El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Jan 24, 2011 1:49:29 GMT -5
There hasn't been one on here for a while, so why not? "MACHETE"The beloved trailer from "Grindhouse" is now it's own movie. Plot: Illegal immigrant Machete has been hired to shoot the Governor of Texas, only to find out that he's been set up. Now he's out to get revenge and take down the real bad guys. If they had left it at that, then I would have been happy. Instead, they added two extra villains, politics and not one but two love interests. To me, it felt like they overloaded the story with so much crazy action stuff that the fun was lost. They over-overdid it. It's not all bad. Trejo is as badass as he needed to be, and Seagal was pretty damn good as the drug lord. In fact, all of the performances were good, it's just that there were too many of them. I loved the fact that DeNiro was in it, but his part as the Governor should have been just a cameo and little more. So, yeah, my problem was the story. They should have started the movie the way the trailer started, with Machete being hired to shoot, and run the story from there. Having the prelude with Seagal may have set up the bad blood between them and final fight, but it revealed something that would have been MUCH cooler in the middle of the movie. Plus, another complaint: {Spoiler}Michelle Rodriguez should have died, and Jessica Alba should have taken her place as She'. That's where I thought they were going with that, and I am sorely disappointed that they didn't. Don't get me wrong, it's OK, but it's not the slice of awesomeness that the original trailer promised.
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Post by YAKMAN is ICHIBAN on Jan 24, 2011 10:23:30 GMT -5
I just watched 1997's "Fierce Creatures" starring John Cleese, Jamie Lee Curtis and Kevin Kline. Michael Palin in a supporting role.
"A massive corporate conglomerate, Octopus Inc., run by a shrewd and cruel tycoon named Rod McCain, purchases a UK-based leisure company, and also the failing London Marwood Zoo. To bring more business to the zoo, Octopus hires a new manager, Rollo Lee, who promptly comes up with a way to increase profits-do away with all the animals except for the ferocious ones. This new Fierce Creatures Policy shocks the Marwood zookeepers, led by the unendingly talkative Adrian "Bugsy" Malone. Eventually, Rod McCain's son Vince, along with the up-and-coming business executive Willa Weston, take control of the zoo and revoke the Fierce Creatures Policy. Vince instead comes up with many under-handed and vicious schemes to attract customers-unauthorized celebrity endorsements, shoddy, overpriced zoo merchandise, and using robotic animals instead of real ones. However, Vince is also stealing from the zoo's funds..."
I'd highly recommend it. It is a very fun comedy. Cleese and Kline are both in top form here.
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bob
Backup Wench
The "other" Bob. FOC COURSE!
started the Madness Wars, Proudly the #1 Nana Hater on FAN
Posts: 80,586
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Post by bob on Jan 24, 2011 14:49:33 GMT -5
{Spoiler}
Saw 3-D is a film in the Saw series in name only. During the opening credits we see Dr. Gordon from the original Saw film after he sawed off his foot, which immediately gave away the so-called big swerve at the end.
Granted, I figured out that eventually he would be a Saw follower for lack of a better word, but to give it away literally seconds into the film is bulls*** and angered me immensely.
the lack of Jigsaw perplexed me given how prominent he was in the other films, especially after he died in 3
Unless I'm mistaken Jigsaw was in the film for only 3 scenes for a total of 3 minutes at the most.
Most of the film was "cat and mouse" between Hoffman and Jill, now granted I thought it was a pretty cool swerve that Hoffman ended up being in the coroners bag to sneak into the police headquarters undetected.
Aside from that the film was predictable. There are no smooth transitions from scenes to what is more like "oh look someone is about to die" in the "games" before the main one following the fake survivor and even then the final "test" was predictable.
Honestly, this movie was a massive gorefest with none of the philosophy that was in previous Saw films.
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Jan 31, 2011 1:39:17 GMT -5
"THE HOUSE OF THE DEVIL"Story: cute college chick in need of quick cash takes emergency job of babysitting the mother of an odd couple who live in a big house in the country. This is the kind of movie that they don't make anymore... one where the slow build of suspense is more important than grossing the audience out. And, when a bit of gore does happen, it's more of a legitimate shock. Slow moving early on, but there's this feeling like there's something happening just outside of the picture frame that's just not right. As the protagonist pokes around the house, she uncovers little clues that all is not truthful with the house owners. All actors do a great job here... the main character looks like a very yougn (and damn cute) Margot Kidder, and the strange couple are wonderfully/spookily done by Tom Noonan ("Manhunter", "RoboCop 2") and cult classic favorite Mary Woronov ("Death Race 2000", "Rock'N'Roll High School"). Highly recommended for fans of 70's and 80's horror classics like "Halloween".
