shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 11:08:50 GMT -5
Cena: OCD guy Orton: Perenial underachiever Punk: Skinny Fatass Bryan: B+ Player
HHH: THE KING OF KINGS, THE GAME, THE ASS-KICKER, THE MAN WHO TOOK TAKER TO THE LIMIT AND MADE BROCK LESNAR TAP OUT AND FOUGHT BACK AFTER A CONCUSSION FROM CURTIS AXEL AND ALSO IS A COOL HEEL IN A SUIT
Wait did I do this right???
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 11:05:26 GMT -5
This is a super depressing thread for a few reasons, least of all because it's about MIZ.
A) Relationships aren't things to be won like a videogame or whatever. Typically you find somebody you think you'd compatible with and start from there. You don't have to like.... overcome multiple goals and fight dragons or something.
B) Looks don't matter in a real relationship. They may be the key to getting that first date, but after a few weeks, it doesn't matter much at all.
C) As much as I hate Miz and think he's a literal plague on wrestling that has fundamentally damaged the business, everybody deserves to be happy in a relationship.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 10:44:51 GMT -5
Every so often it needs to happen.
If Orton got his third strike tomorrow and was out of the WWE forever, I'd be totally fine with them absolutely destroying his character on TV for the purpose of building up someone else.
If Kofi accidentally stepped on Vince's shoes backstage, he shouldn't be given a new gimmick of "Evil Magician" or something like that.
But I do think the customary "beatdown injury" to write a guy off after a wellness policy strike is brilliant.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 10:40:54 GMT -5
I'll second electrical engineering - seems like it would assist you in your field AND let you branch out to a LOT of other high paying jobs if need be.
College is a mixed bag, you need to pick a good major and put a lot of work into it nowadays. Red listed most of the good majors, but keep in mind a lot of people end up with jobs that have very little to do with their original major. It's the skills they pick up that help.
A former co-worker of mine had a degree in history. Took a few classes on supply chain. Ended up in entry level customer service work after college because of those classes and eventually became a high-level manager.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 10:34:07 GMT -5
Time for Undertaker vs Cena. And we know Cena's gonna do something big, something to show he's not scared of Taker....
Cena enters, and sees a fan accidentally spill their drink on the ramp. Cena FLIPS, and runs backstage. He comes back out with a bottle of Mr Clean and a washrag. Starts cleaning up the ramp while muttering "It's okay John the stain will come out it WILL COME OUT!".
Someone spills their popcorn on the other side, Cena bolts down there, scoops it up into a dustbin, and runs backstage to properly dispose of it.
As he's coming out again for the third time, somebody else throws a shirt at Cena. Cena's officially cracked at this point, and yells out "DIRTY SHIRTS GO IN THE DIRTY HAMPER I CAN'T --- IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE YOU ALL NEED TO -- NO FOOD IN THE FRIDGE NO CANDLES NO FRAMES----"
At this point it's 10:45 and the camera awkwardly cuts to black with 3 matches left to go. No mention is made of this on Raw the following night and Cena is quietly rushed to an insane asylum.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 10:24:11 GMT -5
It's impossible to screw up a Rumble unless you:
A) Have Vince Russo book it B) Have Alberto Del Rio win it
So I think we're good.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 10:03:21 GMT -5
The Rumble.
Here's the story I have in my head, who knows how much (if any) would actually work out, though.
Kane was kidnapped by the Wyatts at the behest of HHH, who wanted to make sure Daniel Bryan NEVER got to be WWE Champion. He knew Hell No could reunite and fight off the Shield.
After being kidnapped, HHH offers Kane a lucrative job in the Authority, with the caveat that he must do everything he can to prevent Daniel Bryan from winning the WWE Title. They agree, and the fist step is to sic the Wyatts on Bryan and keep him busy, rather than pursuing Orton, who couldn't beat Bryan except with a screwjob finish.
Now the way I see it - Kane's really on Bryan's side. Bryan's only chance to get a title shot is going to be the Rumble, and Kane's going to help him. I'm imagining Bryan enters as #1, with the Shield all coming next to try and eliminate him. Kane enters, HHH is convinced Kane will take out Bryan, and then....
BAH GAWD TEAM HELL NO REUNION!!!! TEAM HELL NO IS CLEANING HOUSE!!!!!
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 9:35:09 GMT -5
Any live event. I'll go to a Raw, absolutely love it, then see online that people hated it.
Something about being there live and starting chants and stuff, it makes you into a little kid again.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 9:00:01 GMT -5
I'm sure this means the AJ story was true and definitely not something that got blown up way beyond what it really was.
Alternately: Natalya has Thermonuclear Fission Heat due to drunk dialing Stephanie on Total Divas (this is also why Tyson hasn't been seen in weeks).
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 8:57:31 GMT -5
When one of Nikki Bella's gross implants explodes (so probably about a month from now tops).
I would like to see Kaitlyn get another shot at the title. That was a really good feud.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 8:54:23 GMT -5
Oh and Miz (to befit his current position in the WWE and his skills) comes out wearing all brown ring gear. His music is replaced with a bunch of farts, and instead of the big inflatable "AWESOME" from a few years back, there's a giant toilet he hops in, then comes out a slip n slide.
