biafra
El Dandy
Biafra Who?
Posts: 7,617
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Post by biafra on Jan 4, 2009 15:39:34 GMT -5
I understand why someone would wear it. I mean..I remember back in school virgin was a dirty word, something to make fun of and something people lied about NOT being to fit in. Seeing that reality I respect and understand anyone who would put out the fact they are choosing to go against popular culture with a moral decision. I really don't get why it's more "moral" to remain virgin until you're married rather than not. I mean, people do what they want but as other people have pointed out, wearing a purity ring is rubbing it in people's face and saying "I'm not acting like YOU, and MY opinion is better than YOURS. Hence, I am better than you." If they don't feel like having sex until marriage, then may them not have sex until marriage, but don't come telling me that one decision is better or more moral than the other. By "moral decision" I mean decision an individual makes based about personal morals, not insinuating the this decisions is moral as opposed to another being immoral.
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biafra
El Dandy
Biafra Who?
Posts: 7,617
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Post by biafra on Jan 4, 2009 15:42:11 GMT -5
I guess I have so much of a "live and let live' philosophy that as long as the person isn't hurting someone else with it or using it belittle someone else I don't really even think about it.
I guess if I thought about it in a deeper sense I could see pros and cons but in at the end of the day it's just a f***ing bracelet on a wrist that's not mine so I don't care.
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The Line
Patti Mayonnaise
Real Name: Bumkiss. Stanley Bumkiss.
Peanut Butter & JAAAAAMMMM!
Posts: 36,698
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Post by The Line on Jan 4, 2009 15:44:55 GMT -5
I guess I have so much of a "live and let live' philosophy that as long as the person isn't hurting someone else with it or using it belittle someone else I don't really even think about it. I guess if I thought about it in a deeper sense I could see pros and cons but in at the end of the day it's just a snorking bracelet on a wrist that's not mine so I don't care. yeah, pretty much. Normally, I wouldn't give a flying f*** about this issue, but I just know more than a few people who have been pretty vocal dickheads about the rings(meaning they believe in them, and anyone who doesn't is deemed a bad person for it), so kinda sours me on them.
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biafra
El Dandy
Biafra Who?
Posts: 7,617
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Post by biafra on Jan 4, 2009 15:49:21 GMT -5
I guess I have so much of a "live and let live' philosophy that as long as the person isn't hurting someone else with it or using it belittle someone else I don't really even think about it. I guess if I thought about it in a deeper sense I could see pros and cons but in at the end of the day it's just a snorking bracelet on a wrist that's not mine so I don't care. yeah, pretty much. Normally, I wouldn't give a flying snork about this issue, but I just know more than a few people who have been pretty vocal dickheads about the rings(meaning they believe in them, and anyone who doesn't is deemed a bad person for it), so kinda sours me on them. Well, it's like me living a straight edge lifestyle yet finding more irritation at the "hardline" kids than those who drink. If the symbol is simply "this is the way I live" then cool. If other people read into it "you think you are better than me" simply by looking at it then they probably have some self esteem issues or are way too touchy about things they shouldn't care about. If you use it to browbeat other people then you are an ass. It;s like the slogan I had in my avatar for a while.."straightedge..it only makes sense if you're not a dick about it." I guess the same thing applies here.
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Post by katelin on Jan 4, 2009 15:59:05 GMT -5
I have no problem with actual idea of wanting to wait until marriage if that's what you want(in fact, I myself wanted to wait until I got married when I was younger, although I have since changed my mind seeing as to how I never want to get married).
But I think wearing a ring for it is unnecessary. I guess I just don't understand why you would want everyone you come in contact with knowing about your sex life(or lack thereof). I've heard some people say that they use the rings as a "reminder" and I don't get that either. It's like, do you have people throwing themselves at you every single day and you use the ring as a sort of "What Would Jesus Do?" reminder?
And the name "purity" rings bug me too. Sex doesn't make you "dirty" or anymore un-pure than anyone else.
I guess I just don't get why chastity is such a virtue these days.
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EAT IT
Bubba Ho-Tep
Way Up In There
Posts: 627
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Post by EAT IT on Jan 4, 2009 16:33:56 GMT -5
I think it's goofy. Sex and virginity being some kind of special gift is snorkin' goofy. Nail+head=this
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Post by tap on Jan 4, 2009 16:56:30 GMT -5
If you wear one, fine, but why not... y'know, get an engagement ring then?
A promise ring more or less says "I love you enough to have sex with you when we're married... I just don't want to get married right now."
THAT makes no sense to me.
