My Nightlyish PPV Odyssey!: Victory Road 2011 Make-Good

[Shark]

Regarding Kronik vs. Kane/Undertaker, I think the reason that it's merely a bad match and not the huge stinker as it's made out to be is because in the 13 years since, our standards have fallen big time. Something that we look back on as being truly horrible is only just bad now because think about how many awful Rosa Mendes matches we've seen or every terrible Gut Check match in TNA or countless matches from green guys we've seen over the years. We have new standards for what is truly terrible now.


Also Nick Patrick was both corrupt and incompetent. After watching the 100 hours of Nitro, he is easily the worst referee in the history of wrestling.

[Oh Cry Me a Screwball]

Yeah, I never thought Kronik vs. BoD was really that bad. It was boring and went way too long, but it was hardly one of the worst matches in the history of the business.

[Deleted]

I guess since I didn't think the Kronik match was as bad as its reputation, I got a double dose of them tonight!

New Blood Rising

- Maaaan, I wish I didn't know the result of the triple threat match going into this. I imagine my reaction to that would be something special.

-Slapatory?

- That's right, Booker, hate the Game for what's coming in a couple years.

- So Nash thinks Goldberg hasn't earned anything and Goldberg hates Nash, while Steiner doesn't give a shit about either of them. Why is this a triple threat match?

- That guy rooting for Steiner is on the good drugs.

Three Count vs. Jung Dragons

- The four men involved in the three way dance?

- Since when is Tank Abbot the leader of Three Count? He's their groupie.

- Those lily pads are off-center.

- Sing along with Three Count!

- Why the f*** have I never downloaded this song?

- At least this match is pretty fun, if needlessly convoluted given Three Count got both items anyway.

- I doubt I'll have much to say on this match by the way, seen it several times.

- That double Doomsday Device looked pretty damn contrived.

- Hint on telling them apart - Jamie-san is the one with the mask.

- They climbed up ladders in the corners and it wasn't to grab the contract or record? No duh.

- What claim did Jung Dragons have to Three Count's gold record or their recording contract, anyway?

- Wow, that power bomb on Moore was nasty.

- Get up on your feet, put your hands together!

- Did every single late-end WCW PPV have random backstage Cat skits?

- Yeah, taking the mask off Mysterio was a great idea given it took me a minute to realize that was him.

The Great Muta vs. The Cat

- Was there a Terra Ryzing sign in the crowd?

- I'd kind of just rather listen to Three Count's theme than watch this match.

- Yeah, this match sucks, though the song's numbing the pain. Though the song just ended so probably about to get much worse.

- Seriously, who the hell was Tigress? I keep seeing her but I don't know the f*** this is.

- How did that chair shot knock Muta out? That barely hit. And why was the mist not a DQ given the ref full-on saw it?

- Okay, Muta kicked out, nevermind. Still, he should have completely shrugged that off.

- And Miller polishes him off immediately anyway.

JUDY BAGWELL ON A POLE MATCH

- Yeah, this is a night full of legendary shit.

- Why on earth did Positively Kanyon go on as long as it did?

- So they build this thing up as a pole match then at the end they decide that nope, having a normal match with her standing on a forklift for no reason.

- Well, give Tony credit for trying to talk about the match, even if nobody else is.

- Why start playing DDP's music to pop the crowd just to then have David Arquette show up? Why would he even come out to DDP's theme when he was last feuding with him? Since when are he and Kanyon friends? What's with this red pants and white boots?

- "David Arquette, one of the great World champions."

- Wait, this is a pole match with no pole so it's just a normal match, except it's no DQ?

- And despite the random run-in Buff wins easily anyway.

- Give them this, at least they didn't have Judy turn on Buff for Kanyon.

- "Another swerve backstabbing maneuver."

- Worst Diamond Cutter ever.

- God, Mark Madden's annoying.

Kronik vs. Sean O'Haire & Mark Jindrak vs. Misfits in Action vs. The Perfect Event

- Why on earth does this have four special referees?

- All homeless guys have an attitude?

- Christ, what luck did I have to get back-to-back shows featuring Kronik?

- Three enforcers means if you get DQed you have to wrestle polar bears for six months? What the hell does that mean?

- Wait, this isn't elimination, but DQs are in effect?

- Konnan is annoying as hell already and the match hasn't actually started yet.

- I would probably never describe Konnan as a cruiserweight.

- And this match is getting a huge ECW chant. In Canada.

- So why wasn't that a DQ?

- That was the slowest count of all time.

- Kronik and MIA are in the ring and this is the best roster WCW's ever had?

- What on earth is with MIA's outfits anyway? They couldn't be much less coordinated.

- Wow, that Seanton wasn't sold at all.

- Vampiro and Muta run in to bring us up to fifteen people involved in this match counting Konnan.

- What sense does it make to have a heel team being repeatedly screwed over for another heel team by a third heel team, while working with the one team and having the main face team beaten multiple times over?

- And Chavo makes sixteen.

- All it takes to count as a special ref is to be wearing the shirt? And do they realize Chavo just f***ed over his own team?

- Well, true, Tony, Chavo did put this travesty to an end. That's all that really matters.

- Jurassic Slapass?

Shane Douglas vs. Billy Kidman

- Why would anyone in the triple threat match care about what's best for WCW? Besides just to set up the shit later?

- Did Douglas say something about Kidman making a sex tape? Because it was Torrie that did that. More than once.

- Why explain the rules of the type of strap match this isn't?

- And why does someone always come out carrying the strap for these things? Shouldn't there be a regulation procedure for this?

- It's not doing the corner thing, and the strap is so long the guys can be on opposite sides of the ring, so what's even the point?

- How did that sliding out of the ring thing hurt anymore than just running normally?

- Stop talking about the f***ing marquee!

- Oh, okay, three Torrie Wilson sex tapes.

- That neckbreaker looks like it could've looked vicious but it didn't have enough impact to pull it off.

- You can see where Kidman is genuinely trying to give this some fire but Douglas just doesn't seem to give a damn.

- Why are both guys wearing Tommy Hilfiger pants?

- "She's turned heel!"

- Why did Torrie wait until directly after the match to storm in with a chair?

- You know, I'm okay with faces having violence against women, but strapping one to you and then whipping her with the strap seems accessive.

- Stop it with the damn bell!

- Uh, so Douglas is trying to commit murder on live TV?

- STOP WITH THE BELL FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. It's seriously almost nonstop here, not just every now and then.

- How long did that Vito / Reno feud go for?

- Really, they mention the Viagra on a Pole match?

- So Jarrett repeatedly slammed a car door on Booker's leg and we're supposed to buy that he'll be a threat in an hour?

Major Gunns vs. Miss Hancock

- Yeeeeeah. Yeah.

- Are they chanting Flowers?

- Wait, Hancock's pregnant and she's wrestling? Yeah. Yeah, I buy that.

- So, it's a bra and panties match that keeps going with the clothes are ripped off? So what's the point?

- Why is there a mud pit?

- A woman who's pregnant and wrestling has a miscarriage on the spot. Shocking. And a miscarriage consists of holding your stomach like you'll ill, right?

- And why is Major Gunns concerned about Stacy after just having a match with her?

- No, no, NO. Do not have the Demon and Vampiro onscreen at the same time. Not after that Graveyard Match. Why are they allies now anyway?

- They're breaking character, calling her Stacy Keibler, and holding up a script. Stupid as f*** but it'll get worse later.

The Demon vs. Sting

- Stop quoting KISS songs, they're too good for this.

- And now they call the Sting / Vampiro feud a storyline.

- Yeah, descending from the ceiling just over a year after Owen Hart seems like a good idea.

- And thus ends your special main event, everyone!

- Why are they playing Muta like a threat here? Are we supposed to forget he lost almost entirely clean to a joke character earlier in the show?

- So Kronik attacks Vampiro and Muta as revenge for not doing shit earlier in the night in the match where they won the tag titles.

- Another ECDUB chant.

- What did I do to deserve three Kronik matches in two days anyway?

- What was the point of showing a five second shot of Booker screaming besides this company being obsessed with mid-PPV vignettes?

Lance Storm vs. Mike Awesome

- So how did these two get together later anyway?

- It sounds like he's coming out to dead silence to me.

- Shut up, Madden.

- No, he has one belt around his waist, he's carrying the other two.

- No, it's the toughest place in the world to watch.

- This show has an hour left?!

- SHUT UP, MADDEN.

- Kudos to the guy in the Punisher shirt.

- Lance Storm's smiling? This isn't meant to be.

- Is that one guy holding up a Canadian flag sign with a pot leaf on it?

- A special referee to oversee the match, who's a personal idol to Lance Storm. Of course, it's BRET "THE HITMAN"... Rougeau. And that's how you completely kill a suddenly hot crowd.

- If I hear, "This isn't wrestling!" one more time during this show, I f***ing swear...

- So, Awesome's working heel here and yet he just completely utterly squashed Storm and the match only continues due to loophole. Makes sense.

- And then Storm immediately loses again by submission only to again get bailed out. It's almost like this company's f***ing moronic.

- And a third time.

- It's honestly astounding that you can make a guy with three titles look like as massive a joke as Storm does in this match.

- I don't know if I had noticed that the refereee was Slick Johnson until they mentioned it. More focused on how stupid and one-sided this match is.

- And to avoid losing the fourth Storm needs Rougeau to knock Awesome out for him. Nice.

- And then Bret shows up anyway. Why the f*** wasn't he the referee?

- Bret looks so pissed in the process, just like, "Really, they trot me out after that shit?"

- Oh, yeah, you get a VAMPIRO SHIRT for buying this show. So worth it.

Kronik vs. Vampiro & The Great Muta

- Okay, they're spelling it Kronic tonight for some reason. I'm not fixing it.

- Why did Muta not break that pin up? He just stood there gasphing for air, good thing Vampiro kicked out I guess.

- I don't know what they were thinking with the white outline around the text on the logo, it's making it look like the ring is covered in thumbtacks.

- Demon's probably hiding in shame after completely getting his ass kicked.

- You can hear the crowd just give this long sigh when the Harris Brothers show up.

- And they lost them the next night so Vampiro and Muta winning the titles after Kronik already had a match was completely pointless. Why weren't they just in the earlier match anyway?

- "We know your heart will hold up in the ring, but will your knee?" Yeah.

- This show has almost 40 minutes left?!

Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg vs. Scott Steiner

- If the idea is Goldberg is hurt and can't make the match, why is the build being recapped?

- Nope. No, the Wolfpac theme doesn't help this time. Not with what's coming.

- Nash's gear here looks awful. It looks like it says Nask.

- "Who will go over in this match?" Yay, more of what's coming.

- And now they're talking about how Nash has enough power behind the scenes to win this. Yeah, the end of this match really shouldn't have been a surprise to anyone.

- Really, they do a zoom-in and a loooong hold on a GOLDBERG FEARS GILLBERG sign? Really? REALLY?!

- This match is honestly already pretty agonizing to sit through, mostly the commentary about how Goldberg is being unprofessional and might not do the right thing.

- Uh, what's it matter for Nash to have to deal with Goldberg and Steiner at the same time? That's not what's happening, Steiner's beating Goldberg into paste.

- Did he say Goldberg's streak ended at Starrcade 88?

- Well, at least for now the commentators are playing it as a straight match. Still sucks.

- The answer is Steiner's an idiot and if two guys in a triple threat match would rather ignore you, let them.

- Goldberg's going off script! And he yelled, "F*** you!" at Russo! SO EDGY.

- Now Steiner and Nash have to improvise something, but they're pros unlike Goldberg. Yeah.

- "We've got people going into business for themselves all over here!"

- This match might actually be an easier sit if you muted it. You'd still have the Jackknife being no-sold and Goldberg storming out, but at least you wouldn't have this stupid, "If the Jackknife ending it was part of the original design, they might have to improvise something!" shit.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Booker T

- Their evidence of Jarrett being a badass is him saying, sounding out of breath, "We'll call it slapnuts theater!"