The whole time, the announcers are saying stuff like "Looks like the Miz is gonna get flushed tonight!" and "I think he might have a kernel of corn stuck somewhere!" and "Miz is a bad wrestler."
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 8:51:51 GMT -5
If Daniel Bryan's gonna win the WWE World Heavyweight Championship, he needs a cool as hell entrance.
Flight of the Valkyries starts playing. Bryan walks out, wearing this badass white and maroon robe. Like halfway between an old school Flair robe and something Taker would wear. The whole crowd is chanting YES YES YES!!!
The lights go out for a second, then a video plays of the Titantron, showing his evolution from the indy scene up until the WWE today. Just like 30 seconds or something, nothing crazy. The lights come back on and Bryan's ditched the robe, runs down to the ring chanting YES YES YES as the whole crowd goes insane.
Taker needs to top last year's - so I'd say have him smash statues of his former opponents with a hammer as he walks down the ramp.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 8:41:03 GMT -5
This is basically Fandango. Especially if you include his Total Divas appearances.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 7:55:42 GMT -5
Chris Jericho - battled Punk for WWE title at Wrestlemania 28.
Chris Jericho - lost to Fandango at Wrestlemania 29.
If Ziggler follows this pattern, then he'll be a constantly dependable guy who can be slotted into the main event with no problem, while still being used to help put over younger talent. Also, he'll have a successful band and write several books.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 16, 2013 7:51:54 GMT -5
I would have rather seen Cena/Bryan at Mania, but Bryan getting his first fair shot at Orton and winning the title would be pretty sweet.
I would be willing to bet money on Bryan winning the Rumble right now. Punk is a close 2nd, and I assume Cena will have some kind of rematch with Orton at the PPV anyway.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 15, 2013 5:51:27 GMT -5
Two out of three falls match that only goes 2 falls.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 13, 2013 14:25:34 GMT -5
How in God's name do the children of Cruella De Vil and Jafar exist in the same time period? And when in the world did these 2 find time to have kids?
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 13, 2013 14:11:54 GMT -5
The match has gone on for about 20 minutes, both guys are almost out of it, it looks like one more big move will end it. Suddenly the arena goes black. The crowd's going crazy - is this a Jericho return? THe titantron lights up, but not with Jericho's entrance. No, someone who REALLY deserves to be the champion of champions:
THE GREAT KHALI
HHH gets on the mic as Khali moves down to the ring (it takes about 17 minutes).
"All you internet marks and you stupid fans should have seen the writing on the walls. You heard I wanted a focus on big guys, and there's nobody bigger than Khali! This is what's #bestforbusiness (he says hashtag) right now, a giant immobile Unified Champion! Oh and Orton and Cena, in case you get any funny ideas about stopping this, I have 2 really big guys here to TAKE YOU OUT!"
Suddenly Kevin Nash and Viscera hit the ring. They destroy Orton and Cena, then start to high five the fans and smile.
"Don't forget - WWE is about fun! Now if you'll excuse me, I have one last thing to do!"
HHH then pulls a shovel out of his sport jacket (it was taped on his back like Die Hard) and heads down to the ring. He passes Khali, who's still walking down.
HHH then literally digs a hole in the ring, tosses Orton and Cena in, then starts to do the motion of covering it with dirt. Then he pauses and takes out a CM Punk and Daniel Bryan DVD.
"Better bury these guys, too! #itsburyingtime"
At this point, Khali climbs the ladder and grabs the belt. Big Show then comes out and stares down Khali while HHH starts hi-fiving fans around the ring.
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 13, 2013 13:55:56 GMT -5
I want to be the very best Like no one ever was To win the belt is my real test To hold it is my cause
I will travel across the land Wrestling far and wide Each opponent will tap out No matter what their size
DANIEL BRYAN! In WWE! He knows its his destiny DANIEL BRYAN! Oh you're the best wrestler And you need a belt to defend
DANIEL BRYAN! A beard so true! Your wrestling will pull us through You wrestle and we'll watch you DANIEL BRYAN!!! GOTTA WRESTLE EM ALL!
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shaker
Team Rocket
The numbers don't lie - and they spell disaster for you at Sacrifice!
Posts: 779
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Post by shaker on Dec 13, 2013 12:36:43 GMT -5
"2013 was a weird time for everyone. We had planted the seeds for a new generation of guys led by CM Punk and Daniel Bryan, but at the time, most fans just didn't catch on to it."
Seriously though, I also think Del Rio will be a footnote. Cena will be a backstage guy at that point, helping new guys learn promo skills mostly. Orton will have retired after a huge backstage disagreement.
Punk and Bryan will be viewed as the veteran hands like Jericho is now - can easily be slotted into any position on the card and make fans care about them. They'll have a combined 15 title runs between the 2 of them.
Fans online (which now plugs directly into your brain) will complain about a new stable calling itself "World Class Wrestlers", saying that it disrespects an old school wrestling company and that "DA NEXUS was da best whutever happened to David Otunga??"
Also Diva matches will be about the same quality, but people will moan about them and say "Remember the peak of women's wrestling in the 2010s? You had AJ Lee, Kaitlyn, Brie Bella, and Natalya tearing it up out there every night! I remember when Natalya and Tamina Snuka main evented Raw!!!!!!!!"
Raw will be renamed Monday Night Mania and Smackdown will be Saturday Night's Main Event.
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