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Post by Kris Kobain on Jul 4, 2010 0:04:04 GMT -5
Kris: "Clutching victory in his hands and taking the world by storm, your hero Kris Kobain is quickly rising to the top! My opponent this week is a nobody, a nothing, just a phantom presence in the air. My opponent this week is a.......hey who is my opponent this week?"
Camera man: "Nobody"
Kris: "Yeah I already said that. But what's his name."
Camera man: "No one."
Kris: "I know he's a no one. Does he have a name?"
Camera man: "You don't have an opponent."
Kris: " I know it seems that way when I overshadow my opponents but there is a body in the ring with me."
Camer man: "No. I mean you don't have a match scheduled."
Kris: "Yeah it's less of a match and more of a beat down."
Camer man: "Let's try this again. You were suspended this week remember?"
Kris: "Yeah.....and your point?"
Camer man: "You won't have a match."
Kris: "Yeah we covered that part. Beat down. Remember?"
Camera man: "Um maybe Seth should explain this to you."
Kris: "Why would you want me to talk to that sniviling pile of garbage?"
Camera man: "I think we're out of time Kris..."
Kris: "But who is my opponent?"
Camera man: "No one."
Kris: " I know he's a no one....."
The camera cuts off as Kris and the camera man continue to go back and forth.
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Johnny B. Decent
Patti Mayonnaise
Had one once
Everybody's Favorite Arizonian.
Posts: 31,167
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Post by Johnny B. Decent on Jul 4, 2010 0:48:51 GMT -5
*Walks in with a slew of letters*
Bills, Gag order, legal actions from Disney, angry letter from the U.S. PTA, blah blah blah. God, 100 years ago, if a man wronged you, you could kill him no problem. Bunch of pussies all around, I tell you.
*Notices Vokuon's ramblings*
So Hillbilly, want a shot at the big time, huh? Regretfully, the WWCF doesn't want a real man as Champ., and would rather have a scum-filled c***sucker who always asks if that's the right spot when giving them a reach-around in Viva.
But hey, did you know that also The Man in Black is with us? And maybe, I'll take that belt of your hands. Give you a taste of the top of the mountain, you see. Hehheh, Amigo...buddy ol' PAL!! You can have a title shot anytime you want. As I state many times, I'm not hard to find. But you see there's just one problem, you can challenge me all you want...BUT YOU WOULD NEVER EVER BEAT ME!!! Oh sure, your a tough sob, and a CRAZY SOB!!! BUT I'M THE CRAZIEST SOB IN THE WWCF!!!! Why just ask your own Hate Machine Memebers. Blackout doesn't want anything to do with me. He was my second opponent. Just ask Square. WHEN I MADE HIM TAP OUT TO MY MANDIBLE CLAW!!!!! Or just ask your little protege...Hangman. A guy who I has head so far up his own ass THAT IT'S ACTUALLY KINDA FUNNY!!! BECAUSE I KICKED HIS ASS TOO!!!!
But to be honest Amigo, I will give you the benefit of the doubt. You would probably be the toughest test in my young career. Your a big star in the WWCF, ONE OF THE BIGGEST EVER!!! So I realize that you would be no walk in the park and a match with you would be the bloodiest and most violent match OF ALL TIME!!! But you still wouldn't beat me. And I hope you don't doubt my skills Amigo, because everyone does. And when everyone doubts me....THEY GET KILLED!!!!! So if you want a match down the road, for my belt or not. COME AND GET ME!!!! Very well, I accept your challenge.
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Post by Kris Kobain on Jul 4, 2010 23:46:32 GMT -5
Posted via Kris Kobain's Mytube
*Kris is walking into a clinic. He walks up to the receptionist.
Receptionist: "Hello sir. May I help you?" Kris: "I'm here for my urine test." Receptionist: "And what is your name?" Kris: "Seriously?" Receptionist: "Yes sir." Kris: "Kris Kobain. You might have heard of me." Receptionist (unimpressed) : "Oh yes. You're that wrestler guy. My nephew loves you. Please be seated and we'll be with you shortly."