- I prefer my Chosen One vs. People's Champion to be Drew McIntyre vs. The Rock, thank you very much.

- Nineteen minutes left, on what'll probably be a decent match. I can do this. I hope.

- Though seriously, this is the first time I've gotten a good enough look at it to tell what it is, but what is with that Canadian flag with Scott Steiner's face? And where can I get one?

- This song's just making me think I could be watching some Kids in the Hall instead of this show.

- I really don't have a lot to say here, I've seen Booker / Jarrett more than once and this somehow doesn't seem as good as their Bash at the beach one.

- It is kind of picking up I'll grant, is a pretty decent story here of Booker trying to work any way he can to wear Jarrett down but Jarrett keeping control by focusing on the leg.

- Why was that chairshot not a DQ? The referee was standing less than a foot away and looking dead at it.

- And another chairshot right in front of the ref.

- Not sure how a Boston crab wears down the leg, particularly at the angle Jarrett has it.

- Checking Wikipedia to see if I missed a stipulation. it says every match on this card was no DQ but they never formally announced it. Then why was there a ref bump in Juggalos / Kronik?

- And a ref bump here for the guitar shot, while they play up how the referee doesn't see it. So why were the chair shots okay?

- "Aw, shit!"

- And the ref was just threatening to DQ him if he didn't let go of the figure four so... Yeah, chairs are just inexplicably okay.

- Yeah, this match really overdoes it on the leg thing. They shouldn't have done that stupid parking lot attack earlier, it's too one-sided.

- On paper the Bookend off the apron through the table's a cool spot but... Yeah, that got botched badly.

- Why is the crowd chanting for Hogan? I know, Bash at the Beach and stuff, but still, why?

- Another ref bump, this time to get away with a chairshot.

- And he doesn't bother getting the chair out of the ring before going for the pin.

- Stop calling them bumps!

- That was a terrible neckbreaker. Yeah, this match has completely fallen apart.

- Kudos on the callback to the Bash at the Beach ending, at least, even if Tony's too beaten down to care and the other two are f***ing idiots.

- We go out on the crowd pelting the ring with trash after this godawful show. I threw a nearby Jello cup at the TV in unison.


No, don't f***ing watch it. It's not even a fun kind of bad, this show is just terrible. See the ladder match on whichever of the DVD sets devoted to those that it's on but otherwise, stay the hell away from this, even as a curiosity factor on the Nash / Goldberg / Steiner stupidity.

It's not going to get worse than that for awhile, I'm certain. I know that's tempting fate, but I feel confident in saying that. Let's see what it will be exactly though, and it is. . . Anarchy Rulz 2000. Know what, f*** it, I'm positive it's better than what I just watched.

[Oh Cry Me a Screwball]

Look at the bright side, Kronik never wrestled in ECW, unless you count the Alliance as such, in which case you have already put that one match behind you anyway.

[Deleted]

Anarchy Rulz 2000

- Seeing as it is not present 1997, I'll assume the name of the show is pronounced Anarchy Rolls.

- That is the most 90s collection of T-shirts imaginable. Yes, four months into 2000 counts as the 90s, I doubt everyone had just bought those before the show.

- Why are we opening with bragging about how amazingly successful Joel Gertner is with women?

- If anarchy rules that's still technically a rule.

- I imagine Rhino and Tajiri will get better treatment on this show than the last one I watched featuring them. I'm assuming Tajiri's on the card, he was prominently shown in the opening and all.

- That was some serious airtime.

- And as part of this opening, true to what I said on Final Four, we see New Jack jumping off a balcony in the crowd.

Christian York & Joey Matthews vs. Danny Doring & Roadkill

- They didn't introduce the first team, so I started to joke that the one guy looked like a young Joey Mercury, but then on looking up the names of the team I recognized the Matthews name as being him. So alrighty then.

- Did he just call Roadkill a chicken f***er?

- Oh, it's chicken choker. So much better.

- The audio on this show is terrible even compared to past ECW shows I've watched as part of this, I can barely understand anything.

- How did that rumored Roadkill repackage and push in WWE not pan out anyway? The guy seems pretty agile and flashy for someone his size.

- Yeeeeah, that one warranted a holy shit chant. I'm amazed Doring could stand up after that.

- Weird choice to start this with what is basically a complete squash match.

- That was a really fast count.

- So they're both faces? That makes an opening squash even weirder.

- So why is this Cyrus stuff on PPV? What sense does that make?

- It seems contradictory to the point of his character to be calling Gertner out for a fight and calling him a fatass and a bitch.

- Is Spike coming out to an instrumental of Touch Too Much?

- Even having jacked the audio up I can't hear Spike.

Kid Kash vs. EZ Money

- What, no Ponce Pound or David Dollars in this?

- How the hell did that accidental suicide dive spot even happen?

- This match kind of seems like nothing but a series of near falls, so really not much to say about it to this point. Feels too long for what it's supposed to be.

- That might be the most idiotic referee of all time, which is saying a lot. With people at ringside what's even the point of a ref distraction in ECW?

- And after that beating Kash just gives us another near fall anyway. Not that anyone bought that after the promo that led into this, no way he's losing here.

- Yep, Kash overcomes it all to win anyway.

- And suddenly the audio gets better for a minute only to die out again. Guessing the reason is that Kash's theme is dubbed in, particularly given that Kid Rock reference to bring him out, and they dubbed in new crowd noise over it.

- What's even the point of Sandman if he doesn't get his entrance first? Not just dubbed over, I mean they straight don't bother with it.

Joel Gertner vs. Cyrus

- Call me crazy but I figure this'll be short.

- Joelberg was kind of clever.

- The Kamala thing though is just random.

- Seriously, if you're not Rock, don't try the People's Elbow. It doesn't work.

- Again, really fast counter there.

- Now we get what was presumably Enter Sandman on the original show. Again the sound balancing goes really awkward.

The Baldies vs. Balls Mahoney & Chilly Willy

- What on earth is with that face? Also, that's a new contender for the worst tag team name ever.

- Joey sounds really bored, presumably because he's watching this match.

- A powerbomb on a chair gets a holy shit chant?

- Well, that was short and pointless. I guess a heel had to win eventually on this show though so that was its only purpose.

- It's ECW, don't try to sell Balls bleeding slightly as a major deal requiring EMTs.

- So why swap commentators halfway through the show?

- "Hey, Jerry, why were you an unlockable in SmackDown 3?"

CW Anderson vs. Steve Corino

- Did Punk base his early look on Corino?

- This entire match consists of WOOing from the crowd seemingly.

- That chair shot looked really contrived.

- Really, for a company all about being extreme, it seems like most of their PPVs are just standard fare matches with an occasional chair shot out of obligation that usually just drags the match down.

- The chant was also undeserved there.

- Old School Expulsion? What does that name even mean?

- And again, music starts playing and the crowd is suddenly a million times louder.

- It seems hard to read a book that's on fire.

- ECW WORLD TELEVISION CHAMPION. Rhino's kind of a shitty promo.

- "Shove it up your f***ing ass!"

The FBI vs. Mikey Whipwreck & Yoshihiro Tajiri

- Why not dub in the FBI's WWE theme? At least it actually sounds like the song it's replacing.

- So, Satanist Mikey Whipwreck is dressed as Mickey Mouse while Tajiri seems to be Jem.

- That really is a Mickey Mouse hat, you can see the ears on it close-up.

- Way to waste the mist spitting it in the air before the match even starts.

- Now a standard baseball slide gets an ECDUB chant?

- As does a shot to the balls?

- Y'know, it kind of takes away from Guido being annoyed over the, "Where's my pizza?!" chant for him to immediately use a move called the Sicillian Slice.

- Kind of a short nothing match, was expecting better honestly.

- At least the sound balancing on the end is a bit better this time. Though you can still kind of see that the crowd really isn't reacting that much.

Rhino vs. Rob Van Dam

- Funny how Rhino and Jerry Lynn have gotten promos but RVD and Justin Credible haven't.

- Most blatant dubbing in the world. They didn't put in different songs for RVD and Rhino or even put in a break, the song just kept playing throughout.

- So why wasn't RVD the ECW champion by this point anyway, besides that Heyman was honestly often a pretty poor booker and / or afraid he'd jump ship at a moment's notice?

- That throw through the barricade looked pretty cool.

- Rhyno's gear here is honestly pretty decent. Better than the more plain stuff he'd largely wear in WWE and TNA.

- Did Rhyno just jam his shoulder into the barricade on purpose? That's what that appeared to be.

- How do spears in the corner hurt less than spears in the middle of the ring, anyway?

- It helps to try and lift somebody by the arms instead of the hair.

- Why are they setting up a new table where the one Rhino just put RVD through was?

- That Van Damminator really should be the finish in terms of the story going on here but I know it's not.

- Why did Justin Credible get involved? And how did RVD knock himself out with the Van Terminator?

- What was the point of a fast count there? RVD still was most definitely out of it.

- "Lot of people don't like it but too damn bad." That goes for both the Rhyno and Justin Credible pushes.

- Yay for stalling and recaps since the show has over a half hour left but only one match.

- Seriously, they're recapping every single f***ing move in the match. I might as well just be watching it twice.

- Fonzie was in that match with Beulah, I don't buy this as some life-threatening injury they've spent so damn long trying to sell this as.

- Cyrus doesn't like seeing anyone knocked out, except earlier when he knocked Gertner out to take his place in the booth.

- Stop recapping it already!

Jerry Lynn vs. Justin Credible

- Yay for Jakked matches main-eventing PPVs!

- "The Game" Justin Credible.

- That entrance drawn out long enough?

- And why did they wait to announce that the match is for the title after Credible had been in the ring for an eternity, anyway? And why did he come out first? Then again, Rhyno did too.

- Well, duh, no wonder they're not showing respect to him.

- Yay for more stalling.

- Seriously, maaaaan this match has a metric ton of playing to the crowd to start out. It's not quite the same thing but it's so long waiting for something to actually happen it feels like Lesnar / Goldberg.

- At least once they do finally get to it it's very quickly paced to start.

- This is decent so far, but it's pretty much every generic brawl where the underdog face is getting stomped en route to a miracle win. Sure it'll start getting overbooked soon.

- Seriously, it detracts from the (pointless any) fast count earlier when every single count in this promotion is fast, and removes a lot of drama from a kickout in the process.

- Stay classy, ECW fans. Ugh.

- Mid-match promo, woo. Typically someone should be decent on the mic if they're going to do that.

- Throwing full drinks in the ring during a match less than a year removed from Droz. Nice.

- Hooray, buffering with like eight minutes left to go on the show after running smoothly all night.

- Did you seriously expect the evil referee to count the pin for you? Really? And why is this guy when he's doing this in multiple matches where he is not the appointed ref not fired, particularly given the commentary's basically not even mentioned it meaning it's probably been going on for awhile?

- Why didn't the evil referee just fast count him?

- Yeah, the count he gave Rhyno that wasn't needed because RVD was basically dead anyway and laid there for awhile after the fact.

- Yeah, ref, that's why you don't pause to flip someone off before you count the three.

- New Jack time, lemme pause this and put on some Natural Born Killaz.

- Wouldn't it make more sense for RVD to be doing this, since the ref supposedly screwed him over earlier and Credible attacked him before that?

- Y'know, before the referee nonsense this match was kind of good.

- Funny how the music stops the second Credible lays New Jack out.

- This ending celebration is really awkward without any commentary to talk about how big it is. Don't know if it's dubbed over due to the music or just they thought they'd let the moment stand or what. Guessing the latter since there isn't any after the music cuts off either.


All in all, not a great show, but fine for what it was. Dragged a bit since a lot of it's inconsequential and you can tell ECW's roster was in very rough shape at this point, but it is what it is. It couldn't hurt to give it a look if you're in the mood but it wouldn't be my first choice.

Let's see what we've got up next then. And it shall be... St. Valentine's Day Massacre. Honestly kind of kept expecting that to come up, for some reason.

[67 more]

Lizuka, I've got to ask, how does a ripoff of No Sleep Til Brooklyn sound at all like Stayin Alive by N-Trance?

