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Post by -Lithium- on May 24, 2007 0:48:58 GMT -5
batista: i'd like to make a donation to the orphanage, please charity worker: that would be fantastic, how much would you like to donate? batty: i'm feeling generous. how about $5000? cw: (accepting cheque) thankyou mr. batista, its great to see someone of your status remembering what matters batty: you know, that's my money, and this sunday... i'm gonna be needing it back. *batistas music starts playing in the background, with micheal cole saying "strong words from the animal" over the top of it* lol, just picturing a bunch of little kid orphans running at Batista one by one and him spinebustering them...
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Jiren
Patti Mayonnaise
Hearts Bayformers
Posts: 35,163
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Post by Jiren on May 24, 2007 6:54:45 GMT -5
*Batista playing on Goldeneye multiplayer backstage (Golden gun), Batista has Golden Gun*
Shelton: Yes!!!, Gotcha i've got the GG
Batista: That Golden Gun you have, That's mine and Im gonna be needing it back
Shelton: I have it now, that's the point of the game
Batista: TEDDY!!!!!!!!
Teddy: For stealing the man's golden gun playa you will go ONE ON ONE WITH THE UNDERTAKER
Taker: F*** off i'm playing on this
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What?
Don Corleone
Mr. Money in Teh Banned.
Tu que pasa? You ain't even in my clasa.
Posts: 2,036
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Post by What? on May 24, 2007 8:38:45 GMT -5
*Batista playing on Goldeneye multiplayer backstage (Golden gun), Batista has Golden Gun* Shelton: Yes!!!, Gotcha i've got the GG Batista: That Golden Gun you have, That's mine and Im gonna be needing it back Shelton: I have it now, that's the point of the game Batista: TEDDY!!!!!!!! Teddy: For stealing the man's golden gun playa you will go ONE ON ONE WITH THE UNDERTAKER Taker: F*** off i'm playing on this LOL
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Post by Topher is Human on May 24, 2007 8:57:00 GMT -5
*Batista takes his car to an auto shop*
Batista: Take care of her, she's mine you know.
Mechanic: Alright, you should get it back by Monday.
Batista: OK cool, cyas
*walks off to another Mechanic*
See that car over there? That's mine and come Sunday... I'm taking it back!
Mechanic 2: Didn't he say Monday?
Batista: TEDDY!
Teddyt: Holla playa, quit drinkin the hatorade... for that you get to go-
Taker *interupting*: I know, I know... *walks up to the Mechanics and very dully chokeslams them before storming off murmering under his breath*
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What?
Don Corleone
Mr. Money in Teh Banned.
Tu que pasa? You ain't even in my clasa.
Posts: 2,036
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Post by What? on May 24, 2007 9:02:34 GMT -5
Where the hell did this TEDDY! thing come from?
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Post by Red 'n' Black Reggie on May 24, 2007 10:45:44 GMT -5
micheal cole: batista just gave edge the batista bomb! batista: you know edge, that batista bomb was mine, and this sunday... i'm gonna be needing it back.
*later*
excited child: did you see that, dad? on the way down to the ring, batista gave me a high-five!
*undertaker begins taping up fists*
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Sajoa Moe
Patti Mayonnaise
Did you get that thing I sent ya?
A man without gimmick.
Posts: 39,683
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Post by Sajoa Moe on May 24, 2007 10:59:57 GMT -5
Chef's Dad: Did I ever tell you childrens 'bout da time me and Ellie met Batista? We was at da Smackdown show, and he come up to us, he a big, scary, tattooed man, and he just lost his World Title, y'see. And he come on up to us, an' he look me straight in da eye, an' he said, "Imma need mah title back."
Chef's Mom: Need mah title back.
Chef's Dad: Well, it was 'bout dat time dat I realized dat dis weren't no Batista, but it was a two-story crustacean from da Mesozoic Period. So I said, "Damn you, monster! We ain't gonna give you no title back!" And den you know what happened? Teddy Long come up to us an' he said we got to go one-on-one wit' da Undatakah!
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Post by gsguy on May 24, 2007 11:14:32 GMT -5
(Cuts to Yugioh:The Abridged Series) Batista: You know that Blue Eyes White Dragon I gave you...well it's mine and I'm going to be needing it back Kaiba: Screw the rules, I have money! Batista: Mr. Long, I need help! (Teddy Long pops out of nowhere) Teddy: Hold on playa. You don't talk back to Dave like that. Now you're going to go one on one with...THE UNDERTAKAH! UNDERTAKAH, use ghoul power now! Taker: The things I do for money (Taker tombstones Blue Eyes and Last Ride's Kaiba) Yugi:This is so the opposite of super special awesome!
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SAJ Forth
Wade Wilson
Jamaican WCF Crazy!
Half Man-Half Amazing
Posts: 27,214
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Post by SAJ Forth on May 24, 2007 13:39:46 GMT -5
What if Batista was a stand-up comic?
Batista:Mencia that joke is mine, and I'am gonna be needing it back.
Mencia:DE DE DE!!!
Long:Mencia, you'll have to go one-on-one with...THE UNDATAKA!!!!
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Jiren
Patti Mayonnaise
Hearts Bayformers
Posts: 35,163
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Post by Jiren on May 24, 2007 13:45:08 GMT -5
*Batista is singing i lost my heart in San Fransisco*
Batista: Oh San Fransisco that's my heart and I'am gonna be needing it back.
