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Post by herodotus6 on Nov 16, 2010 6:50:39 GMT -5
...The Michelin Man, who starts shooting tires out of his stomach and lassoing the members of Nexus with them. He saves Wade Barrett for last and just as he is about to strike someone yells out, "Not so fast!". Everyone turns around to find that its...
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Raging_Demons
Don Corleone
I Can Ride My Bike With No Handlebars, No Handlebars, No Handlebars!
Posts: 1,620
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Post by Raging_Demons on Nov 16, 2010 21:27:02 GMT -5
"The Sith Lord" himself Chris Jericho. Jericho uses The Force to free his apprentice Wade Barrett & flings The Michelin Man & Vincent Price out of the arena.
*commercials*
We're back & all the previous RAW GMs are in the ring: "Darth" Y2J" Chris Jericho, Triple H, Wigglytuff, "The Delightful Kids From McMahon Lane" (Triple H & Stephanie McMahon's Kids: Aurora Rose, Murphy Claire, & Unknown Baby known as "Baby X". Shane McMahon's Kids: Denton James, Kenyon Jesse), Vickie Guerrero, & Hornswoggle. Hornswoggle doesn't know why he's here but thanks to getting hit in the head from a table by Jerry "The King" Lawler, he's back as Preston Swogg.
The Raw GM Laptop (via Michael Cole) announces that he's going to retire soon & all of the previous GMs are up for the job. Whomever survives gets the job.
Just as everybody is about to attack, a new person arrives on the stage to fight for the RAW GM Job, and it's...
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Post by DSR on Nov 16, 2010 22:15:05 GMT -5
...DEE SNIDER from Twisted Sister! He runs to the ring, the lights go out for a minute, and when they come back on...
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Post by fuzzywarble, squat cobbler on Nov 16, 2010 22:24:34 GMT -5
...Scotty 2 Hotty is standing in the ring, having just defacated all over himself.
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Raging_Demons
Don Corleone
I Can Ride My Bike With No Handlebars, No Handlebars, No Handlebars!
Posts: 1,620
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Post by Raging_Demons on Nov 16, 2010 22:40:17 GMT -5
Because Scotty 2 Hotty just saw Mae Young naked...again..."pleasuring herself"!
Back to the ring.
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Post by DSR on Nov 16, 2010 22:43:59 GMT -5
Because Scotty 2 Hotty just saw Mae Young naked...again..."pleasuring herself"! Back to the ring. Where all the former GMs are vomiting from hearing Scotty's story. They all forfeit the match, and thus the position of Raw GM is awarded to...
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Raging_Demons
Don Corleone
I Can Ride My Bike With No Handlebars, No Handlebars, No Handlebars!
Posts: 1,620
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Post by Raging_Demons on Nov 16, 2010 23:00:13 GMT -5
Dee Snider since he's the only guy left & is not a former GM.
Dee Snider announces that "We're Not Going TO Take It Anymore!"
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Nov 16, 2010 23:00:48 GMT -5
Kizarny! But it's not just any Kizarny. This is a Kizarny who has absorbed the power of the Pit of Future Endeavours. He is now known instead as... Gizod. Gizod then decrees in a loud booming voice in his horrible manner of speech that itiz tizime fizor isa nizew ordizer herize iniz thize WWizE.
After everyone brains suffer simultaneous meltdowns, Gizod declares his first act as GM to be...
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Post by DSR on Nov 16, 2010 23:16:30 GMT -5
Kizarny! But it's not just any Kizarny. This is a Kizarny who has absorbed the power of the Pit of Future Endeavours. He is now known instead as... Gizod. Gizod then decrees in a loud booming voice in his horrible manner of speech that itiz tizime fizor isa nizew ordizer herize iniz thize WWizE. After everyone brains suffer simultaneous meltdowns, Gizod declares his first act as GM to be... bringing back "THE ROCK!" Yes, Don Muraco shows up, and he's gonna have a match tonight against...
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,519
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Nov 16, 2010 23:25:47 GMT -5
"Sith Lord" Chris Jericho, who loses in 0.00000000000000000000000001 seconds after tripping over his sholaces. In his anger, he accidentally fast counts himself before flinging himself through the Spanish announce table.
