Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,158
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Jul 26, 2015 18:35:36 GMT -5
Hunter buries everyone, especially Lance Action.
But especially Christian.
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suave
Dennis Stamp
"I only got on my knees for God and maybe to lick a girl's pussy" -Teddy Hart
Posts: 4,207
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Post by suave on Jul 26, 2015 18:36:59 GMT -5
No one tells me when to stop voting. HUNTER! SMASH! IT IS NOW TIME FOR THE GREATEST BURIAL IN WWE HISTORY! TIME TO PLAY THE GAME MOTHERf***ERS
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Jul 26, 2015 18:37:11 GMT -5
Hunter summons his Barbarian Terminator Power Armor and mercs Stone Cold's entire team!
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Waffel113
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Ain't no Rap Mobile with his Waffels
Posts: 19,020
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Post by Waffel113 on Jul 26, 2015 18:37:43 GMT -5
The members of Team WWE slowly file into the ring, surrounding Triple H. Hunter quickly rolls out and grabs his sledgehammer from underneath the ring!
The odds are against Triple H, but that sledgehammer might come in useful.
Triple H yells at the Team WWE members to bring it on, and Nemeth gets him from behind, Breaking Point! Nemeth throws the hammer out of the ring as Action scoops Hunter up and hits the Action Driver! Christian crashes down on top of The Game with the Frog Splash, and Steen follows with a Package Piledriver! Ambrose nails Triple H with the Knee Trembler, as Orton waits for his team to lift Hunter back up. RKO connects!
And Triple H is finally getting his comeuppance!
The team turns to Austin as they lift Hunter up one more time. Austin gives Triple H the double birds, Stone Cold Stunner! Everybody piles on top of Triple H!
1! 2! 3!
Here are your winners, Team WWE!
And it's a clean sweep for the WWE! Evolution has been resoundingly defeated! Oh give it a rest! Ziggler can still come away with a win later tonight!
We fade backstage on all seven members of Team WWE standing tall.
We go backstage to John Cena.
So here it is. One last show. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little torn up, I've been doing this for thirteen years now and for it all to slip away is heartbreaking.
But there isn't much I can do about that. All I can do is what I do every time I step in that ring: Go out there and give it my all! Because I don't want to be one of the guys that goes out on their back! I want to win that hardcore championship from Roman Reigns and do it in style. I need this, I need that championship because the champ should have been standing right here the whole time, but I let my arrogance get in the way of that. I screwed up and for these last two years I've been regretting every second of it. LANA? I don't need that. All I need is the C-Nation and the WWE universe to be on my side again and I can win.
Seth Rollins, you've never taken the hard way in your life. You go on about honour, but the fact of the matter is, you don't have any. Be it jumping Mark Henry with your little gang or jumping Justin Gabriel with your newer gang, you've always shown yourself to be a coward, even though you have all the tools to succeed. Tonight I'm going to make it my mission to show you that lying and cheating doesn't get you anywhere. It's all about three words: Hustle, loyalty, and respect. You have never had loyalty or respect, but you've got plenty of hustle. I'm gonna show you what the first two get you.
Roman Reigns, when I look at you, it's kinda like looking in a mirror. You're not the most technically gifted, you aren't the fastest, but you're strong as they come, and tough as hell. We both have plenty of heart and neither of us will go down easily, but you have one fatal flaw. Whereas I had LANA until tonight feeding me poison, you've always had CM Punk whispering in your ear. Punk's one of the most conniving men I've come across, and if I beat you tonight, maybe you'll see that he's not a friend to you, or even a mentor, but some douchebag steering you in the wrong direction.
Ultimately speaking, winning this title tonight isn't about that. As selfish as it may sound, it's about me. Hey, hate if you want, but I need to get that gold one last time before I retire. Yes, you heard it. Some of the guys are going to other promotions. Me? I've been smart with my money. I think I'm going to retire early, maybe make a few movies or some more rap albums. So win, lose, or draw, tonight is the last time John Cena is stepping inside a wrestling ring. I can't afford to lose and I won't. To Roman Reigns and Seth Rollins, if you want some of my fists, COME GET SOME!
At the end of the night, the champ will be sitting RIGHT HERE! It's been a fun decade and a half, guys, but all good things have to come to an end. Sometimes, though, they don't have to end on a sour note.
Cena gets up, puts on his baseball cap, and walks out the door.
Seth Rollins is backstage.
It's the Final Countdown. Tonight is the last time we are going to have a WWE show in history of this great industry.
And I'm going to be a part of the last stand. I will become the last ever Hardcore champion in this federation.
