WWE/Simpsons thread infinity + 1

[wildojinx]

With THOH XXI tonight, its as good a time as ever:

Vince and Shane are watching SD:
Shane: Dad, what's Jack Swagger's gimmick?
Vince: Well, he's not angle and he's not nowinski, but man (laughs) so to answer your question i dont know.

[lionheart21]

Matt Hardy/Carlito: You don’t like your job, you don’t strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That’s the American way.

Sheamus: Aaah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me!

[Methusael86]

I was just thinking of starting one of these
Here's a few:

-------------
All the NXT rookies are having a meeting.

Barrett: Gentlemen, I've been meeting with Vince McMahon back and forth, and I'm getting fed up.
Otunga: We should invade RAW! All in favor?
Everyone: AYE!
Otunga: All opposed?
"Nay."
Barrett: Who keeps saying that?

Everyone turns to the back of the room to see Daniel Bryan and Michael Cole.

Cole: Um...it was him! [points to Daniel Bryan] Let's get him!

All the rookies beat up Daniel Bryan as Michael Cole laughs.

-------------
Cena wakes up in the locker room after partying for his new movie Legendary.

Cena: Ow, my head.
Orton: Tsk, tsk, tsk, the remorse of a main eventer.
Cena: I don't remember anything.
Orton: Really? Not even that?

Orton points to what Cena is wearing. Cena looks at himself and realizes he's wearing Nexus gear.

Cena: AH! I joined the Nexus!
Orton: The few, the proud, the screwed.
Cena: Boy, a man on a movie bender can sure do some crazy things.

-------------
HHH overhears Striker, Lawler, and Cole talking backstage.

Lawler: According to Meltzer, Michelle McCool isn't as beautiful as she seems. Word is she uses appearance-altering cosmetics.
Striker: Oh my God, that's shocking.
Cole: She should be stripped of the title. I wish was the RAW GM was here.
HHH: Oh, I don't know, Cole, he might be closer than you think.
Cole: Are you him? Are you the RAW GM?
HHH: No.
Cole: But you talked in that real sly voice. Hey everybody, HHH is the RAW GM!
HHH: I'm not the RAW GM! ...or am I?
Lawler: Are you?
HHH: No!

[67 more]

Cena: Hey, I have this friend and he has this problem...
Truth: What's your friend's name?
Cena: Uh.... Mike... McGillcutty.
Truth: That's the worst name I ever heard.

*McGillicutty runs out of bar*

Harris: McGillicutty!

[Johnny Nitro]

The classic one:



Nitro: The bee bit my bottom! Now my bottom's big!

ETA:

Dixie Carter: And what are your reasons for wanting to join TNA?
Matt's brain: Don't say revenge! Don't say revenge!
Matt Hardy: Uh, revenge?
Matt's brain: That's it, I'm gettin' outta here. [footsteps, and a door slam]

[anonymousdonor]

Drew McIntyre, about to be chokeslammed by Kane, tries to remember the advice that Mr. McMahon gave him:

McMahon: Now, if you ever find yourself in a tough spot with Kane, just remember to...
Cody Rhodes: It feels like I'm wearing no kneepads at all! no kneepads at all! no kneepads at all!
Drew McIntyre: Stupid sexy Cody!

[Beets by Schrute]

Morrison: It feels like I'm wearing nothing at all.....nothing at all.......NOTHING AT ALL!!
Sheamus: Gah! Stupid,sexy JoMo!

Barrett: And I say our greatest prime minister was Lord Palmerston.
Regal: Pitt the Elder.
Barrett: LORD PALMERSTON!
Regal: Pitt. The Elder! SUNSHINE!!
Barrett: Okay, you asked for it!
*punches Regal*
Darren Young: Yea, that's showin him Wade. Pitt the Elder.
Barrett: LORD PALMERSTON!
*punches Young*
Barrett: and you're out of Nexus

[Perpetual Nirvana]

*The Nexus invades Smackdown*

Barrett: So, another Friday is upon us. What will you be doing, Gabriel? Something gay, no doubt!
Gabriel: What?!
Barrett: You know. Light-hearted, fancy-free. Mothers, lock up your daughters! Gabriel is on the town!
Gabriel: (laughs nervously) Exactly, sir!