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Post by KStrick on Jan 4, 2009 17:02:45 GMT -5
While I greatly appreciate the message it's conveying (I do believe in abstaining from sex before marriage for health, religious, and a slew of other reasons). However, like most "signs", it's a great idea that people will ultimatly either grow to hate, or ignore the meaning, making it a fashion symbol. Similar to those LiveStrong bands that EVERYONE wore (ultimately leading to everyone and their brother making "support" rubber bands for anything from team pride to stripper support... I wish I were joking...), it will probably become a fashion symbol, or people will misleadingly wear them, or a whole slew of other issues. Whenever I meet women, and the topic DOES lead to that point, I let them know that I myself abstain. Pretty much does the trick to get most of them to leave me alone, but some do thoe whole degrading/condescending tone that I've seen quite prevelent in this thread. Do I believe everyone should abstain? No. It's your right to do with your body what you want, so long as you don't hurt other people or corrupt the innocence of children (my ultimate "make-me-pissed-off-the-most-er"). But if you are the kind of person who believes in promiscuity, or social monogamy, God Bless you, it's just not the ideal I wish for for myself or my (hopeful) spouse-to-be. I'm not abstinent, but other than that, I completely agree with this statement. And that's why I love ya, Dude, in a totally non-gay way.
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Phosphor Glow
Bill S. Preston, Esq.
Is a real girl!
Posts: 19,871
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Post by Phosphor Glow on Jan 4, 2009 17:05:10 GMT -5
I'm not abstinent, but other than that, I completely agree with this statement. And that's why I love ya, Dude, in a totally non-gay way. Word, son.
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Post by B'Cup x on Jan 4, 2009 17:11:50 GMT -5
If you wear one, fine, but why not... y'know, get an engagement ring then? A promise ring more or less says "I love you enough to have sex with you when we're married... I just don't want to get married right now." THAT makes no sense to me. purity rings are differnt to promise rings, they do not tie you down to any one person, you can be single and still wear a purity ring
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Post by tap on Jan 4, 2009 17:16:03 GMT -5
If you wear one, fine, but why not... y'know, get an engagement ring then? A promise ring more or less says "I love you enough to have sex with you when we're married... I just don't want to get married right now." THAT makes no sense to me. purity rings are differnt to promise rings, they do not tie you down to any one person, you can be single and still wear a purity ring I feel bad for someone who's engaged if they also have a purity AND promise ring. That's 3 rings, potentially on one finger!
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Post by Supersmark is a Troll on Jan 4, 2009 17:16:15 GMT -5
I don't have a problem with a young person who chooses to wear a purity ring. What I do have a problem with is parents and schools who choose to preach abstinence without advising the kids about birth control and especially STDs. To assume that most adolescents are going to abstain at a time in their lives that horniness is at its highest is to assume failure. Bingo.
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Post by SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman on Jan 4, 2009 17:23:05 GMT -5
While I greatly appreciate the message it's conveying (I do believe in abstaining from sex before marriage for health, religious, and a slew of other reasons). However, like most "signs", it's a great idea that people will ultimatly either grow to hate, or ignore the meaning, making it a fashion symbol. Similar to those LiveStrong bands that EVERYONE wore (ultimately leading to everyone and their brother making "support" rubber bands for anything from team pride to stripper support... I wish I were joking...), it will probably become a fashion symbol, or people will misleadingly wear them, or a whole slew of other issues. Whenever I meet women, and the topic DOES lead to that point, I let them know that I myself abstain. Pretty much does the trick to get most of them to leave me alone, but some do thoe whole degrading/condescending tone that I've seen quite prevelent in this thread. Do I believe everyone should abstain? No. It's your right to do with your body what you want, so long as you don't hurt other people or corrupt the innocence of children (my ultimate "make-me-pissed-off-the-most-er"). But if you are the kind of person who believes in promiscuity, or social monogamy, God Bless you, it's just not the ideal I wish for for myself or my (hopeful) spouse-to-be. That I actually agree with. If people want to wait until they meet THE person they believe is the best for them, then more power to them. What I hate about purity rings is that, as other people said, it's pointlessly rubbing it in people's face, in the same that a certain pro wrestler believes he's "better than [us]" for being "drug free and alcohol free." Good for you if you can live without that, but you're not better than someone just because you have a different lifestyle. If people want to wait until marriage, then let them do so. If people want to have sex with people they just like without believing they'll live with them forever, let them do so and heck, if people want to have sex with anyone they find attractive let them do so. As you said, people should be able to do what they want with their bodies as long as it all happens between consenting adults.
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Jay Peas 42
El Dandy
Totally flips out ALL the time.