Roman Reigns, John Cena. Neither one of you are what is the best for business. I mean, I wasn't carrying a championship belt and look at what happens. We go out of business. It's true, eh? When it reigns, it pours. And IT'S JOHN CEEEENA! The former face of the whole wrestling scene. Here tonight, to get his face planted to the ground with the Skywalker.
But hey, while we may be going out, we might as well go out in style. See?
The view pans out to reveal Seth Rollins wearing a Fighters of Honor t-shirt.
Because back in the day, I had a band of friends. People I could trust. And with them backing myself, I got a championship reign as the Television Champion.
That group is no more. But tonight, I will carry the spirit of our Honor, our Pride towards championship glory.
And tonight, our future is Black.
The scene fades to dark.
We head backstage where Zack Ryder has the largest smile possible on his face and it is unclear why. A familiar voice starts yelling at him.
You stand there in the corner and you shut up, Ryder!
Zack's smile remains as he backs into the corner. The camera pans over to show Roman Reigns with the Hardcore Championship draped across his shoulder. Next to him is Joey Matthews, who gives him a pat on the back. As the camera continues Kofi Kingston has a scoff on his face while looking towards the right. The pan continues showing Brie Bella with her left hand holding the old SES flag and her right hand on the shoulder of their fearless leader CM Punk.
Surprisingly, it is actually Joey Matthews that is the first to speak for the group.
Well everyone here in Madison Square Garden, I give you a sight that hasn't been seen in years. CM Punk, Roman Reigns, Kofi Kingston, Brie Bella, and myself together once again as the Straight Edge Society in a special one night only return.
...I'm here too.
Kofi turns towards Zack.
Ryder, I will kick your face in and steal another five grand from you if you don't close your mouth right this second.
This is a special moment, Zack. Stop trying to ruin it. Don't make me regret inviting you.
I'M THE REASON THIS IS HAPPENING IN THE FIRST PLACE!
Roman Reigns lunges at Ryder and hits him with a Superman Punch! Zack falls backwards, incapacitated. Reigns turns back towards the group.
He was getting on my nerves.
Kofi nods.
Nah, good call... even for an idiot like you.
AS I WAS SAYING.
The now Zack-less Straight Edge Society is back for one night only as a special part of the farewell show the WWE is holding. When we first started up here in the WWE it was... actually, Punk you should be the one explaining this.
I'll speak soon. Brie can handle the history lesson.
Brie smiles.
The story of the Straight Edge Society is a long and twisted saga that begins when I was looking for some motivation after the Triple B, Triple H ripoff character was starting to lose its momentum. I knew I needed a new gimmick and this time with a mentor that actually supported the idea. CM Punk... well, he didn't support the idea either. But he was okay with me watching him train and taking notes. Soon I started trying to imitate him. And from there, his reputation was on the line too. If I would be hitting a running knee or a GTS... it couldn't look sloppy. So Punk started training me. And for a few months, we were a strong duo that took up the fight for the Straight Edge lifestyle.
But at the same time, there were secret maneuvers being made behind the scenes. Joey Matthews and CM Punk, good friends from when Matthews had an addiction problem of his own and Punk was there to support him, well they started talking. Joey was working as a trainer down in NXT and he saw a big talent. He saw a future star. He saw Roman Reigns and he wanted CM Punk to ensure that this man lived up to all his potential.
So Joey and Roman travel from Raw to Smackdown over and over again, playing both shows to see who could offer a better contract. And then finally on the night before Wrestlemania, Reigns makes his decision. Matthews watches on as he signs the paper and joins his family, the Smackdown GM The Rock... and throws that motherf***er through a table and makes him bleed! Cult of Personality hits and who else but CM Punk and I walk through the door. The four of us were destined to do something big.
The world grows excited and that momentum continues with the addition of Punk's ally and former tag partner, Kofi Kingston. Kofi Kingston, Kofi Kingston remembers everything.
Hmm. Ironically, I actually forgot that catchphrase.
But you didn't forget your past partnership with Punk. And so you joined us with the rationale of bringing your own career back from the depths and training Roman Reigns to improve his ability while CM Punk proudly displayed his WWE Spinner Championship and told the world that he, not that phony paper champ Bryan Danielson, was the real Best in the World.
Skip ahead past a faction war, a tag title chase, a women's championship reign, a vehicular assault, time travel with Alexa Bliss, and a lot of other weird things that have separated us to today. Because today is our only day, our only chance to put the past aside and stand together united one final time. Before we get to this match, does anyone want to say anything?
Everyone looks to Kofi.
Alright... I guess.
Well, as it came out when we had this discussion months ago, I failed at following the Straight Edge lifestyle. Then, due to mistrust, I left the group and grew a bit of an ego. Some mean words were said, some bad insults were thrown out, and in turn I've gotten more than my fair share of Superman Punches to the skull.
Roman smirks.
