doll that you've had since you were a kid. I'm not some inanimate object you can just tear the limbs off of because you caught him trying to run off with barbie here. I don't know what other types of sick s&*^ you're into but leave it out of the ring. You know it's bad when you've got the red-headed grandchild of Lou Thesz trying to calm you down.
I can't help but find your threats rather...entertaining though. You're going to try to kill me. One of the big, big thugs of Viva Inc. trying to throw his weight around. What a shocker. What am I going to do? Here's the thing Vok. You can take all your threats and put them up Thesz's rotting ass for all I care. I am the Digital Dragon. The Highlight Maker, The Innovator but most importantly. The "DD" doesn't just stand for Digital Dragon. It stands for Death Defying. So when you say to look into your eye, to stare death in the face expect to get some spit because you sir are not death. You aren't even it's second cousin.
You are more like the guy that walks into a bar looking to get piss loaded and pick on some poor guy just trying to enjoy a beer and some music. You think that there's nothing to him so you poke, and you poke and you poke. And you poke some more. Hell, you probably carry one of your ken dolls arms in your pocket just so you can have it scratch your balls when you feel lonely and try to poke the guy with that, but then you see that the guy isn't so little, the guy isn't so meek and the guy isn't going to put up with you or your posse's crap and the next thing you know you are are getting dragged out by the bouncers after having your lights put out by the guy you were poking.
So enjoy your two week bender Vokoun, because you're going to have one hell of a hangover when I'm done with you.[/color] [/quote] Ummm..... I never said that I was gonna beat you with your own arms, dude. But you know what? I LOVE IT!!!!! YOUR A GENIUS CONNER!!!!!! Your a loser, a coward and whimp...BUT YOUR A GENIUS!!!!!!
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Post by Connor Mackenzie on Jan 9, 2012 20:16:00 GMT -5
Ummm..... I never said that I was gonna beat you with your own arms, dude. But you know what? I LOVE IT!!!!! YOUR A GENIUS CONNER!!!!!! Your a loser, a coward and whimp...BUT YOUR A GENIUS!!!!!! Yes, because ripping my arms out of their sockets would make it such a stretch for me to make from that point.
Choking on my own blood, breaking my bones in a thousand places. Please tell me you remember saying that because if not I think we're going to have to get the doctors to ensure you aren't suffering from a concussion. Come to think of it, just how many times have you been dropped on your head? I mean, I'm sure there must have been at least what? A dozen times you were when you were born? It would explain so much. Your lack of voice control, your penchant for inflicting torture upon youself, that smell...I could go on but I don't really want to run down the list for the next week or so. [/color] Connor snaps his fingers as if he's come to a realization. Holy crap I just realized why I thought I felt deja vu watching National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation last month. You must have been the inspiration for Cousin Eddie![/color]
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smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on Jan 9, 2012 20:43:31 GMT -5
Ummm..... I never said that I was gonna beat you with your own arms, dude. But you know what? I LOVE IT!!!!! YOUR A GENIUS CONNER!!!!!! Your a loser, a coward and whimp...BUT YOUR A GENIUS!!!!!! Yes, because ripping my arms out of their sockets would make it such a stretch for me to make from that point.
Choking on my own blood, breaking my bones in a thousand places. Please tell me you remember saying that because if not I think we're going to have to get the doctors to ensure you aren't suffering from a concussion. Come to think of it, just how many times have you been dropped on your head? I mean, I'm sure there must have been at least what? A dozen times you were when you were born? It would explain so much. Your lack of voice control, your penchant for inflicting torture upon youself, that smell...I could go on but I don't really want to run down the list for the next week or so. [/color] Connor snaps his fingers as if he's come to a realization. Holy crap I just realized why I thought I felt deja vu watching National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation last month. You must have been the inspiration for Cousin Eddie![/color][/quote] Hahahaha...YOU'RE SOOOO F***ING FUNNY YOU MISERABLE PRICK!!!!!
