No, seriously. Before my internet privileges are revoked for having this opinion, I have to go public with it.
During its initial 2008 theatrical release, I absolutely refused to have anything to do with this movie, due to it's nauseating over-marketing, the fact I wasn't OVERLY impressed with Batman Begins, and mainly because I just hate people and didn't want to sit in a packed theater. I fully intended on watching it some day, but I knew there was no way it'd be as good as the hype, and I didn't feel like paying $10 on a movie ticket just to find out.
Worse. I paid $20 on the DVD (My g/f asked for it for Christmas) to be bored off my ass for almost 3 hours. I was basically silent for the duration of the movie, but as soon as it was done, all I could say was "Well, that was an ordeal." My girlfriend goes "Yeah....?" and I say "Yep, I think it just knocked 'Godzilla' (1998) off my top 5 worst movies of all time list.".
"BUT GODZ HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!?"
Quiet, you. I'm about to get into that. In no particular order, because just like the runny feces I'd compare it to, everything in the movie tends to run together in my mind right now.
So it starts off with some nonsense about the Scarecrow and a fake Batman or two? I've got to wonder why they even bothered bringing Scarecrow back for all 6 seconds of screen time he got.
Speaking of 6 seconds, thats about all the time it took for me to get sick of Bale's forced and hokey "Batman voice". Hey, if they make a third one, can we just dub over him with Kevin Conroy?
Now, I'm not the world's biggest Bat-fan, I much prefer Marvel's characters and stories, but, wasn't the Joker created by Batman? The two have no kind of link at the start (Though the one part of the movie I will admit that I liked was Joker's line to Batman at the end, something along the lines of "I have a feeling we're destined to do this forever"), and if I had to listen to Joker tell another fake emo story about "How I got my scars", I was going to put my foot up somebody's bat-ass.
Yeah, let's just go ahead and get the Joker out of the way. Hey, Jack? Don't worry. You're still #1. I have a feeling that this Joker has the benefit of Eddie Guerrero Syndrome. Oh, the guy just died? THEN HE'S THE BEST EVERRRRRRRRRRRRR!
Speaking about the Joker leads me to one of my main complaints of the film, and it brings back one of my main criticisms of the Thomas Jane "Punisher" film. We'll start with the Punisher. Your ENTIRE FAMILY is murdered, you're missing and presumed dead, but one day you just happen to show up alive and well in front of a police station...yet...no one even attempts to take you in for questioning. Really? You wouldn't even be a "person of interest" in that case, let alone PRIME SUSPECT?
Now let's go to the Joker. He reveals his intentions to blow up a hospital. Gotham General is the "priority", I believe was the word. So, can anyone explain to me why there was not a single SWAT sniper anywhere around that building to PUT A BULLET IN THE JOKER'S HEAD as he casually strolls away from the building in a heavily armored...uhh....nurse's uniform.
Seriously?
I know law enforcement aren't meant to be the "stars" of these movies, and there's no way that the Joker should've died like that, but, they should've at least tried. How stupid is everyone in this city?
Oh, and great idea to leave one unarmed cop in charge of guarding the un-restrained Joker in the jail, too. Cause thats the way things happen in the real world. Yep.
At least the film brought many new and fresh ideas to the superhero film genre, such as the reluctant hero w-...crap, that was Spider-Man 2. Ah yes, the hero's choice on which lives to sav-....dammit, that was Spider-Man.
Let's move on to Harvey Dent. There was some potential here. Some. Hell, the entire film was basically a glorified backstory for him, existing only to lead up to his creation as Two-Face. Only problem is, once he BECOMES Two-Face...he dies after 10 minutes of screen time. From about a 10 foot fall or so. The build up and the execution there simply do not add up, you wasted the viewers' time, but, they don't care because this movie made more money than God.
So, I understand the thinking of saving Dent's "image" by not tying him to the murders, but, uh, why Batman exactly? Why not just pin them on Joker and his goons? At this point, WOULD ANYONE REALLY BE ASKING ANY QUESTIONS?!
Honestly, I was surprised at how unenjoyable this movie was for me. I was also surprised at how cliched and non-memorable Ledger's performance as the Joker was. It had its moments, but overall, I'd have rather them "Roger Rabbit"-ed Mark Hamil's animated Joker onto the screen instead. I wouldn't have complained.
I know at this point I've wrecked any chances I ever had at some sweet "Daddy didn't love me enough"/"Daddy loved me too much" lovin' with a cashier from Hot Topic, but, I'm willing to accept that sacrifice if it means getting the word out there that someone actually hated this movie. After all, the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.
Or the one.
Ah yes, Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. A good movie with a great villain. And now Ricardo Montalban is dead. Are you happy, Dark Knight? Are you?
Now, as the Human Torch would say....flame on, kids. Flame on. I don't expect any of you to share my opinion on this, but, there it is all the same. If I remember anything else I hated while I'm at work, I'll be sure and add it in later.