vm88
Samurai Cop
Posts: 2,252
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Post by vm88 on Jun 26, 2012 18:20:35 GMT -5
"I'm Heath Slater, and as the One-Man Rock Band, I get all the chicks in the world! I'll tell you what, pimpin' ain't easy!"
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Post by Evilution E5150 on Jun 26, 2012 18:28:10 GMT -5
"You know, they say all men are created equal. But, you look at me, the ONNNEEEE MANNNNN BANNNNDDDDD, and these idiots out in the crowd, and you can see that statement is not true. See normally, if you go one on one with another wrestler, you got a 50-50 chance of winning, but I'm a ONNNNNNNEEEEE MANNNNNN BANNNNDDDDDD and I'm not normal. So you got a 25 percent chance.... AT BEST... of beating me. But a few weeks ago I faced Vader, and lost. And then I faced Sid, and lost. So, I'm overdue. If you take the 75 percent chance I have of winning, and you times it by 3 because I'm overdue, you get 225 percent. But I have a 450 percent chance of winning, because whoever comes out here knows they have no chance of winning, and they won't even try. So, the numbers don't lie, and they spell disaster for whoever tries to face me next!" i would make for that, Followed by sirens and "Gimme the f***ing mic!"
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Post by Confused Mark Wahlberg on Jun 26, 2012 18:28:35 GMT -5
"I'm Heath Slater BAHBEH, and you don't want none of this here because I cheat. You got 21? I GOT 22! Aces and Eights? I got two of those too!"
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"Hollywood" Cactus Matt
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
You couldn't ask for a better custom title!
How do you spell "Goddess"? C-H-R-I-S-T-Y!
Posts: 15,300
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Post by "Hollywood" Cactus Matt on Jun 26, 2012 18:36:34 GMT -5
"List nut punk! That riddle asked potty ignored canned possum be gived rippa ass whippin I'm gonna gimp you EAT A REEF! If you wanna stamp up to PUNCHY BACON OFF cuz eiffel got don't take my medications, Morty AND AMEN THE REEEAAAL BAD MOON!" I would mark so hard my genitals would fall off. "I'm Heath Slater, the One Man Rock Band, and I'm ready this time. I'm ready to take it TO THE MAX! You might even say, I'll hit my opponent so hard he'll land on the MOON!" Or... "For the last few weeks, I've lost to legends like Vader, Roddy Piper, and Sycho Sid. I'm kinda pissed off about it, but tonight ... THE MOOD IS ABOUT TO CHANGE!" cue heartbeats/flatline/drums Cole: "It's my old broadcast partner!" And Tazz proceeds to beat the ever-loving shit out of Heath Slater. And I mark for the Tazzmission.
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Bub (BLM)
Patti Mayonnaise
advocates duck on rodent violence
Fed. Up.
Posts: 37,742
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Post by Bub (BLM) on Jun 26, 2012 18:40:34 GMT -5
"All right, y'all. These so-called 'legends' may have gotten the best of me for a few weeks, but I ain't takin' it anymore! I'm the One Man Band, bay-bay! I'm an originator and an innovator, and tonight, I'm gonna innovate some violence on any old codger who walks down that ramp!"
*cue Tommy Dreamer pushing a grocery cart of weapons*
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Post by tigermaskxxxvii on Jun 26, 2012 18:53:16 GMT -5
"I hope whoever they send out to face me isn't married, because I'll make his poor wife a widow. Because Heath Slater is not just a ONE MAN SOUTHERN ROCK BAND!!! But I am also a Widowmaker! I said I am also a Widowmak......"
*Cue Barry Windam's music*
"Whoever they send out here, I'm gonna show them no mercy! You know what I mean?"
*cue Waylon Mercy's music*
"I'm Heath Slater, the ONE MAN SOUTHERN ROCK BAND!!! I'm sure I can handle whatever plebeian they throw my way!"
*Cue Bob Backlund walking down the ramp with wide crazy eyes and no music*
"Being Heath Slater: the ONE MAN SOUTHERN ROCK BAND!!! Isn't just the coolest, it's not just the best, it's......Pretty Wonderful!!!!"
*Justin Credible starts going down the ramp before hearing the end of the sentence and starts backing up the ramp so Roma and Orndorff can handle business*
Slater makes a comment about being cursed with these past few weeks of embarassment, which results in him wrestling against Papa Shango in a matched ref'd by Scott Armstrong.
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hassanchop
Grimlock
Who are you to doubt Belldandy?