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Post by YAKMAN is ICHIBAN on Jan 31, 2011 10:24:18 GMT -5
Want to crap your pants? Countdown to Zero is a documentary about the danger of nuclear weapons. It highlights the threat posed by the possibility of nuclear terrorism, how easy it theoretically is for them to build or acquire one, the threat posed by accidents with our own weapons, and several incidents where we came VERY close to total nuclear annihilation. Features interviews with Ex-CIA Agent Valerie Plame, Mikhail Gorbachev, Tony Blair, Robert McNamara, and several nuclear scientists and ex-military men. This is not a tree-hugging anti-nuclear power movie - this is the people with their fingers on the button telling you how palpable the danger of nuclear weaponry is. Used as a central theme is Kennedy's quote, "Every man, woman and child lives under a nuclear sword of Damocles, hanging by the slenderest of threads, capable of being cut at any moment by accident, or miscalculation, or by madness." This movie will make you realize just how true that statement is. Available on Netflix Instant Play
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Feb 7, 2011 1:48:44 GMT -5
"PIRANHA" (2010)Story: party time goes horribly wrong when an ancient species of piranha gets loose in a lake during Spring Break. This film was a heck of a lot of fun. Not scary in the least, but a big gory mess of laughs. The special effects of the fish, the acting, everything was enjoyably over-the-top (especially the appearance of Christopher Lloyd, local fish expert). This was like a movie version of a giant cheese pizza... not very good for you but damn fun getting through it. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------- "FORCE: FIVE"Story: special forces team is hired to rescue the daughter of a wealthy man from a cult run by a martial arts religious leader. Basically, this movie is "Bruce Lee (and friends) vs. Reverend Jim Jones" as former karate champion Joe Lewis leads his team of multi-ethnic fighters (African-American, Mexican, Australian, woman and crazy) against the martial arts zealots lead by Master Bong Soo Han (aka "The Father of Hapkido"). There are several scenes that are direct steals from "Enter the Dragon" (the opening with Lewis walking through the woods, Lewis sneaking around the compound, and especially the final fight, with 'room of smoke' subbing for 'hall of mirrors'), but that's probably all right because the guy who directed this was Robert Clouse, who also directed "EtD". Pretty average, with a few bright spots from supporting cast fighters Richard Norton and Benny "The Jet" Urquidez (his movie debut).
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Feb 14, 2011 0:41:36 GMT -5
"Ms. 45"Story: Thana is a mute seamstress who is raped at gunpoint twice in one day, once walking home from work and the second when she gets home and finds a burglar. Thana manages to kill the burglar by hitting him in the head with an iron, and then tries to get rid of the body by cutting it into pieces and spreading it around New York City. When she 'drops' a bag in a garbage pile, a random New Yorker tries to return the bag to her... only to be shot because Thana thinks he's another rapist. She starts dressing more provocatively and going out at night, looking for revenge... Low budget but very well made movie by Abel Ferrara ("King of New York", "Bad Lieutenant"). The film plays out like a mash-up of a slasher flick and a feminist version of "Death Wish". You understand why she's doing what she does, but she goes WAY too far. Zoe Tamerlis plays Thana nicely as a wallflower early on, then slowly morphing into a sexier New Wave-looking babe (to me, she looked like she fell out of Robert Palmer's "Addicted To Love" music video). It must have been difficult to play a mute, but she was able to project what the character was thinking without making it look like she was trying to. Good role that was well done. All of the men who appear come across as misogynistic jerks, especially her boss. The worst performance is by the landlady, a truly annoying character who you almost wish would get killed just so that you don't have to listen to her anymore... and her little yappy dog, too. What I didn't like about the movie was the soundtrack. There's a jazzy/rock saxophone that plays as Thana descends into her madness, that's repeated over and over and over and over and over and over again until you just want to strangle the player. (Continuity error: the band at the costume party is playing 'her' annoying song, but the musician is playing a trumpet and not a saxophone). Recommended.