[Deleted]

Oct 1, 2014 5:06:33 GMT -5 67 more said:

Lizuka, I've got to ask, how does a ripoff of No Sleep Til Brooklyn sound at all like Stayin Alive by N-Trance?

I could've sworn I'd heard that they used No Sleep Til Brooklyn in ECW. If you couldn't tell though, it's not a company I have that much exposure to outside of stray matches from WWE's compliations and such.

[67 more]

Oct 1, 2014 5:15:14 GMT -5 Lizuka #BLM said:

Oct 1, 2014 5:06:33 GMT -5 67 more said:

Lizuka, I've got to ask, how does a ripoff of No Sleep Til Brooklyn sound at all like Stayin Alive by N-Trance?

I could've sworn I'd heard that they used No Sleep Til Brooklyn in ECW. If you couldn't tell though, it's not a company I have that much exposure to outside of stray matches from WWE's compliations and such.

No, they never used it in ECW. It doesn't help that Jim Johnston would tend to do soundalikes of ECW alumni's themes though (Balls, Tommy, RVD), so that may be another reason you thought they used that.

[Shark]

I decided to watch this last night too, mainly because I've watched very little ECW on the Network. I also noticed the fast counting and how they completely removed any drama from the near falls.


I also noticed you've gotten a break from the Benoit matches. He's not been on any shows the past few times.

[Deleted]

Yeah, running late on this. Myriad of reasons, but mostly blame Smash Bros.

St. Valentine's Day Massacre

- Okay, evidently this show is sponsored by the Vaudevillains. And / or Big Show's old titantron.

- I'm kind of inclined to recommend turning this show on long enough to see this opening package. Just. . . Yeah, what is even the hell?

- Oh, right, the Luke Gallows theme comes from this show. Could they just not get a sponsor or what?

- Ha, sure, Last Man Standing matches are final. Whatever you say.

Goldust vs. Bluedust

- Bluedust is Goldust's namesake says Michael Cole.

- Why is Cole shouting every single word? Compared to King it's really distracting.

- I don't need to see naked Blue Meanie, cut away!

- And the actual match is pretty much just more of the same.

- That was a very clean moonsault from Meanie, kind of impressed.

- Well, at least it was short.

- Man, Goldust looks a lot like Stardust on this show. I'm not sure what it is but there's just something about him.

- Why are they playing Austin's music over a recap for no reason?

- Really, this isn't even a recap, it's just the entire segment being replayed apparently except they dubbed Austin's music over the audio so Cole could narrate over it for no reason.

Al Snow vs. Bob Holly

- And somehow these two fighting over Road Dogg's vacant title led to them facing Billy Gunn at Mania. Russo!

- Hardcore Holly had a cup of coffee as Intercontinental Champion, in the sense that he's never won it including after this match.

- Who calls a pay phone a telephone?

- Bob Halley.

- Nah, Al has to wait and win it from Head later.

- Cole was doing that, "Lookit!" bullshit even back then.

- This feels more like a WCW Hardcore title match, by which I mean it's just random brawling with no build-up to the assorted weapons and nothing being sold enough to have any impact to it.

- Uh, no, he's a wrestler by trade, Cole.

- Ha, what? King just mentioned Sparky Plugg.

- "I'd like you to meet my girlfriend, her name is Barbwire!" Is that a reference to the movie? That's the only way I can perceive that as a joke.

- Has there been a single wrestling move in this match?

- Even if it weren't obvious Snow's head wasn't hitting the tire, how would that even hurt?

- "From behind, with a stick!"

- And the most extreme thing of the match so far is Holly saying, "F***."

- Snow had an arm in the air. How the hell was that a valid pin?

- Holly is the fourth Hardcore Championship in WWF history.

- Cameraman, stop being a prick and get him out of that fence!

- Remember when for awhile after this match they talked it up as an all-time great extreme brawl? It's not. It's really not.

- Undertaker's Ministry of Hobos apparently.

- Seriously, it's a bunch of guys standing around a trashcan fire in the parking lot talking like D&D players, while Bradshaw is wearing a muscle shirt and has a mustache like he's a security guard there to make sure things don't get out of hand.

Big Bossman vs. Mideon

- Christ, there is no chance this match will be any good.

- Ugh, I forgot about how Mideon had that stupid thing with the eye.

- Well, he's formerly known as a lot of things.

- Remember, folks, this is the match for the guy who's main eventing WrestleMania if Austin loses later.

- Seriously, the chairshot against the post never works.

- Nah, it turns out this whole thing is an elaborate plan to make Austin lose the title even though he hasn't won it yet and, in fact, since they appear to be feuding they could cut Austin off at the knees tonight if so desired since unlike the Corporation the Ministry can get involved in the main event.

- Is that a boring chant? It should be.

- Yeah, being buried alive kind of changes a man.

- Well, at least it was short. Didn't feel like it.

- And that stupid botch-filled match leads into the set-up for the first of the only two Hell in a Cell matches at Mania!

- Why are they showing Taker's entrance instead of Bossman being beaten?

- Then again when they cut back not like much was missed.

- Why were Christian and Gangrel continuing to hold Bossman down? Figure he was pretty definitely out after two splashes from Viscera.

- They should've brainwashed Bossman into a Ministry member. How goofy would that have been?

- Actually really it just turns out to be a Raw where the Rumble winner gets a title shot for some reason.

Owen Hart & Jeff Jarrett vs. D'Lo Brown & Mark Henry

- The Sexual Chocolate theme has a whole different connotation when it's two guys coming out to it.

- What kind of threat is that? Wouldn't it be more effective to say something like, "If you interfere, I'll kick your ass"?

- This show's only been on 40 minutes?!

- Yeah, not sure how Cole accidentally called D'Lo the European Champion. Not had it in awhile.

- Owen couldn't have looked much more generic here.

- How do you botch a diving fist drop that badly?

- That was a really, really forced Wrestling With Shadows reference.

- Man, this crowd has completely given up and the show's not even an hour in yet.

- Y'know, Debra didn't really prevent the Lo Down there, Owen recovered way too quickly anyway.

- Seriously, Mark Henry couldn't roll over a figure four and didn't even try? Guess it at least makes the Rusev thing consistent.

- Foley's beard looks a bit scruffier than normal.

- Why was he standing around without the mask on anyway?

- Oh, shit, a free photo magnet!

Ken Shamrock vs. Val Venis

- Ha, the credit said Ken Shamrock's Sister.

- "His head is gonna explode!" Funny, so is Val's.

- Billy Gunn refereeing the Intercontinental title match. Totally makes sense he was going for the Hardcore title the next month while his tag partner faced these two.

- Billy looks to be in a really good mood for someone whose tag partner was attacked and injured the night before.

- Uh, it'd be his first title period, Cole.

- Why is King talking about Siskel and Ebert?

- I hope Ryan wasn't expecting fidelity in this relationship.

- This show had a lot of stuff being announced for it the night before, didn't it?

- And here I thought I was finally going to get a match that was actually interesting but nope.

- Why is Billy slow-counting for Val?

- And how is Val the face for banging Shamrock's sister to rile him up into giving him a title shot?

- Rather hard to read Ryan's lips when she's not onscreen.

- Seriously, why is one anti-Corporation face slow-counting another anti-Corporation face against a member of the group?

- Man, this match just goes on and on it seems like.

- And after all that Val wins after a fast count. Yep.

- Cole is so, so much worse on this show than he is today.

- "It's not just a sock, it's an adventure!"

- Wait, could I still send a money order to that address for the Socko shirt? They didn't black it out.

Triple H & X-Pac vs. Kane & Chyna

- And then it turned out that Chyna was actually working with DX the whole time, and then it turned out that she wasn't and neither was Triple H.

- So why was the Triple H / Kane cage match on Raw instead of on PPV?

- Man, Chyna is bad on the mic.

- Why didn't Triple H have his own music in DX anyway? I guess the line of thought on it was that since he was the leader he was the one flying their banner, but it didn't fit since he got the music in the first place from being Michaels's flunky. Then again it does fit with how he was the least interesting, least over part of DX.

- Weird, announced as Hunter Hearst Helmsley.

- Triple H and X-Pac are soulmates?

- Kane's shirt being wet looks weird. Combined with the red light it's making it look like his chest is bleeding.

- I like that every two-person combination of these four has been a group at some point.

- This is the first time a woman in a match with men? Like, say, the Royal Rumble? Which you mentioned immediately afterward?

- Nice that Shane is out there seemingly only to talk up the main event and presumably to set up his feud with X-Pac.

- Chyna, you can tag him, y'know.

- Chyna may avoid it now, but we all know she eventually got a private Bronco Buster.

- See, Kane is familiar with the concept of a blind tag.

- Seems weird to be wearing the red and black tights when facing Kane.

- Chyna's part of the Corporation because she's the reason for Triple H's success... so why was Triple H allowed in it the next month?

- Shane's kind of striking a good balance here, where he's being annoying on purpose but not enough so that it's ruining the match. if anything it's giving more entertainment value than there really is otherwise.

- Yep, Mania set up there.

- Yeah, now it's annoying. Shane should've been knocked out by X-Pac nailing him instead of getting up to scream in rage over it.

- SQUEEZE IT. SQUEEEEEZE IT.

- That was the most devestating Chokeslam of all time apparently.

- The guy who just got pinned by Chyna was a three time WWF Champion by the end of the year, everybody!

The Rock vs. Mankind

- Oh, Cesaro's here.

- Yeah, that'll put butts in seats.

- What's with the random photograph sound effects?

- Well, that's what you deserve for carrying around a bag containing $100,000 and leaving it unattended.

- "Lower extremities." It's called a knee, Cole.

- I'm not understanding Foley's strategy here. Is he just supposed to be trying to mock Rock or what? Because it doesn't seem to be working.

- Really, the first move Mick does gets an eight count?

- Ha, yeah, he dislocated his knee this morning and is having a match, even after it being attacked again later in the day. Totally believe that.

- Why is there a small section of seats in a backstage area anyway? Not sure what the point of that would even be.

- Again, nobody but Rock can do the People's Elbow.

- I love that Rock would rather steal Cole's chair than sit in the empty one next to him.

- Also, I've always preferred Rock in his breast reduction gear over in trunks. More unique and fits the gimmick better.

- Why grab two chairs? The Conchairto hasn't been invented yet.

- Give Rock credit for staggering a bit on the leg the stairs accidentally hit.

- GOD DARN IT.

- And then immediately after that Cole yells, "DAMN IT!" Really? Then why the f*** didn't you say it sooner?

- I love the idea of someone singing mid-Last Man Standing match. Helps stave off how boring they usually are.

- Really? A ref bump in a Last Man Standing match? Really? And why isn't the referee obviously standing on the ramp doing anything?

- Even getting past the cop-out of it being a draw, that is a very weak ending to an otherwise pretty good match.

- "Bullshit! Bullshit! Bullshit!"

- I imagine watching live people were quite concerned about it being 10:15 and the only match left being Austin / Vince.

- Yeah, there's some hardcore filler going on here already.

- Well, Mankind would be going to WrestleMania, except Shawn Michaels is a dick.

Steve Austin vs. Vince McMahon

- So Austin will leave bloodied and beaten because he's a sicko and wants to hurt Vince. I don't think King was paying attention to what Cole was saying.

- Or that time Austin faced Chyna on Raw, guess that doesn't count as a match between a man and a woman earlier.

- I love that they specifically announced Vince as the winner by pinning Austin. Good douchey way to do it, like I guarantee Vince ordered that long beforehand.

- JERRY KIDS.

- This really should have been the end of Vince / Austin. They should've written Vince out for a long while here and then had Austin blast through the rest of the Corporation en route to beating Rock at Mania along with X-Pac beating Shane. Though that would have kind of killed the whole turning Triple H heel and Rock face thing I guess.

- Seen this match before so might kind of waver how much I have to say on it.

- Actually, where did I last see this match? Was it on the McMahon DVD? That's the only option I can think of, I don't have any Austin DVDs or any of the cage match ones. But it's been years since I've seen that DVD (should rewatch it honestly, pretty decent) and it feels like it's only been a year or two since I watched this.