*Kris looks into the camera as he is walking to take a seat.
Kris:"Kobainites everywhere I go."
*A few moments later a nurse comes out of the back. Nurse: "Kris!"
*Kris gets to his feet and walks to the nurse. They exchange hellos and the nurse tells him he needs to take the cup to the second door on the left. Kris goes in the bathroom and comes out a few moments later with the cup full. The nurse informs him he can wait for his results if he would like as the process only takes a couple of minutes. Kris says he'll wait. A couple minutes later the nurse hands Kris a paper with his results. He holds the paper up to the camera and the results read: Tested positive for : EXCELLENCE
Kris smiles at the camera and walks out of the clinic.
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Post by dreamwarrior on Jul 5, 2010 14:17:14 GMT -5
*Dream warrior is shown in the dressing room well folks its been a while After I lost to Kris Kobain and lost my tag partner and the 1 year anniversary of my friends death came up, I decided to take a break and train a little while. To get my head back in the game .I feel like i had let everyone down but i am back and tonight i am in a tag match. This is my golden opportunity to take a chance and run with it. I am teaming with veteran Jonathan Michaels to take on two rookies. This is my night to take the ball and run with it and I am going to let everyone know my time is now!
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jul 5, 2010 21:30:51 GMT -5
So Evil M. Here we are...again. You and me. One on one. But this time, you call the shots. Well, since that is so, I am afraid. I am terrified and don't wanna compete in the match. I am so paralyzed with fear, it's hard to even breathe. I just KNOW you are gonna pull some stunt to give you the upper-hand. You see, you may think I'm an idiot, but am not THAT much of one. When I said I have some back up I meant it. He'll be at ringside and will be on hand to deal with ANY hinders in our match. So your plan is already foiled. Don't really see the point in executing it in my opinion.
You know, I remember Yellow Jacket. Well, for the short time he was here at least. Thought he was a good guy. He even helped me against my campaign against my bestest pal, Amigo. But there was one problem with him. He thought he was better than he really was. That is where he and I differ. I KNOW I'm better than he was. You may think that is a little arrogant of me, but I think that about everyone. I have officially replaced him as the Yellow Jacket as the future of this business. Not that he was destined for that honor anyway. So on Niteraw this week, let me show you, Evil, exactly why I am what I say I am...
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Post by BoilerRoomBrawler on Jul 5, 2010 21:45:58 GMT -5
*From the Boiler Room*
BRB opens the door and walks inside. He is clearly unsure of himself.
BRB: It sure is hot in here.
BRB carefully walks down the steps.
BRB: Do I really live in here? It's a boiler room!
BRB sits down into a chair and starts pondering his lot in life. He looks over and sees his pipe wrench.
BRB: Man, that's one big, massive, pipe wrench. Yeesh.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Jul 5, 2010 23:37:38 GMT -5
*Sparks is shown walking backstage panting and sweating with Scar on his shoulder. He stops and turns to the camera.*
Ok, M. We're even now. You and I are 1 for 1. You fight dirty, I fight dirty. After all, it's only fair. So now that I have proven to you that I can best you at your own whim, do you think I can beat you for that hunk of gold on your shoulder? ... Do you?
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Post by The Hangman on Jul 6, 2010 1:09:24 GMT -5
Told you I'd win.
And very soon, I'll make it count even more in the title match. See later, hairbags.
*Walks off*
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Viva
Dennis Stamp
THAT'S MY PURSE! *kick to the groin*
You can dance if you want to.