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Post by Michael Coello on Feb 17, 2011 19:50:32 GMT -5
I rented the Asylum's version of Sherlock Holmes, after spending about a half hour trying to find it. I decided to check it out, from a few recommendations. In short: it's good. It's an interesting movie, and I don't get why Ben Snyder gets flack, as I found him good in the role as Holmes. Really, him and Watson are good, especially with their chemistry when they're together. It's also interesting to see the villain, even though he's only in about the last third of the movie, as he's pretty good. The effects are good, too, even though the gore effects aren't up to snuff, mostly the blood splatters after the monster attacks, the two times it's seen. Also, the opening cameras work was ugly. I know it's an attack on a ship, but it got me dizzy to watch with all the shakey cam. However, those don't take away from the film, as it's interesting once you're introduced to Homes and Watson. I think it's worth a viewing, or a rental, as it's 2.99 at Blockbuster.
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Y2M
Dennis Stamp
Posts: 4,757
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Post by Y2M on Feb 17, 2011 21:03:36 GMT -5
'Children of Men'Starring: Clive Owen, Julianne Moore, Michael Caine One of the best, if not the best, science fiction film of the 2000's. The poster is pretty self-explanatory in terms of plot, and it was based on the book. Once it starts it doesn't let up, the action scenes are great, the cinematography is outstanding, the acting is brilliant. It makes you think about life and death, and it is portrayed through the characters journey. I would recommend this movie to anybody and everybody. I can't give it less than four stars.
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Post by Michael Coello on Feb 17, 2011 23:49:44 GMT -5
Okay, here's another, as I had rented 2 other movies today, "Wild Wild West" and "Reindeer Games". Both movies I enjoyed the first time I saw them years back, and I'm gonna see if they hold up. I'll get to WWW later, but here's Reindeer Games. In short: Hasn't held up for me. The movie is about Ben Affleck, named Rudy, who is caught up in a scheme to rob a casino by a group of thugs lead by the brother of this woman who his cellmate kept in contact with inside the pen, and who he took on his persona after the cellmate died. This all ends up being fake, after about 6 different twists and swerves change it to the point where I just don't care. Affleck himself isn't that good here, but it's not too bad. Also nice to see Danny Trejo get work, too. His early scene of "Christmas 2" made me laugh. Crap, that's what Machete needed, talking about Christmas 2 instead of Immigration. Everyone else is pretty forgettable. Theron would be part of that, too, except she gets naked, and it's hard to forget that happening. Still, her character is just lame until the last part of the movie, but it's not really enough to salvage it. Really, the story wouldn't be so bad, but they just kept throwing twists in there until it broke it. See, the movie would have been fine if they stopped before the last one. That last one was not needed, just brought the whole movie down, and didn't even matter that much in the end. Seriously, you could have finished the movie about 5 minutes earlier without that twist, without sacrificing a damn thing. Ehh, I'll give it 2 stars, one star for each of Charlize Theron's nude scenes, which I'm pretty sure is the only reason most people watched it in the first place.
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Feb 21, 2011 2:14:34 GMT -5
"GALAXY OF TERROR"Story: sent to a distant planet by their leader "The Master" to find survivors of a crashed ship, the crew of Quest find a giant pyramid and then something starts killing off the crew... A cult classic, and deservedly so. THE James Cameron was second unit director and production designer for this. The story is pretty much a rip-off of "Alien", but they turn it into a more psychological thriller version of the same idea. That is, they TRY to... the whole wrap-up/reveal at the end of he movie feels rushed and not very well explained, in a "holy-crap-we-have-to-get-this-done-right-now" kind of way. While the monsters do have that 50's guy-in-a-rubber-suit look to them, the sets and the whole look of the movie is incredible. It is truly amazing what this crew did with the amount of money they had. The acting... well, the leads were average (Edward Albert Jr. and "Happy Days" Erin Moran in the only role I can remember that isn't Chachi-related), and the secondary characters are played by some great actors and may have interesting backgrounds but aren't on the screen long enough to get into. Sid Haig (Captain Spaulding in "The Devil's Rejects") is a mute warrior who uses only crystal throwing stars... never explained why. Robert Englund (pre-"A Nightmare on Elm Street" and pre-TV's "V") is a tech who hates himself... no reason. The team leader hates Albert's character, the pilot of the Quest survived a big disaster, the lady tech is afraid of sex, the mission leader, the cook, the rookie... they all have back stories but they are touched on so lightly that you question why they mentioned it in the first place. The documentary is very nice, with interviews of much of the cast and crew (sadly, Mr. Cameron did not participate, but iconic producer Roger Corman did), and it's great hearing the stories about how they filmed the "giant maggot" scene, how they made the sets (used MacDonald's styrofoam containers stolen from garbage bins to line the hallways of the spaceship), how the effects were done, etc. All in all, a movie that does deserve it's cult status. Bad, yes. Fun... yes. Also, it is worth seeing this to compare to "Aliens"... Recommended.