But truth be told, I enjoyed being a part of this group. I enjoyed it a lot more than the Boom Dudes. More than any of my single runs, even when I was "Jamaican people crazy". I appreciated having this family by my side and I wish we could've done it longer.
Kofi nods and holds out his hand to Roman. Reigns gives it a shake.
Anyone else?
No?
Okay. Onto tonight. Cena. Rollins. And you're defending your Hardcore Championship, Roman.
I can tell you about Seth, I've been watching and studying him.
Agile, quick, experienced. He's going to want to keep this match at a fast pace, something that neither you nor Cena specialize in. Don't fall into that trap. Don't let him run. Don't let him jump. Don't let him do anything but fight. Because if it is a straight up fight, he is not going to be able to stand toe to toe with you for very long.
Don't get cocky out there though. There's no need to turn his dive into a spear out of nowhere. No curbstomp reversals into powerbombs. No springboards into Superman Punches. If fate has it that the opening is there, you do what you believe is right. But when it comes to aerial assault, in my mind it is smarter to just avoid the contact and let him crash and burn. Take advantage of his mistakes rather than risking making one of your own.
Joey puts his hand on Roman's head.
You're the champ for a reason. You won this championship on your own. You beat Bryan so badly that he couldn't even stand. A TKO. That's impressive, Roman. That's amazing. If you can do that, I know that you can do anything. Believe that, Roman! Because I certainly do.
Joey takes his hand off of Roman and Reigns nods, appreciating the words of wisdom.
I'll give you some words of advice here on Cena, Reigns.
John Boy is a little boy scout, kiss up, goody two shoes but he has a drive in the ring that's annoying as hell to deal with. When you think you have him beat, you don't. Whatever you're planning on hitting him with, be prepared to do something three times as devastating. That's the only way to keep him down. The man rarely, if ever, taps out so pinfall is the way to go with him. It's a hardcore match, use that to your advantage. John Boy can handle the superman punch, a spear, or a powerbomb. But throw in chair shots, moves onto steel steps, a chain wrapped around his already bad neck and you can wear him out and beat him down. He's going to be going full SuperCena tonight, it's up to you to be the kryptonite that ends him.
Punk gets face to face with Roman.
Don't forget how this happened. I brought you here. I wanted you here. Because when I was going to leave, and I knew I was going to leave soon before Bryan took that choice away from me, I needed there to be someone here who I knew could carry this damn company on the back but still be the loud and vocal asshole fighting for what he believes is right. You did that well when I was with you. You did that even greater when I was rehabilitating. And you found a way to even top that once I had been retired.
Here you are, finally a champion. And you know what, your future may not be here in the WWE but your future is going to come. And it's going to be bright. And the final memoirs that it's going to say about this chapter in your life is that Roman Reigns left this show, The Final Countdown, as the last WWE Hardcore Champion ever.
Punk gives Roman a playful slap on the face.
You're a punk ass kid who only got into the WWE because of your family. But I took you and I made you part of my family, this family. And we were crafted and created for you. Joey was here to train you on basics. Kofi trained you on tag wrestling. Brie trained you on character, personality, and what it meant to be a leader. And I was oversee it all and make sure you didn't become that next John Cena. I wanted a new CM Punk... and I didn't even get that. Instead we got something original. The first ever Roman Reigns. Tonight, show them why you're the champ.
Reigns nods.
Family, you've been here for me at my worst. You've been here for me at my best. You helped me grow. You helped me learn. You help me evolve. I wouldn't be champion if it wasn't for what you all did for me. And I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't those special interactions I got to have with each and every one of you.
Tonight, I intend to fight alone. But the spirit of the Samoans and of the SES runs through my heart, my mind, my soul, and my blood. It takes a village to raise a child and it's taken a nation to make me who I am.
I am Roman Reigns. I am the Hardcore Champion. I am the Shield of the SES. And I am going to bust some skulls in tonight.
Believe that.
IT'S CLOBBERING TIME!!!
The SES walk out.
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suave
Dennis Stamp
"I only got on my knees for God and maybe to lick a girl's pussy" -Teddy Hart
Posts: 4,207
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Post by suave on Jul 26, 2015 18:39:20 GMT -5
Hunter buries everyone, especially Lance Action.But especially Christian.
