Things you wish were socially acceptable

[Dr. T is an alien]

I definitely see your point (and in fact agree with you), but we all need to learn to disagree with one another WITHOUT saying horrible things about each other. Everyone has different opinions and they all most likely did not come to those conclusions because they are cartoon characters whose names describe their attitudes (Grumpy the Dwarf, Jokey Smurf, and Hoggish Greedly all come to mind). If you cannot disagree with one another respectfully, you can never expect to have meaningful discussions about your disagreements. After all, would you bother considering the words of someone who needlessly insults you?

[CMPunkyBrewster]

May 2, 2017 16:33:43 GMT -5 Dr. T is an alien said:

I definitely see your point (and in fact agree with you), but we all need to learn to disagree with one another WITHOUT saying horrible things about each other. Everyone has different opinions and they all most likely did not come to those conclusions because they are cartoon characters whose names describe their attitudes (Grumpy the Dwarf, Jokey Smurf, and Hoggish Greedly all come to mind). If you cannot disagree with one another respectfully, you can never expect to have meaningful discussions about your disagreements. After all, would you bother considering the words of someone who needlessly insults you?

I'm sorry, but that dude is a perfect example of why we can't have nice things in this country.

[Gus Richlen: Ruffian]

I don't see this thread lasting too long at this rate.

[Deleted]

Guys being allowed to feel sexy too.

Males are always deemed as disugusting or nasty when they show some skin or wear sexy clothing. Even if they aren't super hairy and have baby smooth skin.

Another would be guitar based music. If you listen to rock or blues or metal, or what have you...you are seen as weird and out of line by the majority. Yet just as little as 15 years ago, it was the norm. Especially the 80's/early 90's, it was the spearhead of music (rock, metal, etc)

I don't care if it's being played in Pepsi commericals or whatever, I just want to not have dirty looks or be accused of being a evil devil worshipper just I listen to a certain type music.

[ShaolinHandLock]

I've been debating with myself whether to post in this thread or not since it started (especially since I said in another thread that I might not post on the forums again) but I'm here now, so screw it.

My main things that I often wish were socially acceptable are the music I listen to, the majority of which is rap/hip hop and black metal. Now I get why they're not, but I'd just like to be able to enjoy the music I like without feeling guilty about it, you know?

Hell, I've even thought about posting a lot of black metal in the metal thread here, as well as posting underground/horrorcore/obscure rap in the hip-hop thread, but I don't want the backlash or negative reactions, so I don't bother.

May 2, 2017 16:33:43 GMT -5 Dr. T is an alien said:

I definitely see your point (and in fact agree with you), but we all need to learn to disagree with one another WITHOUT saying horrible things about each other. Everyone has different opinions and they all most likely did not come to those conclusions because they are cartoon characters whose names describe their attitudes (Grumpy the Dwarf, Jokey Smurf, and Hoggish Greedly all come to mind). If you cannot disagree with one another respectfully, you can never expect to have meaningful discussions about your disagreements. After all, would you bother considering the words of someone who needlessly insults you?

Agreed. I've said this type of thing in the past, and I completely believe that most pointless internet arguments wouldn't happen if people could just calm down and respectfully disagree with each other.

[Alexander The So-so]

-I'll second trenchcoats.

-Wearing leather jackets and vests when you a). do not ride a motorcycle and b.) don't have any fetishes.

-Being more honest and open about every day negative emotions. One of the biggest things in American culture that annoys me is our habit of walking by people, cheerfully saying "hi, how are you?" and walking along right away because, to be honest, a lot of us don't truly care about each other's wellbeing. Responding to the "how are you" question by honestly answering "well, I'm actually pretty scared and depressed lately, because my mom's sick and in the hospital, and I'm worried my job is going to lay me off, and..." would get you weird stares. Let's be more honest and open about the fact that life isn't always fantastic and that part of being human is dealing with sad and depresssing things.

[HMARK Center]

May 1, 2017 5:03:00 GMT -5 Malibu Stacy said:

Non monogamous relationships. I wish they were understood better. Too many people seem to think it comes down to either monogamy, not interested in dating, or just want to bang everyone and everything with no emotional involvement. Or that people who prefer non monogamy want EVERYONE to abandon monogamy. Or that all non monogamous situations are built on a foundation of cheating and/or deceit. (Seriously, SCREW people who insist on always referring to unconventional relationships as "cheating on each other" after being explicitly told everyone involved is knowingly consenting!)

Personally, if I wasn't with my current boyfriend, my ideal situation would be friends with benefits. "Friends" is the key word here, NOT the same as booty calls. Which, if everyone involved is a a knowledgeable, willing participant, should be equally accepted. My best friend prefers a structure where he is involved with two women simultaneously, and they each are involved with him and, if they choose, one more person. Then of course there's all sorts of different types of open relationships, with all sorts of different rules. But really, instead of number of people involved, it should come down to honesty and consideration for the needs of each individual.

