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Post by Asics Johnson on Jun 13, 2007 13:01:29 GMT -5
I was there, too. Me and Ape both had ringside seats, personally authorized by The Russian Lion himself. He made sure we were both there to see him wipe the floor with Frank Gotch and his crappy high society clothing line. Boy, did he. I blinked, and when I opened my eyes again, ol' George had already pulled Frankie's spine through his throat. Then, he replaced the spine, revived Frank, and then pulled his spine from his a**hole.
Gotch's "win" was nothing but a fabricated story to get Hackenschmidt off the hook for what the federalies like to call capital murder.
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Post by ape on Jun 13, 2007 13:07:14 GMT -5
I was there, too. Me and Ape both had ringside seats, personally authorized by The Russian Lion himself. He made sure we were both there to see him wipe the floor with Frank Gotch and his crappy high society clothing line. Boy, did he. I blinked, and when I opened my eyes again, ol' George had already pulled Frankie's spine through his throat. Then, he replaced the spine, revived Frank, and then pulled his spine from his a**hole. Gotch's "win" was nothing but a fabricated story to get Hackenschmidt off the hook for what the federalies like to call capital murder. exactly. i didn't want to tip off the feds for hackenschmidt's actions...but that is, indeed, what happened. did i mention that hackenschmidt is the reason the titanic sank? one punch to the side and it sunk faster than rob conway's push.
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Post by FrankGotch on Jun 13, 2007 13:15:46 GMT -5
You guys are right the history books are mistaken. they say I only beat Hackenschmit twice. I actually beat him three times because our second match was a best of three falls.
Know what I did after I got done with my epic win over Hackenschmit? I held Thomas Edison in a headlock until he invented the first mobile phone then I made George call his whole family, once they showed up I humbled all of them at the same time right there in front of 90,000,000 people.
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Aunt Blabby Tells All.
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Post by ape on Jun 13, 2007 13:43:40 GMT -5
aha! that's where your facts are flawed, mr. gotch....back then there weren't even 90,000,000 people in the world. there was 26 total. and hackenschmidt beat the tar outta all of us....and he made frank gotch wear a frilled bonnet afterward....'cause he was a big baby about losing.
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Post by Asics Johnson on Jun 13, 2007 14:08:10 GMT -5
Then he took Gotch's mother, Dorothy Gotch, out for a nice seafood dinner... and he never called her again.
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Post by FrankGotch on Jun 13, 2007 14:11:04 GMT -5
Your right except you really underestimated my drawing power, back from 1900 untill my death I drew so well that God personally created 900,000,000,000 people just to watch me kick the crap outta that no talent Russian hack.
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Post by FrankGotch on Jun 13, 2007 14:13:24 GMT -5
Then he took Gotch's mother, Dorothy Gotch, out for a nice seafood dinner... and he never called her again. Oh yeah well humbled Hacks entire family and I didn't even cuddle with them afterwards.
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Post by Arturo Classico on Jun 13, 2007 14:50:45 GMT -5
You know guys you never even saw Frank Gotch, The Great Gama, Ed Lewis or Georg Hackenschmidt! How about talk about wrestlers you've seen! Thats right i will talk about guys i watched.
One is Owen Hart, the greatest of the Harts! A criminal shame that he never won the world title. He was more charismatic than his more successful brother and was a better wrestler! He was phenominal and put on some of the best matches I've ever seen! he would bitch slap Lewis into the ground and make him tap out to the Sharpshooter!
Than there is Chris Benoit who wrestled the most styles of any wrestler ever! He wrestled in Europe, Japan, Mexico, and America! Thats something Frank Gotch was scared to do! The opponents he faced was amazing. Liger, Sasuke, Guerrero, Malenko, Hartr, HHH, The Rock, Angle, Mysterio, Sabu, Jericho, Storm, Taz, Snow, and Stone Cold. Name great opponents Gotch faced? Hackenschmidt? Thats probaly it! Benoit would cripple Gotch!