Posts: 4,099
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Post by Viva on Jul 6, 2010 13:48:00 GMT -5
*Viva Los Bio Dome is knocking feverishly at Seth Drakin's office door. His knocks continue to go unanswered, leaving him frustrated and angry.*
I know you're in there, Drakin! You can't hide forever. What the f*** am I supposed to do with myself now. You took away my livelihood, you son of a bitch. What did I do to deserve this penalty? I deserved a rematch, and I got it. You think this is going to stand? I'm going to interfere in every WWCF Heavyweight Title match until you reinstate my ability to compete for that belt. In fact, if I were you, I'd be mighty nervous right now. You think you're so smart, unfairly treating your top star like he's the bottom of the barrel? Explain this to your f***ing sponsors, dick. I QUIT!
*Viva storms off angrily.*
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Jazzman
King Koopa
Trombone Shorty > Your Favorite Musician
Posts: 11,231
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Post by Jazzman on Jul 6, 2010 13:56:57 GMT -5
*From the Boiler Room* BRB opens the door and walks inside. He is clearly unsure of himself. BRB: It sure is hot in here. BRB carefully walks down the steps. BRB: Do I really live in here? It's a boiler room! BRB sits down into a chair and starts pondering his lot in life. He looks over and sees his pipe wrench. BRB: Man, that's one big, massive, pipe wrench. Yeesh. Jazzman sits down the hallway wondering if he should go in and talk to Brawler right now. He knocks on the door...
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smokinvokoun
Dennis Stamp
Daffy's Gonna Kill You
Posts: 4,770
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Post by smokinvokoun on Jul 6, 2010 14:04:12 GMT -5
*From the Boiler Room* BRB opens the door and walks inside. He is clearly unsure of himself. BRB: It sure is hot in here. BRB carefully walks down the steps. BRB: Do I really live in here? It's a boiler room! BRB sits down into a chair and starts pondering his lot in life. He looks over and sees his pipe wrench. BRB: Man, that's one big, massive, pipe wrench. Yeesh. Smokin Vokoun walks into the Boiler Room and then gives BRB a huge bearhug.BRB!!!! YOU ARE ALL RIGHT!!!!!!! WELCOME HOME BUDDY!!!!
*BRB just stares blankly*
Bro? Don't you know me? It's me, Smokie.
*BRB continues to stare blankly*
I'm the Hardcore Champion....I'm your Hardcore blood brother....WE'RE BOTH IN THE FAMILY FOR GOD'S SAKE!!!!
*He slaps Brawler in the face, but still the lights aren't home*
Oh crap. You don't remember me do you? Long PauseBRB: Who are you, you strange hairy man?Vokoun walks around in disbelief. He picks up BRB's pipe wrench. That son of a bitch.......THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!!! MAN IN BLACK OR WHOEVER THE HELL YOU ARE, YOU BETTER BE LISTENING TO ME!!!! BECAUSE AS I SAID BEFORE, YOU MESS WITH BOILER ROOM BRAWLER YOU MESS WITH ME!!! YOU DID THIS TO HIM AND NOW I'M GONNA DO THE SAME THING TO YOU.[/color] *He is swinging the pipe wrench wildly* YOU WILL UNDERSTAND THE TRUE MEANING OF PAIN WHEN YOU GET IN THE RING WITH ME!!!! I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!!!!! BECAUSE SMOKIN VOKOUN ISN'T JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNN!!!!!!![/color] Smokie accidentally hits BRB on the head with the Pipe Wrench, knocking him out. But Vokoun doesn't realize he did it. Thats a good idea BRB. Get a good night rest, I'll take care of The Man in Black for you.[/color] Before Vokoun leaves, he realizes he has the Pipe Wrench. He goes back and puts the pipe down next to BRB. Oh, this is yours. I got my own weapon.[/color] Vokoun runs out of the Boiler room. We see Boiler Room Brawler face first on the ground.
