|
|
Post by Psy on Oct 29, 2006 7:03:33 GMT -5
I know you got'm, let's hear them. I'll start us off with this gem:
"Did you hear that Oprah Winfrey's divorcing her long-time husband? According to the prenup he gets 36 million dollars. Upon hearing this, O.J. Simpson said, 'Man! Oprah divorce me, I'da made a killing.'"
|
|
|
|
Post by G✇JI☈A on Oct 29, 2006 7:17:23 GMT -5
Here is an old one:
I heard the Captain was on the radio when the Shuttle Exploded. And on the ceiling and on the windscreen and.....
|
|
|
|
Post by EvilMasterComatose on Oct 29, 2006 7:21:22 GMT -5
WHATS NASA STAND FOR?
NEED ANOTHER SEVEN ASTRONAUTS. OH YEAH I'M HERE ALL NIGHT TRY THE VEIL.
|
|
Jiren
Patti Mayonnaise
Hearts Bayformers
Posts: 35,163
|
Post by Jiren on Oct 29, 2006 7:27:38 GMT -5
Years ago their was a submarine the exploded or a radiation leak i cant fully remember, Anyway the joke was:
What does a submarine and a used condom have in common..................They both contain dead "Semen"
In iraq a hostage guy was decapitated and it was around the same time as Christopher Reeve's passing, the joke was:
*guy* and Reeve had a race to Heaven............Reeve won by a head
|
|
|
|
Post by The Jeebus on Oct 29, 2006 7:30:07 GMT -5
Hmm. Are 9/11 jokes considered too tasteless?
Actually, scratch that.
A girl who narrowly survived a land mine explosion wakes up in hospital. She screams, "I can't feel my legs!" and the doctor replies, "yes we had to amputate your arms."
|
|
|
|
Post by jrdchpmn on Oct 29, 2006 8:45:47 GMT -5
Hmm. Are 9/11 jokes considered too tasteless? Actually, scratch that. A girl who narrowly survived a land mine explosion wakes up in hospital. She screams, "I can't feel my legs!" and the doctor replies, "yes we had to amputate your arms." gold |
|
|
|
Post by angryfan on Oct 29, 2006 8:50:37 GMT -5
Heard some from Jimmy Carr last night from a comedy special he did.
What's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? Being raped.
My dog has no nose. How does he smell? Like badger blood.
|
|
|
|
Post by Mad Johnny Maxx on Oct 29, 2006 9:39:31 GMT -5
All right...guess I'd better get one in before this tread gets locked.
Mother Teresa gets to Heaven and is given her halo. She's walking along heaven and sees Princess Di walking around with a bigger halo. Mother Teresa gets absolutely livid and marches to St. Peter and screams "I'VE DEVOTED MY ENTIRE LIFE TO HELPING THE DISEASED, THE AILING, THE DYING...AND THAT PRICESS DI GETS A BIGGER HALO THAN ME?? WHAT'S THE DEAL?!?!?"
St. Peter says, "that's not her halo, Teresa...that's the steering wheel."
|
|
|
|
Post by Lenny: Smooth like Keith Stone on Oct 29, 2006 9:45:38 GMT -5
Wow, this thread is gonna take a turn for the worse. I did notice that the only thing that seems to be sacred around here are the deaths of beloved wrestlers.
So here's one.
Owen Hart, Eddie Guerrero, and Brian Pillman walk into a bar. Eddie says "Ay homes, where's the tequila?" And Owen says "It's not down here, it's up in the rafters. I'll go get it." So then Brian Pillman said "I'M GONNA PISS ALL OVER THE FLOOR!"
Get it? Nah me neither.
|
|
|
|
Post by Pierre the Renaissance Man on Oct 29, 2006 10:05:07 GMT -5
Whats the difference between Christopher Reeve and Superman?
Chrsitopher Walken
(Yep were all goin 2 hell 4 postin these)
|
|
|
|
Post by Shy Guy on Oct 29, 2006 10:53:49 GMT -5
no bad taste jokes from this girl....
|
|
|
|
Post by amsiraK on Oct 29, 2006 10:54:52 GMT -5
This isn't going to end well...
|
|
Deamon Cohln
Don Corleone
AND THAT'S THE GODDAMN TRUTH!
Posts: 1,962
|
Post by Deamon Cohln on Oct 29, 2006 10:55:50 GMT -5
Michael J. "Bobble-head" Fox ;D
|
|
Johnny Danger (Godz)
Wade Wilson
loves him some cavity searches
Lord Xeen's going to kill you.
Posts: 27,736
|
Post by Johnny Danger (Godz) on Oct 29, 2006 10:55:55 GMT -5
Alright, so, a jew, a mexican, and a black guy all g-
(Assassains from the future have gone back in time and exterminated Godz. Carry on)
|
|
|
|
Post by The son of a plumber. on Oct 29, 2006 10:56:38 GMT -5
This is one of the worst jokes I've ever heard.
How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends on how hard you throw them.
|
|
|
|
Post by veggietale on Oct 29, 2006 11:07:46 GMT -5
heres a bad taste joke:eddie guerrero is dead.[in truth,he is in a sand castle in california,with elvis,eating peanut butter and banana sandwiches and having a good time.he'll be back soon...]
|
|
|
|
Post by joecro2000 on Oct 29, 2006 11:16:04 GMT -5
what were steve irwins last words?
barb crikey!
|
|
|
|
Post by mcclanahan on Oct 29, 2006 11:16:23 GMT -5
how do you make a baby float...take your foot off it's head
how do you fit 1000 babys into a phone booth...a blender
how do you get them out...nachos
what do you call a dead baby nailed to the wall...art
what is blue and yellow and sits at the bottom of the pool...a baby with it's floaties slashed
what is red and yellow and floats at the top of the pool...floaties with a slashed baby
what is black and sits in a corner...a baby with it's finger in a power socket
whats green and sits in a corner...the same baby 2 weeks later
what is more fun than swinging babies around on a clothesline...stopping them with a shovel
what is more fun than throwing a baby off the cliff...catching them with a pitchfork
|
|
|
|
Post by mcclanahan on Oct 29, 2006 11:18:19 GMT -5
What is worse than a dead baby in a trash can?
100 dead babies in a trash can.
What is worse than that?
There's a live one at the bottom.
What is worse than that?
It eats its way out.
What is worse than that?
It goes back for seconds.
|
|
|
|
Post by Shy Guy on Oct 29, 2006 11:24:16 GMT -5
how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles?
nail its other hand to the ground
|
|
