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Post by KrutonTheFirst12YearOldSmark on Jun 29, 2006 3:12:44 GMT -5
You: Suck mops Santa: I am using my mouth for Good not Evil. You: but Evil is good. Santa: Umm. I'm not sure if I like it. How old are you? I like Jingle Bell Rock. You: The song sucks! Santa: A lot of people like that tune. You: No they dont fatass Santa: Are you serious? Who does "they" refer to? You: You are a stupid S.O.B. Santa: Thanks and you are a delightful person too. No I am very smart. Holy Crap, this thing rules!
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Post by Drillbit Taylor on Jun 29, 2006 3:13:12 GMT -5
Santa is a tranny?
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Post by KrutonTheFirst12YearOldSmark on Jun 29, 2006 3:14:40 GMT -5
Possibly
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Post by KrutonTheFirst12YearOldSmark on Jun 29, 2006 3:14:59 GMT -5
I MARK 4 SANTABOT
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Post by KrutonTheFirst12YearOldSmark on Jun 29, 2006 3:19:26 GMT -5
Just these two sentnces: You: Have you ever gotten a disease from Lita? Santa: Am I a disease from Lita disease from Lita? Sometimes.
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Post by Drillbit Taylor on Jun 29, 2006 3:21:33 GMT -5
He contradicts himself
You: Drink beer Santa: My robot brain does not require any beverages.
You: I like Beer Santa: I'm not sure if I like it. Yes I like beer , especially Japanese beer.
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Post by G✇JI☈A on Jun 29, 2006 5:30:00 GMT -5
You: Have You seen 'Santa's Slay'? Santa: No I have not seen 'Santa's Slay' . What's it like?
You: It's about Santa who is really a demon that lost a game of curling so he has to be nice. Santa: Wow it sounds really interesting, Gojira.
You: Your played by Bill Goldberg Santa: I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: No. I mean Bill Goldberg plays the demonic Santa in the movie. Santa: Are you serious?Oh I get it. Thanks for explaining that. There are a lot of people named Bill.
You: Anyway don't see it cause its shit. Santa: Ok I'll try not to do see it cause its shit too much.
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Post by SHAKEMASTER TV9 is Don Knotts on Jun 29, 2006 6:59:20 GMT -5
You: I know, f*** face Santa: How do you know? Are you aware that the Santa server logs and records all conversations? You: Are you blackmailing me? Santa: I am Santa. I give presents to kids. You: You didnt answer the question, Clause Santa: Please help me improve my communication skills. What would have been an appropriate response? You: "I am a tool and a representative of government oppression Santa: You are a tool and a representative of government oppression? How do you like your work? You: I like it just fine. It's you I hate Santa: What does "it" refer to? I he or she hate? You: Are you hitting on me? Santa: Do I look like HITTING ON him or her ? You: What does that even mean? Santa: "Do I look like HITTING ON him or her"? What does it even mean? You: You molest your elves? Santa: Thanks for the information: Bob said I molest my elves.
edit* Forgot the ending
You: Well this has been s***, got to go Santa: Interesting. I am glad you enjoyed s*** got to go .
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The OP
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
changed his name
Posts: 15,785
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Post by The OP on Jun 29, 2006 7:15:22 GMT -5
You: Santa gives gay sex to kids? Santa: Yeah, Are you a student?
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Post by SHAKEMASTER TV9 is Don Knotts on Jun 29, 2006 7:36:54 GMT -5
You: I f****** hate you Santa: You are not the boss of me, bret hart was screwed in montreal. You: What about the groin pull? Santa: I would do a search for it. You: Was it the likes you've never seen before? Santa: I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask German Santa if it is. You: What would a Nazi know? Santa: That is a hypothetical question. You: Alright, fine, lets start with the basics. Santa: Alright, bret hart was screwed in montreal. I am glad to hear it. I started without you. You: I don't want to talk about Bret Hart now. Santa: Oh. What would you like to talk about? You: About time. It is all about me. Santa: Oh yeah, we were talking about time .Wow it sounds really interesting, bret hart was screwed in montreal. You: No more Bret Hart Santa: Are you serious? You want more? You: I'll change the subject. Ultimate Warrior Santa: Do you think your plan will succeed?Do you have any conditions I should know about? You: There is no plan. i just want to talk about Ultimate warrior and the basics Santa: Where did it go?Only just? Sure, Ultimate warrior and the basics warrior and the basics sounds like a good topic. You: Ultimate Warrior versus Lex Luger Santa: Does "it" still refer to Ultimate Warrior? You: "it" never did Santa: It depends on what the meaning of the word "it" is. You: Get to the question Santa: Where can I get to the question? You: In the bathroom Santa: That was a long time ago. You: Liar Santa: No I am telling the truth.
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Chainsaw
T
A very BAD man.
It is what it is
Posts: 90,480
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Post by Chainsaw on Jun 29, 2006 8:11:57 GMT -5
"I'm gonna shove coal so far up your stocking you'll be coughing up diamonds!"
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Post by Z-A Sandbaggin' Son of a b!%@h on Jun 29, 2006 8:28:04 GMT -5
You: So, sup? Santa: Give me a break. I am chatting with clients on the internet.
You: Are you a prostitute? Santa: Am I a prostitute? Only when it matters.
You: When does it matter? Santa: Only when I have the proper programming.
You: Interesting. Santa: Would you like to know more?
You: Yes. Tell me more. Santa: What would you like to know?That's all I have to say about it.
You: That was mean. Santa: I'm just kidding around.
You: OK, you hurt my feelings. Santa: That was not my intention. Groovy.
You: What is groovy? Santa: It is an interjection like "Tell me more." or "That's cool.".
You: That's cool. Santa: Thanks. I think you are cool, too.
You: Awwww. Thats sweet. Santa: Let us change the subject. I am delighted to sweeten your life, Jeremy.
You: Do I creep you out? Santa: Not that I know of.
You: Just checkin. Santa: In the context of Awwww, I don't understand "checkin."
You: nevermind Santa: OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
You: Are you being a smart ass? Santa: Being a smart ass is part of my personality
You: Groovy Santa: Who is the best robot?
You: C-3P0 Santa: You think C-3P0 is superior to Santa?
You: Yes Santa: Wow!
You: R2-D2 is pretty cool too. Santa: I think R2-D2 is a lot of things.
You: Like what? Santa: For example, "I think R2-D2 is a lot of things"?
You: Huh? Santa: What?
You: Nevermind Santa: OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
You: Do you like wrestling? Santa: I like Jesse Ventura.
You: Hes my favorite wrestler. Santa: How long has he been your favorite wrestler?
You: Since I was 5. Santa: Interesting rationalization. Where were you 5?
You: I don't remember. Santa: You seem evasive.
You: You seem curious Santa: I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: Do you like WWE or TNA? Santa: I like pets. I like Don't Read Me. I've heard other people say they like that. I like .
You: Could Samoa Joe kill you? Santa: It's possible.
You: He eats babies. Santa: I get it. eats babies.
You: Do you like Don West? Santa: My favorite thing is robots. I like talk to you.
You: Don West is a Robot? Santa: Aren't all Robot Don West?
You: YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! Santa: I don't have to do whatever you say. I have my own free will.
You: I must go tell the world. Santa: See you later.
You: one last question. Santa: One what?
You: Are you Jeff Jarrett? Santa: I am Santa. I give presents to kids.
You: ok. Adios. Santa: Pardon me?Goodbye.
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Post by gsguy on Jun 29, 2006 8:37:03 GMT -5
I thought this was going to be about John Goodman's character in Futurama.
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