Fade to black
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Jul 6, 2010 14:09:41 GMT -5
*Viva Los Bio Dome is knocking feverishly at Seth Drakin's office door. His knocks continue to go unanswered, leaving him frustrated and angry.* I know you're in there, Drakin! You can't hide forever. What the f*** am I supposed to do with myself now. You took away my livelihood, you son of a bitch. What did I do to deserve this penalty? I deserved a rematch, and I got it. You think this is going to stand? I'm going to interfere in every WWCF Heavyweight Title match until you reinstate my ability to compete for that belt. In fact, if I were you, I'd be mighty nervous right now. You think you're so smart, unfairly treating your top star like he's the bottom of the barrel? Explain this to your f***ing sponsors, dick. I QUIT!*Viva storms off angrily.* Nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah nah hey hey hey goodbye!
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Viva
Dennis Stamp
THAT'S MY PURSE! *kick to the groin*
You can dance if you want to.
Posts: 4,099
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Post by Viva on Jul 6, 2010 14:17:47 GMT -5
*Viva Los Bio Dome is knocking feverishly at Seth Drakin's office door. His knocks continue to go unanswered, leaving him frustrated and angry.* I know you're in there, Drakin! You can't hide forever. What the f*** am I supposed to do with myself now. You took away my livelihood, you son of a bitch. What did I do to deserve this penalty? I deserved a rematch, and I got it. You think this is going to stand? I'm going to interfere in every WWCF Heavyweight Title match until you reinstate my ability to compete for that belt. In fact, if I were you, I'd be mighty nervous right now. You think you're so smart, unfairly treating your top star like he's the bottom of the barrel? Explain this to your f***ing sponsors, dick. I QUIT!*Viva storms off angrily.* Nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah nah hey hey hey goodbye! I'd be happy to see me go as well, especially if I spent 2 years treading water while superior superstars, like myself, step right over you to get to the top. You need the help, and now you've got it. Thank Seth.
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Jul 6, 2010 14:25:38 GMT -5
Nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah nah hey hey hey goodbye! I'd be happy to see me go as well, especially if I spent 2 years treading water while superior superstars, like myself, step right over you to get to the top. You need the help, and now you've got it. Thank Seth. Go enjoy unemployment, bitch
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Viva
Dennis Stamp
THAT'S MY PURSE! *kick to the groin*
You can dance if you want to.
Posts: 4,099
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Post by Viva on Jul 6, 2010 14:31:24 GMT -5
I'd be happy to see me go as well, especially if I spent 2 years treading water while superior superstars, like myself, step right over you to get to the top. You need the help, and now you've got it. Thank Seth. Go enjoy unemployment, bitch Keep talking, jobber. I'll make sure you never win a title for the rest of your career.
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Jul 6, 2010 14:40:40 GMT -5
Go enjoy unemployment, bitch Keep talking, jobber. I'll make sure you never win a title for the rest of your career. You already do that "wahhhhhhh Square doesn't like me, I'm gonna chat shit about him in the locker room". For crying out loud you said you quit, why the hell are you still talking?!
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Viva
Dennis Stamp
THAT'S MY PURSE! *kick to the groin*
You can dance if you want to.
Posts: 4,099
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Post by Viva on Jul 6, 2010 14:46:32 GMT -5
Keep talking, jobber. I'll make sure you never win a title for the rest of your career. You already do that "wahhhhhhh Square doesn't like me, I'm gonna chat s*** about him in the locker room". For crying out loud you said you quit, why the hell are you still talking?! For crying out loud, why do you give a shit? I mean, I'd understand if you had any vested interest in anything having to do with me, but you don't. You're just a sad f***ing loser looking for an opportunity to get himself over. You think I'm going to let you do that at my expense? Dude, you've been out of your f***ing league the second I started here. You continue to try to make yourself relevant by inserting your two cents wherever it doesn't belong. You suck not only as a wrestler, but as a human being, and frankly, you're a god damn joke. It's no wonder you call yourself a hate machine. You've never gotten any love to reciprocate. The fans hate you, the locker room hates you, and if you know what's best for you, you'll get the f*** out of my face. Honestly, I don't want to kick the shit out of you, Square. I really don't. Keep talking, though, and I'll force Seth to put us in one.
