tirtefaa
Unicron
If you wanna know the truth, you gotta dig up Johnny Booth.
Posts: 2,918
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Post by tirtefaa on Apr 20, 2023 12:19:27 GMT -5
Cage match #1 - winner must escape cage
Roman is dead to rights as his opponent starts climbing the cage.
Heyman, Jey, Jimmy and Solo all spring from underneath the ring, each of which is holding a piece of garden fencing you could buy at Lowe's.
The four men surround Roman and place their fencing together to create a "cage" around Roman.
Roman then rolls over the top of this new "cage" with ease, thus escaping from it.
Cage match #2 Rematch - winner must escape actual cage
The match begins. Roman immediately immediately leaves the ring and reaches under apron. He pulls out a ACME style rocket, lights it and immediately shoots over the top of the cage.
Cage match #3 Rerematch - winner must escape actual cage and not use projectiles to do so
Match happens normally. All the sudden after Roman gets a short upper hand, a hole appears in the ring. Paul Heyman (wearing a miner's helmet) pokes his head out and motions to Roman. Roman climbs down the hole and reappears outside of the cage in another hole.
Cage match #4 Rererematch - winner must escape actual cage and not use projectiles to do so, nor burrow under the ring to escape
Roman is seen backstage chugging a strange bottle of liquid.
Once the match takes place, it is revealed that the stuff Roman drank allows him to transcend solid material.
He casually walks through the mesh cage and is declared the winner.
Cage match #5 Rerererematch - winner must escape actual cage and not use projectiles to do so, nor burrow under the ring, nor use any performance substance that would transcend physical space
Match begins, Heyman, Solo, Jey and Jimmy immediately storm the ring, holding Roman's opponent down as Roman carefully scales the cage.
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Venti
Unicron
Posts: 3,002
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Post by Venti on Apr 20, 2023 12:23:16 GMT -5
Roman's opponent is kicking Reigns' ass.
However, Solo Sikoa distracts Roman's opponent.
Meanwhile, Roman absorbs Jimmy and Jey to transform into Perfect Roman. Roman's opponent can barely even land a single punch on Roman.
Roman hits the spear and wins.
However, Adam Pearce comes out and declares that DBZ-style transformations are against WWE rules, so Roman has to spit Jimmy and Jey back out to become Imperfect Roman, and the match is restarted.
After the bell rings again, Solo Sikoa once again distracts the babyface opponent.
Roman hits the spear and wins.
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tirtefaa
Unicron
If you wanna know the truth, you gotta dig up Johnny Booth.
Posts: 2,918
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Post by tirtefaa on Apr 20, 2023 12:34:46 GMT -5
Tuxedo match
Roman is wearing three tuxedos.
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Post by Jaws the Shark on Apr 20, 2023 12:43:00 GMT -5
He tricks his opponent into contravening article 73 of the UN security resolution, resulting in their arrest and subsequently getting counted out. Roman retains.
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tirtefaa
Unicron
If you wanna know the truth, you gotta dig up Johnny Booth.
Posts: 2,918
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Post by tirtefaa on Apr 20, 2023 13:06:21 GMT -5
Elimination Chamber
In a strange twist of circumstances, Roman's pod is the last to be opened, however a malfunction results in the pod not opening.
The match continues with the other competitors eliminating one another, while the ring crew attempt to get the pod open.
Nothing seems to work to get the pod open. Roman starts to freak out, shaking the pod violently, pounding on the plexiglass. The lone competitor left just stands awkwardly as the crew starts using a blowtorch.
The crew work frantically, but aren't able to get it to open.
Roman screams "Get me out of here!" as the show goes off the air.
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tirtefaa
Unicron
If you wanna know the truth, you gotta dig up Johnny Booth.
Posts: 2,918
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Post by tirtefaa on Apr 20, 2023 13:14:02 GMT -5
Hair vs Hair match against Ricochet
*wins by default
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Post by Hypnosis on Apr 20, 2023 14:52:28 GMT -5
Hair vs Hair match against Ricochet *wins by default Samantha Irvin:"HUH-ROMAAAANNNN....HUH-WHAT THE F***?!"
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tirtefaa
Unicron
If you wanna know the truth, you gotta dig up Johnny Booth.
Posts: 2,918
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Post by tirtefaa on Apr 20, 2023 22:22:43 GMT -5
First Blood match
Roman comes to the ring wearing a gas mask and a parka. Refuses to take it off.
Over the Top Rope Battle Royale
Roman wears magnetic boots as Heyman holds an oversized magnet underneath the ring, sliding him around.