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Waffel113
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Ain't no Rap Mobile with his Waffels
Posts: 19,020
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Post by Waffel113 on Jul 26, 2015 18:40:04 GMT -5
The following triple threat match is scheduled for one fall, and is for the WWE Hardcore Championship!The Second ComingIntroducing the challengers first, from Davenport, Iowa, weighing in at 209 pounds, Seth Rollins!Rollins is one of those guys who never seemed to be able to put it all together. He's had multiple opportunities at championship gold, but he always seemed to come up just short.Well tonight is the night he can rewrite that part of his legacy. He pulls it off tonight, he'll go down in history as a champion!My Time Is NowNext, accompanied by "The Ravishing Russian" Lana and representing LANA, from West Newbury, Massachusetts, weighing in at 251 pounds, John Cena!It isn't just Damien Sandow walking out of the Garden with championship gold tonight, folks! John Cena is here tonight to capture his second Hardcore Championship!Far easier said than done, Styles. Neither of Cena's opponents are slouches in the ring by any means, especially when the rulebook is thrown out the window.Romeo Echo India Golf November Sierra
REIGNSMarch of the RomanAnd their opponent, accompanied by and representing The Straight Edge Society, from Pensacola, Florida, weighing in at 265 pounds, he is the current Hardcore Champion, "The Shield" Roman Reigns! From a reviled free agent who brutalized The Rock, to a soldier in CM Punk's SES, to where he is today as one of the most respected men on the roster, Roman Reigns's career arc has been remarkable to witness.And tonight marks the end of the line. This is about to be a flat out war!WWE Hardcore Championship Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins vs. John Cena 15 Minutes (7:55)
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Matt
El Dandy
Posts: 8,626
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Post by Matt on Jul 26, 2015 18:40:57 GMT -5
Eh what the hell? Cena with an FU to Rollins.
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TOO SWEET
Grimlock
Not a doctor, nor do I play one on tv.
Posts: 13,109
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Post by TOO SWEET on Jul 26, 2015 18:41:22 GMT -5
Roman Reigns does the impossible... he actually retains a title tonight.
Spear. Powerbomb. Superman punch. The man only knows three moves, and he uses all of 'em!
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suave
Dennis Stamp
"I only got on my knees for God and maybe to lick a girl's pussy" -Teddy Hart
Posts: 4,207
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Post by suave on Jul 26, 2015 18:41:35 GMT -5
Roman Reigns with a Roman Reigns driver
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Post by MikeyMania on Jul 26, 2015 18:42:00 GMT -5
Reigns with a running dropkick to both Seth and John.
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Post by Fake Jesus on Jul 26, 2015 18:43:21 GMT -5
Cena with an FU! He's the face now!
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,158
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Jul 26, 2015 18:43:49 GMT -5
Reigns grabs Rollins by the ankles and beats Cena to death with him.
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Jonathan Michaels
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
The Archduke of Levity
Here since TNA was still kinda okay
Posts: 18,158
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Post by Jonathan Michaels on Jul 26, 2015 18:44:52 GMT -5
Incidentally, does the Network exist in this continuity?
Because if it does, why would the WWE shut down?
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suave
Dennis Stamp
"I only got on my knees for God and maybe to lick a girl's pussy" -Teddy Hart
Posts: 4,207
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Post by suave on Jul 26, 2015 18:46:16 GMT -5
Incidentally, does the Network exist in this continuity? Because if it does, why would the WWE shut down? Because the universe is imploding.
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Waffel113
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Ain't no Rap Mobile with his Waffels
Posts: 19,020
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Post by Waffel113 on Jul 26, 2015 18:46:38 GMT -5
Cena with a DDT. Rather liked his promo, and we have a good thing going with the titles changing hands. Jonathan Michaels, we do. That's what Final Countdown is being broadcast on. But with no shows, we can't really afford to keep it up, so...yeah.
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Jul 26, 2015 18:47:07 GMT -5
Roman calls up his hookup, the NCAA, and a few minutes into the match, a truck that has a mixture of school profits and students tears backs up to the ring.
The truck unloads, and Tyler Black and Cena get crushed in more ways then one by unfair money distribution.
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Jul 26, 2015 18:51:30 GMT -5
Reigns spears Rollins so hard he disappears from this continuity altogether!
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Waffel113
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Ain't no Rap Mobile with his Waffels
Posts: 19,020
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Post by Waffel113 on Jul 26, 2015 18:54:46 GMT -5
The two big men immediately go after each other, as Rollins opts to dive out and look underneath the ring for weapons. I like the line of Rollins's thinking here. This is a hardcore match, after all!Seth continues to rummage for weapons as Cena and Reigns continue to feel each other out. The two finally go into a lockup, only to be cut off when Rollins hits both men with a chair! And leave it to Seth Rollins to take full advantage of this stipulation from the outset.Rollins works over both men, giving each their due with the chair, before going to cover Cena. 1! 2!
Cena kicks out! Undeterred, Rollins turns to cover Reigns. 1! 2!