- Well, he's like a caged animal in a cage they can climb out of.

- How did Vince expect it to help him get away from Austin to run inside of the cage?

- Since they've now both been in the cage, does Austin technically win since he was the first to touch the floor afterward?

- So is the implication supposed to be that Vince had some other new hire waiting in the crowd?

- Combined with Mania 19 this pretty definitively answers that in a dream match between Hogan and Austin Austin would win, right?

- That's nothing, four years later Vince did that to himself on purpose.

- What was that being blurred in the crowd? Something was blurred there.

- Surely it'd be quicker for Austin to go through the door.

- Why did that one ref fall over? Austin never touched him.

- So why didn't Big Show bust out when Vince was being hauled out? Had Austin just taken the forfeit would he have just stayed down there until they packed the ring up?

- How did Austin know Vince was flipping him off? He wasn't looking at him.

- Seriously, Big Show took his sweet ass time, huh? This match is honestly pretty hilarious if you keep thinking about that because right from the get-go he's the most bastard on the planet.

- Was the trigger just to wait until he heard a Stunner, is that it? Did Vince tell him to no matter what not come up until Austin hit one?

- How did the commentators not notice the ring shaking and ripping?

- WWE 13 lied to me, Big Show wasn't in his trunks when he debuted! And he didn't have brown hair and a ponytail either!

- And now with like three minutes left to go it's buffering.

- So why didn't Vince leave while Big Show was beating Austin down? He didn't have to stay in there.

- Honestly it comes off like they should have done something with it like Vince won then Austin had to beat somebody or other on Raw to earn the title shot thanks to Michaels declaring Big Show's interference as violating the no-Corporation rule.


The main event's pretty fun but it goes on too long, the tag match is decent, and the Last Man Standing match is good before the ending, but the rest of this show is just awful. If you do want to see this, just skip to the tag match and watch from there, you can comfortably miss everything that comes before it. And even the three good matches aren't worth going out of the way for.

Next up, we've got... Starrcade 1994. I know nothing about what's on it other than judging by the poster Hogan probably won in the main event.

Wait, wait, is that the one where he faced Beefcake? If so... Shit.

[Oh Cry Me a Screwball]

Oct 3, 2014 23:49:03 GMT -5 Lizuka #BLM said:

- Hardcore Holly had a cup of coffee as Intercontinental Champion, in the sense that he's never won it including after this match.

Bob Holly was Intercontinental Champion in the same sense Chris Jericho was the WWF champ in 2000. Holly pinned Double J for the title, but his foot was on the rope, which is officially recognized as a Vacant title run, and then Jarrett won the title again later that night.

[Deleted]

Starrcade 1994

- Like Jean Paul Levesque ever amounted to anything.

- Was his finisher seriously the Tree of Woe? Seriously? Please tell me this intro isn't accurate.

- Really, they cut to a guy dressed as Santa with his beard down? WCW!

- Aaron Tippin is someone I know the name of but I can't name anything he sings.

- Wow, this is a very hickish performance.

- What is the point of this Savage promo besides just to talk up how awesome Hogan is?

- Seriously, this might be the worst Savage promo I've ever heard. I have absolutely no clue what he's talking about.

- And now they're showing a PWI award presentation to Hogan. Seriously, can we have any, like, matches tonight?

- Seriously, are they playing this entire ceremony?

- If nothing else I appreciate the mentions of Thunder in Paradise.

- What was I waiting for a minute for? Play more, don't leave me in suspense!

Vader vs. Jim Duggan

- Vader looks in really bad shape on this show. Also he's dancing again.

- Did Vader ever have a match where he managed to keep his mask on the whole time?

- That was actually a very crisp slam on Vader, credit where it's due.

- This match is pretty weird to behold so far actually. Vader seems lazy and out of breath but Duggan has a fire lit under his ass and seems determined to make it work.

- And Vader's punches here look terrible.

- That was a pretty blatant pair of low blows.

- Yeah, this is just dragging by now.

- At least Tony quickly corrected the stupidity of calling that a double clothesline.

- What was Vader even trying for there besides getting powerslammed?

- Kudos for setting up the obvious ref bump and then not doing it.

- Well, that move looked botched as hell.

- "No, no, I mean who did you get to make this tombstone? It looks like it's made out of cardboard."

- Avalanche's nipples are distracting.

Jean Paul Levesque vs. Alex Wright

- That was Triple H's WCW theme? Really? How does that remotely fit his gimmick?

- Kind of digging Wright's theme at least.

- Sting's facepaint tonight looks suspiciously like a pair of sunglasses.

- This'd make for an interesting list, people who've competed at both a WrestleMania and a Starrcade.

- Said alliance would then fall apart over their differing opinions on the mentally handicapped.

- With the ponytail down Trips has some pretty marvelous hair here.

- Random cut to Aaron Tippin, presumably because this match has nothing actually going on in it.

- What's with the delays after the matches end to start playing the music? First it happened with Vader, now with Wright.

Johnny B. Bad vs. Arn Anderson

- Nice of them to hype up Honky Tonk Man for this match at the start of the show when they knew they couldn't deliver on it.

- Mero's so pissed off over the guitar shot he's dancing and firing confetti into the crowd. You'd figure if anything he'd be angrier since he can't get revenge.

- Well, it's certainly new to hear a heel commentator say that the town they're in should be nuked.

- Man, this is boring.

- Yeah, Arn seriously just does not seem to give a damn here. From the word go he's stalling like crazy and using endless rest holds, which seems pretty backwards for the challenger in a TV title match.

- Well, at least with Badd in control the pace is picking up slightly.

- So, Arn only lost due to being an idiot. Also that seemed like a fast count.

- Woo, another PWI awards segment. Fun.

The Nasty Boys vs. Harlem Heat

- Harlem Heat had good matches as a team every now and then, right? Because I'm sure this isn't going to be one.

- When were they changed to being Booker T and Stevie Ray anyway? They were Kane and Kole at Superbrawl earlier this same year.

- Booker and Stevie should've tried the twin magic thing. They look nothing alike but some people wouldn't be able to tell the difference.

- The World's Saggiest Slam.

- Why are the Nasty Boys the ones working like heels here?

- Now Harlem Heat's doing it. So really the match just keeps going back and forth between one side controlling for minutes at a time and the other.

- Saggs' face really reminds me of somebody, I'm not sure who.

- Do like the continuity of bringing up Triple H's arrogance potentially costing him was a sign that Harlem Heat should be more focused.

- Why randomly bring up the idea of hiring Meng to have a street fight for you?

- After almost twenty minutes of that shit it ends in a DQ?!

- Hooray, more PWI.

- Sting's decided to swap out his sunglasses for what appears to be Superman ice cream and doesn't match his tights.

- Judging by the fingers, the one thing Sting wants to mention is that Earthquake has a tiny dick.

Kevin Sullivan vs. Mr. T

- They're seriously trying to claim this is the first match Mr. T's ever had? Really?

- Why is Mr. T dressed in a referee's pajamas?

- Don't let Chicago hear you say that or you'll get lynched by a mob of Punk fans.

- So that Santa Claus thing all night actually is going somewhere. Maybe.

- How many shirts is Mr. T wearing? And who wrestles in a tie?

- Hulkaphone, really?

- Well, at least it was short.

- Hogan sure is nice to help out while Evad is being beaten to a pulp.

- Yeah, it's going to be trouble for a lot of people that the guy who just lost to Mr. T is pissed off.

- A Faces of Death stable would be so much better.

- People outside of Li'l' Abner used the word druthers?

- Yeah, Beefcake probably is on an ultimate high right now.

- The rulebook is on the line?

- Actually, no, Hogan's probably on the ultimate high judging by that promo.

- It says a lot about how terrible an idea this main event is that they're building it more around, "What will Savage do?" than, "Is Hogan in danger of losing the title?"

Avalanche vs. Sting

- What's ironic about that?

- That sobering feeling is hitting me when you realize that Jim Duggan was in the match of the night. And carried it.

- And more talk about PWI.

- Really? They're talking up how smart Kevin Sullivan is immediately after he got outsmarted by Mr. T and Evad?

- So, the story of the match is, "Can Sting get the Deathlock on?!" He does during a ref bump and immediately lets it go. That's about right.

- Oh, sure, Hogan will help Sting.

- And it ends in the second DQ of the night. Nice.

- Beavis & Butthead and Forrest Gump mentions. Oh, 1994.

- Seriously, stop with the PWI shit!

- So Jimmy Hart died sometime the next year then.

Hulk Hogan vs. The Butcher

- Honkamaniac?

- Why?! Why?! Why?!

- Man, Hogan has been a prick to Mean Gene several times over in these clips they've been showing through the night.

- Yeah, two masked men. That totally wasn't a retcon.

- "Hogan comes to the ring to save Sting and you treat him like a savior!"

- Really? Somebody's sign is just HULK RULES on fax paper.

- What was with how long they kept using Buffer for this sort of thing, anyway?

- Ha, I love that Hogan's introduction mentions that he beat Flair. That's just such a Hulk thing to make them include.

- HULK-MANIA.

- Why does Hogan's music start playing again once he gets introduced? Complete with pyro?

- So, if Avalanche and Sullivan are sent to the back, why isn't Jimmy Hart?

- Hogan nailed Beefcake with a running chair shot then choked him with the chair. One, how's that not a DQ? Second, top face, everyone!

- I guess it's okay with Beefcake completely shrugged it off.

- Is the appeal of the match supposed to be Hogan completely squashing his friend who stabbed him in the back? Because it isn't working and Hogan's just coming off like a dick who completely outclasses his opponent.

- Actually, he's using a nerve hold, kick his ass, Hulk.

- Shut up about PWI!

- The sad thing is this is one of the best matches on the show. That's not a compliment.

- Nice of the Faces of Fear to just stand there and stare as Hogan got the three. Also to hype up Savage running in they have Hogan effortlessly beat them up by himself before he gets there.

- Seriously, they've run the heels out and this show still has twelve minutes left even with Hogan's theme playing.

- Uh, Hogan, you're the one who was cheating in the match, Beefcake worked completely clean.

- Ha, yeah, Hogan needs to be afraid of the guy who completely got his ass kicked by Jim Duggan and was beaten multiple times over before he got a fluke win.

- The Heavyweight US Heavyweight Champion.

- They're seriously selling Vader yelling at Hogan for a title shot then shoving him as being hugely out of line to the point of repeatedly apologizing to viewers for how shocking it is? F***ing really?


Well, that was awful. Not the worst show I've seen in this, it'll be hardpressed to top Bunkhouse Stampede, but it was still a long, boring mess with way too much stupid crap clogging it up and really not a single match worth seeing.

Next up, we'll hopefully have something that's if not better is at least easier to talk about. And that'll be. . . Backlash 2002. That took longer than I expected.

[Shark]

I long since gave up on watching the matches the Nasty Boys had in WCW. They're all so long and BORING!

[Deleted]

Backlash 2002

- Let me just say as part of this thoing this that it's always been very, very rare for a PPV to not end with at least around fifteen minutes left to spare.

- Yeah, it is a history-making night in the World Wrestling Federation, mostly in regards to the name. And if you ignore Insurrextion.

Tajiri vs. Billy Kidman

- That Torrie and Tajirii relationship lasted for an unusually long amount of time for a pointless midcard romance like that.

- Also, did Kidman just end up feuding with every single person who ever had anything to do with Torrie or what?

- You're not supposed to beg the question, JR! Poor writing etiquette!

- You know, it's probably not helping the fact that the crowd's mostly just hung up on Torrie here that the commentators are focusing on her instead of the match.

- Though the crowd is getting pretty hot for this one as it goes. Good fast-paced match here.

- And now Kidman's more over than most people today are.

- Everybody talks too much.

- What sort of expression was that on Torrie? It was supposed to be faux-happiness I'm pretty sure but she looked more like she was trying to feign concern for an insurance scam or something.