Than we have a true legitamate wrestler! A Man who wrestled with a broken frickin neck! A Man that one olympic gold and held every major title in wrestling! This man is Kurt Angle! A Man who beat the best! Angle is greater than Gotch and Hackenshmidt combined! Did they ever win olympic gold? No! Did they ever have to face tough opponents like Angle did? Did they have to endure the Hell in A Cell? Face kane? Brock Lesnar? So f*** those piece of shits! Angle is the man and Hackenschmidt couldn't hold his jock strap!
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Post by Asics Johnson on Jun 13, 2007 15:07:17 GMT -5
Hackenschmidt beat Owen Hart, Chris Benoit, and Kurt Angle all in the same night at the same time while he was having a 125 degree fever. I was there.
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Post by ape on Jun 13, 2007 15:10:51 GMT -5
Hackenschmidt beat Owen Hart, Chris Benoit, and Kurt Angle all in the same night at the same time while he was having a 125 degree fever. I was there. i was, too....he would cough up his internal organs during the match, then stuff them back down his own throat to continue on in the match. you know how difficult it is to stuff your large intestines back into your body through your mouth...and to place them in the correct area of the body to boot? hackenschmidt did it. he's like a doctor...except about 75% smarter.
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Post by Arturo Classico on Jun 13, 2007 15:12:43 GMT -5
Hackenschmidt beat Owen Hart, Chris Benoit, and Kurt Angle all in the same night at the same time while he was having a 125 degree fever. I was there. That would be amazing since hackenshmidt died in the 60's and Hart and Benoit debuted in the 80's and Angle in the ninties!
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Post by Asics Johnson on Jun 13, 2007 15:15:03 GMT -5
Hackenschmidt is an amazing man. What more can I say?
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Post by ape on Jun 13, 2007 15:15:45 GMT -5
Hackenschmidt beat Owen Hart, Chris Benoit, and Kurt Angle all in the same night at the same time while he was having a 125 degree fever. I was there. That would be amazing since hackenshmidt died in the 60's and Hart and Benoit debuted in the 80's and Angle in the ninties! that's what hackenschmidt wants you to believe...he's still alive and well and could beat the tar out of anyone. i remember watching him beat up boogeyman for stealing his fishin' worms...hackenschmidt told boogs that he was comin' to get him and, i kid you not, boogeyman was so scared that he pooped his pants....and that's how little boogeyman was born.
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Post by Asics Johnson on Jun 13, 2007 15:18:37 GMT -5
George Hackenschmidt defeated God in an MMA bout last December, lest we forget.
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Post by Old School Heel mark4Morishima on Jun 13, 2007 15:19:28 GMT -5
Hackenschmidt once broke into my house and started sniffing my socks while I was asleep. Then he kicked me in the nuts. While I was weeping like a small child, Hack told me about how he beat up Steve Austin and Owen Hart after he had sustained a pump-action shotgun blast to the chest, neck and breasts area.
After that to make it up to me he went in the kitchen and made me the best vanilla smoothie evar!
The next week we found out my sister was pregnant.
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Post by Arturo Classico on Jun 13, 2007 15:19:35 GMT -5
George Hackenschmidt defeated God in an MMA bout last December, lest we forget. He couldn't beat Lesnar! F-5 and it would be over!
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Post by Asics Johnson on Jun 13, 2007 15:21:52 GMT -5
No, he beat Lesnar too. He defeated him in a NCAA match in West Haverbrook once.
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Aunt Blabby Tells All.
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Post by ape on Jun 13, 2007 15:25:25 GMT -5
No, he beat Lesnar too. He defeated him in a NCAA match in West Haverbrook once. i remember that....that was awesome. hackenschmidt destroyed him. i still remember the graceful double stomp after the bout was over....and hackenschmidt threatening the referee after the ref claimed he would reverse his decision....needless to say, one uppercut later, and we had a decapitated ref and the greatest wrestler EVER banned from the ncaa for the rest of his days.
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Post by Asics Johnson on Jun 13, 2007 15:28:21 GMT -5
What about the time he was supposed to be revealed as the Greater Power on Raw a while back, but Vince double crossed him and played the part himself?
I think we all saw Hackenschmidt get his payback this past Monday.
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Post by Arturo Classico on Jun 13, 2007 15:30:43 GMT -5
Man It's pretty pathetic that you're trying to make a guy you have never seen seem like the greatest ever. I mean really what the hell?
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