Posts: 14,909
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Post by hassanchop on Jun 26, 2012 19:02:53 GMT -5
"I'm Heath Slater, the one man rock band, look at what's happened to me, I can't believe it myself. Suddenly I'm up on top of the world, it should've been somebody else..."
This hits:
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salz4life
Grimlock
Prichard is a guy who gets that his job is to service his boss.
Posts: 14,314
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Post by salz4life on Jun 26, 2012 19:08:15 GMT -5
"The One Man Southern Rock Band ALWAYS gets his man!" *Mountie's music hits* Book this... please!
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wildojinx
Wade Wilson
Posts: 27,164
Member is Online
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Post by wildojinx on Jun 26, 2012 19:08:44 GMT -5
Im Heath Slater, and im going to win tonight because im BIZZARE!
*Cue DH Smith*
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Post by Big DSR Energy on Jun 26, 2012 19:13:51 GMT -5
"I like trains"
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Post by The Portable Stove on Jun 26, 2012 19:36:54 GMT -5
I'm the one man band, baby! I'm a bad man! I'd even slap my own momma for a dollar! I said, I'd slap my own momma for a dollar!
/cue the Horsemen
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Post by frogsplash45 on Jun 26, 2012 21:09:05 GMT -5
"The One Man Southern Rock Band ALWAYS gets his man!" *Mountie's music hits* Book this... please! This is one of the ones I could actually imagine watching, haha.
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thecrusherwi
El Dandy
the Financially Responsible Man
Brawl For All
Posts: 7,723
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Post by thecrusherwi on Jun 26, 2012 21:13:58 GMT -5
I'd just like to come out here and apologize for my behavior the past few weeks. I may be a ONE MAN ROCK BAND, but I'm also here to have fun with the WWE Universe. If you people wanna see these blasts from the past, who am I do judge? I'm Heath Slater....Good Day...... {Spoiler}
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percymania
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Percymania will live forever! Oh yeah!
Posts: 17,296
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Post by percymania on Jun 27, 2012 0:10:27 GMT -5
"Hey, no one messes with the One Man Southern Rock Band, baby! And let me tell you, I am ONE MAN. Because I'm so manly, I can grow the greatest mustache you've ever seen. In a few weeks time, I'll have the nicest, thickest mustache. None of the BOYS in the back can grow a mustache like mine."
*cue Eli Cottonwood*
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ededdneddy
Hank Scorpio
ededdandembed
Posts: 5,697
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Post by ededdneddy on Jun 27, 2012 0:22:33 GMT -5
"I don't care what has happened to me these past weeks. I will get my revenge on these so called legends, because there's a saying that goes; "Everyday, Somebody's Gotta Pay" and that's exactly what my opponent tonight is going to be doing. He will be paying me respect. I am Heath Slater, and I am the One Man Rock Ban...."
*cue Mean Street Posse music*
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hassanchop
Grimlock
Who are you to doubt Belldandy?
Posts: 14,909
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Post by hassanchop on Jun 27, 2012 0:49:46 GMT -5
"I'm Heath Slater and I'm a one man rock band, now hear me sing and here me rap, gimme a beat!"
Tomko: No.
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Post by chickenplucka on Jun 27, 2012 1:22:22 GMT -5
Every week I've been humbled in the ring, I've had my ass beat by all these legends, I've been humbled every week. Well now it's time for me to humble a legend.
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Jeremy
Hank Scorpio
Horse of a Different Color
Posts: 6,240
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Post by Jeremy on Jun 27, 2012 1:30:11 GMT -5
I'm Heath Slater. Toot toot baybeh.
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The Sam
El Dandy
The Brainiest Sam of all
Posts: 8,423
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Post by The Sam on Jun 27, 2012 2:13:51 GMT -5
Heath Slater: "I'm Heath Slater, the one man southern rock band! I'm also a rabid wolverine, and if you don't think so, then prove me wrong. PROVE! ME! WRONG! Michael Cole: Jerry Lawler: The fans: Vince McMahon: BREAKING NEWS FROM WWE.COM: Heath Slater (Heath Slater) has been released. We wish him well in all his future endeavors.
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Dang!
Dennis Stamp
Posts: 4,321
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Post by Dang! on Jun 27, 2012 6:50:46 GMT -5
"I'm Heath Slater, the one man rock band, look at what's happened to me, I can't believe it myself. Suddenly I'm up on top of the world, it should've been somebody else..." This hits: Is the Cinema Snob even famous enough? "I'm Heath Slater, I'm a one man southern rock band and IT'S SHOWTIME!"
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