Bradshaw vs. Scott Hall

- X-Pac looks so stupid with that Kane mask on.

- Kevin Nash was presumably suspended indefinitely because of blowing his quad.

- Yeah, this two man nWo is in danger of completely consuming the company.

- Quite the demotion for Hall in tersm of which drunken redneck he was facing, huh?

- The APA thing is weird to me. Is the implication supposed to be that these people can't even call each other if they're on different brands?

- Yeah, this sucks. Shocking, isn't it?

- Hurtin' for certain.

- Why was that not a DQ? The ref full on saw X-Pac put Hall's foot on the rope then slap Bradshaw in the face.

- How do you botch a low blow?

- X-Pac sacrificed himself so the powerhouse that is the nWo could overcome Bradshaw.

- Even with this Vince segment to foreshadow it, I still don't remotely understand the Flair and Austin feud.

- True, Flair will never be as financially secure as Vince McMahon.

- Also, what sense does it make to put Flair in a position of power and ignore him being in charge of WCW for a lengthy amount of time? That seems like it would make the whole thing make much more sense.

Trish Stratus vs. Jazz

- Random Molly Holly for no reason.

- Half hour in? Give it this, so far this show's pretty brisk at least. Though that's still with over two hours to go.

- Wouldn't this promo make more sense if Trish were the champion?

- Aw, Jazz didn't have her actual theme yet.

- Wow, Trish is not remotely selling the beating Molly gave her. Wouldn't it make more sense to have her hurt and being dominated instead of just effortlessly beating Jazz's ass?

- That was a better Batista Bomb than Batista's.

- And a better STF than Cena's too. Jazz kind of rules.

- That's twice tonight they've done ringside interviews.

Brock Lesnar vs. Jeff Hardy

- It doesn't sound right for Heyman to say, "Brock Lesnar," in a normal, human tone of voice.

- Brock clearly hadn't reached his final form yet if he's running from a chair.

- Lesnar's theme sounds super-generic here.

- And what's with that shot in his titantron of his back tattoo turning into snot?

- I'd kind of like to see a rematch of this nowadays. That'd probably be crazy fun if you made it no DQ.

- Not as many as you'd think, JR.

- I know Jeff brought the chair in the ring but it still seems like an F-5 on the chair should be a DQ.

- Also, fastest recovery from an F-5 ever.

Edge vs. Kurt Angle

- It feels like they should probably bring up Edge beating Angle to win the King of the Ring as part of this video package, it seems relevant.

- Why did Jericho join in there on beating Edge up? They didn't even mention it.

- Well, judging by that shirt Edge more dresses like he's in a bowling tournament but maybe that's his rock band's gimmick.

- "You suck! You suck!" There, now that theme sounds right.

- It still kind of weirds me out that they bothered to keep the rights for Never Gonna Stop. Not complaining though, that theme rules.

- Not much to say on this one to this point but it's very fast-paced and a lot of fun.

- With German suplexes like that it's no wonder Edge was out with a neck injury less than a year later.

- And with how sloppy that one on Angle was, it's no wonder he was also out with a neck injury a year later.

- This match seriously rules. It's just a nonstop flurry of them beating the hell out of each other with basically no slow points.

- That's the second match in a row with someone going for a chair out of frustration. Seems really out of place in this one given when Edge takes Angle by surprise because of it it doesn't cost him the match.

- Best counter to the spear ever.

- Honestly between that and the fact that the opener was pretty good I'm kind of re-evaluating my opinion of this show already. I know it's going to get worse for the big two matches but still, this match was well worth seeing.

- I miss the WWF Live bumpers. Why don't they still do those?

- What was the thought process behind leaving Jericho off the card a month after main eventing Mania?

- Rahshinulise?

- This promo is pretty hilariously similar to that Joey Styles one.

- Well, that's a good way to bury Trish, Kidman, and Maven.

- Was this whole thing supposed to be setting up a Hogan / Jericho feud? Because it didn't happen.

- I love that Jericho's delusional heel ramblings about Hogan being washed up and not being a worthy champion pretty much wound up being proven completely correct.

- "I don't have a match and I have no reason to be here, so I'm leaving!" That promo serve a point besides to set up him showing up later for the main event?

- Why did Taker come to Flair's office entirely to hold up a finger and leave without a word? It wasn't even the middle one.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rob Van Dam

- Eddie's hair looks awful here.

- Ha, yes, the D'Lo Brown line. Still love that.

- Yeah, I'm really distracted by Eddie's hair here. It's just hideous.

- Pretty early in the match for the leg drop on the barricade.

- This match is really one-sided.

- Jesus, that powerbomb looked ugly. That hit so hard Eddie launched in the air from it and he's the one that did it.

- And yet another match where a weapon gets brought into the ring despite it not being no-DQ.

- And that's the story of how the Intercontinental title wound up on the one Ring of Honor DVD I own.

- Ebert gave the Scorpion King four stars?!

Undertaker vs. Steve Austin

- Well, if Taker would have to pull a Mania moment on Flair to get a title shot he'd have to wait another year for it.

- The hell did Scott Hall do to deserve a chance for a title shot?

- What was even the point of the matches to qualify for the title shot anyway? It's not like Austin and Taker didn't both have a legitimate claim to it, RVD was in a feud already, and Hall... Yeah.

- Why did Austin stun Flair anyway, besides just to set up their pointless feud?

- Red boots with a ref shirt and black pants. That clashes quite a bit.

- Wait, Taker was still using Rollin' at this point? Could've sworn he'd switched to that instrumental theme. Speaking of, man, that thing was shortlived, huh?

- Why was Austin walking around with his vest half on?

- I don't know that I've heard a, "Fight! Fight! Fight!" chant on a wrestling show very often but seems like it'd come up a lot.

- Nope, this isn't exactly the quality of their match four years prior.

- The best pure striker in the WWE's throwing some really awful-looking punches here.

- Really not hard to see why this match is so dull at least. Taker was pretty mcuh at one of his lowest points as a performer and Austin probably just plain didn't care given he walked out a few weeks later.

- Do I really need to say much here? It's just a bunch of pointless brawling. It's not a train wreck, like say Rock / Taker from King of the Ring 1999 (I seriously pray I don't get that shit show, watched it a few months ago as it is so I wouldn't even have much to say about it), it's just dull.

- X-Pac is still wearing that mask.

- Uh, obviously the nWo's there because Austin's the one who beat Hall to get this title shot and they were already feuding. Deductive reasoning JR.

- Give them this, the crowd's hot for this match somehow.

- Though I don't remember What chants during the mudhole stomping being a thing.

- And yet another trip for a chair. That's the third of the night, fourth if you count Eddie going for the belt.

- Well, duh, of course Austin wanted three. Why wouldn't he?

- Yeah, that's enough to knock out Ric f***ing Flair.

- At least this time the chair actually got used I guess.

- So can Flair just not see the distorted-looking chair lying in plain sight behind him that he'd thrown out of the ring a minute prior?

- Seriously, what is with the chair thing? Does no one on this show know what a DQ is?

- Now Austin's got it. Everyone on this show is an idiot.

- A big boot into a chair is enough for a three count on Steve goddamn Austin? Whatever, the match is over.

- Convenient that TV just happened to be playing that.

- So, if Flair's part-owner why can't he just make a rematch on the spot or something?

Billy & Chuck vs. Maven & Al Snow

- YOOOOOOOU LOOK SOOOOOO GOOD TO MEEEEEEEE!

- Wow, Al Snow and Maven completely kill the crowd dead on their entrance.

- A, "Rico's gay!" chant. Stay classy, 2002.

- This match is really weird and hard to follow. It seems like pretty much nobody's in the right spot at the right time.

- Nowadays that kick'd get you DQed judging by Raw. For now though, it's enough to retain the titles. At least it was short and I get to hear Billy & Chuck's theme again.

Hulk Hogan vs. Triple H

- I still say that Vince promo was a shoot.

- And within about a week people decided that no, they didn't want Hogan as champion after all.

- Even at this point in time Hogan was mentioning Andre in every single promo of his apparently.

- Why did they show clips of the wedding vow renewal bet ween Triple H and Stephanie? That had nothing to do with anything besides to set up Jericho interfering later.

- No, no, no, putting on the real Voodoo Child, gimme a sec.

- I haven't remarked on it all night but the Backlash blades are awesome and I miss them.

- Or he can just get lucky after a bunch of run-ins, that'd do the trick too.

- There, time to play the game, so I'll keep that tab open until Hogan's champion.

- So great a champion he couldn't get a match at Backlash.

- April Twenty Sehfirst.

- Yeah, Hogan wouldn't be willing to give up until a couple of months later.

- It seems like it was probably really obvious that Hogan was winning this - I wasn't really watching in the few weeks around this point - given how much they're talking on and on about how he's trying to prove he can do it one more time, plus with all the momentum he had coming out of Mania.

- Speaking of Diamond Cutters, man, there are a lot of people who were on the Mania card who are MIA here, huh? Him, Christian, Booker, Rock...

- That's not ironic, JR.

- How much the crowd is booing Triple H here? Yeah, that sort of thing is why they dropped the whole thing of him as the top face as fast as they did.

- This is honestly probably more boring than Austin / Taker is. At least the crowd was pretty reasonably invested in that one, they're pretty quiet for most of this one.

- Though credit where it's due to Triple H for knowing to adjust to working more heel to try to give the crowd someone to root for.

- What exactly is modified about that speeler? It's standard, Triple H is just lying down while doing it.

- ADRENALINE RUSH, ADRENALINE RUSH.

- So to set up Jericho / Triple H in the Cell, Jericho runs out to try to help Triple H retain the title. Makes sense to me.

- And even when he's doing a run-in Jericho still gets stomped by Triple H.

- Then there's Taker interfering to help Hogan, though at least that one, y'know, actually wound up making sense and did lead to a Triple H / Taker match. Which was awful.

- That's a pretty awesome shot of Taker grinning while walking away.

- Hogan was also the last WWF Champion, which is pretty damn appropriate honestly.

- It's okay, Trips, you'll get your win back on SmackDown anyway.


Very hit and miss show. A lot of it's pretty good, with the bad stuff short, but Austin / Taker and Hogan / Triple H together take up probably an hour of the show counting recaps and entrances, and both are just terrible. There are worse shows and Angle / Edge is well worth seeing but it wouldn't be my first choice. Still, if you're curious to see how it is, it wouldn't hurt to check it out.

Well, let's see if the next show also winds up being something I've tempted fate on before. And it shall be. . . Fall Brawl 1994. Well, if nothing else, I'll be getting my first ever taste of Wargames though given who's in it it'll probably not be a good one to start off with. What's with all the 1994 WCW I'm getting?

[Deleted]

Fall Brawl 1994

- My mistake, I've apparently turned on a Sega CD game.

- The entire roster proceeded to vanish.

- Just my luck that my first War Games match would have the f***ing Nasty Boys in it.

- What is it with me getting shows with patriotic song performances at the start of them lately?

- So why's Heenan have a neckbrace on?

- I'm guessing it won't be a very interesting even.

Johnny B. Badd vs. Steven Regal

- Johnny B. Badd's music always makes me think Cool Cocky Bad's been dubbed in.

- Gee, given I just watched a show like three PPVs later with Mero defending the TV title I wonder who wins.

- Well, that wig doesn't look stupid at all.

- The. . . double. . . hook. . .

- I don't know what that Michael Jackson joke means.

- Holding up a miniature flag isn't quite as imposing as Rusev's giant one.

- Don't. . . don't do a sweeping shot at just the right angle to show that one side of the arena is completely empty.

- This is actually a pretty good match for what it's worth. Crowd's pretty into it too. Pretty refressing seeing a Regal TV title match where he's not just stalling trying to run the time out.

- Granted, that didn't work out very well for him.

- Buffering!

- I love that as they're playing footage of Hogan getting Kerriganned you can hear the crowd popping for it before they cut their mics.

- Well, this is a lengthy, poiintless series of recaps for someone not even on the show.

- I wonder who that Masked Man wound up being.

