Ultimo Gallos
Grimlock
Dreams SUCK!Nightmares live FOREVER!
Posts: 14,363
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Post by Ultimo Gallos on Jan 28, 2021 8:12:16 GMT -5
Visitors of the Night-This is kinda sorta a horror film. Made for TV in 1995. I had never heard of it. Then saw the DVD cover with Markie Post and Candace Cameron,plus it being under a buck,took a chance on it. Markie is a single mom raising her bratty daughter,Candace. Stephen McHattie is the father,who barely appears in the film.And one of the victims from Jason X plays Candace's best friend.
Markie keeps having dreams with piles of lights and a young girl being abducted by aliens. One night when Markie isn't home Candace throws a big party. After the party gets out of control,Cameron walks a full trash can up to where it is picked up. She sees some lights. And next thing she has lost her jacket,is back at her home and hours have passed.
While the budget is low,it is obviously filmed in Canada,it is much better than the made for TV Science Fiction films you get currently. The only DVD of it is Out of Print. Thankfully the entire film is up on Youtube.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Jan 30, 2021 2:47:58 GMT -5
Guinea Pig 3: Shudder! The Man Who Never Dies* *DVD* While still gory this is a extreme step down from its predecessor. The comic value is amped up and I prefer an extreme mind-f*** like the second one (which is where I’ve heard the series peaked, I’ll know soon enough). Tbh, this part sucked to the point where I was going to watch part 4 right afterwards but I needed something different (even though I’m sure part 4 was very different).
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Jan 30, 2021 3:44:29 GMT -5
Sledge* *Tubi* This movie both sucked and was great. The campers were such annoying people. Like, the “campers” are always annoying but this was a different level of annoying. And the girls were d-level playing a-level. The killer though, his one-liners and the fact that he sledged all them was hilarious and wicked. But man was getting there torture. Like, I was about to jump into the movie. The sexual one-liners were killing me. So final verdict... ...watch a Jason movie. Even Jason Goes to Hell. That’s way better.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Jan 31, 2021 2:53:30 GMT -5
Guinea Pig 4 (or 6, no one’s really sure): Devil Woman Doctor* *dvd* This was another comedic instalment but it was much more enjoyable than part 3 because it was so completely f***ed up. A “doctor” presents case studies of patients she’s studying which include a family who’s heads explode when they’re upset (including the baby), a man with a Jeckyl Hyde dual personality which cause him bodily harm, a dude with a mutated face growing out of his stomach, classy cannibal buffet, a man slowly becoming a zombie, a dismembered brain or guts or something (I couldn’t really tell) that chases a girl through a subway station, a man who sweats blood, a man with a tattoo that has started moving around his body and shape shifting that he wants removed (the “doctor” misses quite a few times and he ends up with no skin, but no tattoo!) and finally four guys sitting on a rooftop comparing diseases (one guy’s decomposing from the inside out and vomits eggs full of puke and an alien, ones body is stretching and his poop is alive and violent, one has the air he breaths leaking from his body and his tongue turns into a pigeon, and the last his heart movies moves around inside his body from head to toe and another highly contagious disease that causes him to become cuckoo). It ends with everyone getting nail boards in the faces, including the crew. Yeah this one was totally f***ed up. One of the most f***ed it things I’ve seen in some time. The first two Guinea Pigs were vile, the third one was stupid but this was just Japan being Japan. The zombie one could (and I’ve seen similar movies where it has) be made into a feature length.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Jan 31, 2021 3:49:16 GMT -5