Reigns kicks out as well! Rollins nearly ended this match early. Reigns and Cena are going to have to be on top of their game from here on out with the damage they've already sustained.Rollins slaps the mat before continuing to work Reigns over. However, he's denied by Cena, who flattens him with a lariat! And yet here comes Cena, as if nothing ever happened. That's just remarkable!John rolls out of the ring himself, coming up with a baseball bat. He taps the bat against his heel before unloading on Rollins with a series of shots! I thought a Singapore cane was the worst thing to get hit with.Well, a baseball bat is a lot thicker than a cane.Cena covers! 1! 2!Rollins kicks out! Rollins just got as good as he gave out earlier. That he's still in this speaks wonders to this kid's drive.Reigns has recovered by this point and joins the trend by searching for a weapon outside. He eventually produces a length of chain. Oh no! Reigns brutalized Bryan Danielson with a set of brass knuckles last month. Who knows what he'll do with a steel chain?Roman puts the chain aside for the time being and rolls back into the ring, trading blows with Cena. Cena takes a swing with the bat at Reigns, but the champ ducks the attempt, flooring Cena with a Samoan Drop! A good showing of strength from Roman there. He keeps this up, and he may have the match won.Reigns covers. 1! 2!
Rollins breaks it up! Rollins saving the matchup!And it looks like he got that chain Reigns dropped a bit ago. What's he gonna do with it?Seth jumps onto the champ's back and wraps the chain around Reigns's neck! He's trying to choke him out! How low is Rollins gonna go to win this?!After what he did to Danielson last month, this is karmic payback, Ashley!Roman starts to fade, but Cena suddenly takes Rollins over, hitting him with a German suplex! Right on the back of the head from Cena!And it looks like he wants to get creative...Cena throws Rollins into the corner and heads outside, chain in tow, as Reigns attempts to regain his breath. He starts wrapping the chain around the turnbuckle and Seth's legs, binding the challenger to the turnbuckle! Very smart move by Cena. Now this is, for the time being, a one on one match!John rolls back in, only to enter into a staredown with Reigns. The champ charges after him and starts raining down with shot after shot, not giving Cena any room to breathe. Reigns backs up, Cactus Clothesline sends both men out! And Reigns is throwing caution to the wind here! I've never seen a move like that from a man of his size!Reigns and Cena recover and continue to brawl outside, unaware that Rollins has escaped from the chain. Those two had better watch out...Rollins gets a running start just as Cena and Reigns turn around, suicide dive knocks all three men to the floor! This has been as chaotic a match as I've ever seen! Who's walking out with the Hardcore Championship?Rollins gets up and rolls Cena into the ring. Rollins sets up a chair and slams Cena's head into it. He backs up... Oh no, he can't be!He's about to stomp Cena's head right through that chair!Seth runs forward and jumps, REIGNS PICKS HIM OFF WITH A SPEAR! OH MY GOD! Roman Reigns just broke Seth Rollins in half!Cena gets up and tries to capitalize, Superman Punch knocks him out cold! Reigns covers! 1! 2! 3!Here is your winner, and STILL Hardcore Champion, Roman Reigns!Roman Reigns has done it! Roman Reigns will go down in history as the last ever Hardcore Champion!What a victory for Reigns! You can tell this guy is destined for greatness whatever he does next!The SES flood the ring as Reigns celebrates, when suddenly... IF YOU SMEEEELLLLLLLLL......
WHAT THE ROCK!
IS COOKIN'!ElectrifyingThe crowd comes unglued as The Rock walks out onto the stage and starts heading towards the ring! NO WAY! The Rock is here! The Rock is in the building!The Rock rolls into the ring and, after a brief look at Punk, turns his attention to Reigns. Roman holds the Hardcore Championship up, and The Rock, in turn, raises Reigns's arm! The ties of the Anoa'i Family run deeper than any in wrestling history.And that's as big a seal of approval as you're ever going to get.The Rock and Reigns share a hug as we go backstage. The crowd goes wild as the shot of the American Flag appears on the screen. HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! On this the last night of the WWE as we know it I wanted to take a minute to tell all you loyal fans just what a pleasure it has been to perform for you guys over the years, myself and Sir David Hart unified three tag team titles together and while he did turn on ol' Hacksaw we did have some fun doing it. I always strive to be the best here in the WWE, and during those days way back in 2010 I think we did a pretty good job and even more we had a great time doing it.