Lou Thesz III walks in and whispers something into Vokoun's ear. Vokoun just takes a deep breath and gives a sly smile. Well....I'm so glad you have all the confidence in the world, Conner. I'm glad your going into this thing with no fear. Because I don't have any fear either. I'm on the roll of a lifetime. As I've stated before Conner....2012 is gonna be the greatest year of my life. You are looking at the Future..King of Wrestlecrap. You are looking at the future....WWCF Interforum Champion (Aaron...where you buddy?) And this year.....in the future...I will be the World Heavyweight Champion. Hell, when I win this tournament...I get a shot at the World Championship. Something that I have long deserved, but was always passed over for. My big buddy Frank Castle...will destory Jonathan Michaels....just like I'm going to destroy the finalist...just like I'm gonna destroy Aaron Enigma....just like...I'm going to destroy you. You can joke all you want Conner. But look into my eyes.....and you see....that I'm not joking.
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Fiddleford H. McGucket
El Dandy
My Mind's been gone for 30-odd years! Can't Break what's already broken!
Posts: 8,748
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Post by Fiddleford H. McGucket on Jan 10, 2012 17:13:18 GMT -5
So I'm not gonna be the Lord of the Ring... S'no big thing I'm already (Technically) The Champion of All Television! Combined with the fact that I Single handedly (With some help from Mistah Drakin and company) Took out Colt, securing my Role as Prince of Print, and my pre-existing Radiosity (It's not a Word? HA! Now it its.....Add it to your lexicon, use it amngst your friends!). I Doctor DEEEEEE-MENTO Proclaim mysel King of All Media! *Camera pans over to Ted N. Terviewer*
Ted: But what about Jazzma-- I mean "El Hombre Del Jazz"?
Dr D: Teddy....first of all it's not (In a Droopy Dog-like voice) "El Hombre Del Jazz" (drops the voice) It's (Cups hs hands near his mouth into a megaphone) "ELLLLLLL HOOOMMMMMMBRRRREEEEEEEEEE DEEEEELLLLLLLLLLL JAAAAAAZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!" (Drops hands) You gotta put some "oomph" to it! And what do I think? Really? I think that's just PEACHY! I mean sharing a title with a legend in this industry is phenominal! It'll be a shame when we have the inevitable "Who's the real champion" feud, but down the line when I'm the Honorable Hardcore Champion of All Television and King of all Media Or HHCoTV&KoM for short we'll look back on this little SNAFU and have a few laughs.
I'm sure Mr. The Sam is already commisioning a second belt because of this momentous occasion.
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Post by General Adam on Jan 10, 2012 17:33:31 GMT -5
Hello folks Fred G. Neric here with an interview with Dr. Quack and.....Teddy Roosevelt.
BULLY!
Now Dr. Quack can you tell me how the General started to believe that he is Teddy Roosevelt?
Quack: Well after his match the General sub-stain a massive head injury causing some brain damage. Not enough to make him a vegetable, but just enough.
But why Teddy Roosevelt? Why not JFK or Nixon?
Quack: To tell the truth I am not to sure why he picked Teddy Roosevelt.
SPEAK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG STICK!
Quack: Quiet now Teddy we are trying to talk here.
*Teddy Roosevelt then punches Dr. Quack with the Roosevelt right hand.*
Lesson number one my boy: Never tell a Roosevelt what to do. Now if you excuse me I must be off.
*Teddy gets on a horse and rides off.*
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Brainbustaaah!
Hank Scorpio
Best Damn Finishing Move Period
Posts: 5,600
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Post by Brainbustaaah! on Jan 10, 2012 17:49:33 GMT -5
I lost...I lost. Three tainted title matches, and the one where I actually get a fair match...I lose. Well, if that doesn't say a lot about me, I don't know what does. This is the sort of thing that'd get you questioning your career...your life decisions. If this is the best I can do. why am I in it?