Great White (aka the Last Shark)* *Tubi* I could swear I’ve seen this movie before... ... Another movie in a long line of movies leeching off the popularity of a far superior film released a few years earlier. This one was pretty shameless in its...”homagity”. Gotta love the poor mans Quint and the similar but not similar enough storyline of a politician who won’t shit the beach down. Although it wasn’t not similar enough to not get the producers sued and the movie pulled from theatres. The politician here did at least take measures to stop the shark attacks. But he wasn’t stopping that windsurfing competition. It did have the same voice actor dubbing that’s in every 1980’s Italian horror movie I watch (I know it as “Brian’s voice in Zombie Flesh Eaters) and the one female voice that I can best call “lead female from every 1980’s Italian horror movie voice”. Hearing those voices always gives me a warm feeling, even if it’s never the same actors getting dubbed with them. It’s really too bad the gore was minimal. Had they done something comparable to even just Alien Contamination or a lesser of the Italian gore movies I’d have probably liked it better than Jaws, for the fun and nothing more. But it wasn’t even PG-13. And that’s too bad because I actually enjoyed this. Too bad there wasn’t any nudity either because the girls in this were way hotter than the girls in Jaws.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 1, 2021 4:37:24 GMT -5
WrestleMassacre *Tubi* A simpleton gardener has dreams of becoming a professional wrestler like his father but after a particularly bad tryout, losing his job and constant insults from everyone around him he loses it and gets his revenge. This spent WAY to long to get going (almost an hour until he finally started getting his revenge) and was WAY too long. But it had a lot of comic charm (both on purpose and inadvertent, loved the greasy bleach blonde thug), some trailer trash “Gathering of the Juggalos” nudity, a brutal slam death metal soundtrack, the fastest day-to-night transition in the history of film and some healthy gore. Plus the acting chops of professional wrestlers Sandman, Tony Atlas, Renee Dupree, Jimmy Valiant and Nikolai Volkoff. There’s a subplot with Rene Dupree being a war veteran or something that really served no purpose. He got a sex scene thought that was about as awkward as the ones Jean a Claude Van Damn or Steven Segal had in their prime movies. It’s really just too bad that the first hour was so slow and the entire movie was too long (an hour and forty minutes). It would have been really easy to cut thirty minutes of pointless subplots from the movie and just focus on the very Bruiser Brody-like lead (who wasn’t really even the lead) humorously and graphically killing people with Mandible Claws, Arm Wretches and Camel Clutches. There really was two movies going on here: the wrestler and this couple who owe some goons some money. The entire part of the couple could go and this would be a “10”. Oh, he uses a chair. And he throws a guy off a ladder through a table. It’s a 10.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 3, 2021 4:56:07 GMT -5
PMS Cop* *DVD* This one had all the tools to be awesome but it never worked out. It could have been campy and funny but it wasn’t. There could have been tons of great gore effects but there was barely any. I was very disappointed by this one. The best part was PMS Cop ripping some dudes jaw off but that was in the first half an hour. The rest was her transforming into a less hot version of herself (via another actress who looked like Marilyn Manson) terrorizing the lab that created the drug which transformed her into an unstoppable killing machine. Very reminiscent of Terminator (the synth soundtrack didn’t hurt) but like I said with this silly concept it could have been so much fun but they went for serious-ish.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 5, 2021 5:20:12 GMT -5
Destroyer (1988) *tubi* I love movies that involve electrical theory and get it so wrong. This one looked and felt really cool. The guy who played the killer was f***ing incredible and the scenarios that played out were awesome. It was really, really slow. Everything that should have happened over the course of its 90 minutes happened in a quick ten minutes. But for some odd reason that didn’t matter. I guess it’s one of those rare ones that actually did a good job of building the characters. Who knew those existed in low budget horror? But sadly it just wasn’t gory enough. It could have been on the level of Argentos ‘Demons’ (because for some reason I kept thinking of that movie while I watched it) but the violence was kept to a hard PG-13 level. Still a worthwhile lost 1980’s gem. I enjoyed it.