I know, it seems like a silly thing to complain about, but I feel like the social pressure to only pursue monogamy or pursue nothing contributed to a lot of the emotional issues I deal with today. Repeatedly, I would get close to someone, only to be told some variation of "be my girlfriend, or lose me forever". And me being me, I would, because I can't stand to lose people, even toxic people. So I would date them, be unfulfilled, then eventually depressed. The best part was, almost every one of those guys who forced a monogamous relationship with me just ended up cheating on me relentlessly.

And yeah, I said guys, because funny thing? In spite of the stereotypes, girls I liked never tried to guilt me into a monogamous relationship. They either were down to try it, or just expressed lack of interest and life moved on.

To anyone who actually read this, thank you, and sorry for the rant. I just keep seeing all these memes all over social media "the older I get, the more I realize I don't want to go out and party, I just want to settle down with my partner" "how come no one just wants cuddle up and brace for the long haul, why does everyone want to just be playing?" etc. It makes me feel like society believes people like me should be vilified.

And then I get depressed

I hear you; I'm a classic over-thinker on stuff, and as I hit traditional "marrying age" I'd start over-thinking the nature of relationships, marriage, childrearing, etc., and it gets frustrating to realize you may have different values from the mainstream on it.

Personally, I'm someone who's comfortable with open relationships; cheating has never much impacted me in the way it might others, but it's hard to explain that to people without being seen as somehow strange. I have no problem whatsoever with monogamy, as it's not for me to tell people what should make them happy or satisfied in life, but I think a key reason (certainly not the only one) why many people aren't happy in their relationships or why divorce rates can get so high is that people are told "THIS is how you're supposed to live the major points of your life, now fit this mold."

Consider dating and relationships: a monogamous relationship can be very difficult, as you're asking someone to be not only your friend, but also your business partner, the person who makes you laugh, your work partner on various projects, the person you'd be willing to raise a child (or more than one) with, someone to share a bed and home with, you want them to have some similar interests, you need them to be a confidant to your deepest feelings and secrets...and they have to be the only person you're going to engage in romantic physical intimacy for the rest of your life. Almost sounds crazy, doesn't it? Obviously it isn't, lots of people make it work and are very happy, but it's an insane amount of work, effort, and needs to fill for something that some people engage in because "That's just what you do."

And childrearing, at least the way we do it in a lot of western society? Holy crap, two of you on your own, very little to no help, losing hours of sleep a night and having to get back to work very early in the child's life, and with a price tag attached of about $250,000 from ages 0-17 to give the kid just an average, decent upbringing. Again, almost sounds nuts, right? But so very, very many people have kids because "That's just what you do."

Again, obviously, this isn't to bash having kids; I would probably like to have a child at some point. My larger issue is that these are major, life altering, society shaping decisions that carry a very real failure rate and demand a certain mold of living that not everybody can fit into so easily, yet we seemingly take for granted that it's just the natural next step people are supposed to take. I really wish things like that were reconsidered...along with the stupid commercials that try to tell 30-somethings like me that having a family and a kid means you automatically have to buy a minivan/SUV and move to the suburbs, because what the hell is that all about?

Meanwhile, with regards to relationships, some of the happiest and most contented people I've known on that front have been to swingers parties (clean, safe sex/verbal consent only ones, of course). With having and raising kids, there's a very real argument to be made that multi-generational family homes or more communal living with non-blood relatives would have a very positive impact on the lives of both parents and kids, giving parents more help and room to breathe and giving the kids a larger support network and wider community to associate with. And yet...well, "that's just not how you're supposed to do it."

So yeah, if monogamy and a traditional nuclear family makes somebody happy, absolutely they should pursue that and enjoy the hell out of it, because it's a way of living that has plenty of wonderful things to offer. I just argue that such structures shouldn't be taken as so natural, such a given, and other ideas or different lifestyles should be seen as somehow deviant or otherwise "unnatural". Heck, the nuclear family lifestyle of Mom, Dad, 2.5 kids and a white picket fence is a decidedly recent (as in, less than 100 year old) creation. I know the easy answer is "just get into an open relationship" or something, but it's really not quite that simple, given how few people are honestly open to the idea and the judgments that come with doing things outside what's considered the norm.

[aka Cthulhu]

Wearing socks with flip-flops/sandals/slippers. Dammit, my ankles hurt when I wear shoes too long, and I like to be comfy.

[The Unconquered Sun]

[Agreed. I've said this type of thing in the past, and I completely believe that most pointless internet arguments wouldn't happen if people could just calm down and respectfully disagree with each other.[/quote][
See, there's hope you yet 😃

[Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!!]

