|
Post by rapidfire187 on Aug 27, 2014 16:55:29 GMT -5
My whole point is that it's easier to change your actions as an individual than it is to change everybody. If you keep getting stares, you're the only person that can fix that, even if it means compromising your style. I agree. It is easier to change your actions as an individual. Ok, so what is your point? Are you insinuating that I need to change as a person because I check out cute girls? When I said, "I'll look wherever I want", you just assume that means I want to stare at women and make them uncomfortable. I was just saying that I have every right in the world to look at what's in front of me and that nobody has any right to tell me to look away.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 16:59:10 GMT -5
I agree. It is easier to change your actions as an individual. Ok, so what is your point? Are you insinuating that I need to change as a person because I check out cute girls? When I said, "I'll look wherever I want", you just assume that means I want to stare at women and make them uncomfortable. I was just saying that I have every right in the world to look at what's in front of me and that nobody has any right to tell me to look away. Looking at people without being a letch is fine, but the idea that 'oh, I can't be held accountable if I WANT to look at someone repeatedly! Those people should not dress how they want without expecting attention' is the same line of dialogue which puts all blame onto an innocent individual. What if it's warm? What if they feel less restricted in stuff which may show skin? What if...they just want to wear whatever they feel best in? Why should anyone ever have to worry about being bothered or letched over or leered at, hell, I hate when people talk to me or tap my tattoos in public, my partner hardly feels great when they're bombarded by shit 5000 times more for daring to be born a different gender y'know? Looking is fine, but having no self control and getting shirty when someone calls you out on YOUR -and by extention people letching/looking even if they show awareness that it's probably not cool- lack of ability to change after you mention 'change, it's your fault!' is laughable.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 17:02:29 GMT -5
Sure there's a difference between looking and ogling but you know who determines that...?
The woman you're looking/ogling at.
And you can't say shit about it being wrong if her standards don't align with yours, considering she's the one you're eyeballing.
And too, a lot of us ain't nearly as slick as we think we are.
Women tend to notice that shit, mostly because it's shit they have to deal with on some level every day since they've hit puberty. Not to mention too, how a woman handles someone staring just a little too intently could have dire consequences so just because you been looking and she don't say anything doesn't mean she doesn't notice.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 17:07:09 GMT -5
I agree. It is easier to change your actions as an individual. Ok, so what is your point? Are you insinuating that I need to change as a person because I check out cute girls? When I said, "I'll look wherever I want", you just assume that means I want to stare at women and make them uncomfortable. I was just saying that I have every right in the world to look at what's in front of me and that nobody has any right to tell me to look away. I wasn't assuming anything about you personally. Just pointing out I think its funny that someone will rally about how people should be free to do what they want (look where ever they please) and also decry people wanting to dress how they please without being stared at in the same thread. Its like - yeah its easier to change your actions ....(caveat: excpet for people to stare at whoever they want, they don't have to change their actions). I dunno - I just don't think all women dress "provactively" (whatever that means) to get male attention. Women don't even need to dress a certain to get male attention (wanted or unwanted) so it doesn't even make sense to assume they would. I've taken classes and spoken at length with a lot of different women (both in academia and in day-to-day life) regarding this matter and it always comes back to the idea that "women dress that way because they want attention" or "if they dress that way, why do they get mad when people look at them?" which is such a bogus line of thinking. I'm not saying we shouldn't look - hell I look - a lot. A LOT. But also don't think any of these women are waking up in the morning and picking out their clothes to get men to look at them. I don't blame it on the clothes - I blame it on my own issues.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 17:15:22 GMT -5
And so continues my lifelong thankfulness that I was born a man. "I'm going to stare at your body if you want, and if you don't want me doing it, you should change how you dress!" is one of the lamest, most selfish things I can recall.
Completely skeeved out by this.
|
|
|
Post by "Gizzark" Mike Wronglevenay on Aug 27, 2014 17:15:54 GMT -5
Well this is a pretty horrible thread.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 17:20:38 GMT -5
Well this is a pretty horrible thread. It's a FAN thread about womenfolk, it's too be expected that it is creep central.
|
|
|
Post by rapidfire187 on Aug 27, 2014 17:21:29 GMT -5
Ok, I should clarify. "The right" to me, means legally. I have the right to stare at you but it's still creepy. You also have the right to curse me out for it. You don't have the right to hit me for it though, ya dig?
I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable so I would never stare at them. That's me. At the same time, if there are really that many creepy staring guys out there, and you know this, there's only one way to prevent it. Sure, you can talk about how annoying it is and curse out every guy that makes you feel uncomfortable, but that isn't a solution at all. Plenty of women dress modestly in all weather, it's not like you can't be comfortable and have your boobs covered at the same time. I do it all the time!