Because it's not. Because I've just started. I'm not giving up because of one loss. Didn't give up at Night of the Wrestling Zombies, did I? Demento..."El Hombre de Jazz"...whichever one of you ends up with the title...rest assured I'm coming after it again. Can't rest on your laurels. You might not have people interfering left and right, but I don't NEED interference to win. If you question that? I'm all too happy to prove it.
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Post by Mr. Socko's Brother on Jan 10, 2012 17:54:17 GMT -5
*The Wind-up Monkey is still sitting on the top shelf of the locker as Ryan Blood returns and opens the door*
BLOOD: Ugh, I need a shower.
WIND-UP MONKEY: Of course you do! You just wrestled! There's blood on you!
BLOOD: Well yes Wind-up Monkey, there is that, but what I really mean is that I feel unclean after talking to those guys in creative. What a disgusting and loathsome cross-section of what only barely qualifies as humanity they are!
WIND-UP MONKEY: Preaching to the choir, dude. Well, are they gonna let me live?
BLOOD: Yeah, they're willing to give it a chance.
WIND-UP MONKEY: Whew! Well, you've saved my life. What are you gonna do next?
BLOOD: Oh man, where to begin? Well, me and Richlen fought to a double countout, so BOTH of us are advancing in the King Of WrestleCrap tournament and will have a rematch. But it's gonna be a triple threat with another guy who advanced: "Teddy Roosevelt".
WIND-UP MONKEY: Um. I don't know how to feel about that.
BLOOD: You need to let him go, Wind-up Monkey. He's more Roosevelt than General now. His mind is twisted and evil.
WIND-UP MONKEY: "Evil"? Isn't that a little harsh?
BLOOD: Okay okay, maybe not evil, but you're not gonna argue with the "twisted" part, are you?
WIND-UP MONKEY: Well, obviously not.
BLOOD: So there's that, but at Lord of the Ring I'm gonna be defending my Hardcore Championship against Richlen...
WIND-UP MONKEY: OH FOR F***'S SAKE!
BLOOD: ...AND Dr. Demento, AND Vincent Van Agony, who's also putting his Championship of Honor on the line. Winner gets both belts.
WIND-UP MONKEY: Whoa, double champion! Is mind control legal in a Fatal Fourway? I could mind control them. It's kind of my thing.
BLOOD: I'll have to check. If it's a hardcore match then sure, but even if it isn't then I think there's some precedent that would work for us here, the case of Osirian Portal v. Runaways if I recall correctly. But I don't want you to do anything to Richlen. Him and me are both Equalizers, and if I beat him I want to do it fairly.
WIND-UP MONKEY: Hmph, next you're gonna tell me that you want to tag with the guy.
BLOOD: The thought actually did cross my mind, and I have thought up an awesome name for the team too! See, I'm from Baltimore, a.k.a. "Charm City". He's from Wisconsin, "The Badger State", which he named a move after.
WIND-UP MONKEY: Okay...
BLOOD: Therefore I submit to you the tag team moniker of....
*He pauses dramatically*
BLOOD: "THE CHARMING BADGERS!"
*(beat)*
BLOOD: Well, what do you think?
WIND-UP MONKEY: That's...certainly a name...all right...
BLOOD: Why thank you. Hand me my phone, willya? I can't waste precious time walking the hallways; I need to dial up Gus and Shaelin and suggest this to them right now!
*The Wind-up Monkey telekinetically levitates Blood's cell over to him, while facepalming with one cymbal*
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Post by "Handsome" Whitey Fats on Jan 10, 2012 19:10:30 GMT -5
So I have to fight a fake detective. Sweet Christ.
I have no beef with you, Aaron, but I have to win this tourny. I'm the smartest man in this federation, and I will find a way to win.
I'll pin you with a Southern Discomfort, make you so mad you get dqed, or I'll just cheat. It makes no difference to me. I have to prove I'm the best, then face JoNo or whoever is champion, and get my title back. I never lost it, I went through six or seven main event caliber talent to get it.
