92 Royal Rumble - Child's-Eye View
Aug 18, 2015 5:00:45 GMT -5
'Foretold' Joker, Mozenrath, and 18 more like this
Post by cuppacoffee - slight return on Aug 18, 2015 5:00:45 GMT -5
So, my seven year old little boy has recently started watching wrestling, as detailed in this thread. Some folks were pretty amused / impressed by his observations.
He's really into Royal Rumble matches at the moment, so I was delighted when he asked to see one with Ric Flair in. I was also a little apprehensive, as it'd be the oldest thing he'd watched to date. He's familiar with current WWE, plus some Attitude Era stuff. Would the presentation seem hokey? Would the style of wrestling seem different to him. Here's a summary of his notes on the match:
Bulldog enters: "Oh, no... Not him..."
Bulldog press-slams Flair: "You didn't tell me Bulldog used to be strong! He was a good wrestler!"
Haku enters (no reaction. I ask if he recognises him from the 2000 Rumble): "Him? The hair guy?"
Michaels enters: "Oh, no... Is he going to bleed in this?" (having seen a bit of post-comeback Michaels, all he really knows him as is "the guy who gets busted open.")
On Texas Tornado's boots: "He's like a rip-off of Tyler Breeze."
On being informed that Tyler Breeze was 4 years old when this match happened: "Well, this guy still isn't as good as him."
On discovering that Von Erich only had one foot: "Well, that'd explain why he's not as good as Tyler Breeze."
On Taker's original look: "Undertaker looks very different now. Here, he's got a lot more hair, and a normal forehead."
When pressed on the "normal forehead" remark: "Normal sized, not like his now, or yours." (thanks, son)
Savage leaps out of the ring in pursuit of Jake, seemingly eliminating himself: "He's an idiot, like that Mexican guy!"
(Mil Masceras in 1997. Thankfully, with the help of Heenan and Monsoon's commentary, kayfabe is maintained, and he's just relieved that they've got better rules these days)
Duggan works the crowd: "Huh? The guy in the blue pants just gets people chanting USA? What does he do in other countries?"
On being informed that Duggan does exactly the same thing everywhere: "He is really stupid. Did he ever win anything?"
Hogan enters: "Now who is this guy?"
I explain, "That's Hulk Hogan, son."
"Oooh... Yeah... I know him... He's that guy who's always on television and just talks a lot."
Stares, puzzled, at Hogan, then laughs: "This guy is like Dana Brooke. Look, he's got the same white hair and the same orange skin. Does he suck, too?"
On being informed that Hogan was the most popular wrestler of the 1980s: "Really? Seriously?"
Flair wins, Hogan and Sid square off in the ring: "Well, they're definitely having a match at Wrestlemania." (You'd have thought so, son. You'd have thought so...)
Mean Gene shouts "Put that cigarette out!" mid-interview: Laughs hysterically. This, so far as he is concerned, is the funniest thing ever to have happened in wrestling. Spends the afternoon cutting me off mid-sentence by yelling, "Put that cigarette out!"
I think he liked it.
He's really into Royal Rumble matches at the moment, so I was delighted when he asked to see one with Ric Flair in. I was also a little apprehensive, as it'd be the oldest thing he'd watched to date. He's familiar with current WWE, plus some Attitude Era stuff. Would the presentation seem hokey? Would the style of wrestling seem different to him. Here's a summary of his notes on the match:
Bulldog enters: "Oh, no... Not him..."
Bulldog press-slams Flair: "You didn't tell me Bulldog used to be strong! He was a good wrestler!"
Haku enters (no reaction. I ask if he recognises him from the 2000 Rumble): "Him? The hair guy?"
Michaels enters: "Oh, no... Is he going to bleed in this?" (having seen a bit of post-comeback Michaels, all he really knows him as is "the guy who gets busted open.")
On Texas Tornado's boots: "He's like a rip-off of Tyler Breeze."
On being informed that Tyler Breeze was 4 years old when this match happened: "Well, this guy still isn't as good as him."
On discovering that Von Erich only had one foot: "Well, that'd explain why he's not as good as Tyler Breeze."
On Taker's original look: "Undertaker looks very different now. Here, he's got a lot more hair, and a normal forehead."
When pressed on the "normal forehead" remark: "Normal sized, not like his now, or yours." (thanks, son)
Savage leaps out of the ring in pursuit of Jake, seemingly eliminating himself: "He's an idiot, like that Mexican guy!"
(Mil Masceras in 1997. Thankfully, with the help of Heenan and Monsoon's commentary, kayfabe is maintained, and he's just relieved that they've got better rules these days)
Duggan works the crowd: "Huh? The guy in the blue pants just gets people chanting USA? What does he do in other countries?"
On being informed that Duggan does exactly the same thing everywhere: "He is really stupid. Did he ever win anything?"
Hogan enters: "Now who is this guy?"
I explain, "That's Hulk Hogan, son."
"Oooh... Yeah... I know him... He's that guy who's always on television and just talks a lot."
Stares, puzzled, at Hogan, then laughs: "This guy is like Dana Brooke. Look, he's got the same white hair and the same orange skin. Does he suck, too?"
On being informed that Hogan was the most popular wrestler of the 1980s: "Really? Seriously?"
Flair wins, Hogan and Sid square off in the ring: "Well, they're definitely having a match at Wrestlemania." (You'd have thought so, son. You'd have thought so...)
Mean Gene shouts "Put that cigarette out!" mid-interview: Laughs hysterically. This, so far as he is concerned, is the funniest thing ever to have happened in wrestling. Spends the afternoon cutting me off mid-sentence by yelling, "Put that cigarette out!"
I think he liked it.
? 