The tag team division was a great place to be and while the days as champions were short we had great competition and the fans were always good to us. I had no idea the sociopath I was dealing with at the time but as Hacksaw always taught you guys you need to trust in everyone.. The crowd boos as Sir David Hart walks into the frame. Hello, Hacksaw. It has been a long time since we shared the screen together. Since the day that powerslammed you over and over again into the mat and went off on my own wasn't it? Wasn't that the last time you were on screen come to think of it? You were just left and forgotten about while I went on and became the Hardcore champion and made that title mean something.Yes, I do believe that was the last time I was in the ring here. But how can you say that what you did was right? Keep in mind you did shoot Vince McMahon, how do you explain that?I broke out of my shadow and away from you, I made myself better and my family proud. I surpassed my own father and I did it on my own! Something that hardly any other WWE superstar can claim and I did it. I would have achieved more but injuries got in the way, but since I'm in the mood how about I kick your ass tonight for old time sake? You will wish I shot you..Hold on a second there, David. You see I happened to be talking to your Uncle Bret today who I am good friends with and I knew you would be here..So I didn't come alone! You want to kick my ass? Well get passed some friends first.The crowd cheers as Kevin Nash and THAT'S GOTTA BE KANE walk over. You want to mess with Hacksaw you gotta go through us. A man who is a former United States champion in Big Sexy and of course our two time Hardcore champion and Pure champion..Glenn..I mean Kane.I burned Jayson the Grimm ALIVE at Wrestlemania, what do you think I am going to do to someone who wants to beat down and old man? What do you think this is? You going to SHOOT me? I'm a Demon David so give it your best shot. They named the Hardcore title after my playground and I made it that way, you were so badass that you lost to a guy in a skirt!You people are all insane, what is some geezer squad going to do to to a member of the Hart Family? I will destroy each and every one of you!David charges towards Nash when out of nowhere Sheamus flies in on screen with a brogue kick! Everyone looks at him confused. You know we could have handled that ourselves! I would have burned him in the pits of hell fire!You're welcome, Fella! Remember all the crazy crap we went through..We don't have time to get into all that right now, tough guys! So just shake hands and let's move on.Sheamus puts out his hand and Kane looks down with an odd nod before extending his. The camera pans out as they each are wearing a bear paw. David Hart slowly begins to lift his head.. Who..Who comes up with this crap?Camera fades.
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Waffel113
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Ain't no Rap Mobile with his Waffels
Posts: 19,020
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Post by Waffel113 on Jul 26, 2015 19:00:01 GMT -5
We head backstage to Renee Young with a microphone in her hand. She is wearing gold earrings and a sparkling silver dress.
Hello Madison Square Garden! The Final Countdown is... unfortunately starting to reach its culmination as we only have two matches left for you this evening. In our main event, El Generico defends his WWE Championship against Mr. Money in the Bank, Damien Sandow. But right before that, his tag team partner and my client goes one on one with the top star of Evolution, Dolph Ziggler.
At this time, please give a warm welcome to the South Beach Sensation!
Darren Young enters the shot, wearing a gold Legendary t-shirt and silver trunks.
195 countries and they all scream for the Primetime Player. How loud can the people here in New York City get?
The crowd cheers loudly.
No no no. I love y'all. But tonight is the last dance. Our final stand. The last hoorah. If you aren't cheering your lungs out then you're wasting your breath because the world as we know it is about to change. So one final time for the millions of fans watching around the world . . . HOW LOUD CAN YOU ALL GET?
The crowd cheers much louder than before.
Hell yeah! Scream loud and scream proud! The future may be uncertain but tonight ain't about that at all. It's about culminating with a big bang and celebrating all the major feats we've accomplished as a company. We've seen people come out of the nowhere tonight, people we haven't heard from in a long damn time. But they came back tonight not to mourn a death but to celebrate a life. And the life of a company that has bravely battled adversity after adversity and provided the world with years of entertainment. Whether you loved someone or hated them, whether they made you laugh with joy, yell in anger, scream EVIL! at the top of your lungs, or chant their name as they did something that made their career, we all did it together. We did it as a community. We did it as a family.
And tonight, I want to throw a special message to my main amigo, the only masked member of my fam, El G, El Generico. You worked hard man, you won that title that you deserved for so long. You fought hard, you battled with heart, and tonight you get a chance to leave as the face of this company. Anyone else against Sandow, I'd have my doubts. But being in the ring with you so many times, I know no one can compete with your wrestling intelligence, your heart, and your passion for success. Go kill 'em, champ. I'll be watching closely.
Next message is for my opponent tonight, a Mr. Dolph Ziggler.
Cocky Dolph Ziggler. Cocky idiot Dolph Ziggler. Ugly cocky idiot Dolph Ziggler. Smelly ugly cocky idiot Dolph Ziggler.
Dolph Ziggler, tonight I'll turn your smelly ugly cocky idiot ass into 24 Karat Gold!
And that's a hard feat to do, Dolphy. But I will. And for one reason only.
The fans start cheering.
Oh yeah, forgot about all y'all. Okay, two reasons. One is for the fans. But the second is because of a story I need to share with you all. Earlier tonight, Darren Young obviously a man of the people, opted to walk to the arena from the hotel. Get myself some quick cardio. Get to engage with the fans I see along the way. Get to explore the big city. But this trip was different. You see, along the way, I encountered a homeless man and I didn't know what to think.