May 2, 2017 11:12:09 GMT -5 Dr. T is an alien said:

Apr 17, 2017 10:40:56 GMT -5 FinalGwen said:

It would be nice to be able to be freer with gender presentation without having to worry about transphobic arseholes.

This. I f***ing want this.

My youngest is transgendered and fell into a depression when that bullshit about bathrooms came out. We had just gotten him to feel normal and those assholes undid that through their bigotry.

That, and it made use of public bathrooms a thing again. I now find myself quietly freaking out anytime he uses a public men's room.

I mean, he came out early enough to us that we could start hormone treatment at a young enough age that he just looks like a boy younger than he actually is, but I still find myself worrying. I should not have to do that shit.

I'll glom onto this a bit and say in my belief we shouldn't even HAVE gender specific bathrooms anymore. I mean chances are you share a toilet at hoe with people of other genders, why sold public restrooms be any different? we're all doing the same things in there.

[Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!!]

May 3, 2017 7:32:05 GMT -5 ShaolinHandLock said:

I've been debating with myself whether to post in this thread or not since it started (especially since I said in another thread that I might not post on the forums again) but I'm here now, so screw it.

My main things that I often wish were socially acceptable are the music I listen to, the majority of which is rap/hip hop and black metal. Now I get why they're not, but I'd just like to be able to enjoy the music I like without feeling guilty about it, you know?

Hell, I've even thought about posting a lot of black metal in the metal thread here, as well as posting underground/horrorcore/obscure rap in the hip-hop thread, but I don't want the backlash or negative reactions, so I don't bother.

May 2, 2017 16:33:43 GMT -5 Dr. T is an alien said:

I definitely see your point (and in fact agree with you), but we all need to learn to disagree with one another WITHOUT saying horrible things about each other. Everyone has different opinions and they all most likely did not come to those conclusions because they are cartoon characters whose names describe their attitudes (Grumpy the Dwarf, Jokey Smurf, and Hoggish Greedly all come to mind). If you cannot disagree with one another respectfully, you can never expect to have meaningful discussions about your disagreements. After all, would you bother considering the words of someone who needlessly insults you?

Agreed. I've said this type of thing in the past, and I completely believe that most pointless internet arguments wouldn't happen if people could just calm down and respectfully disagree with each other.

dude there's way too much Power Metal in the metal thread, feel free to throw in something different

[ShaolinHandLock]

May 4, 2017 5:46:11 GMT -5 Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!! said:

May 3, 2017 7:32:05 GMT -5 ShaolinHandLock said:

I've been debating with myself whether to post in this thread or not since it started (especially since I said in another thread that I might not post on the forums again) but I'm here now, so screw it.

My main things that I often wish were socially acceptable are the music I listen to, the majority of which is rap/hip hop and black metal. Now I get why they're not, but I'd just like to be able to enjoy the music I like without feeling guilty about it, you know?

Hell, I've even thought about posting a lot of black metal in the metal thread here, as well as posting underground/horrorcore/obscure rap in the hip-hop thread, but I don't want the backlash or negative reactions, so I don't bother.

Agreed. I've said this type of thing in the past, and I completely believe that most pointless internet arguments wouldn't happen if people could just calm down and respectfully disagree with each other.

dude there's way too much Power Metal in the metal thread, feel free to throw in something different

I forgot about this.

I would, but I don't want to offend anyone, so I'll need to know exactly what I can and can't post in there.

[Dub H]

May 1, 2017 12:29:32 GMT -5 Alice Syndrome said:

I want people to stop shaming others for compulsions or coping methods.

Don't like me biting my nails? Then stop shaming me for using my tangle, my spinner, or tapping my feet. I'm glad my department at work allows me stimming, but I've heard of schools taking spinners off people, which is bs.

I don't have that problem often. Usually at work i'm just sitting tapping my feet.

My my mother already freaked out because I can't stay quiet in place or when i'm up i can't stand still.And it annoys the f*** of me. Just let me move.

[Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!!]

May 10, 2017 6:10:52 GMT -5 ShaolinHandLock said:

May 4, 2017 5:46:11 GMT -5 Baldobomb-22-OH-MAN!!! said:

dude there's way too much Power Metal in the metal thread, feel free to throw in something different

I forgot about this.

I would, but I don't want to offend anyone, so I'll need to know exactly what I can and can't post in there.

well as long as it's not Nazi bands I think you'll be fine

[Xxcjb01xX [PIECE OF: SH-]]

May 1, 2017 9:32:24 GMT -5 crabbymelt said:

Drinking soda.

I don't like wine and I'm not really into beer. I'll drink liquor occasionally. But I love soda, and people make it a mission to "shame" me for my "childish" drink choices. Who freaking cares? I'm paying for a drink I actually like, and can afford!