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Post by YAKMAN is ICHIBAN on Feb 21, 2011 9:58:29 GMT -5
Just saw "The Green Hornet"
If it wasn't written by AND starring Seth Rogen, it might have stood a chance. It was a very self-indulgent script, and the whole film suffered as a result. I'd dare say it is the worst film I've sen in theaters since The Last Airbender.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 21, 2011 14:29:58 GMT -5
Ah yes, people are thinking seeing this that I seem to be a little masochistic right now that I watched this. Well, i'm here to tell you that it's not the most awful thing i've seen in my life. It's not to say it's still bad, right? Actually, that's also true. It's not terrible, it's just completely forgettable and just not good. Nothing more, nothing less. Guess I need to remind you of the plot: New neighbors decide to take RVD and his wife out on the town. Things go rocky though when the drug-addled brother of the club owner tries to rape RVD's wife. In an act of self-defense though, when RVD tries to help, he accidentally kills the kid. Pissed off that he "killed" his brother, he puts out a $100,000 bounty on RVD's head. I think that's more money than he was paid in ECW. (Hi-yo! I'll quit while i'm ahead) To be honest, I think that Rob Van Dam and hell, even Batista didn't do terrible. It's not like they're going to be in the Bad Acting Hall of Fame. The rest of the characters though, including the main villain though...UGH! The main villain comes from the "I'M SO ANGRY!" acting department (although I get it, they killed his brother, blah blah...he's still yelling even when he's talking about something else). He's just bad. And oh yeah, I wish I could get paychecks for standing around in shades (in the dark, mind you), doing nothing like Marrese Crump got to do. I'd be a millionaire. Like I said, it's not a terrible movie...well, you can argue about whether or not it is based off the final act alone... {Spoiler}Throughout the entire movie, it kind of hits you that this seems to be pretty much a straight ripoff of the 1993 cult hit Judgement Night. And that's the case...UNTIL RVD'S DAUGHTER IS KIDNAPPED! Earlier in the movie, they mentioned that RVD's character was an ex-Navy Seal, like that had anything to do with the movie. When his daughter his kidnapped, RVD goes into full-on BAMF role (complete...with shades...IN THE FREAKIN' DARK AGAIN!) and BOOM! This movie is now pretty much a straight ripoff of Commando.
And the main villain who kidnapped her, decides to throw us a swerve straight out of Dickens...the brother that RVD accidentally killed...IT WAS HIS SON! WHOA! DIDN'T SEE THAT COMING! No, really, I didn't see it coming, because it was A STUPID SWERVE! Like, "Big Lipped Alligator Moment" stuff here.
Yeah... So yeah, in short. The acting was okay at best, but everything else was just mediocre. Like, this isn't even a "so bad it's entertainingly funny" way. It's just blah! ** out of ***** It's worth a ** though just for Ja Rule's part in the film. Yep...mild spoiler. Even though he's featured on the box art, he's only in the movie for all of 3 minutes.
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Cranjis McBasketball
Crow T. Robot
Knew what the hell that thing was supposed to be
Peace Love and Nothing But
Posts: 42,388
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Post by Cranjis McBasketball on Feb 23, 2011 16:55:28 GMT -5
Better when it was called Planes, Trains and Automobiles. That said, still some funny enough scenes, just not amazing. Worth renting if nothing else is on, but if you have PTA, just watch that instead.
