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Post by SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman on Sept 9, 2014 6:03:18 GMT -5
Casino Royale (the new one). Yaaaaaay, poker games, villain whose gimmick sounds cool but is actually pretty bland, Bond without a personality, witty one-liners replaced with generic stupid insults ("Now the whole world's gonna know that you died scratching my balls! Yuck yuck I said 'balls' I'm so clever and gritty and edgy and realistic because that's a realistic reaction to have!), Bond being saved by the cavalry rather than his own skills. How... fasci... na... *yawn*... zzzzz...
F*** I'll take Die Another Day over that any time. It may have been dumb as f*** but at least it was entertaining. Not in the ways it intended, but still, at least it made me feel like they tried.
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,204
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Post by Mozenrath on Sept 9, 2014 6:11:40 GMT -5
Funny Games is pure, unadulterated garbage with no redeeming value unless you've just got to see Naomi Watts in her undies in a creepy scene or if you have a fetish for downer endings with no emotional payoff. I can't rightly call it boring, as it actively disgusted and infuriated me, but still, just save yourself the time and watch the first part of Death Wish and turn it off before Charles Bronson retaliates. There, you saw Funny Games and saved yourself a lot of time.
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Post by Freddy BooJangles on Sept 9, 2014 8:04:02 GMT -5
The Lord of The Ring movies Peter Jackson's King Kong The Dark Knight Rises The Dark Knight Man of Steel
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Ben Wyatt
Crow T. Robot
Are You Gonna Go My Way?
I don't get it. At all. It's kind of a small horse, I mean what am I missing? Am I crazy?
Posts: 41,529
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Post by Ben Wyatt on Sept 9, 2014 8:43:48 GMT -5
Borat.
I just didn't find it funny or entertaining.
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Post by No Name is needed Bro Beans on Sept 9, 2014 9:13:44 GMT -5
Outside Providence it looked kinda funny in commercials but I found it boring as hell
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Post by salsashark on Sept 9, 2014 12:45:54 GMT -5
Lord of the Rings is easily the most boring movie I have ever seen. I will probably never try LOTR again because I hated the experience so much. I imagine I would have been a lot more accepting of a TV miniseries.
Alien is a great movie, but those first 20 to 30 minutes are just too long for its own good. Slicing that time in half would have made it so much better. "In media res" would have been a good idea for this.
The recent Godzilla was also incredibly boring after about a half-hour/maybe 45 minutes. Excess murkiness, stale characters, just nothing to redeem it. Massively lame and a total letdown.
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Post by salsashark on Sept 9, 2014 12:50:35 GMT -5
Funny Games is pure, unadulterated garbage with no redeeming value unless you've just got to see Naomi Watts in her undies in a creepy scene or if you have a fetish for downer endings with no emotional payoff. I can't rightly call it boring, as it actively disgusted and infuriated me, but still, just save yourself the time and watch the first part of Death Wish and turn it off before Charles Bronson retaliates. There, you saw Funny Games and saved yourself a lot of time. Isn't this the fundamental point of the movie? It's supposed to be an antidote to the way the vast majority of movies unfold.
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,204
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Post by Mozenrath on Sept 9, 2014 12:53:51 GMT -5
Funny Games is pure, unadulterated garbage with no redeeming value unless you've just got to see Naomi Watts in her undies in a creepy scene or if you have a fetish for downer endings with no emotional payoff. I can't rightly call it boring, as it actively disgusted and infuriated me, but still, just save yourself the time and watch the first part of Death Wish and turn it off before Charles Bronson retaliates. There, you saw Funny Games and saved yourself a lot of time. Isn't this the fundamental point of the movie? It's supposed to be an antidote to the way the vast majority of movies unfold. Intentionally making me hate a movie still makes me hate the movie, so it's kind of a hollow victory.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Sept 9, 2014 16:36:41 GMT -5
Kudos to anyone that has said Lord of the Rings. I got the trilogy for Christmas one year and tapped out hard while watching the first one and never bothered to even check out the others. Holy shit was that movie boring.
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J is Justice
Wade Wilson
Will now be grateful.
Hi.
Posts: 28,940
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Post by J is Justice on Sept 9, 2014 16:48:03 GMT -5
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen.
