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Post by stevieboy on Jan 21, 2013 0:45:06 GMT -5
I don't know if anyone remembers the skit from the old Conan show where stars from 80's shows like Mr. T and Tom Selleck would reveal "secrets" but I was thinking a WWE version would be funny.
Brodus Clay: I hate the funk. I hate it! You want to know how I got these manboobs? From eating too much damn funk on a roll!
Triple H: I literally buried a guy once. I accidently ran down a homeless guy during a wild night of partying with the boys from Evolution so me, Dave, Ric and Randy had to bury the poor guy in desert at 4 in the morning. We made a pact to never tell anyone what happened that night... Oh crap.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jan 21, 2013 0:48:36 GMT -5
Shawn Michaels - I... I'm not The Heartbreak Kid anymore.  I begged them to change up my gimmick since I was older but they said if we do, you're going to be The Boogeyman or some crap, I mean who the hell is The Boogeyman? |
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chazraps
Wade Wilson
Better have my money when I come-a collect!
Posts: 27,970 
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Post by chazraps on Jan 21, 2013 0:51:31 GMT -5
JR: Steve Williams wasn't a real doctor. I wish I would have known that before I let him remove my gall bladder.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jan 21, 2013 1:18:43 GMT -5
Bret Hart: I really did have Sunny days.
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Post by Nathan Bridger on Jan 21, 2013 1:25:48 GMT -5
Vince McMahon: Originally Monday Night Raw was just going to be a cooking show showing you how to barbecue raw meat. Why do you think I hired Jim Ross? But, he wouldn't shut up about sauces and two-dollar steaks and that's when I realized how stupid the show would be, so, I slapped together another wrestling show at the last minute... I didn't even have time to change the name.
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Post by Citizen Grimm on Jan 21, 2013 1:25:57 GMT -5
Sin Cara: *Points*
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Post by BoilerRoomBrawler on Jan 21, 2013 1:29:42 GMT -5
Trish Stratus: When I go to the bathroom, I beef...
*forms a circle with her hands*
Trish Stratus: One, two feet; size of John Cena's forearms. To save time, I do it in the shower and heel it down the drain.
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Post by Aaron E. Dangerously on Jan 21, 2013 1:34:15 GMT -5
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Post by Cry Me a Wiggle on Jan 21, 2013 1:38:02 GMT -5
*Randy Orton takes a long, deliberate drag on a cigarette. *
Orton: "I've been accused of pooping in a diva's bag. That's just not true. I pooped in Chris Benoit's urn."
SECREEEETS
Orton: "Some people ask why I keep marrying new wives. It's because I'm an avid gardener, and mulch isn't cheap."
SECREEEETS
Orton: "Want to know the real reason I was in military prison? Let's just say... 9/11 really was an inside job." *Smirks at camera.*
SECREEEETS
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Post by BoilerRoomBrawler on Jan 21, 2013 2:09:18 GMT -5
JOHN CENA: I have watched Flash Gordon every day of my life since I first started at OVW. I can quote like 75% of that movie now.
SEEECRETS...
JOHN CENA: One time Carlito and Eddie Fatu bet me $5 each i couldn't drink a gallon of diner half-n-half in one sitting without throwing it up. I not only did it, but I went up to Undertaker in the same diner and punched my cheeks , sending the last of it all over him and the waitress. I made $80 bucks that night. I was on top of the world.
SEECRETS...
JOHN CENA: Every time I'm the WWE Champion, I lose all of my sex drive. The night I was supposed to lose the title to Randy Orton at Unforgiven 2007, it came back suddenly. I hid away in a bathroom stall and jerked it to a WWE program flyer so hard and so much that I tore my pectoral muscle and then they changed it to a DQ loss later that night.
SEEECRETS...
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Post by slappy on Jan 21, 2013 2:14:21 GMT -5
Steve Austin: I prefer wine.
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,079
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Post by Mozenrath on Jan 21, 2013 2:18:39 GMT -5
Dolph: I don't think Dolph Ziggler is a very good name. I tried to suggest Petri Waximoff, but they wouldn't have it.
SECRETS
Dolph: Before I shook everyone's hand, I'd crush a handful of cheetos in my palm. It took Howard Finkel six months to wash it all off.
SECRETS
Dolph: I had a gimmick where I was a male cheerleader. The reassignment surgery was totally worth it.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jan 21, 2013 2:27:53 GMT -5
Shawn Michaels: I never lost my smile.
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Post by stevieboy on Jan 21, 2013 2:59:06 GMT -5
*Randy Orton takes a long, deliberate drag on a cigarette. * Orton: "I've been accused of pooping in a diva's bag. That's just not true. I pooped in Chris Benoit's urn." SECREEEETS Orton: "Some people ask why I keep marrying new wives. It's because I'm an avid gardener, and mulch isn't cheap." SECREEEETS Orton: "Want to know the real reason I was in military prison? Let's just say... 9/11 really was an inside job." *Smirks at camera.* SECREEEETS Too soon to request a photoshop of Orton RKOing the Twin Towers? ;D |
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Post by EoE: Well There's Your Problem on Jan 21, 2013 3:10:52 GMT -5
 "Constable Bossman might like to act tough, but he also walks the beat of Cobb County in control-top pantyhose." |
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Post by Magic knows Black Lives Matter on Jan 21, 2013 3:24:27 GMT -5
CM Punk: I never wanted to cut the pipebomb promo. In fact, the whole thing was written by Vince. When he told me about it, I said, "No Vince! I love everything about WWE right now! I'm glad I'm not being pushed as a top guy, that would just mean more work for me!" But Vince demanded it and hey, I gotta do what the boss says.
Stone Cold: Honestly, I hate beer. I much prefer a nice red wine spritzer.
Daniel Bryan: I'm completly indifferent to life. I don't say yes. I don't say no. I'm not happy or sad. I just am.
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Post by BoilerRoomBrawler on Jan 21, 2013 4:14:28 GMT -5
SHEAMUS: The Irish Curse ain'ta work, fella!
SEECRETS...
SHEAMUS: In my early days in WWE, this one fella you might have heard of - Bill Cosby. Turns out he's a fan and he met me backstage after an ECW taping. I've never told anyone this before, but he paid me to let him place his head between my thighs and make weird noises as he wiggled his face between them. No blowjobs or nothin' fella, but I made $80 that night.
SEECRETS...
SHEAMUS: I'm not actually from Ireland. I just watched Boondock Saints a lot and practice in the mirror at night.
SEECRETS...
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chazraps
Wade Wilson
Better have my money when I come-a collect!
Posts: 27,970
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Post by chazraps on Jan 21, 2013 5:51:46 GMT -5
Steve Austin: I prefer wine. Ha! We have a winner! |
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Heartbreaker
King Koopa
Is actually Bindi Irwin
RIP Punk's media scrum, Page 54, Muffins, Biting People Bad™ (2022 - 2022)
Posts: 11,846 
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Post by Heartbreaker on Jan 21, 2013 6:29:12 GMT -5
CM Punk: "I have a crack addiction."
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Post by Ricky Nightshade on Jan 21, 2013 6:56:32 GMT -5
Damian Sandow: Y'all n-words be trippin'. YOLO bitch 420 fgt blaze it up! Do you even lift?
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