Most of all, because it is mine, until someone pins me for it. I am the true world champion, and all of you know it.
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Post by hossfan on Jan 10, 2012 20:08:40 GMT -5
A WWCF.com Exclusive
Backstage in the Parts Unknown Arena Infirmary following Monday Nite Raw:
Doctor: Hold still, Jack.
Jack "The Snack" Roberts (sitting on an examining table getting taped up): Yeah, yeah...
There's a crash, and Caleb Fourchon bursts into the room
Caleb: RAHHRR!!
Fourchon hammers Roberts with several forearm strikes, then grabs the skull off of the nearby model skeleton and brains him with it.
Doctor: Help! Security!
Dropping the skull, Caleb rips the door of a nearby medicine cabinet and begins rummaging through it. He produces a bottle of pills and shows it to the doctor.
Caleb: Whut dese?
Doctor: The-They're painkillers!
Caleb pops the top and pours the vial's contents on Roberts's face, smearing the tablets over his mouth, cheeks, and chin, while repeatedly saying "Take yer medicine, Snack!". He bounces the empty container off his victim's forehead and stalks out.
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Jazzman
King Koopa
Trombone Shorty > Your Favorite Musician
Posts: 11,231
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Post by Jazzman on Jan 10, 2012 22:59:45 GMT -5
So I'm not gonna be the Lord of the Ring... S'no big thing I'm already (Technically) The Champion of All Television! Combined with the fact that I Single handedly (With some help from Mistah Drakin and company) Took out Colt, securing my Role as Prince of Print, and my pre-existing Radiosity (It's not a Word? HA! Now it its.....Add it to your lexicon, use it amngst your friends!). I Doctor DEEEEEE-MENTO Proclaim mysel King of All Media!*Camera pans over to Ted N. Terviewer* Ted: But what about Jazzma-- I mean "El Hombre Del Jazz"?Dr D: Teddy....first of all it's not (In a Droopy Dog-like voice) "El Hombre Del Jazz" (drops the voice) It's (Cups hs hands near his mouth into a megaphone) "ELLLLLLL HOOOMMMMMMBRRRREEEEEEEEEE DEEEEELLLLLLLLLLL JAAAAAAZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!" (Drops hands) You gotta put some "oomph" to it! And what do I think? Really? I think that's just PEACHY! I mean sharing a title with a legend in this industry is phenominal! It'll be a shame when we have the inevitable "Who's the real champion" feud, but down the line when I'm the Honorable Hardcore Champion of All Television and King of all Media Or HHCoTV&KoM for short we'll look back on this little SNAFU and have a few laughs.
I'm sure Mr. The Sam is already commisioning a second belt because of this momentous occasion. Howdy everyone, Jerry Fish here backstage with the... newest, i guess WWCF superstar El Hombre Del Jazz¡Hola!Yeah... so, wait who the hell are you?*A man in a nice suit walks into frame* I am Alberto Ramirez, El Hombre De Jazz's translator and good friendOk then, well then let me ask you a question, why don't you come clean and let the fans know you are Ryan Bergman?*Alberto whispers in the ear of Hombre who begins tospeak in Spanish* Nunca he sido y nunca será el señor Bergman. Voy a ser el campeón de la televisión y ni siquiera que el doctor loco me puede detener. Este es mi destino, esto es lo que yo había nacido para hacer, para llevar el nombre de jazz de vuelta a lo que debería estar en la compañía.
Yo era un luchador joven, cuando el señor Bergman entrenado conmigo durante el tiempo que el año pasado. Me dijo entonces: "Si alguna vez tengo la oportunidad de ofrecerle una oportunidad, es mejor que estar esperando por el teléfono."
