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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:17:07 GMT -5
How are we not getting sued?!? We have reeeeeaaaalllly good lawyers.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:21:10 GMT -5
Before the crowd can react to new music filling the arena, they are greeted by Brother Devon walking out to the ring. But as usual, not normally. First of all, he is wearing an orange headband, a white polo shirt, some shades, and a toy Feast Or Fired briefcase. Second, the announcer introduced him as D-evon "The Solution" Dudley. ...... You know, this guy is reminding me of a certain gold freak up north..... that's right, we remember you. Creed. Anyway, back to today's Team 3D antics. D-evon "The Solution" Dudley is dressed almost exactly like former WCTNA wrestler Robbie E, who was fired last week due to Feast Or Fired. D-evon even does a fist pump at ringside, the crowd laughing and cheering at the same time. There is a podium set up in the middle of the ring, so it's assumed that D-evon is going to speak in honor of.... Robbie E? Why? Never mind. The next thing we know, D-evon "The Solution" Dudley is inside the ring, doing a very terrible fist pump that makes the Becky Bayless version look like Jersey Shore materiel. After that is finished, D-evon grabs the podium and lowers his shades like a bad actor winning a good award. He clears his throat, and luckily does not speak in an accent. He says:
Last week, WCTNA lost a great man. A great, great man. Last week, Robbie E was fired form WCTNA. I know, I know. You guys didn't like him two much. Some of you might be glad he's here no more. But in the minds of Team 3D, Robbie E was much then what he is to you. To Team 3D, Robbie E had a lot of potential. The problem was his cocky attitude. How he thought he was a chick magnet, and that nothing could go wrong for him. But then Feast Or Fired came and bit him right in the bum. Because of his idea that anything he touched could turn into gold, it left him unemployed. Team 3D has had countless bizarre, insulting, and disrespectful encounters with this one man. But Team 3D saw charisma in this man. He could have been thew total package. If only this man changed his ways. But because he didn't and he ended on this path, myself and my partner thought it would be mighty fine if for one night only, we paid tribute to him in honor and respect. Not because of what he was, but because of what he could have been. Thus my name and unique attire for tonight.
At this time, I would like to introduce my long time friend and partner, and one of the greatest sports and athletes of all time. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, please welcome: "BIG" BUBBA RAY!
The crowd cheers, as they await "Big" Bubba's transformation. After a few seconds he comes out, but in regular Team 3D attire. The announcing of the name gets him more confused, as well as the music. There's even a sense of fury on his face, as the crowd gives a mixed reaction to Brother Ray not going with flow. D-evon is surprised and confused at the same time, as his partner enters the ring, hands on his hips. He grabs a microphone, tapping it a couple of times for a sound check, he points at "The Solution", before starting to speak himself:
Uh...... Devon? WHAT IS THIS?
..... I thought it would be nice to pay tribute to Robbie E as respect. You know, the one who got fired?
I know who your talking about! But why should we pay tribute to that loser? He's caused us nothing but suffering the times we have talked to them!
But didn't you say you wanted to do this?
I WAS BEING SARCASTIC, YOU FOOL! I WANTED NO PART OF THIS!
Whoa, my brother! Calm down for just a minute! It's not like it's a permanent thing! It's just for one night! We come out like him, imitate him during the match, and then we never mention him again! Here, put this on:
D-evon pulls out a red headband and some yellow tipped shades, and puts him onto Brother Ray. Once he backs aways, the crowd cheers the addition.
There! Now doesn't that make you feel cool and hip, bro?
Brother Ray, now known as "Big" Bubba Ray, leans into the mic and whispers into it:
.......... I feel like a freaking idiot.
Relax. You look great. It will be alright, my brother. Just get through the match like this and we are done. Never again.
It better be.
Alrite. Listen up ere. JKO? We gonna KO you when we done with ya! Shark Boy? Ounce ya step inta the ring with us, your gonna be knocked to the floors, ya here me? OH!
Uh...... D-evon?
What's is cranking, bro?
Aren't we supposed to sound like we are form New Jersey, not form the 1950's?
Same thing, bro. Now let's F to the I to the S to the T PUMP!!!
Some tech-no music plays, as D-evon "The Solution" Dudley starts fist pumping again, "Big" Bubba Ray very slowly joining in, not with a lot of emphasis. Once the music dies down, D-evon almost high fives "Big" Bubba in the face, as they await there opponents.
JB: And their opponents, at a combined weight of 462 pounds, JKO and Shark Boy!
Team 3D v Shark Boy and JKO 3 votes 10 minutes
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Post by The Tank on Jan 23, 2011 17:23:06 GMT -5
*reads Team 3D's promo* I'm just gonna pretend that never happened. And go get the Brain Bleach. Anyway, Team 3D throw Shark Boy at JKO.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 23, 2011 17:25:54 GMT -5
Shark Boy with a leg lariat!
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,412
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Jan 23, 2011 17:29:18 GMT -5
...........
Brother Ray hits an Elbow while somewhere, Robbie E is crying.
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Jan 23, 2011 17:29:37 GMT -5
*reads Team 3D's promo* I'm just gonna pretend that never happened. And go get the Brain Bleach. Anyway, Team 3D throw Shark Boy at JKO. Once again, D-evon's idea. It could have been worse. It could have been A dance party with Gothdust, Kurrgan, and Xavier Woods. Try explaining that to him how it's not possible. "Big" Bubba Ray with a Bionic Elbow! (With a one second fist pump)
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 23, 2011 17:29:44 GMT -5
Bubba with a Jersey Shore Bellyflop!
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:38:00 GMT -5
Shark Boy goes for the Deep Sea Drop on Devon but Ray intervenes. JKO comes in but is taken out by Ray. Team 3D then hiot the 3D on Shark Boy!
1...