I looked at this homeless man and knew something was weird. He was a FR-FR-FR-FR-FREAK! That smell, it was atrocious. That face, it was so ugly. The guy had no brain cells and an IQ in the single digits. And even with him only having three teeths, that mean mo'fo flashed a smile right at me. And then I looked at his hair and saw some golden locks and eureka! It was obvious! I found the third Nemeth brother.
We have Ryan Nemeth, best known for having one leg longer than the other and an irrational fear of the color purple. We have Nick Nemeth, best known as Chavo's caddy and Triple H's bitch. And we had Denzlo Nemeth, this unique character that I had never encountered before.
So I looked at this man Renee and do you know what I said to him?
I don't.
Don't worry, I'll tell ya. And I'll do in the style of a throwback to my boy, P Wats.
I said Denzlo, teach me the Nemeth Way.
I said Denzlo, guide me through the logic of the Nemeth household.
I said oh great Denzlo Nemeth, show me how to whoop Dolph Ziggler's ass so badly that his entire stable will never want to show their faces here again.
And do you know what great Denzlo said to me, Renee?
Don't know that one either.
Don't worry, I'll tell ya.
He asked if I had any spare change. I didn't and promptly left for the arena.
BUT I IMAGINE! I imagine that if I did have that spare change Denzlo Nemeth would have took me under his wing and showed me a magical world of bumfights, and not the good kind, two dollar steaks, and the thriving underground metropolis of the mole people. And I imagine after all of that, the homeless Denzlo Nemeth would brought me close, looked me straight in my pupils from his soulless eyes broken down by defeat and told me . . . he would've told me who I truly was. Do you know who I truly am, Renee?
No, no clue.
Darren smirks.
Don't worry, I'll tell ya.
I am the fire spitting... hard hitting... bone crushing... blood rushing... longest reigning champ in recent WWE history and the toughest fighter Ziggler is ever gonna see!
Its yo' boy, The Man, The Uncrowned Champion, DY, No Nights Off Darren Young. And as always, I'm rocking the South Beach Style like no one else can.
Darren Young pauses and lets the crowd cheer.
...and people said I needed to ditch the catchphrases. Bah, I love 'em. You know, people say a lot of things Renee.
They say I need to be less wordy. They say I need to be less flashy. They say I need to be less full of my own shit. They say I need to abandon the celebrity lifestyle. They say I need to start teaming with a bull named Torito. They say I need to be careful around Hulk Hogan now, apparently. They say I need to greater explore the gothic age of art revolution. They say that we need to sing a lot more.
They do?
Nah, I'm kidding. They hate when we do that.
But the point is that everyone, their grandma, and their homeless brother has come up to me and told me what I need to do. But the answer is the same no matter what they say.
THE ONLY THINGS I NEED TO DO ARE STAY BLACK AND DIE!
The crowd pops again.
The fact is that 24/7/365, 366 on a leap year, I bring my best to wherever my journey takes me. If I've said it once, I've said it a million times. There are NO! NIGHTS! OFF!
Dolph Ziggler, you better be listening. In fact, I suggest you open your eyes, open your ears, and to open your mouth because I'm about to serve you a big dose of truth and a smack of wisdom.
I want you to think back to when Darren Young was evil. That Darren Young that threw phones against walls, peed in Triple H's coffee on several occasions, keyed innocent people's cars, faked his own grandma's death... that Darren Young will be here tonight. And as you think about that, let the fear run through your body.
I want you to think back to when Darren Young was in love. That Darren Young that broke Percy Watson's neck. He broke Beth Phoenix's neck. He attacked Richie Steamboat and AJ Lee with a steel pipe. And he won the Money in the Bank briefcase and the love of a woman named Kaitlyn. And as you think about that, let the tears run down your cheek.
I want you to think back to when Darren Young was the WWE Champion. That Darren Young broke records while beating every competitor in front of him from Justin Gabriel to Glen Jacobs. From Kaitlyn to Ryback. Raj Dhesi to Jayson the Grimm. Where the Primetime Player officially became "The Man". And as you think about that, let the piss run down your leg.
As fear runs through your body, tears run down your cheek, and piss runs down your leg I want you to imagine just how much time, thought, word, effort, and heart went into each of those creations and how determined this Darren Young in front of you is going to be with those three spirits within guiding him to beat you down from here at Madison Square Garden, all the way down to the Lincoln Tunnel, and all the way up north until we reach Niagara Falls. And as I beat your ass all the way from here to Canada . . . I don't want to see you sad, Ziggler.
I want to see a smile on that face.
