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Post by HMARK Center on Mar 1, 2011 10:16:08 GMT -5
We come back from commercial with the bell already ringing, Reptilian Ric Flair ready to challenge "Pistol" Pez Whatley for the vacated TNA World HardyWeight Title, with special guest string puller Bela Lugosi standing at the top of the entrance ramp, evilly smiling and toying with the strings that could well decide the entire destiny of these men (well, one reptile man) and of all TNA.
The two men circle, when a guitar riff fills the air. That music! It could only mean one thing! IT'S...
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bob
Salacious Crumb
The "other" Bob. FOC COURSE!
started the Madness Wars, Proudly the #1 Nana Hater on FAN
Posts: 78,464
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Post by bob on Mar 1, 2011 11:28:48 GMT -5
We come back from commercial with the bell already ringing, Reptilian Ric Flair ready to challenge "Pistol" Pez Whatley for the vacated TNA World HardyWeight Title, with special guest string puller Bela Lugosi standing at the top of the entrance ramp, evilly smiling and toying with the strings that could well decide the entire destiny of these men (well, one reptile man) and of all TNA. The two men circle, when a guitar riff fills the air. That music! It could only mean one thing! IT'S... Howdy Doody time! "Tazz" is ecstatic as is Bela.
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Ian Austin
Don Corleone
All will be well
Posts: 1,516
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Post by Ian Austin on Mar 1, 2011 12:25:23 GMT -5
We cut backstage where we see Vince Russo typing at a keyboard...
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bob
Salacious Crumb
The "other" Bob. FOC COURSE!
started the Madness Wars, Proudly the #1 Nana Hater on FAN
Posts: 78,464
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Post by bob on Mar 1, 2011 13:37:27 GMT -5
We cut backstage where we see Vince Russo typing at a keyboard... who, for some reason, is trying to type using his feet.
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Post by HMARK Center on Mar 1, 2011 14:56:30 GMT -5
The Pez Whatley/Rep Flair match continues, but we can only see it going on in the monitor in Russo's office. For some reason, the commentary is being done entirely in Swedish. Vince hears a noise on the monitor and looks over, seeing that Pez has Rep Flair up in...
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,508
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Mar 1, 2011 14:58:57 GMT -5
a giant net and has sent a Bellsprout to use Vine Whip. Unfortunately, it doesn't affect Flair and the vines bounce off the net and hit....
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edgedge
Team Rocket
asdf
Posts: 943
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Post by edgedge on Mar 1, 2011 15:03:43 GMT -5
...Mike Tenay right in the jaw. Tenay's jaw falls off, but he continues commentating (in Swedish) as if nothing happened. Rep Flair breaks loose from his net prison and spews acid over the first 5 rows. But this isn't just ANY acid, it's blue acid. Blue acid, unlike regular acid, is relatively useless and serves no purpose....UNLESS you want everyone to be turned into brooms.
Ric Flair carries the brooms to a ****1/2 match. Randy Orton comes out from the back with a video camera and a roll of toilet paper. Orton says...
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Post by HMARK Center on Mar 1, 2011 15:06:45 GMT -5
"Pez Whatley! I KNOW you're the sixth Ultimate Warrior! Help me clean up this mess and capture Rep Flair's soul on this camera!"
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Post by DSR on Mar 1, 2011 16:41:39 GMT -5
Pez Whatley responds by saying "iNo habla ingles!" and starts dancing around the ring. Bela Lugosi pulls a string, turning Pez Whatley into a Sharktopus!
Orton, undeterred, hits an RKO on Sharktopus Whatley, then picks up his microphone and says...
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edgedge
Team Rocket
asdf
Posts: 943
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Post by edgedge on Mar 1, 2011 16:57:34 GMT -5
"JOHN. CENA. GET. YOUR. ASS. OU-*Orton keels over. some backstage goons run out and wind Orton back up*-T. HERE. NOW." Cena flies out in a rocketship, crushing jawless Mike Tenay. Tazz comes out from the back to do commentary. No explanation on how he's not dead all of a sudden. Cena comes out of the rocketship with a missle launcher, and fires at Orton, who RKOs the missle out of mid-air!