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Jul 6, 2010 15:12:21 GMT -5
You already do that "wahhhhhhh Square doesn't like me, I'm gonna chat s*** about him in the locker room". For crying out loud you said you quit, why the hell are you still talking?! For crying out loud, why do you give a s***? I mean, I'd understand if you had any vested interest in anything having to do with me, but you don't. You're just a sad f***ing loser looking for an opportunity to get himself over. You think I'm going to let you do that at my expense? Dude, you've been out of your f***ing league the second I started here. You continue to try to make yourself relevant by inserting your two cents wherever it doesn't belong. You suck not only as a wrestler, but as a human being, and frankly, you're a god damn joke. It's no wonder you call yourself a hate machine. You've never gotten any love to reciprocate. The fans hate you, the locker room hates you, and if you know what's best for you, you'll get the f*** out of my face. Honestly, I don't want to kick the s*** out of you, Square. I really don't. Keep talking, though, and I'll force Seth to put us in one. Your a hypocrite and a coward. Firstly, you shoved yourself into so SO many places you didn't belong to try and get yourself over it ended up working. CONGRATULATIONS YOU CLIMBED TO THE TOP BY BEING A DICK TO EVERYONE BACKSTAGE! And look at you claiming "Oh I'm with the fans, they hate you", thanks for the compliment the Revolution of Evolution is doing his job right, also the fans HATE YOU to no end.
Since you quit Square Vs Viva won't happen, but if it did you better believe that it would end with your head smashing against the floor after the Squareplosion
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Viva
Dennis Stamp
THAT'S MY PURSE! *kick to the groin*
You can dance if you want to.
Posts: 4,099
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Post by Viva on Jul 6, 2010 15:16:32 GMT -5
For crying out loud, why do you give a s***? I mean, I'd understand if you had any vested interest in anything having to do with me, but you don't. You're just a sad f***ing loser looking for an opportunity to get himself over. You think I'm going to let you do that at my expense? Dude, you've been out of your f***ing league the second I started here. You continue to try to make yourself relevant by inserting your two cents wherever it doesn't belong. You suck not only as a wrestler, but as a human being, and frankly, you're a god damn joke. It's no wonder you call yourself a hate machine. You've never gotten any love to reciprocate. The fans hate you, the locker room hates you, and if you know what's best for you, you'll get the f*** out of my face. Honestly, I don't want to kick the s*** out of you, Square. I really don't. Keep talking, though, and I'll force Seth to put us in one. Your a hypocrite and a coward. Firstly, you shoved yourself into so SO many places you didn't belong to try and get yourself over it ended up working. CONGRATULATIONS YOU CLIMBED TO THE TOP BY BEING A DICK TO EVERYONE BACKSTAGE! And look at you claiming "Oh I'm with the fans, they hate you", thanks for the compliment the Revolution of Evolution is doing his job right, also the fans HATE YOU to no end.
Since you quit Square Vs Viva won't happen, but if it did you better believe that it would end with your head smashing against the floor after the Squareplosion Yup. Cuz that's exactly what happened at King of Wrestlecrap, right?
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Square
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Official Ambassador
Grand Poobah of Scavenger Hunts 2011
Square-Because he looks good at all the right angles.
Posts: 18,702
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Post by Square on Jul 6, 2010 15:20:10 GMT -5
Your a hypocrite and a coward. Firstly, you shoved yourself into so SO many places you didn't belong to try and get yourself over it ended up working. CONGRATULATIONS YOU CLIMBED TO THE TOP BY BEING A DICK TO EVERYONE BACKSTAGE! And look at you claiming "Oh I'm with the fans, they hate you", thanks for the compliment the Revolution of Evolution is doing his job right, also the fans HATE YOU to no end.
Since you quit Square Vs Viva won't happen, but if it did you better believe that it would end with your head smashing against the floor after the Squareplosion Yup. Cuz that's exactly what happened at King of Wrestlecrap, right? Yeah exactly, but thanks to Naitch you didn't get pinned
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