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Post by Some Guy on Sept 9, 2014 17:34:20 GMT -5
Transformers 2 was so dull that I kept checking my watch, something I refuse to do during movies normally.
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PKO
King Koopa
Posts: 12,617
Member is Online
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Post by PKO on Sept 9, 2014 19:48:48 GMT -5
Some great films getting mentioned. It's funny how different peoples tastes can be.
I've seen plenty of bad films but I've rarely watched a film and been outright bored. Last Days is my pick. A film that I really wanted to like, I actively searched it out to watch and eventually spent way too much money on it, but good god is it a chore. I tried so hard to enjoy it, but it got to the point where for five minutes the main character (totally not Kurt Cobain) walks in a forest with nothing happening and I gave up. I've watched it several times since the first attempt, the whole way through, and it's still just terribly boring. There's a good song near the end which is about it's only saving grace.
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Welfare Willis
Crow T. Robot
Pornomancer 555-BONE FDIC Bonsured
Game Center CX Kacho on!
Posts: 44,259
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Post by Welfare Willis on Sept 9, 2014 20:27:54 GMT -5
Kudos to anyone that has said Lord of the Rings. I got the trilogy for Christmas one year and tapped out hard while watching the first one and never bothered to even check out the others. Holy shit was that movie boring. I found them boring as well, but I think it helps if you've read the books first.
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mizerable
Fry's dog Seymour
You're the lowest on the totem pole here, Alva. The lowest.
Posts: 23,475
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Post by mizerable on Sept 9, 2014 22:05:41 GMT -5
I read Fellowship and...yeah.
I really liked the Hobbit book, but the follow up books just weren't special.
I personally think Peter Jackson is a hack, I mean to me, any film maker would need to put some trademark on their work if they adapted a book. To me, LOTR is pretty much exactly the book. I know a lot of people like that, but to me...*why* even adapt it then? Because it's simply another medium to enjoy the work? Come on.
If they found a way to inject LOTR into your bloodstream as another way to "enjoy" it, would people just accept it? I figure the basic argument is that it reaches new audiences. Yawn. Usually if I discover a book through a movie, I'll read the book and usually enjoy it more for different reasons than the movie. So telling me the books are the same is actually encouraging me to not read the books because the movies were so f***ing boring.
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Bub (BLM)
Patti Mayonnaise
advocates duck on rodent violence
Fed. Up.
Posts: 37,742
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Post by Bub (BLM) on Sept 9, 2014 22:09:14 GMT -5
Kudos to anyone that has said Lord of the Rings. I got the trilogy for Christmas one year and tapped out hard while watching the first one and never bothered to even check out the others. Holy shit was that movie boring. I found them boring as well, but I think it helps if you've read the books first. I've never read the books and I love the films. I just enjoy the tone of the world.
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Post by MGH on Sept 9, 2014 22:12:21 GMT -5
It was mentioned here twice, but 2001.
It feels like 2001 minutes of Stanley Kubrick inhaling his own farts.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Sept 9, 2014 22:14:37 GMT -5
Angel Heart, Inglourious Basterds and A History of Violence
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Post by SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman on Sept 10, 2014 2:35:46 GMT -5
Funny Games is pure, unadulterated garbage with no redeeming value unless you've just got to see Naomi Watts in her undies in a creepy scene or if you have a fetish for downer endings with no emotional payoff. I can't rightly call it boring, as it actively disgusted and infuriated me, but still, just save yourself the time and watch the first part of Death Wish and turn it off before Charles Bronson retaliates. There, you saw Funny Games and saved yourself a lot of time. I was going to nominate that but I didn't find it boring as much as downright infuriating. What kind of sad pathetic f*** do you have to be to spend months and hundreds of thousands of dollars to make a film whose only goal is to insult the audience? And for what? Because they have the audacity to enjoy movies that include violence, which Michael Haneke seriously believes is just as bad as committing the violence yourself. Funny Games isn't a movie, it's a one hour and a half long YouTube comment "if u liek horor film ur just as bad as bb kilrz! thumbs up if u agre!". Haneke somehow managed to bully people through film, it's really the equivalent of a kid grabbing another kid's fist and going "why do you keep hitting yourself?" when he has his killers go on their "you're just as bad as us" rants without at any point considering the audience's point of view. And of course, in his incoherent rambling of a film he never considers the role of the director. Seriously, if the audience is just as bad as the villains for watching the movie, what does it say about the