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Post by Jay Peas 42 on Jan 4, 2009 17:47:35 GMT -5
As a symbol of one's obligations towards God that is, to avoid temptation, I see no problem with it. When it becomes the evangelical version of an obnoxious vegan (but I repeat myself), then I could see how it would become annoying. Also, to belive that you are free from lust by your own will or desire is pride, which is also a sin, one almost as potent among the youth as lust.
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Post by Next Level was WRONG on Jan 4, 2009 17:54:46 GMT -5
I think they're sexy.
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Chainsaw
T
A very BAD man.
It is what it is
Posts: 90,480
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Post by Chainsaw on Jan 4, 2009 18:02:16 GMT -5
I think it's utter garbage. Anything else I say on this subject will get the thread closed. That said, here's a picture of character actor James Best as Sherrif Roscoe P. Coltrane.
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Post by SsnakeBite, the No1 Frenchman on Jan 4, 2009 18:03:49 GMT -5
I think it's utter garbage. Anything else I say on this subject will get the thread closed. That said, here's a picture of character actor James Best as Sherrif Roscoe P. Coltrane. This dog must be on something that'll make it fail the next wellness test.
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Post by Bob Schlapowitz on Jan 4, 2009 18:15:34 GMT -5
I have no problem with actual idea of wanting to wait until marriage if that's what you want(in fact, I myself wanted to wait until I got married when I was younger, although I have since changed my mind seeing as to how I never want to get married). But I think wearing a ring for it is unnecessary. I guess I just don't understand why you would want everyone you come in contact with knowing about your sex life(or lack thereof). I've heard some people say that they use the rings as a "reminder" and I don't get that either. It's like, do you have people throwing themselves at you every single day and you use the ring as a sort of "What Would Jesus Do?" reminder? And the name "purity" rings bug me too. Sex doesn't make you "dirty" or anymore un-pure than anyone else. I guess I just don't get why chastity is such a virtue these days. Amen, sister! The implication of "purity" is what bugs me. Am I somehow "impure" or "dirty" because I didn't wait until I was married. For that matter, is it "premarital relations" if you have no plans on ever getting married?
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Post by thesunbeast on Jan 4, 2009 18:19:52 GMT -5
Why does she gotta wear a ring to prove she ain't a ho? Why does she have to show it off like that? I'm not disrespecting the idea of waiting until marriage. It's your body, you do what you want with it. But something just bugs me about people showing off the fact that they wait, as if it's a slap in the face to those who lose their virginity consensually before marriage. My opinion on the matter. I believe that it's the people who have the opinion that wearing the rings is a bad idea that are the ones who have the problem. The social tradition of wearing a ring to signify something like abstinance is no different than the social tradition of someone wearing a ring to signify that they are engaged, or the tradition of wearing a wedding ring to signify they are married, or the tradition of wearing a bracelet to signify they support a cause, or the tradition of wearing a DARE shirt to signify they are against drugs. Or the tradition of of a yellow ribbon to signify support of the troops, or the tradition of wearing the cross to signify one's Christianity. When someone wears an engagement ring, does anyone get uncomfortable by thinking that the engagement ring wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't engaged? No. You can even not want to ever be engaged or married in general and not be annoyed with engagement rings. However, 99% of the time it would take being anti-engagement or anti-marriage in order to be annoyed with the symbolism of the engagement rings. When someone wears a wedding ring, does anyone get uncomfortable by thinking that the wedding ring wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't married? No. You can never want to get married yourself and not be annoyed with the symbolism of wedding rings. However, 99% of the time it would take being anti-marriage in order to be annoyed with the symbolism of the wedding rings. When someone wears a bracelet to signify that they payed money to charity, does anyone get uncomfortable by thinking that the bracelet wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who don't wear similar bracelets? No. 90% of the time it would take being against the ides of donating money, for whatever reason, in order to be annoyed with the symbolism of the the bracelet. When someone wears a DARE shirt, does anyone get uncomortable by thinking that the DARE shirt wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't open about not using drugs? No. You can even be a chronic drug user and still not be annoyed at the idea of DARE. However, 95% of the time it would take being against the idea of drug free in order to be annoyed with the symbolism of the DARE. When someone shows a yellow ribbon, does anyone get uncomortable by thinking that the yellow ribbon showers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who don't show yellow ribbons? No. You can even be against war in general and not be annoyed with yellow ribbons. However, 90% of the time it would take being anti-military in order to be annoyed with the symbolism of the yellow ribbons. When someone wears the cross, does anyone get uncomfortable by thinking that the cross wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't christians? No. You can even be an atheist and not have a problem with christianity, however, 90% of the time it would take being anti-christian to be annoyed with anyone who wears the cross. I bet that most people don't even think about these examples. Why? Because no one has a problem with what they represent, well, except for mabe the DARE example. Do people who wear purity rings do it to say that they are better than those who don't wait for sex after marriage? No. You can almost say that it's the other way around, that it's the people who have slept with others (but not too many) who give off the aura that they are better than virgins or those who make the decision to wait for marraige some time after loosing their virginity, or just for that special person. They'll almost always have to answer the question of why if someone were to find out. Proof of my point is the usage of the word "realistic". I don't mean to piss people off, but that word is only used by people who don't try as hard for something as others do, it's not because anyone is "better", you would not have to try at all while someone else would have to try really hard if you really were "better", so "better" isn't true at all, just harder working. You can be around someone who has different views than you, but if it annoys you, then it's that person that has the problem. Person A could have slept with 50 people and be around person B who is a virgin and wears a purity ring, and person A could not be annoyed at all about the ring's symbolism. However, If person A is at all annoyed, just a little bit, than It's person A that has the problem, not person B. Because It's never about the symbolism, it's always about the issue behind it. It's never "just a shirt".