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Feb 28, 2011 1:40:58 GMT -5
"FORBIDDEN WORLD" (aka "MUTANT") Another "Alien" rip-off, this time a trouble-shooter is sent to a remote science base to stop an experiment that has gone wrong and escaped. While the hero has sex with the hot female doctor, the mutating monster sneaks around the base killing the others, until the secret of the monster is revealed... it's part human DNA. Another notorious cheaply made film by producer Roger Corman, filled with sets and scenes from other movies (the opening, which has NOTHING to do with the rest of the story, uses sets from "Galaxy of Terror" AND space battle scenes from "Battle Beyond The Stars"), gory effects and bad acting. There's also a gratuitous sex scene and an odd two-woman shower scene... odd because it happens RIGHT after a monster kill, when the mood just does not scream "Hey, it's shower time!" Not as good as "Galaxy of Terror", mainly because the film is so dark that you can't really see what's going on. There's lots of people running (actually walking... during scenes where time is of the essence, there's a lot of people just strolling to or from their doom) through dark hallways lined with egg cartons and discarded fast food Styrofoam containers. There's also lots of shaky-camera happening when there's an attack. The gory bits are appropriately disgusting, though. Whatever money they had must have gone to the blood-and-guts department and they used their money well. Note: there's a death scene in this movie that may have influenced the Japanese genre of hentai tentacle... well, you know. OK, the movie is bad, but the kind of bad that you can turn your brain off and just laugh at. Again, not as good as "Galaxy of Terror" but still fun. The Shout Factory DVD has two versions on separate DVDs, the theatrical 78-minute cut that has been BEAUTIFULLY remastered and the unrated 82-minute director's cut ("MUTANT") that looks like it was transferred from a video tape. I watched the unrated version.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Feb 28, 2011 10:53:12 GMT -5
Up: Just watched it for the first time last night and I don't get what all the hullabaloo was all about. Nice flick, don't get me wrong, but I really didn't think it was all that impressive as it was fairly Disney-trite and predictable. The dog, Dug, was hilarious though. My favorite part of the film by leaps and bounds.
Freakanomics (the movie): I've never read the book, but it was an interesting look at how math can be used to for observable real world pattern recognition and causation. It kind of dragged a bit with the sumo section, but there were some very interesting bits about the declining US crime rate in the 90's and incentivizing grades.
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Mar 7, 2011 1:36:10 GMT -5
"STARCRASH"A low-budget Italian rip-off of "Star Wars" that is so mind-numbingly bad that it's funny. - A story that looks like it was written by 10-year old fans of George Lucas - A Jedi-like character with magical powers (including seeing the future and raising the dead) that has no history, no explaination and just chooses to die when he could have prevented it {Spoiler}Seriously, this character is so over-powered he could have solved the problem of the ENTIRE MOVIE just by speaking up... - over-acting by the bucketload - inept special effects, including stop-motion robots that move in slow motion - David Hasselhoff This movie was so awesomely bad, I think I brained my damage...
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Post by Back to being Cenanuff on Mar 7, 2011 7:07:26 GMT -5
Gnomeo and Juliet: I saw this yesterday with my son. He's 5. He was bored with it after 45 minutes. It was full of not-so-clever Shakespeare references and Elton John music. Everything that is wrong with Western cinema is in this movie. Dated pop culture references, visual gags that fall flat, a Hulk Hogan voice over. I want my 90 minutes back.
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Mar 14, 2011 1:05:12 GMT -5
"DAY OF THE ANIMALS"A group of hikers in the mountains are stalked and killed by the animals, who appear to be working together. Not bad, but not great. One of the "nature gone wild" craze that happened in the 70's, this time blaming the depletion of the ozone layer in driving the animals crazy or something. The acting is pretty standard, except for a pre-"Airplane" Leslie Nielsen who goes over the top playing an alpha-male jerk who argues with the leader (Christopher George) and ends up going his own way (note: that does not end well). For the most part, the animals themselves are not bad when on screen, but some of the attacks come off as silly... the dog attack where the dogs just look like they're playing, the flying rat attack (which almost made me laugh out loud), and the Nielsen vs. bear fight where he looks like he's wrestling with a giant rug. Average. Not worth seeking out but if it's on TV and there's nothing else, not bad. Oh, and I picked it up because it was in the Bargain Bin for $3. The package says "Digitally Remastered"... which is definately a case of false advertising. It looks like it was transfered directly from VHS. There's also a gallery that has blurry screen captures of apparently random scenes.
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El Pollo Guerrera
Grimlock
His name has chicken in it, and he is good at makin' .gifs, so that's cool.
Status: Runner
Posts: 14,894
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Post by El Pollo Guerrera on Mar 21, 2011 1:14:55 GMT -5
"THE HOWLING"TV female news anchor is attacked by a serial killer who is shot by the police. Her psychiatrist sends her and her husband to The Colony, a private resort for his patients. And then her husband is bitten by something in the woods... something not human... A nice updating of the classic werewolf tale (well, updated for the late 70's/early 80's, that is). Some great special effects for the time, including a very well done on-screen transformation from human to werewolf. All of the actors hit the right notes, as well. Nobody seems to be overdoing their roles... no hams on screen. Lots of familiar faces show up... Slim Pickens as the local sheriff, John Carradine as an elderly patient/local, Kevin McCarthy as a TV producer, Dick Miller as a book store owner, and an unrecognizable Robert Picardo (The Doctor from "Star Trek: Voyager") as the serial killer. Recommended.
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