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Post by Joe Neglia on Jun 19, 2020 21:14:52 GMT -5
PLEASE NOTE: This thread was begun by this administrator account, but under the name Madison Carter. I'm Joe Neglia, the new admin, but the text below and throughout this thread that appears with my name next to it is not actually mine.
With everything going on, I feel it necessary to step forward and talk about something. You may find it damning, you may find it a cautionary tale; whatever you take away from this, it needs to be told. I have taken great pride in this message board and our stance on trolls, creeps and the like. We have tried our best to make this place a "safe" place for everyone, without fear of being accosted or harassed. While we do better than others, we're still not there yet, but I also realize that I have to be honest if I am to be trusted in this sort of thing.
Twelve years ago, when this incarnation of the board first started, we had a "hidden" forum for the mods and a few posters we were close with (a dozen or so, maybe 20), where we could hang out and shoot the breeze "away" from things. We could swear (this was when virtually everything was still censored), talk politics, whatever. During that time, I offered to give anyone in the group (all adults) a personalized name color if they sent me nudes. I received a couple and fulfilled the promise of the name color change (those involved are not any of the current posters with unique name colors). The hidden forum did not last very long and we axed it not terribly long after. Nothing of that nature has transpired since.
At the time, it was "just friends having fun"...but in the end, I used my position here to offer rewards for favors. It was wrong and I can not apologize enough for doing so.
I bring this forward because no matter how minor this may sound in relation to everything else that's coming out about the wrestling business right now, it was and is wrong. I understand whatever you may feel reading this, and I can only hope that my actions in the decade-plus since show I am sincere in my stance on the issues at hand.
Thank you for listening.
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Spider2024
Patti Mayonnaise
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Posts: 39,209
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Post by Spider2024 on Jun 19, 2020 21:25:56 GMT -5
For your honesty, I actually will applaud you.
I will admit, on the early days of the internet and AOL chat rooms, I would say harmless/"friends having fun" stuff in the chat rooms with friends. Who cares, right? No one 'meant' anything by it, we were all buddies in our own private chat room. Still, I'm sure any of that past stuff would look very bad today, because we're all more mature than we used to be 15 years ago (or at least most of us are.)
I do wonder though. I don't think anything I've said on a message board will look especially bad today, but I can't remember everything I've ever said about everyone. I wonder whether anything I've said will look as horrid as the stuff that used to be common in the photo threads here.
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Post by Koda, Master Crunchyroller on Jun 19, 2020 21:54:01 GMT -5
Obviously this isn’t like a fantastic look for you, but unlike most sex pests coming to light this week, I’m not going to go scorched earth on you, because you actually had the balls to come forth and tell on yourself, which is something none of these asshats have had the capability of doing.
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Post by EvenBaldobombHasAJob on Jun 19, 2020 22:00:36 GMT -5
It's pretty honorable for you to come forward about this. It shows how much we've all grown as people. At the time you're saying this happened I probably wouldn't have thought "Well that's terrible" but if it happened now I'd probably think differently. Kudos to you for coming forward and also for changing. FAN is a place I can come to and not expect to have any of that sort of thing happen.
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Xxcjb01xX [PIECE OF: SH-]
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Post by Xxcjb01xX [PIECE OF: SH-] on Jun 19, 2020 22:25:46 GMT -5
Good on you for coming forward about this. It shows that people can grow and change from doing stupid shit when they were younger. I hope this helped you get a weight off your chest man, you are appreciated for trying to make FAN the best experience it can be
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Post by Some Baritone guy IS REDEEMED! on Jun 19, 2020 22:29:07 GMT -5
Honestly, you've got to look at the time at which it happened. Values change as time goes on, back at the time you did it, that sort of thing was something that wasn't seen as that big a deal. The dialogue that exists now about these types of activities didn't exist back then.
That doesn't mean it wasn't wrong, but I don't think it's entirely necessary to beat someone over the head with it when they already understand the fact that what they did is wrong.
It takes a lot of courage to do what you did just now. No one was asking you to do this. No one was gunning for you over this, and if you hadn't done this there was a good chance no one ever would have found out.
You came clean, not because someone outed you, not because you were at risk of being outed, but because you knew it was the right thing to do.
I don't speak for anybody else here, but I absolutely respect that. And I forgive it, fully and without any hesitation.
You're a good person, I truly believe you've proven that here. Now forgive yourself Madison.
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hargh
Dennis Stamp
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Post by hargh on Jun 19, 2020 22:48:36 GMT -5
It must be a relief on a personal level to get that off your shoulders. I respect you for facing that and coming clean for everyone to see. I doubt anyone is going to be judgemental. You're truly a good man.
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Post by Andee9001 on Jun 19, 2020 23:37:32 GMT -5
We all make mistakes. At the end of the day it's up to all of us to take responsibilty for that and try to become better people from it. I can appreciate your honesty in coming forward.
