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Post by viscera on Dec 20, 2005 10:08:42 GMT -5
Samoa Joe only looks fat to lull his opponents into a false sense of security. If he was all buff, he would scare everyone around him away
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Post by Z-A Sandbaggin' Son of a b!%@h on Dec 20, 2005 10:19:29 GMT -5
Macgyver can build an airplane out of gum and paper clips, but Samoa Joe can kill him and take it.
Samoa Joe doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Samoa Joe has recently changed his middle name to "f***ing."
In the movie "Back to the Future" they used Samoa Joe's Delorean to go back into time and into the future. When they gave it back to him with a scratch on it he was angry and hit a muscle buster on Michael J. Fox, which years later was the cause of his Parkinson's disease.
When Samoa Joe was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Samoa Joe!" T hen she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with.
Samoa Joe is not lactose intolerant, he just refuses to put up with lactose's sh*t.
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Post by sirendemented on Dec 20, 2005 11:04:57 GMT -5
In the movie "Back to the Future" they used Samoa Joe's Delorean to go back into time and into the future. When they gave it back to him with a scratch on it he was angry and hit a muscle buster on Michael J. Fox, which years later was the cause of his Parkinson's disease. duuuuuuuuudddddeeeee!!!!!!!!!! that is so wrong! When Samoa Joe was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Samoa Joe!" T hen she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with. And that took away the sting lol
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Post by sirendemented on Dec 20, 2005 11:12:27 GMT -5
The power of Joe and Bruce Campbell being in the same room is enough to implode the world. Hence why they are never seen together
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Post by Ash Whenzday on Dec 20, 2005 12:19:52 GMT -5
Danny Devito was at one point seven feet tall. Samoa Joe at one point hit Danny Devito with the Muscle Buster. You do the math.
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Johnny Danger (Godz)
Wade Wilson
loves him some cavity searches
Lord Xeen's going to kill you.
Posts: 27,736
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Post by Johnny Danger (Godz) on Dec 20, 2005 12:22:48 GMT -5
In the beginning, all men were black. Then one saw Samoa Joe and got scared REAL bad.....thus, the white man was born.
(No offense intended here....I'm simply stating that he got so scared all the color drained from his face and he wet himself. Joe be with you.)
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bigHEADinc
El Dandy
Wanted Conway Twitty as a special title.
lest we forget...
Posts: 7,711
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Post by bigHEADinc on Dec 20, 2005 12:48:44 GMT -5
Samoa Joe broke down the Berlin Wall with a stiff Yakuza Kick...
On the 7th day, God rested... On the 8th, he created Samoa Joe... On the 9th, he tapped to the Kokina Clutch...
Samoa Joe caused the great Stock Market Crash of 1929 during an exhibition bout with a bull, when, while executing his Muscle Buster, he rocked Wall Street, also inventing the terms "Bull Market" and "Bear Market"
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Post by HMARK Center on Dec 20, 2005 12:51:33 GMT -5
In an attempt to end World War II, the United States government authorized the drop of Samoa Joe onto Hiroshima. However, the Japanese hired a mercenary, known today as Low Ki, to meet him. The ensuing fight leveled the city, killing thousands.
However, the match was so well received (Metlzer gave it ****1/2) that a rematch was immediately booked in Nagasaki.
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Johnny Danger (Godz)
Wade Wilson
loves him some cavity searches
Lord Xeen's going to kill you.
Posts: 27,736
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Post by Johnny Danger (Godz) on Dec 20, 2005 12:52:48 GMT -5
Godzilla then challenged Joe after the match. The flying debris left in their wake formed Mt Fuji
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Post by Ash Whenzday on Dec 20, 2005 12:53:54 GMT -5
Samoa Joe was the inspiration for Godzilla, hence the music.
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bigHEADinc
El Dandy
Wanted Conway Twitty as a special title.
lest we forget...
Posts: 7,711
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Post by bigHEADinc on Dec 20, 2005 12:54:26 GMT -5
In an attempt to end World War II, the United States government authorized the drop of Samoa Joe onto Hiroshima. However, the Japanese hired a mercenary, known today as Low Ki, to meet him. The ensuing fight leveled the city, killing thousands. However, the match was so well received (Metlzer gave it ****1/2) that a rematch was immediately booked in Nagasaki. that had me laughing pretty hard... my boss is staring at me funny... Capcom based each and every single person in Street Fighter II on a part of Samoa Joe's personality... He was originally a secret character, but as soon as you picked him, you won... And it wasn't programmed to do that...
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Post by Ash Whenzday on Dec 20, 2005 12:57:16 GMT -5
Samoa Joe one performed brain surgery on himself, and the leftover gray matter has been found to be the cure for "X-Pac Heat".
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Post by invaderdave on Dec 20, 2005 13:09:59 GMT -5
Jimmy Hoffa once called Samoa Joe "Samoa Jack". I think you know where this story ends.
Samoa Joe is actually 2,234 years old. The Grim Reaper stopped trying at year 135 out of fear.
Samoa Joe and Sonny Chiba meet with eachother from time to time. The last meeting between the two was called "Hurricane Katrina".
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bigHEADinc
El Dandy
Wanted Conway Twitty as a special title.
lest we forget...
Posts: 7,711
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Post by bigHEADinc on Dec 20, 2005 13:17:32 GMT -5
Jimmy Hoffa once called Samoa Joe "Samoa Jack". I think you know where this story ends. Samoa Joe is actually 2,234 years old. The Grim Reaper stopped trying at year 135 out of fear. Samoa Joe and Sonny Chiba meet with eachother from time to time. The last meeting between the two was called "Hurricane Katrina". ouch... Atlantis did exist at one point, that is, before the King invited Samoa Joe for dinner, and served him some bad fish... In 1992, a missle was launched by Iraq at New York, but Samoa Joe, standing high atop Lady Liberty, caught the missle with his teeth and launched it into space, successfully destroying several galaxies...
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Post by HMARK Center on Dec 20, 2005 13:30:05 GMT -5
After successfully splitting the continents of Earth from the original "super-continent", Pangea, Samoa Joe and Bryan Danielson decided to spar in celebration. In the course of the fight, Danielson hefted Joe up into the Airplane Spin of DOOM. Upon the 2,000th revolution, the first known tornado in North American history was formed. Joe's ensuing vomit then formed the Rocky Mountains.
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Post by tigermask on Dec 20, 2005 13:40:16 GMT -5
Joe happens to be a great cook.
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Post by V3rtigo on Dec 20, 2005 13:45:48 GMT -5
Joe is the future star of "Joe, OC Ranger"
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Post by Ash Whenzday on Dec 20, 2005 13:47:33 GMT -5
Samoa Joe invented the internet as a way of killing people over long distances.
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Post by tigermask on Dec 20, 2005 13:57:26 GMT -5
Samoa Joe's sweat can book Dennis Stamp, pay Luger to wrestle Ron Killings, kill people who doubt El Dandy, and make wrestling still seem real, dammit!
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Post by HMARK Center on Dec 20, 2005 14:13:07 GMT -5
Samoa Joe's sweat can book Dennis Stamp, pay Luger to wrestle Ron Killings, kill people who doubt El Dandy, and make wrestling still seem real, dammit! Ugh, I was about to make one with "Joe doubts El Dandy".
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