Ahora he llegado a la tierra de Roosevelt Teddy, castigos, los detectives, los dragones, los hombres blancos de grasa con el dinero, y los luchadores de cocodrilos
Si este es el sueño americano quisiera nunca despertar, me gustaría dar las gracias al señor Bergman por haberme dado esta oportunidad, es algo que no va a desperdiciar.Alright buddy, earn your paycheck...Yes, El Hombre would first like everyone to know that he isn't Ryan Bergman. He and Mr. Bergman trained together while Mr. Bergman took his sabbatical from the WWCF.
He is happy he is now in a company with wrestlers like the great Teddy Roosevelt, back from the past to wrestle alligators and Sherlock Holmes*El Hombre rolls his eyes and asked for the mic back.* Trae tu mejor doctor, usted lo necesita!*Jazz points menacingly at camera before walking away* Doctor Demento, We're coming for you SUCKA!*Jerry Fish's mouth is wide open and he drops the mic and you here mumbling as he walks away, "I'm getting too old for this shit"
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Jeremy Dupoe
Don Corleone
Your lack of intelligence disgusts me
Posts: 1,414
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Post by Jeremy Dupoe on Jan 11, 2012 1:22:19 GMT -5
*Apon kicks open the locker room door*
Agon: ANYONE WHO ISN'T DISTUBANCE VACATE THE LOCKER ROOM THIS IS OFFICAL GHOSTBUSTER BUISNESS
*A couple jobbers leave the locker room*
Agon:ALRIGHT WE KNOW YOUR HERE SHOW YOURSELF
illness violence accedent All caused by neglogent orderlies and because of these...unfortunate incidents we were trapped in that damned sanitarium, after Mr. Dupoe so kindly donated his body we took over got out of there. And now you want to put us in a simalar situation
*a ghostbuster behind Agon with a nametag Gankman speaks up*
Gankman:ALRIGHT GHOSTY WE CAN DO THIS THE EASY WAY OR THE HARD WAY
fair enough I choose the hard way
*Disturbance jumps from the ceiling landing on Agon and rushes out of the room, a few seconds later the arenas exit doors are heard closing*
Gankman: son of a BITCH!!!
Agon: hmmmmm..... we got two choices here sue for damages or plan B
Gankman: what was plan B again?
Agon: just follow my lead
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,480
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Jan 11, 2012 9:40:54 GMT -5
*Gus Richlen and Shaelin Marie O'Hara are in the back, with Richlen getting stitched up on both sides of his head and ranting.*
OF COURSE I'M IN A BAD MOOD!!!! THAT LITTLE IDIOT THOUGHT HE WAS GOING TO SCREW ME OUT OF MY SHOT!!!!
MEDIC: Mr. Richlen, you need to hold still and calm down.
I'M NOT CALMING THE F*** DOWN!!!! THAT COWARD TRIED TO ROB ME OUT THERE!!!!
Ricky, please-
*Richlen's phone goes off, with the ringtone being "My Generation" by Limp Bizkit. Shaelin answers:*
Hello?
*PAUSE*
Uhm, he's here, but he's getting stitched up and he's screaming about Viva a lot.
Who is it?
*moving the phone away from her mouth* It's Ryan Blood.
*Richlen motions for the phone and she hands it to him.*
Yeah?
*PAUSE*
Yeah, I know. But trust me, Viva's gonna hear it next week, if not earlier.
*PAUSE*
Well, that particular bridge is best left uncrossed for now.
*PAUSE*
Well, no, I hadn't thought about it.
*PAUSE*
Yeah, I suppose, I mean, we'll probably be tagging up quite a bit now. Ironic, ain't it, I mean where we used to be at each other's throats?
*PAUSE*
Alright, shoot.
*PAUSE*
Well, no, that isn't all that impressive.
*PAUSE*
Um, OK. Although I thought it'd call itself something like "HOME TO BARRY LEVINSON" or "HOME TO TOM FONTANA," since one or both of them used to call it home.
*PAUSE*
Well, yeah, that's the name of our main college as well. I'm still bummed we lost the Rose Bowl. Second year in a row, too. Man, what a heartbreaker.