- No, it wasn't Flair's plan, it's much dumber than that.

Cactus Jack vs. Kevin Sullivan

- I wonder which of the two had to leave the company after this!

- I don't really have anything to say here, just that it's dull.

- How did Sullivan wind up going from vaguely face to the Taskmaster within a couple of months anyway? Besides the fact that he's a creepy-looking bastard, though less in a cult leader way and more in a seedy bar rapist way.

- How the hell did that put Cactus Jack down? He apparently knocked himself out forearming a chair.

- Greatest thing that ever happened to Foley, losing this.

- Bunkhouse Buck looks like he tried to find a way to have Vader's mask as a haircut and succeeded.

- I don't think you're going to get the chance to face the Full Blooded Italians, Terry.

- There's something to be said when Arn Anderson is the least redneck, most coherent member of a group. Not counting Meng's indecipherable screaming.

Ricky Steamboat vs. Steve Austin

- You know how this one went.

- Uh, I'd rethink that S.S. Austin namebar.

- Why does Steamboat get a full-on Titantron video but Austin just got a logo?

- Wound up being about fifteen years.

- Austin does a great job of coming off as completely thrilled over being handed the title given what's coming.

- I love Austin's mockery of Steamboat here.

- Okay, I can make peace with blond Austin easily, but his most Stone Cold voice possible coming out of that Austin is bizarre. Especially with him being pretty profane for 1994 WCW.

Steve Austin vs. Jim Duggan

- I wonder who's winning this given Starrcade.

- And thus ends the greatest US title reign ever.

- "The shortest title reign in the history of our sport!"

- This promo has already lasted longer than Austin's title reign.

- Fun, even a promo about Duggan being US Champion winds up being about Hogan on a PPV where he doesn't have a match.

Stars & Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

- "And we've got a fan leaving! Thank goodness!"

- Give Orndorff this, that is a pretty sweet bathrobe.

- Man, this entrance is just dragging on and on.

- Give them this, though are some pretty neat mirrored tights on Patriobuff. They look a lot more coordinated than the champions whose only similarities are their first names and their sunglasses.

- The heel raising his arms having his coat taken off of him loses its effect if his tag partner does it then he does it for him.

- Oh, turns out they have matching trunks. So just the entrance gear clashes terribly.

- "Is that a midget or a kid?"

- HE'S TWERKIN' MAGGLE.

- Seriously, what was WCW's fascination with Buff's middle name?

- How do you botch a dropkick that badly?

- Uh, no, the boos are probably for Roma for his ridiculous prancing around the ring. Speaking of, it is sad when Paul Roma is by far showing the most charisma and personality in a match.

- Well, that's a weak ending.

- That's a pretty loose idea of what constitutes a piledriver.

- My backstage pass is now available!!!

- That Nasty Dream shirt is the most horrifying thing I've seen today besides the guy wearing it. Seriously, Dusty looks like a corpse here.

- Get ready to eat Kate?

- Well, the best of these four is the one who's still around twenty years later, there's that.

Vader vs. Sting vs. Guardian Angel

- To get around Heenan constantly calling him Bossman, he's become a beatnik.

- Still from Cobb County at least.

- Kudos on having a hometown less specific than Bossman's.

- I don't care what anybody says, Man Called Sting is an awesome theme.

- Wait, wait, all three men flip a coin and the odd man out comes in later. That's pretty damn ineffecient, what if they all get the same side?

- "When I get done whippin' his butt, you're next!" Come on, Austin used, "ass," earlier.

- What's the point of a time limit if there's an overtime followed by sudden death and there must be a winner?

- Yeah, Heenan's still repeatedly calling him the Bossman. Just did so like four times in one sentence.

- Yes, pacing themselves is why a Vader / Bossman match would be slow.

- Yeah, Bossman is too big for Vader to lift. I know he was a big guy but bullshit.

- And there goes the mask. Also I guess the top rope thing isn't a DQ if both guys go over at the same time?

- Well, obviously that wouldn't have been a three anyway since Vader immediately got back up.

- Why on earth didn't Sting just stay at ringside?

- Yeah, the number one contender until Flair and Beefcake just get given title shots ahead of them anyway.

- Wait, Vader put the mask back on. Why?

- Somebody wipe the sweat off the camera lens please.

- Never jump again after the Vader Bomb! It never works!

- I guess to be fair this time he didn't even get the chance to miss the jump.

- And he gets to miss one a minute later anyway.

- Seriously, never jump on the ass slam counter for a sunset flip.

- Give him this, back in the day Sting was crazy strong.

- They really liked going to that, "Sting can't do the Scorpion Death Lock on fat guys!" well a lot, huh?

- I just now noticed but at some point Vader lost the mask again.

- "He's gotta foot on there!"

- Again, with a guaranteed overtime, what's the point of a fifteen minute time limit? Just have a twenty minute one.

- That was the worst count there.

- The time running out didn't even interrupt a fall, besides Sting should've been DQed for how long he kept the hold on while Vader had the ropes. That's the only reason to even have something like that, just to screw Sting over with the interruption.

- Sting basically doesn't have any face paint left at this point.

- Oh, strike that, he has some mascara around one eye.

- As opposed to people dressing up in silly clothes and beating each other up.

- I swear he just said thirty minutes.

- How on earth did Vader in the span of like three months go from having a straight half hour at a largely fast pace across two opponents to being as out of it as he was against Duggan, anyway?

- Yeah, Vader, what did yo uexpect to happen climbing to the top while he was standing?

- And the heel's the one who gets screwed by the time running out. They really don't get how to lay these things out.

- Why is Sting crawling to the other ring?

- How does that not count as being knocked off his feet exactly?

- Wow, never seen a crowd go so insane over a guy being knocked off his feet.

- So why did Beefcake cost Sting the match? They ever explain that or just clumsy set-up for that Avalanche match?

- Wait, Vader wins because the referee raised his hand? I think they said that backwards.

- You know, the crowd heat does a lot to cover for it, but it's still really stupid booking to have Vader have a full match, win, have Sting beaten clean and get screwed only by the clock running out, then try to play it up as an injustice when he wins in sudden death. Still an awesome match though.

- I know War Games tends to last awhile but still, this promo's going to last an eternity, isn't it?

- Do we really need this extended shot designed to draw attention straight to Hogan's crotch?

- How the hell is Hogan calling Flair on the phone causing a video of him to appear?

- That is the weakest party ever. Flair's sitting there looking like he's asleep and the only other people around are like three or four bored-looking women who aren't doing anything but toasting each other.

- Wait, wait, Hogan admits that he said he gave up while in the Figure Four, but thinks it doesn't count because he changed his mind afterward?

- Well, I'll give them this, Flair does genuinely sound like he's drunk.

- At least they're not playing it like the girls can hear Hogan. Still absurdly stupid.

- Wait, Hogan's acting like his knee being fine is a secret to not tell Flair about while he's talking about it on live national television?!

- That sounded more like Hogan thinks about f***ing him.

- Wait, wait, saying you'll go along with something on national TV is a binding contract requiring no paper work?

- This is the longest section ever in one of these things. Maybe I should go back and separate the Vader matches. Or not, screw it.

- Bockwinkel has the authority to bar Hogan from wrestling for any promotion in the world?

- The googly-eyed horror there from Mean Gene is like Bockwinkel just let it slip he'd raped his mom or something.

- WHAT ARE YOU SMOKIN'?!

- Seriously, steel cage matches piss Mean Gene right the hell off.

The Nasty Boys & Dusty and Dustin Rhodes vs. Terry Funk, Arn Anderson, Bunkhouse Buck, Col. Robert Parker

- Mean Gene is also really, really thrilled over Meng being pulled from the match.

- "Get hurt permanent."

- Why was Arn Anderson dressed like a preacher?

- Meng's going to watch. That's all Meng's going to do.

- YUH PAWNUH!

- I know he said, "Outta shape," but in Dusty Speak that sounded like, "Old as shit."

- BAAAAAAD BUTTS.

- So, Dusty advises Dustin against recruiting random people they can't trust, and he immediately goes to two people who respond to the implication he's tougher than they are by beating the shit out of people hanging around.

- Wall Games.

- Do they really need to explain what happens in every period? Just say they alternate sending people in, people can follow that.

- The referee's in charge? No shit?

- They come out to Dustin's terrible theme?

- And he really couldn't put on a Nasty Boys shirt for this? Even Dusty did but the team captain just looks completely out of place.

- Hopefully this guy's better than the last Bunkhouse I saw.

- Somehow I don't think that was actually a full two minutes.

- Dusty's a real loving father, sending one of the Nasty Boys to assist Dustin with the whole being murdered thing instead of going in himself.

- That has to be a record for the fastest somebody's botched during a match.

- This match matters so much they're talking about the next PPV's main event instead.

- This match is really boring. And for a giant cage match built around surrender with the Nasty Boys, a guy in suspencers and jeans, and Terry Funk there is a serious lack of blood.

- So what exactly is stopping Meng from going in anyway?

- At least Parker's complete horror at being part of this is pretty entertaining, there's that.

- A gimmick match is being talked up as being Dusty's specialty? Shocking.

- Of course all of the heels rush Dusty and he effortlessly beats all their asses.

- Uh, Meng, if you want in, pull on the door, no t the wall.

- Climbing to the top isn't going to help either.

- At least Meng didn't sell that stupid tackling someone off the cage spot.

- It takes Parker an absurdly long period of time to give up. And of course Dusty gets the fall.

- Really, they have to announce him as legendary just in saying that he won?

- Okay, Meng headbutting the camera was pretty funny.

- Why does every WCW PPV from this era have a ton of stalling at the end before cutting to random promos and announce speeches?

- Mean Gene is still pissed over the existence of cage matches.

- Flair just agreed to the match tonight and he's already on board with a press conference the next day?

- If they don't get a camera back there to record it now, they'll show you the tape of it on Saturday. Will they just cast black magic for it? Does Meng have his own personal cameraman who will loan them the tape?

- The rest of this is just recaps apparently, so I'm just going to go ahead and turn it off, only missing out on like a minute and a half anyway.


I'll be nice and not judge War Games as a whole by that match, because that sucked and with that line-up there was little chance that it wasn't going to. Outside of that... Meh. It's not really a great show, but the Austin thing is the only real offense to it. The opener and Sting / Vader are well worth seeing if anything, though the latter's ending is completely moronic and was pretty much just an excuse for them to segue into talking more about Hogan's angle at the end of the show.

Wonder if my next one will be another first for me seeing a type of gimmick match (well, I've seen Lethal Lockdown anyway so not all that much of a first). Doubt it, but maybe it'll be the first time I cover one at least. And it will be. . . Wrestle War 1992. Well, that second taste of War Games won't take long.

Also, somebody find me a video of Mean Gene's tantrum over the cage match being announced. Seriously, that is amazing and people need to behold it.

Additionally! I will also this evening be doing the 1988 Royal Rumble match. Every four days (ish, I'll make up the difference where needed) I'll be doing a Rumble match building up to this year's.

[Deleted]

WrestleWar 1992

- This show's going to be hard to type stuff up for because at this point I have a hard time capitalizing the word War without first typing it as WaR. Speaking of, you should all go read that, link's in my signature.

- This is going to be intense, the logo's shaking!

- Bischoff looks like an extra on Saved By the Bell.

Greg Valentine & Taylor Made Man vs. The Fabulous Freebirds

- Taylor Made Man. That is what they're calling Terry Taylor. Yeah.

- Also, was there ever a point in time in whci hGreg Valentine was in shape? Ever?

- Does his ass say The Rammer on it? I'm pretty damn sure that's an R, not an H.

- Oh, the point in time when a DDT could be called a high-impact move.

- Taylor looks a whole lot like Mongo tonight.

- Yay, first match in and they're doing a little bit in the way of integrating the other ring into the match. Not a lot but at least it's present.

- Fivearm?

- Yeah, there is no way that's an H, his ass is named The Rammer.

- It's hard to take someone as a threat when they keep being called Jimmy Jam.

- That was a really fast count.

- WOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

- Their theme is really obviously ripped off of Born to Boogie.

Tracy Smothers vs. Johnny B. Badd

- Given how much they talked up the TV title win as his first major success, guessing that attempt to jump to the next level coming off of this match didn't go too well.

- It's not the same Johnny B. Badd experience with a different theme song.

- That might be the greatest cape of all time though.

- That was actually a pretty good reply from Ventura on the boa subject.

- I'm guessing this early incarnation is why Johnny B. Badd was inducted into WrestleCrap. Seeing his later stuff I've been meaning to rant about that.

- Talking about the explosiveness of Mero's jumping as he's in the middle of using an armbar.

- Well, it was more around the ear, but I'll count it, still a very crisp dropkick.

- I didn't notice earlier but that DQ in the opening match was incredibly sloppy.

- That's not ironic.

Marcus Alexander Bagwell vs. Scotty Flamingo

- I'm just calling them Buff and Raven.

- Raven here looks like Adam Rose if he didn't have any friends.

- Is Jesse saying he wants to f*** Buff and Raven? That's what that sounded like.

- This is a really plain match. Not a bad one even, just very basic.

- Ha, they used that flexing arm wave more than one year?

Junkyard Dog & Ron Simmons vs. Mr. Hughes & Cactus Jack

- So why are they setting up this match showing a segment with Abdullah when he's not in the match?

- Yeah, Cactus Jack having a bodyguard in a suit. That's appropriate.

- See, Ventura even brings up how weird that is.

- What was the plan there, hope Team Black Guys in Bright-Colored Tights would just figure Foley wasn't coming back?

- "RON SIMMONS! RON SIMMONS!"

- I'm just going to go ahead and say now, this is an incredibly boring show. Not even like all of the matches have been bad or anything, it's just there is absolutely nothing that feels like you should care about it. Not even in retrospect, just this whole thing feels like you're watching a show full of filler that was sold entirely on its main event.

- Why is this a one-on-one match? Shouldn't it be a handicap one? What you'd think but Cactus is standing outside the ring and any time he starts leaning in the ref waves him off.

- Even Ventura's pointing that out.

- As well as all of the other logistical flaws in this match. Really he's pretty much doing my job for me here, which is good since this match is dull and I can't feel bothered to put that much thought into it.

- Well, screw JYD I guess, Simmons laid them both out easily anyway.

Super Invader vs. Todd Champion

- WCW SPECIAL FORCES.

- This crowd has been just kinda-sorta into things all night but they are completely dead for Todd Champion.

- Super Invader looks like the most generic indy jobber who ever lived. Also, is he face or heel? They're talking about him like he's face.

- Was that an ABBA reference from JR?

- JR and Jesse are so bored they're debating the pros and cons of wrestling in a mask instead of talking about the match.

- Wow, they're announcing the entire card for the next PPV on the Saturday after the one before it? WWE could learn from that.

- That was a terrible powerbomb.

- Seriously, they're talking up that guy as a potential Vader tag partner?

- Stop talking about War Games, I just want to get to it.

Richard Morton vs. Big Josh

- I'd question about how seriously you're supposed to take the idea of Ricky Morton as a cocky heel, but he's fighting Doink with an axe so probably not much so.

- Wait, yeah, shit, I didn't notice Fonzie was the ref. Well done, the referee is the most interesting part of the match.

- Shirts rip easier if they're dirty, says Ventura.

- Well, that was short. Okay match but really not long enough to have much of anything of note. Like I guessed, the referee was the most interesting part.

Flyin' Brian vs. Z-Man

- Oh, thank God, I needed a match like this. I'm sure these two will deliver.

- Zenk's big complaint is that Pillman's helping him too much since winning the Light Heavyweight title?

- That weird mid-air Ring Around the Rosie thing was weird, but it looked cool and it's the most exciting thing to happen on this show so far.

- This match has a lot of football talk.

- I love how mystified Ventura is over the nose tackle thing. He just keeps going on and on about it.

- That was some weird camera work. It made it look pretty slapstick.

- I disagree, JR, I'd rather this not be a triple threat with Paul Heyman.

- Was that an accidental Codebreaker?

- Fun stuff. Wish it was longer but this show really needed that.

- You're right, it's not safe! Beach Blast has that match rendered pointless by Raven starting a two-week title run!

Tatsuki Fujinami & Takayuji Iizuka vs. The Steiner Brothers

- I like JR's response to Jesse going in a political direction with his ranting.

- Scotty Steiner doesn't sound right.

- The youngest of two.

- I don't think I've ever seen the fallaway slam version of the Canadian Destroyer.

- Is it insulting or praising for Jesse to say Iizuka's in better shape than most Japanese wrestlers?

- Why is this show so back-loaded anyway? Had they put this and the last match at earlier points in the show instead of back-to-back right before War Games I'd probably give this show much more of a pass than I'm going to.

- Seriously, stop calling him Scotty. He hadn't become Big Poppa Pump yet but he's still clearly a roid beast even at this point in time.

- Has Rick been in the ring at all? Kind of a weird match, it's pretty much exclusively been one-on-one so far.

- Nice bit of a story there, goading Rick in as a means to double-team Scott.

- Have to love that these two are being booed for no other reason beyond being Japanese. They're talking like this is their debut and they're largely working clean, and the Steiners have been the ones dominating for most of it.

- Steinerline? Shouldn't there be, y'know, some sort of pun there? Not quite the Frankensteiner, that.

- Well, that was a nasty German. At least they kind of worked the botch into the story of the match.

- I'm not sure how that dropkick didn't hurt Fujinami, but it looked cool so whatever.

- That's really Fujinami's fault for losing that. He easily could have broken that pin up.

Sting's Squadron vs. The Dangerous Alliance

- Is there something in Bischoff's mouth? He sounds like he just had a tooth pulled or something.

- What's the deal with that siren?

- What are the five most exciting words in WCW? That was a lot more than five.

- Oh, "Let the War Games begin!" Meh, I'm not too excited. At least at this point, if it'd come after the rest of this show without those last two matches I'd be f***ing thrilled.

- And again they're explaining the period thing one by one instead of just saying they alternate.

- It seems like it'd distract from the psychology of it a bit to wait to flip the coin during the match. Cuts the idea of a heel trying to kill time until his teammate comes in to give him an advantage, because the heels always win the coin toss.

- There, now they said it alternates.

- The group walking out one by one in a single file line does look pretty badass. Though Heyman should be at the back.

- Seems a little weird to wait to discuss strategy at ringside, but that is nitpicking so meh.

- People were invoking Jim Jones to talk about Heyman before ECW, apparently.

- Austin's trunks here are pretty spectacular. They look like a kindergarten bulletin board.

- You don't see someone actually actively resisting being slammed into a cage very often, cool touch.

- Neat clothesline.

- We're not five minutes in and this is already far more bloody than the last War Games match I watched.

- Holy shit, the heels won the coin toss! I can't believe it!

- Bloody blond Austin with his hair flying everywhere looks a lot like Billy Gunn.

- Unnecessary rolling, yay! Austin is the man here.

- Arn's beating everybody's ass.

- Double half crab. That's pretty cool.

- Does it count that Steamboat was tapping out when that wasn't a thing yet?

- It feels like it should have longer than two minute periods. Very fun stuff but it feels like as soon as one side gets the advantage the other evens it up, it could use an extra minute to milk it.

- What are you doing, Dustin?! That's your potential future Silverdust!

- Seriously, Austin is taking an amazing asskicking in this match.

- So why couldn't Medusa just do that on the ground, put it through one of the holes?

- Was Sting going to throw her off? I like the idea Sting was going to Mankind her if she hadn't climbed down.

- I kind of want to go back and look at the entrances again, not going to but it feels like the Dangerous Alliance entered in the order they walked out. Not 100% on that.

- Dustin really badly botched that big boot.

- Man, I've needed a good bloodbath like this for awhile.

- Koloff CRUSH.

- I really like that shoving spot there, really does a lot to show Koloff's changed ways. Very quick, effective storytelling that makes their hug a minute late feel deserved even without having seen the build to it.

- Austin, Dustin, and Arn's faces are all just slabs of raw meat at this point.

- Seems a little more fitting to have ended in the Scorpion Death lock, but armbar's still well done.


The Royal Rumble match for 1988 will come in a little bit, just wanted to get this up now given the delay. Largely a boring show that's really hard to sit through, but holy shit the show takes a huge step up in quality toward the end. If nothing else, you should without a doubt track down the main event, really great match, and the two before it wouldn't hurt to watch either.

Next up, we've got... Well, next up is the 1988 Royal Rumble, but besides that, we have... Great American Bash 2007. The only thing I remember from this show is Cena / Lashley and I've not seen it so that should be something.

[cabbageboy]

WrestleWar 1992 is a really good PPV. The marginal stuff isn't all that horrible or anything and the 2nd half of the PPV is some of the best stuff WCW ever did. Wargames here is probably the best one ever and is one of WCW's best matches of the 90s. WCW's 1992 output as a whole is criminally underrated.

[Jiren]

I'm going through WCW from start (Curse no WCW Saturday night or Misc as some important stuff happens there somtimes) PPV/Clash and I'm just about to start HH92, So far it's been very good.

On topic though Wrestlewar 92 is a very good show

[Deleted]

Yeah, the second half of that show is killer. I think it'd be a better show had they spaced the tag match and Pillman / Zenk out a bit and put one toward the start and one in the middle, but either way it's three damn good matches worth seeing and the rest of the show while not really anything special is far from the worst thing I've ever seen.

GAB 2007 will come in a few hours, but for now...


1988 Royal Rumble Match

- They really need a better search function on the 360, I had to open up the video on the site and poke around for the start point for the Rumble then fast-forward to that on the 360.

- Pretty weird to have Bret and Tito not have actual entrances, but that's a TV special for ya I guess.

- Has anyone ever been called, "The Natural," and not just had a complete lack of a gimmick? It just seems like an excuse to give somebody an alias when they don't give you anything more interesting to work with.

- I'm already being reminded of one of the big issues I had with this match when I first saw iat the start of the year, where the whole thing is just divided into face vs. heel mechanics and it never really fills like a free-for-all.

- And there's the start of the third entrance curse.

- Harley Race is in really terrible shape here.

- Yeah, again here, the whole time they just keep staggering it face / heel / face / heel in the entrances and constantly talking about how one side has the advantage. The whole thing feels more like some kind of team battle royal challenge thing as opposed to a free-for-all.

- The second Davis put those tights on he should've known his career was over.

- I love how they make a huge deal out of how Bret's been in there through a whopping nine entrants.

- This is giving me less worth commenting on than I was expecting. I've already pretty mch summed up my thoughts on it.

- Give this one this at least, they take their time on the eliminations in the early part of it.

- "Ain't" isn't a double-negative.

- Kind of funny how they're rarely calling him Muraco and just keep calling him Rock.

- I wish he was fat so I could do a, "More like Pillsbury Jim!" joke.

- I'm always really torn on how invested Vince sounds in people's well-being and such. It sounds really dorky and lame, but it has a charm to it, y'know?

- I like how 1988 era Warrior just looks like a random jobber who gets tossed very quickly.

- "Why are they picking on Jake?" Because he's been in there longer than anyone else at this point, keep up.

- Yeah, that's why if you're holding a guy for a move in the Royal Rumble, you don't back up to the ropes first.

- So, if they had done the title shot thing back when, would Duggan have been awarded the title after it was vacated or would the winner of the tournament have faced him for it or what?

[Deleted]

Yeah, long and short of it, it's sometimes hard to find three hours straight to devote to taking notes on a wrestling show.

Great American Bash 2007

- Really, the match they open up the hype with is Khali / Batista / Kane? Really?

- F*** that, Lashley, Super Crazy is the one who deserved the title shot.

- So great an American tradition they only did it one more year, then a couple of years later had it as a random SmackDown special.

- Shut the hell up, JBL. Sorry, habit.

Matt Hardy vs. MVP

- Weird hearing Cole call MVP by his full name.