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The Line
Patti Mayonnaise
Real Name: Bumkiss. Stanley Bumkiss.
Peanut Butter & JAAAAAMMMM!
Posts: 36,698
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Post by The Line on Jan 4, 2009 18:29:36 GMT -5
My opinion on the matter. I believe that it's the people who have the opinion that wearing the rings is a bad idea that are the ones who have the problem. The social tradition of wearing a ring to signify something like abstinance is no different than the social tradition of someone wearing a ring to signify that they are engaged, or the tradition of wearing a wedding ring to signify they are married, or the tradition of wearing a bracelet to signify they support a cause, or the tradition of wearing a DARE shirt to signify they are against drugs. Or the tradition of of a yellow ribbon to signify support of the troops, or the tradition of wearing the cross to signify one's Christianity. When someone wears an engagement ring, does anyone get uncomortable by thinking that the engagement ring wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't engaged? When someone wears a wedding ring, does anyone get uncomortable by thinking that the wedding ring wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't married? When someone wears a bracelet to signify that they payed money to charity, does anyone get uncomfortable by thinking that the bracelet wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who don't wear similar bracelets? When someone wears a DARE shirt, does anyone get uncomortable by thinking that the DARE shirt wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't open about not using drugs? No. You can even be a chronic drug user and still not be annoyed at the idea of DARE. However, 95% of the time it would take being against the idea of drug free in order to be annoyed with the symbolism of the DARE. When someone shows a yellow ribbon, does anyone get uncomortable by thinking that the yellow ribbon showers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who don't show yellow ribbons? No. You can even be against war in general and not be annoyed with yellow ribbons. However, 90% of the time it would take being anti-military in order to be annoyed with the symbolism of the yellow ribbons. When someone wears the cross, does anyone get uncomfortable by thinking that the cross wearers are doing it to act like they're "better" than those who aren't christians? No. You can even be an atheist and not have a problem with christianity, however, 90% of the time it would take being anti-christian to be annoyed with anyone who wears the cross. I bet that most people don't even think about these examples. Why? Because no one has a problem with what they represent, well, except for mabe the DARE example. Do people who wear purity rings do it to say that they are better than those who don't wait for sex after marriage? No. You can almost say that it's the other way around, that it's the people who have slept with others (but not too many) who give off the aura that they are better than virgins or those who make the decision to wait for marraige some time after loosing their virginity, or just for that special person. They'll almost always have to answer the question of why if someone were to find out. Proof of my point is the usage of the word "realistic". I don't mean to piss people off, but that word is only used by people who don't try as hard for something as others do, it's not because anyone is "better", you would not have to try at all while someone else would have to try really hard if you really were "better", so "better" isn't true at all, just harder working. You can be around someone who has different views than you, but if it annoys you, then it's that person that has the problem. Person A could have slept with 50 people and be around person B who is a virgin and wears a purity ring, and person A could not be annoyed at all about the ring's symbolism. However, If person A is at all annoyed, just a little bit, than It's person A that has the problem, not person B. Because It's never about the symbolism, it's always about the issue behind it. It's never "just a shirt". I've already said multiple times that I have no problems with the rings themselves, or even the message behind them. Its when those wearing them(or even those who are against them) use it as an excuse to belittle their peers. There was/is a group from my hometown who would use issues like this and others that we didn't see eye to eye on as an excuse to pretend like they're on a social plane above me, an unwashed heathen.
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