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Post by DSR on Nov 16, 2010 23:26:21 GMT -5
"Sith Lord" Chris Jericho, who loses in 0.00000000000000000000000001 seconds after tripping over his sholaces. In his anger, he accidentally fast counts himself before flinging himself through the Spanish announce table. There were no survivors.
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,519
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Nov 16, 2010 23:27:44 GMT -5
Divalution then enters with the Stone Of Triumph!!!!
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Raging_Demons
Don Corleone
I Can Ride My Bike With No Handlebars, No Handlebars, No Handlebars!
Posts: 1,620
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Post by Raging_Demons on Nov 16, 2010 23:52:57 GMT -5
Since all the members of Divaultion are naked while dragging the Stone Of Triumph out, RAW's Ratings went up 1 BILLION points!
Which causes John Cena's head to explode & Johnny Ace to die due to massive exposure to hot naked female bodies!
Jerry "The King" Lawler responds by...
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Post by DSR on Nov 17, 2010 0:00:30 GMT -5
Since all the members of Divaultion are naked while dragging the Stone Of Triumph out, RAW's Ratings went up 1 BILLION points! Which causes John Cena's head to explode & Johnny Ace to die due to massive exposure to hot naked female bodies! Jerry "The King" Lawler responds by... ...masterbating furiously! Which, isn't allowed on television (and nobody wanted to see it anyway), so he's promptly escorted out of the building. His replacement at commentary is...
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Post by herodotus6 on Nov 17, 2010 1:00:30 GMT -5
...Ernest, who immediately gets on Cole's nerves by nudging him and saying "Know what I mean, Verne?" after every sentence.
After several times being called Verne, Cole screams out, "I'm not Verne Gagne!". Ernest looks at him puzzled and asks, "Who?".
Cole's head explodes.
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,519
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Nov 17, 2010 1:04:58 GMT -5
The naked members of Divalution then announces that they're taking over Raw. None of the fans are listening, of course.
The first thing Divalution does is ban Jericho from the building. Jericho attempts to use his Sith powers but Trish simply kicks him off the apron.
And then a horde of Clefairies arrives with a message from Wigglytuff:
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Post by DSR on Nov 17, 2010 2:18:30 GMT -5
The naked members of Divalution then announces that they're taking over Raw. None of the fans are listening, of course. The first thing Divalution does is ban Jericho from the building. Jericho attempts to use his Sith powers but Trish simply kicks him off the apron. And then a horde of Clefairies arrives with a message from Wigglytuff: "I have no idea what's going on." So we go back to the ring, where Jimmy Fallon and Horatio Sanz are breaking character and laughing for a minute and a half. The Clefaires decide this isn't worth their time, and drive off in an SUV. And Wigglytuff decides to haul ass to Lollapalooza! Back to ringside, Kaval is in the midst of a match with...
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MrBRulzOK
Wade Wilson
Mr No-Pants Heathen
Something Witty Here.
Posts: 26,719
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Post by MrBRulzOK on Nov 17, 2010 2:25:32 GMT -5
Low Ki! However, as soon as the two enter the ring they both vanish in yet another rip in the space time continuum. Sadly this surprises nobody at this point. Gizod suddenly appears atop the Titantron and declares that he thankfully has a back up match in mind. Thus comes out...
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Post by DSR on Nov 17, 2010 2:31:17 GMT -5
Low Ki! However, as soon as the two enter the ring they both vanish in yet another rip in the space time continuum. Sadly this surprises nobody at this point. Gizod suddenly appears atop the Titantron and declares that he thankfully has a back up match in mind. Thus comes out... Kane, Fake Diesel, Isaac Yankem, and the Christmas Creature for a 4-way elimination match! Gizod takes the microphone again and says, "Alright, hold it everybody! You know what?..."
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Gus Richlen Was Wrong
Patti Mayonnaise
Metal Maestro: Co-winner of the FAN Idol Throwdown!
Fun while it lasted
Posts: 38,519
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Post by Gus Richlen Was Wrong on Nov 17, 2010 22:51:19 GMT -5
"Divalution is still naked. Oh, and the Clefairies are back with a bus full of Slowpokes and sledgehammers."
This causes Triple H to run to the ring and start breakdancing for no reason.
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