HIAC Kennel match
During the match, Roman produces a flute and starts playing a melody. The dogs start following him around pied piper style, attacking his opponent on Roman's command.
Casket match
Opponent opens the casket, a bunch of dogs jump out. Roman starts playing his flute.
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Post by A Platypus Rave on Apr 20, 2023 22:32:43 GMT -5
after a grueling hour long match Roman Reigns superman punches his opponent in the dick...
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FHgrad99
Vegeta
Never mind that s***, here comes Mongo!
Posts: 9,027
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Post by FHgrad99 on Apr 21, 2023 13:08:59 GMT -5
Roman Reigns' opponent has the upper hand and suddenly Paul Heyman grabs a microphone and says that Roman Reigns' opponent is violating the Magna Carta and while his opponent is confused and trying to figure out what Heyman is talking about, Reigns gets up and spears his opponent for the win.
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Post by wildojinx on Apr 22, 2023 12:39:08 GMT -5
Roman is losing to his opponent. Suddenly, Paul Heyman pulls up the opponent's son/daughter's report card which happens to be mainly Ds and Fs. The opponent is so disapointed it gives Roman the advantage and lets him win.
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Post by hyperstorm on Apr 23, 2023 12:33:46 GMT -5
After weeks of interference Adam Pearce has barred any WWE talent from interfering in Roman's next title defense or they will be fired, Roman will be stripped of both titles and has taken the further precaution of having the rest of the Bloodline placed in a holding cell at the local jail. After a long and grueling match, the babyface is finally about to put Roman down for the three count when the ref is bumbed and suddenly four men in hoodies jump the babyface and beat him down, allowing Roman to pin him and retain. The four men remove the hoodies to reveal: Manu, Sean Maluta, Lance Anoa'i and Jacob Fatu. Since none of them work for the WWE, Roman retains the belts.
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Nr1Humanoid
Hank Scorpio
Is the #3 humanoid at best.
Posts: 5,526
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Post by Nr1Humanoid on Apr 23, 2023 12:56:25 GMT -5
Good idea, WWE sure has no clue beyond repetitive clichés.
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Mozenrath
FANatic
Foppery and Whim
Speedy Speed Boy
Posts: 121,204
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Post by Mozenrath on Apr 23, 2023 12:59:07 GMT -5
First Blood match. The ref is down and Roman starts squirting ketchup down the back of his opponent's trunks, then tells the ref the guy's ass exploded on an Atomic Drop.
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Post by Confused Mark Wahlberg on Apr 23, 2023 14:01:37 GMT -5
Roman is down for the three-count, but Heyman grabs the mic and says "Season 8 of Game of Thrones was the best one, convince me otherwise!". The face is so incensed by that foolish statement, that they are distracted enough for Roman to hit a Superman punch and win.
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Post by A Platypus Rave on Apr 23, 2023 14:11:24 GMT -5
Heyman gets on the mic and sings the DK Rap to the delight of the crowd.
Roman I dunno kicks his opponent in the dick or something while everyone is distracted.
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Post by wildojinx on Apr 23, 2023 16:47:34 GMT -5
Cody Rhodes beats Roman clean. While everyone's celebrating, suddenly, Cody picks up the mic, starts talking like Roman, and it's revealed that the two switched minds, and now Roman's mind is in Cody's body, meaning that Roman is still champion.
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J is Justice
Wade Wilson
Will now be grateful.
Hi.
Posts: 28,936
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Post by J is Justice on Apr 23, 2023 20:38:54 GMT -5
Just as Roman's about to lose, he starts a debate with his opponent about which Final Fantasy game is the best. Roman claims that it's XIII. His opponent - an FF VII fanboy - is so incensed by this that he unleashes a Supernova attack and destroys the entire universe. But as destroying the universe is against the rules, he is disqualified. And because Roman is dead, he can now never lose the titles.
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Post by Gerard Gerard on Apr 23, 2023 20:43:55 GMT -5
Jey Uso puts Rikishi's shades on the ref at the very last second and everyone's too distracted jiving away to notice the cover.
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FHgrad99
Vegeta
Never mind that s***, here comes Mongo!
Posts: 9,027
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Post by FHgrad99 on Apr 23, 2023 21:28:50 GMT -5
During the match, one of the referees runs to ringside with Roman Reigns' opponent's cell phone saying that he has a phone call. On the other end of the line is Roman Reigns wife pretending to be a scammer. While Roman's opponent is talking on the phone, Roman spears him and pins him.
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