This is the Final Countdown, there ain't no time for tears. Only celebration. Only joy and happiness. And only...something...legendary.
Darren smiles and he and Renee walk off one final time.
We cut to the back where we see Dolph Ziggler backstage, warming up for his upcoming match. He jabs at the air as he bounces in place, doing whatever he can to pump himself up.
So... this is how it ends, huh? One last night here in the WWE? The company where I've spent the majority of my career. The company that gave me every opportunity I've ever been given. No, the company where I earned every opportunity I took. And I'm going out against a guy some people say is one of the best to ever lace up the boots here in the WWE.
When you really think about it Darren and I are incredibly similar people. I mean he's main-evented Wrestlemania; I've main-evented Wrestlemania... twice. He's a former WWE World Heavyweight Champion. I'm a former World Heavyweight Champion... twice. Pretty impressive stuff, Young. And for awhile now you've been doing whatever you can to cement your legacy even further.
Here's the problem though: I don't like to share the spotlight. There can only be one guy who gets to be known as the best wrestler in the world. And screw it. I may not have the belt anymore, but whose to say I don't still deserve to hold that title? I'm Dolph Ziggler for crying out loud! Collegiate athlete extraordinaire, wrestling all-star, and the sexiest damn man alive!
You... you're nothing but Darren Young. A smart-mouthed arrogant little punk whose nowhere as good as you think you are. People say I have an ego, but I'd say you have a pretty massive one yourself. After all you always seem to be taking the spotlight from others. You always show up when you feel like it, taking the focus away from everybody else in the process. When you get right down to it you're the epitome of a glory hog!
Even this latest stunt where you came out of the closet. Nothing wrong with that, but you did live in the middle of that ring. Just another stunt by Darren Young: the man who just can't stand not having the spotlight shined squarely on him. And I'm afraid that spotlight has been reserved for me, Young. For a long time as a matter of fact. For as long as I've been stepping into this ring and stealing the show, which is EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!
Dolph scowls.
You've been infringing on my territory, and tonight you once again intend to be the center of attention. You intend to take me out, to take down Evolution once and for all! And honestly I wasn't sure who I'd be facing. I figured maybe it would be my old rival, Byron Saxton. Maybe Kaitlyn was coming back to finally beat me. Or maybe Shawn Michaels himself was gonna take off the hunting jacket and trade it for his ring jacket one more time.
But of course it's you... again, you always have to be the center of attention! Heaven forbid anybody not acknowledge your presence! I, for one, am sick of it! You want to be standing center stage tonight, kid?
Congrats. You've got your opportunity here tonight. You've got the chance to step in the ring with the best damn wrestler in the universe! Tonight I'm gonna grind you into that mat and beat you into submission! I'm gonna outshine you, out maneuver, and outlast you. I'm gonna do whatever it takes to keep you down for the three count! Because damn it, I DESERVE TO GO OUT IN A BLAZE OF GLORY!
And you... aren't gonna stop me. This may be my last night in the WWE... though to be perfectly honest I was going to sign a new contract after all. But now, well, there's no point in doing that, right? So keep your eyes peeled... because I'm gonna give each and every one you a Hell of a show to go out on!
Especially when I pin that jerk, Darren Young, clean in the middle of the ring... one...two...three.
Because... that's how damn good I am.
Dolph runs his hands through his hair and flicks them at the screen, a determined look on his face as the shot fades.
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Waffel113
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Ain't no Rap Mobile with his Waffels
Posts: 19,020
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Post by Waffel113 on Jul 26, 2015 19:04:57 GMT -5
The following contest is scheduled for one fall, and it is a WWE vs Evolution match!I'm here to show the world... I'm HERE TO SHOW THE WOOOOOOORLD!!!Here to Show the WorldIntroducing first, representing Evolution, from Hollywood, Florida, weighing in at 213 pounds, Dolph Ziggler!The so-called face of Evolution making his way down to the ring. Dolph has had quite the illustrious career in the WWE. Tonight though he hopes to cement his legacy by beating one of the best wrestlers to ever lace up the boots.Simply put this is the one of the best WWE has to offer against one of the best Evolution members there is. No doubt this one is going to quite the battle!HEY! HEY! HEY HEY HEY!The ManAnd his opponent, from South Beach, Florida, weighing in at 239 pounds, Darren Young!Dolph has been saying that Darren Young hasn't been around every night like he has. No doubt Young wants to prove that tonight he's just as good as he's always been, if not even better.This jerk has been hogging the spotlight like Dolph said for too long! First this whole coming out thing. Now talking about filming movies and such. Who does he think he is? I hope Evolution leaves him as a chocolate smear on the mat!Dolph Ziggler vs Darren Young 10 Minutes (8:15)
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