2...
3!
JB: Here are your winners Team 3D!
As Team 3D leave, Beer Money hit the ring and attack JKO and Shark Boy. Storm hits the Last Call on JKO and together, Beer Money hit the DWI on Shark Boy. Team 3D reenter the ring and Beer Money exit up the ramp.
Tenay: What was that about? What did Beer Money attack Shark Boy and JKO for? West: I dunno. I guess they're eliminating the competition.
*Curry Man and Spice Girl are backstage with Brooke Adams.*
Curry Man, first, congratulations on your Feast or Fired case. You know have a shot at Eric Young's X-Division Title at any time.
Thank you Brooke-chan. While Heavyweight Title would have been nice, X-Division Title always exciting.
Right. Well, you've said you want to make sure that you're worthy of this briefcase, looking to go through former X-Division Champions before cashing in your title shot. Tonight, you start this quest when you take on your fellow countryman, Kiyoshi.
Kiyoshi, unfortunately, turned his back on Nihon, and we're not so quick to welcome him back. So while I might have had an honorable match with Petey-san or Daniels-san, Kiyoshi is not someone I respect.However, there is no denying his reign as champion. Very good reign, before Daniels-san ended it. But time has passed Brooke. Daniels-san has gone, Kiyoshi has turned his back on his home country, and Curry Man is now one match way from becoming X-Division champion.
Tonight Kiyoshi, I begin to prove that I deserve this case. So that when I become X-Division Champion, I will have earned the title.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:40:28 GMT -5
JB: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Osaka, Japan, weighing 210 pounds, Kiyoshi!
JB: And his oppnent, accompanied by Spice Girl, from Japan, he's hot! he's spicy! He tastes great!
JB: Curry Man!
Curry Man v Kiyoshi 3 votes 10 minutes
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Post by The Tank on Jan 23, 2011 17:41:01 GMT -5
Curry Man with the Best Moonsault Ever.
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Oak: Certified Jade Hater
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Edgier than Wayne Brady, Harder than Chinese Arithmetic, and Higher than the ratings for Blade: The Series
TOP ROPE CATCH A VIBE YEAH I SWERVE WHEN I DRIVE
Posts: 15,412
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Post by Oak: Certified Jade Hater on Jan 23, 2011 17:41:09 GMT -5
Curry Man with 21 Flavors.
OF PAIN!!
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lodirulz
Hank Scorpio
Live as the color red in a world of black and white.
Posts: 6,412
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Post by lodirulz on Jan 23, 2011 17:46:07 GMT -5
Three things:
1: (Uses Men In Black memory eraser) There. That will get that Team 3D promo out of your head.
2: PN, there's a PM for you. I need some advice on future plans.
3: Curry Man with a Spice Rack, followed by one form Spice Girl.
I think she did the better one.... Hubba Hubba!
BE QUIET YOU!
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:50:05 GMT -5
Fun Fact: Curry Man is the only Feast or Fired winner to win his match tonight.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:52:33 GMT -5
Kiyoshi comes off the top rope but Curry Man catches him and hits the Spice Rack!
1...
2...
3!
JB: Here is your winner, Curry Man!
Tenay: And the masked man from the Orient picks up the win here. West: And you gotta wonder when he's gonna use that briefcase.
*in a secluded backstage area, Kaz sits in a chair*
Once upon a Midnight Dreary While I pondered weak and weary... Came a thought into my head; Surely Raven, you must Jest As between us two, I am the best Lest you see a light corrupted by the Dead.
Raven. Ever since last week, when I found out I would be facing you, I have studied you. I know how extreme you can get and I know how maniacal you can be.
Yet you speak in nothing but Riddles spoken by a nut Waiting for Blood and Gore That is that.....and nothingmore.
Tonight, I prove to the doubters why I deserve my spot in The Chosen. Tonight Raven, you won't get into my head, because in the end, I will be standing proudly while you cower in defeat
Quote Kazarian......Nevermore
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:55:20 GMT -5
Raven is backstage. We can only see his face, but it is clear that he is looking down at something.
Beautiful.
Perfect in every way.
He looks up at the camera.
Kaz.
I’m sure the question on your mind is…
Why?
Why you?
Raven looks back down.
Oh man.
He looks back up at the camera.
Well the answer is very simple.
He looks back down.
Very nice.
Yep, that’s the stuff right there.
Raven looks back up at the camera.
Why not you?
See, Kaz.
You have the unfortunate distinction of not only being a member of Immortal…
But also of being a man who has betrayed me in the past.
So for you Kaz…
Raven quickly glances down, then back up.
For you Kaz, it’s a no-win situation.
For while nobody will ever mistake me for a man of compassion…
I can be merciful at times.
But not to you.
Oh no.
Tonight Kaz, allow me to welcome you to hell.
Where the only rules…
Are Raven’s Rules.
Raven stands up and we hear something drop to the floor.
Quoth the Raven.
Nevermore.
Raven walks away as the camera pans down, revealing…
Christy Hemme’s Playboy spread.
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Post by Perpetual Nirvana on Jan 23, 2011 17:58:45 GMT -5
JB: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, representing The Chosen, from Anaheim, California, weighing 215 pounds, Kazarian!
JB: And his opponent, from The Bowery, weighing 245 pounds, Raven!
Raven v Kazarian 3 votes 10 minutes
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Post by Deleted on Jan 23, 2011 18:00:43 GMT -5
Raven with a suplex!
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Post by The Tank on Jan 23, 2011 18:01:50 GMT -5
Kazarian with a Mr. Coffee.
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Post by Yamashita Enforcement Division on Jan 23, 2011 18:01:54 GMT -5
Raven with a DDT.
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Post by Deleted on Jan 23, 2011 18:02:16 GMT -5
Kazarian with the wave of the future
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