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Post by KAMALARAMBO: BOOMSHAKALAKA!!! on Feb 5, 2021 7:57:40 GMT -5
Destroyer (1988) *tubi* I love movies that involve electrical theory and get it so wrong. This one looked and felt really cool. The guy who played the killer was f***ing incredible and the scenarios that played out were awesome. It was really, really slow. Everything that should have happened over the course of its 90 minutes happened in a quick ten minutes. But for some odd reason that didn’t matter. I guess it’s one of those rare ones that actually did a good job of building the characters. Who knew those existed in low budget horror? But sadly it just wasn’t gory enough. It could have been on the level of Argentos ‘Demons’ (because for some reason I kept thinking of that movie while I watched it) but the violence was kept to a hard PG-13 level. Still a worthwhile lost 1980’s gem. I enjoyed it. I always loved the poster for this, but don’t think I ever actually saw the movie.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 5, 2021 17:13:00 GMT -5
Destroyer (1988) *tubi* I love movies that involve electrical theory and get it so wrong. This one looked and felt really cool. The guy who played the killer was f***ing incredible and the scenarios that played out were awesome. It was really, really slow. Everything that should have happened over the course of its 90 minutes happened in a quick ten minutes. But for some odd reason that didn’t matter. I guess it’s one of those rare ones that actually did a good job of building the characters. Who knew those existed in low budget horror? But sadly it just wasn’t gory enough. It could have been on the level of Argentos ‘Demons’ (because for some reason I kept thinking of that movie while I watched it) but the violence was kept to a hard PG-13 level. Still a worthwhile lost 1980’s gem. I enjoyed it. I always loved the poster for this, but don’t think I ever actually saw the movie. There was never a jackhammer with a laser-scope
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 6, 2021 3:08:56 GMT -5
Monster Shark* (aka Devil Fish aka Shark aka Monster from the Red Ocean aka Devouring Waves aka Shark: Red in the Ocean aka It’s probably easiest to just Google “Lamberto Bava Shark movie 1984”) *dvd* I do love me Lamberto Bavas movies and this definitely had all the pieces. Some great 1980’s Italian gore, the same voice dubbing I’m all to familiar with, that poppy music and some great scenery. It’s too bad that it was a little on the slow side. If it was a blood-bath it would have been incredible. Instead it’s just really good. Also, a wonderful precursor to Sharktopus!
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Post by KAMALARAMBO: BOOMSHAKALAKA!!! on Feb 6, 2021 9:24:07 GMT -5
I always loved the poster for this, but don’t think I ever actually saw the movie. There was never a jackhammer with a laser-scope
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 7, 2021 2:46:17 GMT -5
Unmasked part 25* *Tubi* I had really high hopes for this but it was sadly just not that good. A horror comedy of a Jason-esc killer meeting a blind woman who loves him for what’s inside could have been hilarious. This was not. It wasn’t honestly more drama than comedy. Some good gore though.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 10, 2021 4:08:21 GMT -5
Flowers* *DVD* Wow, this was a f***ed up trip. An arty journey of six dead women who travel darkened hallways to view the scenes of the deaths. Along the way they meet a lot of blood, guts, excrement, corpses, filth and a pig carcass. Filth. That’s the best word for this movie. Not because it was disgusting and I found it offensive but because everything is just covered in filth. Much like Nine Inch Nails’ ‘Closer’ music video but the intensity turned up to “1,000,000”. I loved it. It had the perfect runtime for a movie like this and never dragged. It was less than 80 minutes and each girl was featured for about ten to fifteen. It was completely void of dialogue too but had such great sound editing that you felt every squish. The themes of vanity and gluttony play a prevalent role. Truly a work of art and not for the weak stomached. But perfect for fans of David Lynch and surreal film. Unearthed Films has become my favourite distributor. I don’t think I’ve come across a movie from them that hasn’t f***ed my head up.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 12, 2021 3:47:19 GMT -5
Rats: Night of Terror* *dvd* I watch so many bad movies but this one was especially stupid. So much stupid. The stupidest of which is the concept. But the characters; they’re so f***ing dumb. So I obviously really liked it. The characters were all given enough time to allow them to stick out individually, even to the point where I didn’t want to see most of them die (a rarity in horror movies). That comes at the expense of the pacing (which was off) but I didn’t mind. The violence was okay. Some of the gore of the dead bodies they find was really well done. There could have been more but I’ll take it. And I really liked the music. The post-apocalyptic backdrop really was pointless. They could have easily been people in modern times stuck in the same situation. But it’s a Bruno Mattei movie and it has that undeniable sleaze that I can’t help but love. I could watch shit like this any day of the week.
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Ultimo Gallos
Grimlock
Dreams SUCK!Nightmares live FOREVER!
Posts: 14,363
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Post by Ultimo Gallos on Feb 13, 2021 0:02:24 GMT -5
Rats is a great great piece of 80s Italian rip off/sleaze.