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ASYLUMHAUSEN
Fry's dog Seymour
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Post by ASYLUMHAUSEN on Jun 20, 2020 0:27:54 GMT -5
I applaud your candor & honesty, Madison.
It doesn’t excuse the actions but, bottom line is a LOT OF PEOPLE - myself included - probably have a lot of Internet Skeletons in their closet. Especially anyone old enough to have been on the early internet 20/25 years ago. Shit like this was, sadly, part of the culture. Doesn’t make it right, but to deny that there was just a totally different mindset about this kind of shit is folly.
So, again, I applaud your candor and honesty, sir.
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lucas_lee
Hank Scorpio
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Post by lucas_lee on Jun 20, 2020 4:48:23 GMT -5
You came clean, now what will you do with it? Are going to apologize to your victims and try to make amends? Because this statement to me is a good mea culpa, but I'm more concerned with the victims and how what you did affected them
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Post by The Legendary Ring Troll {BLM} on Jun 20, 2020 9:39:49 GMT -5
Me too, buddy.
I ran the HiWF back in the early 2000s, around 17-18 years old. Back then, only people who role played in eFeds were guys. Young girl brings her character into the fed, 15 years old and the girlfriend of another member. I definitely pestered her for photos a couple times, but she never sent any and I never held it against her. Still a really sleazy thing to do. Worst part is, there were mid 20 year olds, maybe one late 20 year old, who she told me would always try to get nudes off her too. Haven’t heard from her in years, pretty sure she never sent anyone anything, but to be 15 years old and have all these creepy old dudes wanting to see you naked...f*** I feel bad for her. Surprised she stuck around as long as she did, very strong girl.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2020 9:42:21 GMT -5
Appreciate this Madison.
I was one of the few invited to this. At one point, I did save a nude to my then desktop but it didn't last long before I deleted it because I felt weird (even though I was far from being the more responsible person I am today.)
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Post by cuppacoffee - slight return on Jun 20, 2020 11:19:48 GMT -5
My view is if someone’s a man right now and they’re *not* going back over their past life, reevaluating interactions, thinking, “Was that ok? Was that presuming too much? Was I a bit iffy there?” then they’re either a saint or completely deluded.
We’ve all got to up our game. I think your candour about the past is a good step in the right direction.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2020 11:31:09 GMT -5
If there was anyone who couldn't sincerely look at things they did in their past and think "wow, that was f'd up" then I would think that they just haven't grown as a human being.
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Zone Was Wrong
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Post by Zone Was Wrong on Jun 20, 2020 12:35:40 GMT -5
Yeah, I'm 33, going on 34 now, and I remember all sorts of f'd up things I used to do in chat rooms back when I was in high school and such that I look back on and get sick to my stomach. If there was a way I could tell all those women now how sorry I am today for making them feel uncomfortable, I'd be contacting each one privately. It haunts me what my advances might have done to their psyche. I can't judge you any harder than I judge myself. Since then I've grown as a person over the last 15 years, and I make it a point now to battle against these kinds of mindsets and actions. I've thrown myself into social justice, possibly subconsciously as some sort of penance for my shameful actions when I was younger and stupider. Thanks for coming forward yourself.
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Wardlow on Wardlow 54
Wade Wilson
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Post by Wardlow on Wardlow 54 on Jun 20, 2020 12:44:59 GMT -5
Props for owning your mistake. I honestly don't see it as that big a deal, just friends messing around. But it clearly bothered you enough to confess. So hopefully getting out in the open brings you peace.
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Post by autisticgeordie on Jun 20, 2020 13:23:37 GMT -5
I have to give you credit for coming forward and actually owning up to it unlike a lot of wrestlers who have been shown to be sex-pests, not that I'm saying that's what you or, or anything; but even back then what you did wasn't on the same level as a lot of the shit that's coming out. I just hope that you getting this off your chest has helped you.
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Post by Hit Girl on Jun 20, 2020 13:59:21 GMT -5
You shouldn't have made such an offer of course, even in jest, but I also question the mindset of anyone who would send nude pictures of themselves online for the sole purpose of changing the colour of their name on a forum.
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Post by dirtyoldman on Jun 20, 2020 14:12:57 GMT -5
You shouldn't have made such an offer of course, even in jest, but I also question the mindset of anyone who would send nude pictures of themselves online for the sole purpose of changing the colour of their name on a forum. I actually thought the same thing myself. Is having a different colour font worth sharing a pic of your bits? Who knows. Still, like you said, all adults and you put the offer out there and they sent them on their own free will. As long as you weren't badgering them to do it, then fair enough. Maybe a little sleazy but hey, who hasn't done dodgy shameful stuff?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 20, 2020 14:25:15 GMT -5
Nobody's without sin, and nobody's leaving this mortal coil with 100% clean hands.
The past few days has made me rethink and feel ashamed for how I've carried myself in a lot of instances in the past. It's painful, but it's healthy. Sometimes all we can do is just look at the person in the mirror and be better than who we used to be.
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