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 17:24:04 GMT -5
At the same time, if there are really that many creepy staring guys out there, and you know this, there's only one way to prevent it. Sure, you can talk about how annoying it is and curse out every guy that makes you feel uncomfortable, but that isn't a solution at all. Plenty of women dress modestly in all weather, it's not like you can't be comfortable and have your boobs covered at the same time. I do it all the time! First of all - there is more than one way to prevent it and it has nothing to do with women covering themselves up. Its about educating men to behave better - from the sounds of it - like you do. Women will be cat-called and leered at no matter what they wear, modestly or immodestly. Its got very very little to do with clothes.
|
|
|
Post by rapidfire187 on Aug 27, 2014 17:30:42 GMT -5
At the same time, if there are really that many creepy staring guys out there, and you know this, there's only one way to prevent it. Sure, you can talk about how annoying it is and curse out every guy that makes you feel uncomfortable, but that isn't a solution at all. Plenty of women dress modestly in all weather, it's not like you can't be comfortable and have your boobs covered at the same time. I do it all the time! First of all - there is more than one way to prevent it and it has nothing to do with women covering themselves up. Its about educating men to behave better - from the sounds of it - like you do. Women will be cat-called and leered at no matter what they wear, modestly or immodestly. Its got very very little to do with clothes. I guess I'm assuming that guys like that are beyond educating. Maybe I'm wrong. Anyway, my friend wanted me to mention that she dressed for attention yesterday, but purposely dressed down to avoid attention today. So I can at least say that one woman takes the attention factor into account every morning.
|
|
|
Post by King Boo on Aug 27, 2014 17:34:25 GMT -5
Holy crap.
Some girls dress for attention. Some have no taste. All should expect some kind of a reaction. None should be harassed. Looking isn't harassment. Catcalling isn't necessarily harassment, but it can be really rude and tasteless.
People talk in black and whites, like there's never any gray; like there aren't multiple factors for everything that happens. The inclination to paint everyone with a broad brush is understandable and sometimes easier in certain discussions. Dissecting human behavior is not one of them.
|
|
|
Post by MGH on Aug 27, 2014 17:35:18 GMT -5
Well this is a pretty horrible thread. It's a FAN thread about womenfolk, it's too be expected that it is creep central. I enjoy being a member of this place for the most part, but holy shit is this the truth.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 17:46:48 GMT -5
It's a FAN thread about womenfolk, it's too be expected that it is creep central. I enjoy being a member of this place for the most part, but holy shit is this the truth. You guys can't trust us enough to leave us home by ourselves, let alone trust us to talk about gender or race relations without someone setting the forum on fire.
|
|
|
Post by MGH on Aug 27, 2014 17:47:47 GMT -5
I enjoy being a member of this place for the most part, but holy shit is this the truth. You guys can't trust us enough to leave us home by ourselves, let alone trust us to talk about gender or race relations without someone setting the forum on fire. "I seriously don't get why you all don't think we can discuss politics like adults." lolrly?
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 27, 2014 17:53:07 GMT -5
You guys can't trust us enough to leave us home by ourselves, let alone trust us to talk about gender or race relations without someone setting the forum on fire. "I seriously don't get why you all don't think we can discuss politics like adults." lolrly? People want us to talk 6 o'clock news, but we're much better off in the Saturday morning cartoons area.
|
|
|
Post by Kevin Hamilton on Aug 27, 2014 18:04:43 GMT -5
Rasslin gets heated, there's no way weightier topics wouldn't/haven't.
|
|
agent817
Fry's dog Seymour
Doesn't Know Whose Ring It Is
Posts: 21,164
|
Post by agent817 on Aug 27, 2014 18:05:50 GMT -5
Well this is a pretty horrible thread. I regret starting it now.
|
|
|
Post by Piccolo on Aug 27, 2014 18:13:04 GMT -5
Ok, I should clarify. "The right" to me, means legally. I have the right to stare at you but it's still creepy. You also have the right to curse me out for it. You don't have the right to hit me for it though, ya dig? I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable so I would never stare at them. That's me. At the same time, if there are really that many creepy staring guys out there, and you know this, there's only one way to prevent it. Sure, you can talk about how annoying it is and curse out every guy that makes you feel uncomfortable, but that isn't a solution at all. Plenty of women dress modestly in all weather, it's not like you can't be comfortable and have your boobs covered at the same time. I do it all the time! When you have to start defending your legal right to be a creep, you've already lost the argument. And yeah, there's only one way to prevent creepy staring guys. Educate men about how shirking personal responsibility for their behavior is not masculine or natural, but pathetic and dangerous. Oh wait, that's not what you were talking about? Then how can you explain the stares people get when they're dressed modestly? How can you explain the man who stuck his hand up my knee-length skirt to grope my ass? Can you make that my fault? No? Then sit down and listen before you speak. Your argument would strip all personal responsibility from adults who know how not to be creeps, but choose to be creeps because they're bigger and stronger and know it won't get their nose broken. That's ugly. Don't be a creep. It's easy. It stops people from feeling threatened and scared when you're around. Unless you're a psycho, that should be reason enough to avoid doing it. ETA: I know you say you don't do this. But by excusing the people who do, justifying it as something they can't prevent, you're enabling them to continue doing it. That is JUST as messed up as doing it yourself, because by saying that you don't do it, you're undercutting the argument that they can't prevent themselves from doing it. You just think they shouldn't be criticized for it even IF they consciously choose to do it to be intimidating and threatening to others. Is letting go of even a small smidgen of male power so inconceivable that you'd insist that something that is manifestly and obviously not the woman's fault should be MADE her fault to excuse the men?
|
|
|
Post by "Gentleman" AJ Powell on Aug 27, 2014 18:13:15 GMT -5
Sometimes, when people make threads about being unable to get a girlfriend or generally not having success with the opposite sex, I feel kinda bad for them.
Then I see people create threads like this and feel it's probably for the best.
|
|
Nr1Humanoid
Hank Scorpio
Is the #3 humanoid at best.
Posts: 5,478
|
Post by Nr1Humanoid on Aug 27, 2014 18:15:46 GMT -5
The big ones does it to get people to pitch in for liposuction.
|
|