*PAUSE*
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK?
*PAUSE*
*silence*
*silence*
*more silence*
*PAUSE*
Let me see what Shaelin thinks.
Huh?
Oh, Blood came up with a name if he and I should team up anytime soon.
*He glances, or more appropriately glares, at the medics, who are still trying to finish stitching his forehead, then leans over and whispers in Shaelin's ear. Shaelin nearly does a dry spit take. Richlen leans away.*
Yeahhhhhhhhhhh, I don't know, man. That sounds pretty bad. And I don't want Jesse King ignoring me more than he already does by going on and on about honey badgers.
*PAUSE*
Uh, I'm not so sure about tonight. Right now, I'd like to finish getting my head stitched together and taking Shaelin somewhere.
*PAUSE*
Yeah, we'll get some more names worked out. Might even see what the others think of 'em.
*PAUSE*
Yeah, I will.
*PAUSE*
kthxbai.
*Richlen hangs up his phone as the medics finish. He leans back and nearly falls off the table.*
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Post by Connor Mackenzie on Jan 11, 2012 10:07:54 GMT -5
Hahahaha...YOU'RE SOOOO F***ING FUNNY YOU MISERABLE PRICK!!!!!
Lou Thesz III walks in and whispers something into Vokoun's ear. Vokoun just takes a deep breath and gives a sly smile. Well....I'm so glad you have all the confidence in the world, Conner. I'm glad your going into this thing with no fear. Because I don't have any fear either. I'm on the roll of a lifetime. As I've stated before Conner....2012 is gonna be the greatest year of my life. You are looking at the Future..King of Wrestlecrap. You are looking at the future....WWCF Interforum Champion (Aaron...where you buddy?) And this year.....in the future...I will be the World Heavyweight Champion. Hell, when I win this tournament...I get a shot at the World Championship. Something that I have long deserved, but was always passed over for. My big buddy Frank Castle...will destory Jonathan Michaels....just like I'm going to destroy the finalist...just like I'm gonna destroy Aaron Enigma....just like...I'm going to destroy you. You can joke all you want Conner. But look into my eyes.....and you see....that I'm not joking.
Miserable. Miserable? Do I look miserable? [/color] Connor looks to see Jesse King who happens to be walking by and stops him. Jesse looks spooked as he tries to get off camera but Connor stops him Jesse, do I look miserable to you? Wait, what's that...[/color] Connor holds up Jesse's arm to see him holding a box, on it is the markings of a Whitey Fats Incorporated Penis Pump. Connor immediately drops King's arm and steps back. My god you sick freak get out of here. Christmas was last month and still you're trying to suck up to Colt![/color] King scrambles off camera as Connor's mouth just hangs open for a moment before turning back to face the camera. And to think that's not the most disturbing thing I've seen all day. Here, let's rewind the tape.[/color] The picture changes to that of Vokoun and Lou Thesz III as Lou whispers something into Vokoun's ear. Vokoun's expression changes and he gives a sly smile. There! Right there! That's the most disturbing thing I've seen all day. Look, can you please not engage in sweet nothings with your lover while trying to address me. Try and have a small amount of professionalism will you. I mean, what you and Lou Thesz's red-headed grandchild do off the clock is up to you and I'm perfectly cool with that choice in life but please don't subject these people to it. Keep your head in the game man.[/color] We hear a groan from behind the camera as Connor stops and points. You're right Mr. Cameraman that was a poor choice of wording there. But let's face it, how can we expect Vokoun to bring his A game when he's got his stomach all aflutter for Mr. Thesz here?[/color] The picture goes back to Vokoun with the sly grin and Thesz just starting to pull away from when he had whispered. We then hear wretching and the picture goes back to Connor who has his head buried in a bucket. Connor pulls his head out and addresses the camera once more. Sorry, I think I'm done, so long as we don't see any more of that.[/color]
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