Pez Whatley rips his torso skin off, revealing an nWo shirt! Orton RKOs him, and gets attacked by the 8,347,217th Ultimate Warrior. This Warrior was a lot fatter and had a third nipple on his left cheek. However, everybody's attention is drawn towards Hardcore Holly, who is...
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bob
Salacious Crumb
The "other" Bob. FOC COURSE!
started the Madness Wars, Proudly the #1 Nana Hater on FAN
Posts: 78,464
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Post by bob on Mar 1, 2011 17:03:14 GMT -5
urinating into Matt Hardy's mouth.
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Post by Black Swagger on Mar 1, 2011 17:24:45 GMT -5
Matt Hardy seems to be cool with it until Jeff Hardy comes from the back driving a purple moped 90 miles an hour crashing into his brother. Hardcore Holly then picks up the Mic after seeing their lifeless bodies, and says.....
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Post by DSR on Mar 1, 2011 17:28:49 GMT -5
Matt Hardy seems to be cool with it until Jeff Hardy comes from the back driving a purple moped 90 miles an hour crashing into his brother. Hardcore Holly then picks up the Mic after seeing their lifeless bodies, and says..... "Me love you long time!" Then, for no reason, Hardcore Holly pulls out a hammer and starts hitting everybody he runs into: Cena, Orton, Sharktopus Whatley, Tor Johnson, Turd Bully Ray, each and every Rockette. Holly then walks into a room, where the Hammer Bros. (from Super Mario Bros.) are standing there, with hammers in their hands. Hardcore Holly takes a deep breath, and says...
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Post by rogers67 on Mar 1, 2011 17:31:31 GMT -5
Thanks for making a part 2 to this! i never thought this would have gotten to 30 pages!
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Post by Black Swagger on Mar 1, 2011 17:32:29 GMT -5
You guys may have hammers, but I have a tag team partner who has been dealing with you losers since 1985! All of the sudden the Super Mario theme begins to play and out comes Mario who screams "It's Me Mario!" The bell rings starting the match.........
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bob
Salacious Crumb
The "other" Bob. FOC COURSE!
started the Madness Wars, Proudly the #1 Nana Hater on FAN
Posts: 78,464
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Post by bob on Mar 1, 2011 17:33:07 GMT -5
Mario, turns heel on Holly by shooting fireballs at him.
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Post by HMARK Center on Mar 1, 2011 19:59:15 GMT -5
Hardcore Holly, seered and screaming in agony, bellows you "MARIO! YOU WERE 'SPOSED TO BE MAH FRIIIIIEEEEEND!!!"
Mario, of course, is actually Ron Jeremy in his old Super Mario porno costume, and he's now scheduled in a three-way dance with Orgazmo and Jizz Master Zero. But when his two opponents appear, it's actually two familiar TNA faces in their costumes! It's actually-
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Raging_Demons
Don Corleone
I Can Ride My Bike With No Handlebars, No Handlebars, No Handlebars!
Posts: 1,620
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Post by Raging_Demons on Mar 1, 2011 20:04:50 GMT -5
Gunner & Murphy.
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El Hijo De Slapnuts
Samurai Cop
Really waiting for Minoru Suzuki to face off with a live gator.....
Posts: 2,256
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Post by El Hijo De Slapnuts on Mar 1, 2011 20:06:37 GMT -5
Cheekz and Maffew of Botchamania
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bob
Salacious Crumb
The "other" Bob. FOC COURSE!
started the Madness Wars, Proudly the #1 Nana Hater on FAN
Posts: 78,464
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Post by bob on Mar 1, 2011 20:15:22 GMT -5
Gunner&Murphy who have somehow had their bodies merge together as one, start to fight Cheekz and Maffew of Botchamania who have also somehow had their bodies merge together as one.
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