If Bruno was still alive you know Brain Damage Films The ASylum would hire him to direct some stuff.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 13, 2021 2:32:48 GMT -5
36. Body Puzzle* *DVD* Talk about a puzzle; this had so many of the pieces (Lamberto Bava, so many actors I like) but it just never came together. Too much “mystery/thriller” not enough horror. And that’s a real shame because I really wanted to like this.
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Post by Jumpin' Jesse Walsh on Feb 13, 2021 14:28:01 GMT -5
Wrote this up later than anticipated but, hey, it's been a rough couple of weeks.
My review of Amityville 3D (1983)
Plot: A skeptical journalist purchases the Amityville house to reveal its hauntings as a hoax, only for its evil forces to wreak havoc once again.
Thanks its affront to good taste and refusal to literally go by the book, Amityville II: The Possession was successful enough to warrant the green lighting of a part 3, bound to be even more devoid of fresh ideas. The ace up the series’ sleeve this outing would be its use of 3D, a short-lived yet profitable fad in early ‘80s filmmaking. It also managed to get a young Meg Ryan and pre-Full House, pre-conviction Lori Loughlin. And the result? Totally bleh.
I wasn’t expecting anything great out of Amityville 3D, but I was hoping something more in the vein of part 2, even if just amounted a few neat special effects and throwing everything to the wall just to make a passable cinematic scare show. Alas, the content of part 2 was deemed too dark and disturbing for mainstream audiences, which means Amityville 3D is given an empty shell of a ghost story to work with. It’s the definition of safe. You can tell where this movie is going five minutes in and it doesn’t even have the decency to be stylish about it. The acting here is just awful. The worst performance is probably from Tess Harper who, despite her character’s juicy divorce drama and the threat of an ever-looming paranormal force, seems to wear one facial reaction for the whole movie. Can’t say that I blame her though. My face was stoic the entire way, too.
I can’t possibly imagine anyone watching this for the 3D and not being disappointed. It’s such a half-assed effort that you’d be forgiven if you forgot it was even meant to be in 3D to begin with. One would think the filmmakers would get a little creative and give us a ghost popping out through the screen, but they can’t even muster that. The most exciting 3D here is, um, a Frisbee?!? I seriously have a hard time remembering anything worthwhile. The strongest part of the movie is easily the finale, in which it finally goes full-on cheese. Demons popping out of wells! Exploding houses! Blasts of frost that look like lumpy Greek yogurt! Where was this movie for the previous 90 minutes? It’s not amazing, but at least it’s colorful and campy and something of substance.
Amityville 3D proved to be the death knell for the franchise’s mainstream viability. It was a huge flop at the box office and later installments were banished to direct-to-video until the 2005 remake briefly made it trendy to explore the original Amityville tale again. A deserved fate, I think. This movie is such a lazy and obvious cash grab. You don’t need 3D glasses to see that.
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adamclark52
El Dandy
I'm one with the Force; the Force is with me
Posts: 8,139
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Post by adamclark52 on Feb 14, 2021 4:28:43 GMT -5
Wolfen* *DVD* I bought this as part of my mission to own every movie that brutal death metal band Mortician sampled. This was sampled on a song called “Wolfen” on their 1999 Chainsaw Dismemberment album. Sadly the movie wasn’t really up to snuff. The parts with the Wolf were really well done. I liked the POV camera of the Wolf and the sound effects too. But there really wasn’t enough Wolf action. But they did a really good job of going the Jaws route and not showing the Wolf until late in the movie. That’s much more effective. Some of the locations were really cool and the overall vibe of the movie was really good. And the gore (what little there was) was good. But the lead (played by Albert Finney) really got on my nerves after a while with all his snarky one-liners and his motions. I liked Gregory Hines’ character much more but he was a supporting character. I did find it pretty funny how both of them nonchalantly ate while in the morgues or investigating murder scenes. I’m glad enough I saw it. I don’t feel ripped off for paying $15 (Canadian) for it.
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Post by Jumpin' Jesse Walsh on Feb 14, 2021 16:24:47 GMT -5
Kinda want to cozy up today and watch 2001's massive cult hit* Valentine.
*By massive cult hit, I mean a cult of one, who is me.
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