director, the guy who actually made it happen? This whole thing just reeks of a guy who is bitter that horror movies get more accolades than his pretentious yet empty flicks. And what does it say about the director when he does it TWICE as the one with Naomi Watts is a shot-for-shot remake of a film of the same name he made 10 years earlier, although apparently Haneke did add in an extra f***-up during the already stupid scene where a character rewinds the movie using a remote, except in the remake they do it by pressing the "play" button, which shows exactly how much care went into the making of it considering the shot is a close-up on the remote so a cursory look at it would have made him notice it. F*** this oscar-baiting piece of shit director and f*** his oscar-baiting piece of shit movies. One of the few things worse than the movie itself is the number of people jerking off their ego-cock who call it a clever analysis of the horror fandom, I can only presume they're the same kind of people who refer to any horror movie that dares have horrifying content as "torture porn" like it actually means something. Films - and art in general - are made for an audience. If your goal when making a film is to INSULT your audience and you just make it for your own revenge fantasy, then your film sucks and you suck at your job. And that's why horror movies get more accolades than your crap. I've seen all three August Underground films, which may be as close to genuine "torture porn" as you might get and believe me when I say those films are still less offensive than Funny Games, because at least these films are still made FOR an audience, they're still meant to please someone, to give them something. Haneke just takes your money then spits in your face. Again, f*** this guy.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Sept 10, 2014 3:58:27 GMT -5
The Lake House
Back to the Future it ain't.
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Post by Raskovnik on Sept 10, 2014 4:41:50 GMT -5
Funny Games is pure, unadulterated garbage with no redeeming value unless you've just got to see Naomi Watts in her undies in a creepy scene or if you have a fetish for downer endings with no emotional payoff. I can't rightly call it boring, as it actively disgusted and infuriated me, but still, just save yourself the time and watch the first part of Death Wish and turn it off before Charles Bronson retaliates. There, you saw Funny Games and saved yourself a lot of time. I was going to nominate that but I didn't find it boring as much as downright infuriating. What kind of sad pathetic f*** do you have to be to spend months and hundreds of thousands of dollars to make a film whose only goal is to insult the audience? And for what? Because they have the audacity to enjoy movies that include violence, which Michael Haneke seriously believes is just as bad as committing the violence yourself. Funny Games isn't a movie, it's a one hour and a half long YouTube comment "if u liek horor film ur just as bad as bb kilrz! thumbs up if u agre!". Haneke somehow managed to bully people through film, it's really the equivalent of a kid grabbing another kid's fist and going "why do you keep hitting yourself?" when he has his killers go on their "you're just as bas us" rants without at any point considering the audience's point of view. And of course, in his incoherent rambling of a film he never considers the role of the director. Seriously, if the audience is just as bad as the villains for watching the movie, what does it say about the director, the guy who actually made it happen? This whole thing just reeks of a guy who is bitter that horror movies get more accolades than his pretentious yet empty flicks. And what does it say about the director when he does it TWICE as the one with Naomi Watts is a shot-for-shot remake of a film of the same name he made 10 years earlier, although apparently Haneke did add in an extra f***-up during the already stupid scene where a character rewinds the movie using a remote, except in the remake they do it by pressing the "play" button, which shows exactly how much care went into the making of it considering the shot is a close-up on the remote so a cursory look at it would have made him notice it. F*** this oscar-baiting piece of shit director and f*** his oscar-baiting piece of shit movies. One of the few things worse than the movie itself is the number of people jerking off their ego-cock who call it a clever analysis of the horror fandom, I can only presume they're the same kind of people who refer to any horror movie that dares have horrifying content as "torture porn" like it actually means something. Films - and art in general - are made for an audience. If your goal when making a film is to INSULT your audience and you just make it for your own revenge fantasy, then your film sucks and you suck at your job. And that's why horror movies get more accoladzs than your crap. I've seen all three August Underground films, which may be as close to genuine "torture porn" as you might get and believe me when I say those films are still less offensive than Funny Games, because at least these films are still made FOR an audience, they're still meant to please someone, to give them something. Haneke just takes your money then spits in your face. Again, f*** this guy. I agree with everything you said. It is the Spec Ops: The Line of movies.
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