[Captain Charisma]

Cole: Okay, don't panic! To find Daniel Bryan, you just have to think like Daniel Bryan...
Cole's brain: I'm a big vee-jan lame-o. I wear the same stupid red trunks everyday and-
Coler: Aberdeen, Washington!

[showster22]

Wade barret:Hi diddily ho nex-a-reno

cena:stupid barret

[showster22]

Cody Rhodes: so drew you exicited about friday night smackdown

drew Mcintyre:Cody when you grow up you'll realilise that Friday night smackdown is just another night between nbc's must see tv thursday and cbs' Saturday night crap-a-ramma

[Legion]

Nov 7, 2010 20:27:25 GMT -5 Johnny Nitro said:

Dixie Carter: And what are your reasons for wanting to join TNA?
Matt's brain: Don't say revenge! Don't say revenge!
Matt Hardy: Uh, revenge?
Matt's brain: That's it, I'm gettin' outta here. [footsteps, and a door slam]

That would do get him a TNA title run

Nov 8, 2010 3:38:11 GMT -5 Perpetual Nirvana said:

*The Nexus invades Smackdown*

Barrett: So, another Friday is upon us. What will you be doing, Gabriel? Something gay, no doubt!
Gabriel: What?!
Barrett: You know. Light-hearted, fancy-free. Mothers, lock up your daughters! Gabriel is on the town!
Gabriel: (laughs nervously) Exactly, sir!

This one made me laugh so damn much. I even minds eye pictured it. Very well done.

[Deleted]

Joey Styles: "Sandman, you just killed The Zombie!"

Sandman: "He was a zombie?"

[toonami4life]

(At a Film Festival)

Scott Hall: Next their going to show my movie
CM Punk: You made a movie?
Hall: I made a movie? No wonder I was on the cover of Pro Wrestling Insider (Holds up magazine)

Later Film Judge Big Show is rewatching the films to decide who is the winner

Big Show: Hall's movie had heart, but Santino breaking Warlord's Royal Rumble record had Santino breaking Warlord's Royal Rumble record.
(Hall on film) Don't cry for me, I'm already dead...
Big Show: Wow, I'll never drink another Beer.
Vendor: Beer Here!
Big Show: I'll take ten

Later after Hall wins the film festival award.

Hall: I've realized I have a gift and a talent. From now on it's a clean slate. I'm working sober.
J.R.: Congraulations Scott Hall, and enjoy your award. A life time supply of Beer.
(Hall rolls up sleeve of his shirt.)
Hall: Just hook it to my vein!

[showster22]

Vince planning the invasion angle: i am so smart. I am so smart. S-M-R-T. I mean S-M-A-R-T

[casualobserver]

(David Otunga is training in his front lawn for his match against Edge)

Otunga: Its gonna take a miracle for me to become a good wrestler!

Shawn Michaels: Excuse me, son.

Otunga: Wow! Shawn Michaels!

Shawn: Thats right. My car broke down in front of your house.

Otunga: I cannot believe you are here! Do you think maybe you could give me some pointers?

Shawn: Sure! There's only one thing you need to know to be a great wrestler.

Mrs. Michaels: (from the car) Shawn, honey, I fixed it! It was just vapor lock!

Shawn: OK, look, I've gotta run. Remember what I told you! (leaves)

(David focuses)

Otunga: Ok, David, concentrate...

(David tries to remember what Shawn told him, then comes to a realization)

Otunga: (dejected) I'm dead.

[Woooooolhouse!]

Razor Ramon: In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

[big nasty]

inside cenas head:

barrett lost..

cena has no job..

barret lost..

cena has no job..

barret lost..

cena has no job..

cena out loud:...if barret loses the match.....ILL LOSE MY JOB IN WWE!

[Trent Valentine]

Drew McIntyre: [Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel are tied up in a dark room with only a small dim light on, McIntyre eyes the tag belts then the two Nexus Members.] Oh, you're gonna break like matchsticks, I promise you that.

Cody Rhodes: [coming through the door, turns on the big light] Hey, I made some Rice Krispies Squares for our hungry Tag Team Champions!

Drew McIntyre: Oh, man! You ruined the atmosphere, you daft pansy!

Cody Rhodes: Well, this is my rumpus room.

Drew McIntyre: Don't call it that!

[Perpetual Nirvana]

Wade Barrett: (pointing a Skip Sheffield) I call the big one Bitey!