Wow, that's terrible. Never happened to me yet but I don't really go out to bars because I don't drink period. Food Places with Alcohal though I've been to, just gotten Coke or Pepsi, whatever one they carry, never gotten a weird look. Maybe that's because I'm also with my friends usually but jeez that just sounds terrible. I'd rather drink soda than get wasted or get a hangover thanks...

[Xxcjb01xX [PIECE OF: SH-]]

May 2, 2017 16:33:43 GMT -5 Dr. T is an alien said:

I definitely see your point (and in fact agree with you), but we all need to learn to disagree with one another WITHOUT saying horrible things about each other. Everyone has different opinions and they all most likely did not come to those conclusions because they are cartoon characters whose names describe their attitudes (Grumpy the Dwarf, Jokey Smurf, and Hoggish Greedly all come to mind). If you cannot disagree with one another respectfully, you can never expect to have meaningful discussions about your disagreements. After all, would you bother considering the words of someone who needlessly insults you?

I PREACH this on my Facebook Page. I do nothing but preach civil conversation and overall agreeing to disagree.

I hate when people come on the page and purposefully flame bait people with a "___ Sucks", "___ is Trash", and some of the worst is "If you like ___ youre retarded/autistic", that shit doesn't fly with me and you clearly don't have an argument on why the show sucks, you're just trying to derail things and ruin it for everyone.

Explain calmly and civilly why you don't like something whether it's a movie, animation, etc., because doing stuff like the above just leads to people starting a war in comments that is just one giant waste of time, hence why they usually get banned

 

[Xxcjb01xX [PIECE OF: SH-]]

I'd say this has become way more socially acceptable over the past decade or so but people should NEVER be shamed for loving Animation and Cartoons

As someone who runs a big Animation Page which is nearing 100k followers, I've gotten people who call my page and others a safe haven from their reality. People their age or even their friends, mock them for liking certain cartoons like Steven Universe. And no they haven't actually sat down and watched them, they just mock them because they see Cartoons as something for Kids or "Baby Stuff" to grow out of.

And the people who do that, without being respectable mind you, are the worst people in my eyes. Some people who literally take a giant dump on the Animation Industry, which is made up of grown ups mind you which some of these people forget. Guys and Gals who work hard animating, writing, boarding, and putting out quality animation. Also on that topic, when an animated show sucks, and it gets criticism for sucking like any piece of media, these same people will go "Oh it's for kids it shouldn't matter to you, it's supposed to suck because we aren't supposed to GET IT", grow up! The people who use that argument drive me insane because it's NOT an argument, and the same applies to the people who actually mock others for loving Animation.

Animation is a UNIVERSAL property. The Movies get sometimes Hundreds of Millions of Dollars, and that's not just by Disney anymore. 2016 was Animations BEST YEAR EVER in cinema at the Box Office. It's an ever growing medium that doesn't talk down to any age and never has if you watch Disney, Looney Tunes, Tom and Jerry, etc. Cartoons are for everyone and should be given the effort for just that and should be appreciated for just that. And thankfully, they are by a wide margin of people. But those who don't, who SINK that low and want to call themselves peoples "Friends" in the process. If you're their friend, you'd give what they watch a chance or at least respect them.

It's a heated thing for me, I have friends in that industry, I've talked to the creators of mainstream animated shows on both Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network, and people being inconsiderate dicks about it and making other people feel ashamed for liking Cartoons at any age makes me wanna punch a wall... thankfully, it's shrinking by the year.

[Allie Kitsune]

Apr 22, 2017 21:51:59 GMT -5 xCompackx said:

I think the idea of public nudity is more appealing than the reality of it. Consider anything you might sit on that's not in your home (park benches, bus/subway/plane/train seats, any kind of chair, etc.) and then consider how pleasant those things would be with people sitting their bare asses on them. Not to mention bugs, constant sun screen, people staring, and how cold everything would be. Which, ironically, would have equally bad reactions for men and women.

Bare asses in food establishments seem like they should be a MASSIVE health code violation.

[Malibu Stacy]

May 1, 2017 9:32:24 GMT -5 crabbymelt said:

Drinking soda.

I don't like wine and I'm not really into beer. I'll drink liquor occasionally. But I love soda, and people make it a mission to "shame" me for my "childish" drink choices. Who freaking cares? I'm paying for a drink I actually like, and can afford!

Definitely noticed this weird trend. Hell, at my recent retail job, people would show up drunk or high or hungover all the time, but as long as they showed up and kept screw ups to a minimum, nobody really called attention to it. Oh, but bust out a diet soda in the break room? Suddenly every person turns into a certified nutritionist who believes you are just dying to hear their thoughts on soda, and how it's been almost a decade since soda last passed betwixt their lips.

[fw91]

Wearing jean shorts. Like I won't wear them to a bar or nice place or anything, but they're f***ing comfortable and the pockets are clutch in terms of keeping your phone and wallet secure.