*Obviously San Fran can't speak*
Batista: Oh playing dumb are we, TEDDY!!!!!!!!!!!
Teddy: San Fran You will go ONE ON ONE WITH THE UNDERTAKER
Taker: DO I F****** LOOK LIKE GODZILLA
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SAJ Forth
Wade Wilson
Jamaican WCF Crazy!
Half Man-Half Amazing
Posts: 27,214
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Post by SAJ Forth on May 24, 2007 14:18:38 GMT -5
Batista Giving Blood Batista:That blood is mine, and I'am gonna be needing it back. Nurse:But we've already put it into that sick child Batista:TEDDY!!!! Long:Sick Child, you will have to go one-on-one with... THE UNDATAKA!!!!
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edgehead
Dennis Stamp
Not a Poopyhead
Posts: 4,086
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Post by edgehead on May 24, 2007 14:35:02 GMT -5
*Batista pulls up to a resturant where there is Valet Parking**
Batisa: Here are my keys, and come this Sunday......I'm going to be needing them back.
Man: Actually sir, I'm just going to park your car over here..you can have it back as soon as you leave.
Teddy Long: Ohh, you done went and did it now! How about parking yourself in this ring tonight..because you are going one on one with....THE UNDERTAKAH!!!!!
Cole: THAT SICK PIRANA
*Taker's cell phone rings at home**
Taker: Not again....
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Post by Can you afford to pay me, Gah on May 24, 2007 20:53:11 GMT -5
It amazing how he would say this with very little emotion it. I think Batista should get that boring gimmick instead of Lance Storm who may I add was not boring. I could picture him as a kid doing the same thing. Little Batista : "I'll trade you my Ken Griffery Jr. Rookie card for your Greg Maddex? Friend: "Deal" (Switch cards) Little Batista: "That my Ken Griffery Jr Rookie card and I'm going to need that back." Friend: "We just traded, we had a deal." Little Batista "Well I'm still going to need it back." Friend : "No we traded so it mine now.' Little Batista: "MOM!!!!" Is his mom Teddy Long? Why not? It could be Teddy in drag. Teddy adopted him.
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Post by robnoxious on May 24, 2007 22:53:50 GMT -5
Batista in the backseat of a car after he just had sex for the first time Batista:That's my virginity you just took and on sunday I'm going to get it back. Girlfriend:But Dave that's impossible Batista:Teddy! Teddy: Megan you're going one on one with the Undatakah!
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on May 24, 2007 23:10:17 GMT -5
My biggest problem with WWE right now is this paint by numbers booking.
"I lost title, I want it Back!!!"
It's like it's being written by a 12 year old running an e-fed.
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The F'N Captain
King Koopa
I was captain **** till Captain America Beat the crap out of me and left me in a dumpster
Posts: 10,929
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Post by The F'N Captain on May 24, 2007 23:32:03 GMT -5
The truth comes out....
Batista- Hey Randy, I know you asked if you could crash in my room last night, but that's my door key and I'm gone to need that back....
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Post by Hobby Drifter on May 25, 2007 0:34:54 GMT -5
Batista: Undertaker, you may have beaten me at Wrestlemania, but that's my title and, this Sunday, I'm gonna be wanting it back.
Undertaker: *stares*
Batista: Oh, dead are ye? TEDDY?
Teddy: You won't just be playin' dead, uh, Playa! Because you're gonna go one on one with...The Undertaaaaah!
Undertaker: *shrugs* Grabs himself by the throat, pulls himself up, and drops himself to the canvas.
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What?
Don Corleone
Mr. Money in Teh Banned.
Tu que pasa? You ain't even in my clasa.
Posts: 2,036
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Post by What? on May 25, 2007 2:30:13 GMT -5
Batista: Undertaker, you may have beaten me at Wrestlemania, but that's my title and, this Sunday, I'm gonna be wanting it back. Undertaker: *stares* Batista: Oh, dead are ye? TEDDY? Teddy: You won't just be playin' dead, uh, Playa! Because you're gonna go one on one with...The Undertaaaaah! Undertaker: *shrugs* Grabs himself by the throat, pulls himself up, and drops himself to the canvas. ROFL
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Post by Red 'n' Black Reggie on May 25, 2007 10:46:20 GMT -5
*batista is at the bank*
batista: excuse me, i believe i deposited some money in my account. well, thats my money. and this sunday... i'm gonna be needing it back!
*batistas music starts to play, with cole talking in the background, before bank manager cuts him off*
bank manager: here you go, mr. batista, i believe you deposited $87.50. batista: but... you gave it back BM: well, you did ask for it. batista: yeah, but... um... you know... ah screw it, come on guys, we're going!
*teddy long and undertaker come out from hiding behind two cash machines, looking disapointed*
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Jiren
Patti Mayonnaise
Hearts Bayformers
Posts: 35,163
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Post by Jiren on May 25, 2007 10:58:44 GMT -5
*Batista at church confession*
Preist: The lord has taken away your sins
*Dave looks up at the sky*
Batista: Those sins you took away, those are my sins and I'm gonna be wanting them back.
*silence*
Batista: Oohh Silent type are we, TEDDY!!!!!
Teddy: GOD!!! you will go ONE ON ONE WITH THE UNDERTAKER
Taker: No God damn it, Just NO
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