- Oh, shit, he beat Kenny Dykstra, MVP's in trouble!

- I would makr out so much for I'm Comin' to hit on Raw some week, not going to lie. Especially if they somehow had the tunnel set up first with nobody noticing.

- He will, it'll just take a year.

- It's early in but these two seem to have really good chemistry.

- I would seriously like to know what on earth happened to JBL in the past seven years to make him the shrill moron he is now.

- Watching this live you had to for sure know MVP was winning at this point when Matt just keeps getting one near fall after another just over and over again.

- Do like that after that whole match of building up the kick as being this big thing where if MVP hits it, it's over, and then it does indeed pretty much mark the end of the match when he finally does get it. Good story there.

- Why did this feud continue, anyway? Wound up being a good storyline but even if MVP won in a fluky way, he still won clean.

- Oh yeah, this was the night with the Orton / Dusty match. Right.

- Why does Dusty have tape on his knee over his jeans? What would that help?

- Dusty thinks cows look perty.

- So, if Orton crosses Dusty, he will moo at him? What the hell was that promo?

Cruiserweight Open

- Jimmy Wang Yang's minitron is really distracting.

- Better than Shannon Moore who doesn't have one. Also, why is his titantron showing him with facepaint and stuff but he's not actually wearing it?

- Even Funaki has a minitron, but Shannon Moore doesn't.

- And Jamie Noble, even if it does say He Pit Bu.

- Look at that minitron, Havo's coming! And thus, we start a great tradition of Hornswoggle beating Chavo.

- Why did they mention Hornswoggle was hanging around from the get-go? Knowing he's there you'd know from the word go that he's the one winning it.

- Your wife is Latina.

- Not really that much to say about this one to this point, fun but a pretty standard spotfest.

- It's really weird Jimmy Wang Yang never got a push, over as hell here and he was always a ton of fun.

- How did that hurt Noble?

- I like how Hornswoggle and JBL are apparently buddies (pre-cage match) but he doesn't like Cole.

- Man, they're working hard to make Cena / Lashley seem like a huge deal. Kind of funny given how Lashley was functionally gone from the company the next day.

- It's actually a pretty bizarre video package to run, it drives the point home of what a big conquest it would be so much that it comes off like Lashley should win as the Mania 12ish payoff, but since he was injured they couldn't do it.

- Yeah, that'll never happen.

The Sandman vs. Carlito

- Do you remember this feud? I sure as hell don't.

- Seriously, why did they never use Quien Soy Yo?

- Carlito's one of only like twenty people to hold both the Intercontinental and US titles. That's barely special at all when there are that many but JR says it is.

- Why is that pole so high up? It's to the point you'd probably have to jump from the top rope to reach it.

- Shocker, a Sandman / Carlito cane on a pole match is boring and I'm going to forget about it as soon as it ends.

- Yeah, Sandman seriously had to jump to reach the cane.

- So, it's a pole match for a cane, Sandman gets it. . . Never gets the chance to use it as he is immediately hit with a Backstabber for three. Genius.

- Carlito doesn't even bother grabbing the thing and beating Sandman with it after the match. It goes completely unused.

- The strategy should be something like, "Dusty's old as shit and I'm challenging for the WWE title next month, I could win this in my sleep."

- WWE probably shouldn't have people talking about killing others a month after Benoit.

Melina vs. Candice Michelle

- Aw, no, "Moo-moo-move ya body" yet.

- That bi-illiterate joke was kind of amusing for how lame the joke was. Better than any of King's material these days.

- Uh, or more likely, Melina's jealous that she's no longer champion.

- See, King gets it.

- This actually is a decent match. Nothing spectacular but it's alright.

- That's the only time anyone will ever compare Candice Michelle to Ricky Steamboat.

- I notice a trend on this show of more elaborate-looking pins, like people also using their leg to hook the leg and such.

- Which sign is most astounding for somebody to have brought, "Chick Kick," "Candice Hard Work Pays Off" (no, there's no comma), or, "Good Golly Khali"?

- Too much lovin' hurt Mark Henry, you insensitive bitch!

- Nice of that cameraman to have had the camera aimed at the floor just so they could pan up Candice's body.

- Which is there porn music? Who put that in?

- Okay, this show took a nosedive just with this one segment. Jesus, this is stupid. Like, this is kind of offending me on a Carlito / Hornswoggle wall portal level.

- And it just keeps going!

- DAMN.

- What if I'm less hungry like the animal and more hungry like the wolf?

Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga

- I really need to download an Umaga CAW during that Free Gold thing on the 360 before that lapses. Dunno when they stop that so maybe I should go ahead and do it now.

- This has been pretty decent but it's giving me like nothing to say about it.

- No clue why the ref is acting like it's cheating to do a Banzai drop more than once. Is it just because he's using the ropes? It's not like they're involved in the attack in any way, he's just springing off of them.

- That's why you don't yell when you're charging somebody from behind.

- Actually is a pretty good story here, where Jeff is just throwing everything he's got at Umaga and working smart but he just plain can't stop him.

- Shades of Rikishi, or not.

- Cena's been the WWE Champion his entire life says JR.

- Do like the parallel of both of these videos showing when each guy first won the US title, and in the process when each of them beat JBL.

- Why was there a random shot of Cena about to FU Edge?

- Damn, Edge took that chairshot head-on.

John Morrison vs. CM Punk

- It's not even the ECW World Championship apparently, it's the ECW World Title.

- The Morrison experience just isn't the same without the slow-mo or the theme.

- God, no, don't replay that promo where Morrison changed his name.

- Have to love that they fully intended the thing of Morrison beating Punk more than once and constantly running him down and cheap-shotting him not to pay off in Punk winning the title until the drug bust forced their hand.

- Ew, Punk's wearing the plain kickpads tonight. Also a slightly less complex version of his usual trunks.

- Shades of Tully Blanchard.

- That was quite the monkey flip sell, wow.

- Why are they acting like Morrison's a rookie, anyway? He'd been in a prominent position for most of the last four years or so.

- I'd say how Morrison mounting Punk isn't PG, but they weren't PG yet.

- Uh, that was an enziguri, Joey.

- That's a really weak ending.

Dusty Rhodes vs. Randy Orton

- Cody's hair looked really greasy when he first debuted.

- If Dusty really wanted to win this he'd challenge him to a Bunkhouse Stampede match.

- So JR only wishes Michaels a happy birthday if he's healthy?

- And yet for some reason Orton couldn't actually beat RVD.

- Dusty doesn't get a minitron.

- Orton is seriously stalling at the prospect of being tied to Dusty Rhodes? In 2007?

- Kind of weird to have built this up as a violent brawl so much just for it to start out with comedy spots.

- Given how Orton saw that coming, why didn't he just step over the rope?

- So Dusty just decided to up and try to murder Orton mid-match. Alrighty.

- Why on earth is this so one-sided in Dusty's favor, anyway? They're working it to where he's only really managing the advantage due to better knowing how to use the rope but still.

- I'll take that to mind Orton's really big on exploitation movies.

- Well, at least once Orton got control he kept it and ended it quickly.

- What's with Cody's shirt? It looks quite strange but can't get a good look at it.

- Seems really backwards to build this up as a violent brawl in the making and just have it turn out to be a comedy match that was basically a quick squash. Not like you were going to get anything more with Dusty in there in 2007 but still.

- Apparently non-lethal snakes don't coil.

- Yeah, beating Dusty in 2007 is bigger than winning the World title or beating Taker about a year prior.

The Great Khali vs. Kane vs. Batista

- Why isn't King Kane more of a thing?

- The belt at this point in time didn't say Redger.

- What is with all of the time stuff in this?

- What claim did Batista have to the title besides the fact that he was already facing Khali at the show? Kane was the number one contender, why did he have to earn it again?

- Shocker, if you cause the number one contendership match to end in a draw, both guys face you. Heels are always surprised by this.

- Why is this getting a music video treatment? This match had like two weeks worth of build.

- Batista looks bulkier than usual here. Also looks kind of out of breath.

- I'll give it this, I'll never hear I Walk Alone without getting hyped up.

- Yeah, monkey butt ugly sounds about right, JBL.

- Khali's original theme. Remember when he used that for about a month during that Jinder Mahal storyline?

- Wow, Cole thought to bring up the Cruiserweight title match as an example of how the champion doesn't have to be pinned. That's kind of stunning with him.

- Yeah, it takes agility and flexibility to shove somebody.

- So, why are Khali's chokeslams being shrugged off in a match with Kane where it's his finisher?

- I'm guessing that Batista / Kane match wasn't actually great.

- Well, Kane can take solace in the fact he's the last of these three to win a World title.

- No, no, the main rule of the Triple Threat is Shane Douglas holds the title for an eternity.

- Hey, Khali held up the title right-side-up this time.

- Why did Kane need help to chokeslam Khali the first time only to do it alone the second time? And why did they play those clips back-to-back?

- It's okay, Batista will just keep trying until he pulls it off.

- When I picture a king who you need to bow before, I don't tend to see somebody spitting water into the air or exercising.

- Love that it goes out on him Pedigreeing Jericho.

- Wow, it's really convenient that Booker knew that they were about to run that video so he could come out right after it. And for that matter that he just so happened to present himself as an opponent for Triple H given he was already being advertised for the show.

- Yeah, Booker's carrying himself like somebody who left the company a month later.

- Why did they have Booker get his ass kicked by King on Raw that one time anyway?

- God, this storyline was so awful to sit through and this segment's similary absolutely painful.

- Why is JR selling Booker calling out King then backing out as if it was some disturbing event?

John Cena vs. Bobby Lashley

- They got in Austin to say Cena / Lashley is a dream match? Huh?

- So are we just ignoring that the PPV directly before this Lashley got a shot at Cena and lost?

- I'm kind of curious to see the crowd reaction to this given how the crowd didn't like either of them and they're treating it like a massive showdown for the ages. I don't remember them caring much about the build-up.

- They even recapped the Vengeance match and made it look like it happened on Raw! What the hell?

- You should list the Dominator four or five more times, he had a lot of moves called that.

- Well, the answer on the reaction Lashley gets is basically a straight-up Conway pop. Though that might be part be because of the new theme, it doesn't pick up at all once he actually walks out.

- Because Super Crazy got screwed.

- Unlike the next year when the ECW title was on SmackDown for a few days.

- Cena gets a pop, though not really that much of one and you can hear that it's pretty much all women. Not really any booing though.

- Did Cena just throw the hat toward the ramp?

- Oh, shit, the title's foreshadowing Miz's reign!

- It's really weird to see this. The two guys are selling this as a clash of titans and they've made a good job of playing it up as one all night, but the crowd just doesn't care that much.

- Nah, you just have to kick him in the shoulder when he goes for the spear, that'll beat him much faster.

- This match seems really one-sided in Cena's favor.

- Yeah, Lashley's the only person to ever get back to his feet immediately after the Five Knuckle Shuffle.

- Lashley stole Nikki Bella's finisher from the future!

- Crowd is getting more into it about now.

- Is the goal to get people to rally behind Lashley? They seem to mostly be popping for Cena's big spots but Lashley's the one who is completely getting his ass kicked and constantly having his momentum cut off.

- How did that pin continue? Lashley straight up got off of Cena for a second between the one and two.

- The hell was with that pin? Did Cena just want the most gay-looking pin he could think of short of if he'd done it like Edge at ONS 2006?


All in all, decent show. The one-two punch of the triple threat match and the Booker segment is really the only outright terrible part, and most of the other matches are pretty decent. The main event's pretty good in its own right, though it's really lopsided - it seems like they were trying for a huge war but instead Cena just absolutely destroyed him with Lashley's spear that only happened because Cena got cocky being really the only time he was ever in danger. Very strange match.

So yeah, wouldn't really recommend going out of the way to see this one but if you want to watch it it wouldn't hurt, and if you're watching through all of the Great American Bash shows, it'd probably look like a light at the end of the tunnel after the couple of shows before it. Next up, we've got. . . Insurrextion 2001. Crumpets and poppycock and such await.